《My Life As A Creator》S12: Emotion
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I couldn't see anything after that. It was both simultaneously too bright and too dark to see anything. The catalyst-link in my chest shattered, my link to Niki was gone. When my vision returned, so too did the feeling of being somewhere. I could barely tell that there was any Ishu around. I was laying on my back. It was hard to sit up. There were 2 figures in front of me. Standing tall. Rubbing my eyes, to try and make out the figures. They were covered in fur on most of their body. And they had a tail. What were these things? Were they always here? Looking around I could see the damage to the ground all around. Chunks of the ground floating. The geography didn't look the same anymore, everything was upturned. Large parts of the earth were sticking up like someone had dug in and started to lift. Panicking, I looked around for Yè's body. "Where did you go Yè..?" I wanted to hold him near me again. I wanted to look at him again. I wanted him again.
One of the things knelt down and patted me on the head. I didn't understand.
"Here. Bai. chi." The thing had trouble speaking, like it was its first time saying these words in a tongue that it had never used before. Everything was hazy, it was hard to tell some things apart. But just from feeling the Ishu in the surrounding space, whatever this Thing in front of me was. It wasn't something I had seen before. Rubbing my eyes didn't really help, but upon doing so, I could tell that something was wrong with me. My Metal-blessed hand felt different, my eyes didn't seem.. Right. I was still confused about the whole thing that was going on, I couldn't parse some things correctly. The other Thing, which I'll refer to as 'Creature' to make things easier, put their hand on the Thing's shoulder. Following their gaze I could partially see two figures in the distance, along with there being various kinds of spikes, floating terrain, and speckles of some kind of light and darkness. Why was my sight fine only a bit ago but now wasn't? But the Thing and Creature started to turn transparent and took off at incredible speeds, sprinting towards the other two. I couldn't parse what was happening in the distance that well, so I staggered to my feet to look around me. Something happened here and I didn't know what had happened. I was a bit panicked since Yè & Niki were missing, my sight was partially robbed, and the catalyst-link I had in my chest was gone. I did a quick examination of my body to see if anything else was wrong. My clothes were as they were. My Metal-blessed arm didn't feel right. I couldn't fully feel like I was standing on my legs. My body had this phantom feeling, it's hard to describe the feeling exactly. I felt like I was in two places at once. Like seeing an afterimage but instead of seeing, it's entirely a feeling. At any moment I was going to fall through the ground into an endless void of nothingness or something. I wanted to relax, but as best as I could, I couldn't. There was too much on my mind to even try to relax and assess the situation. Moving was kind of taxing to try and do. Just the way my body and mind felt, was so different. It's just very hard to try and describe how it was at that point. I don't know the right words to put into feeling how separated yet whole I felt physically, and yet some kind of metaphysical state, that I was in. Honestly it was fascinating. But I had to find that Thing and Creature again. They appeared to be friendly enough. I took a deep breath and concentrated on Pure Ishu Shaping. I just needed to throw a very faint field to 'see' where to go. It was tough to try and do it. My core didn't feel right either. Like my body and spirit were on two different.. What are they called, planes? realities? existences? I never did study that kind of area. But I instead went with a different method of tossing more like a net in a given area, though not really with Pure Ishu. Instead, I was able to use the Ishu in the surrounding space. It felt familiar, like it was a part of me. Like it was also Yè's and Niki's. Two people in my life that meant the most to me.
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I can't very well say 'there' even though that's what I thought. Trying to run over in the direction that I felt multiple bodies, I must have looked silly, like I was exhausted but still trying to run. It was also odd that I could feel everything around me at a much larger distance than I could before. Has my partial sight loss extended the talent of being able to feel Ishu of everything further? There was destruction happening before me. Flames, sparks, lightning, crystals, rocks. Even if my vision couldn't make out the figures exactly, I knew one of them was that Agent, and the other had to be some upper military. That must have been the one that shot the energy. Angerly, I tried to shape the dirt under them, to sink them into the ground. But they were moving too fast, or I was Shaping too slow. But the Thing and Creature seemed to give them a run for their abilities. They looked like they were phasing in and out of existence as they rained down blows and tossed them around almost like they were nothing. The military one was thrown near me, their metal armor clunking to the ground as they failed to recover. The Thing came back in, leaping down onto them and smashing their chest, I could hear the metal crack and what must have been bone breaking. It stabbed into their abdomen with its hand. No. Claws. It didn't pull anything out, but it did pull their arm, stomping onto their head and pulling it out of its socket. This Thing didn't want the quick kill, it wanted them to suffer. "Why are you doing this to them?" I don't know why I said it, maybