《Unending War》A New Life

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“Kavlina.”

“Yes?”

“How far do we still have to go?”

“I have no idea, but we should see a town of some sort once we get down.”

It’s been many days, perhaps even a week or two since the two of them left the village. The mountain, at least during their ascent, was quite abundant with food, the two of them quickly stockpiling some inside their bags. Yet as time goes on and they begin their descent, the ground becomes increasingly arid, the plants shorter, weaker, more brittle. There is, luckily, a stream that provides ample amounts of water, but for the two inexperienced travelers, they only feel their bodies growing weaker as they trek on, the burden on their backs becoming heavier with every step.

The Elyfesta has already left the slope, leaving a shadowy, bland landscape. The dry winds blow against their skin, specks of dust slipping into their worn-down boots. Slowly, they arrive at a clearing, the thin, frail mat of grass crunching beneath their feet as they pass.

“We should… probably set up here for the night,” Kavlina suggests, propping her bag against a rock as she sits, slightly sheltered from all the wind and dust. Her legs are buzzing from soreness, blisters stinging her toes. As she takes out her canteen, she drizzles what little is left onto her chapped lips, letting it trickle into her mouth.

“Alright,” Avalel answers, placing his bag down before receiving her canteen. “I’ll just go fill up some water.”

“Mm, thanks.”

The forest is all but a distant dream now. The life they once had, the little house they lived in, the days and days of eating potatoes and going to school, the villagers just going about their business… It all just feels so blurry now. The four years of just quiet peace spent with Avalel and Faresoenn in that place, just blending into a series of hazy memories for Kavlina.

They are all alone, alone in this mountain range called… Irrenl Mountains? She chuckles at the name, surprised she even remembers such a small detail from her childhood days learning about maps and geography for fun in her old home. Her knowledge helps a little in their current journey now, but alas, it is not food. Her stomach grumbles in acknowledgment.

Her body has thinned considerably over the trek, relying more and more on Avalel’s endurance and tenacity. As much as she believes Avalel doesn’t want to admit it (or the fact she doesn’t want to admit it), it’s a form of protection. Perhaps not the bravado or courage he so wants to emulate from his father, but to Kavlina, it’s fine enough. From the two of them carrying about the same amount of mass, to Avalel slowly volunteering to bear more of her burden, is quite an act one can seldom miss.

Sometimes, maybe just being alone away from all human activity isn’t necessarily a bad thing. Even on this side of the mountains where food is scarce, she feels an easy, comforting sort of peace every day and night. The only sounds she hears other than their repetitive footsteps are the rustling of leaves or the occasional caws and screams of high-flying birds. The solace and tranquility she feels when staring at the night sky is a wonderful thing, her eyes wide open and in awe even when Avalel is already asleep and snoring. Just the two of them, two young persons blindly heading east amongst the majesty of nature itself. Away from all the human tragedies in the world, away from their own tragedies.

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She hears the sloshing of water, disrupting her thoughts. Turning to her right, she sees Avalel walking back, holding their canteens as the water swirls inside to his steps, walking barefoot while his hair is damp.

“Hope I didn’t take too long,” Avalel says apologetically, handing the canteen to her.

“It’s fine,” Kavlina answers as she begins gulping down the water, feeling the bitter liquids flush down her throat. Within several moments, the water is already gone, her breath finally returning to a satisfying humidity. “I’ll refill them later.”

“Ah… Nothing better than a sip of water when you’re thirsty,” Avalel says, heaving a sigh of relief as he, too, empties his canteen.

“That isn’t exactly a sip,” Kavlina comments.

“Says you,” Avalel replies. The two of them laugh, amused over such a simple string of words. “It’s almost like we haven’t drank any water in months.”

“We’d die before then.”

“Just pretend it’s almost like that,” Avalel says. “Well, anyway, what should we eat for dinner tonight?”

“Probably just some fruits and that small creature you killed today with your sword. I’ll go find some firewood. And refill the water.” With that, Kavlina stands up, quickly snatching Avalel’s canteen before heading into the direction of the stream.

“No, I’ll collect the firewood,” Avalel quickly responds, nearly jumping up from his position. “I still have some strength left in me.”

“Just sit and wait for a while,” Kavlina turns, lightly pushing Avalel back down. “You can cook, remember?”

“I’ve been tasked with collecting firewood since around yesterday— no, two days ago! I’ll do it.”

“And that job was supposed to be my responsibility. We talked about this during our ascent, right?”

“You’ll tire yourself out. That’s why I took the job.”

Kavlina pauses, burning her gaze into Avalel’s eyes. “Are you saying… that I’m weak?”

“No, just that—”

“I… I can do this.” Without even waiting for Avalel’s response, she turns away again, walking further towards the sound of the stream. Even in her weakened state, she cannot relent to her physical deterioration. At the point where her body reaches near exhaustion, Avalel will simply have to exert himself further than before. Instead of relying on each other, Avalel will bear all the burden, and soon, he will fall too. Even if fate deems it to be an inevitable conclusion, Kavlina cannot just let herself rot. It’s just a peculiar sense of… duty that she has, a duty to serve her friend as much as he serves her.

Breathing frequently in the slightly thinner atmosphere, she breaks off several branches of a dead bush, grabbing them with one hand as her other hand holds the two canteens. She turns for her bag, but quickly realizes that, in her haste, she has forgotten to bring it with her. Great. Sighing, she carries the branches together between her arm and torso while she picks up a large handful of fallen leaves. It’s not nearly enough to start a campfire, but given it is but one trip of many, it is already a satisfactory amount. After filling up a sizable amount of water from the stream into the canteens, she returns, sweating, dizzy, and a little out of breath.

“Kavlina!” Avalel cries in worry, quickly rushing up to her and retrieving the branches, dropping them on the ground. “You definitely overextended yourself this time.”

“No… I’m fine—”

“Just sit down,” he says, frantically receiving the items on her. “I’ll head out to grab more firewood. Just sit and relax. You need it.”

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“... Fine, fine,” Kavlina answers reluctantly, defeated and tired. “Remember to grab your bag.”

“Right, for the wood. Right.” Gathering all necessary items, Avalel heads out, his body ever so filled with energy and strength.

He just never seems to get tired, Kavlina thinks as she reflects on her poor usage of her stamina.

The next moments seem like a blur to her. As she rests, staring at the dead bird with its feathers half plucked, Avalel walks to and fro, adding to the pile of branches, twigs, and leaves, before beginning to start the fire, rubbing his blistered palms on a stick as it spins on another piece of wood. She looks at the singular wound on its chest, shallowly sliced by the Anapadeia earlier. Drops of blood still trickle from it, staining the feathers that remain and dyeing its skin. Unlike her shock and disgust when witnessing the carnage around her days ago, she feels nothing for the bird. Being food, she doesn’t need to think anything of it. The bird, once a free being likely soaring above the clouds, is now about to be skewered on a stick, cooked while hovering over a fire. It’s just food for them, prolonging their lives for a bit longer. A certain sacrifice to let them continue living.

Finally, as night descends on the land, the fire is lit, Avalel breathing a sigh of relief as he stands back. Stabbing the bird with a sharpened branch, he places it over the fire, letting the flames lick the creature. The two of them cast long shadows into the darkness, enjoying the hearth of warmth as coldness begins to set in.

“Thanks, Lel,” Kavlina says, shuffling closer to the fire to warm her hands and feet.

“No problem at all,” Avalel beams. “Just another night on our long journey east.”

It’s quite comforting, to say the least. Kavlina stares at the fire, slowly consuming the wood while they enjoy the light and warmth emitted from it. Above, the stars blink in the sky, occasionally hiding behind clouds for a while before they reappear. The vastness, the silence as they hear only the flickering of the flames besides their own breaths. It’s already been so many nights, but it just doesn’t get old for her.

“You know, I’ve been wondering…” Avalel says, breaking the silence. “You came from the Outside, right?”

“Yes. I told you that a few times.”

“So… What was it like for you before you came to the forest? I wanted to ask this for a while now, actually.” His tone is wavering, careful not to tread on some unknown territory that Kavlina may have.

“That’s what you want to ask me after all these years?” she laughs. She appreciates Avalel’s concern, of course, but it’s slightly amusing to see Avalel stumbling around his words despite his usual confidence.

“I’m sorry if that’s bothering you. Especially since, well…”

“It’s fine,” she says. “There’s nothing wrong with asking for a story.” With that, she gathers what little memories are left from her childhood, unlocking them to her dear friend after so many years.

“I was the eldest child of a decently prominent family in some city west of these mountains,” she explains. “There wasn’t really much I experienced as a child. I went to school, played with classmates, and was taught the language and some math. You could probably say I was fortunate for the war at the time.”

“There… is a war?” Avalel asks, yet his voice just seems too distant, so unaware of the true scope of war.

“I should’ve realized sooner, but maybe that was how my parents protected me. My father, for being the scum that he was, avoided even mentioning war around me despite working as a high-ranking intelligence officer. My mother had quit her job soon after I was born, refusing to hire a maid and instead chose to raise me full-time.”

“What’s a maid?”

“Something like a servant. Anyway, the skies used to be completely dark at night where I lived. There were so many artificial lights we simply couldn’t see the stars. And even when we had blackouts, the sky was peppered with smoke, hiding us from whatever planes were above. I didn’t know what it meant to be afraid, so I played hide-and-seek with my mother, and sometimes, even my father would join in the fun.”

“Wow…” To Kavlina’s disappointment, Avalel’s eyes are wide open in awe, sparkling as he immerses himself in her tale.

It’s a wonderful thing to be blissfully ignorant and away from all the chaos, isn’t it?

“I was supposed to have a younger sister at one point. The entire family was excited… at least until my mother had a miscarriage. After that, my father started to, well… become more addicted to his work. It didn’t take long for him to probe too deep into matters, and the rest is history…” Her voice fades away, realizing the haziness of her memory.

She didn’t want to remember those later days. The days where her mother slowly became overprotective of her. The days where her father would sometimes not return home for weeks, so engrossed in his work. The days when bombs began falling more frequently onto the buildings, spending more and more of her time in an underground bunker.

And the day when in fear, she took up a knife and murdered the man who had become a dangerous stranger to her and her mother.

“The Outside is not as beautiful as you think, Lel. The peaceful forest where the Old Man so desperately protected is a rare place, a place where war doesn’t reach.” She looks up to the sky, seeing those ageless stars blinking back at her. So vast, so unchanging, eternally being the hanging lights of guidance to many a traveler.

She looks at Avalel, his expression becoming more grim. If not for those soldiers, perhaps he is still living that mundane, safe life, growing up under the guidance and protection of Faresoenn until he is fully independent as an adult. Perhaps they’ll still be training for self-defense every day, but more as a way of exercise. In that village, there is no need for any force. He’ll simply be removed from all that chaos, and one day, she too will forget about her childhood, spending the rest of her days in that safe haven.

“Dad was a good person,” Avalel says. “Maybe he’s still protecting us even at this moment, wherever he may be.” He lies down, his hands stretching towards the stars. “Maybe, one day, he’ll come back and protect the entire world from war— Who am I kidding? He’s probably killed by those soldiers back then.” He sighs, his eyes becoming watery, reflecting the light of the flames.

It is because of Faresoenn’s sacrifice that they can live in this temporary moment of peace and quiet, Kavlina finally realizes.

“Kavlina, You know…” Avalel begins.

“Yeah?”

“Even though the Outside is a place with constant war and strife, it’s still pretty beautiful. Like this mountain, for example. It’s maybe not as beautiful as I think, I trust you on that. Maybe Dad wanted to protect me away from the Outside because he knew of the war you talk about somehow. Still, I want to experience the world in full. And if I do encounter war, then I’ll just protect the people from it, just as Dad protected you and me.”

Kavlina looks at him in shock. “You’re… serious?”

“At least I’ll try with whatever I can,” Avalel answers. “War is what makes the Outside less beautiful, right? If I can protect people from it, then the world will be a better, prettier place.”

“I don’t know whether to call you ambitious or courageous, Lel,” Kavlina chuckles. “I just want to live a simple life and have you protect m—”

“Ah! The bird’s getting overcooked!” Avalel suddenly realizes, quickly sitting up and moving it away from the flames.

Kavlina sighs in relief, silently thanking the cooked bird for its services. She has just blurted something out, hasn’t she? Something she’d rather not admit, at least not so obviously.

The night continues on. They still have quite a journey to go.

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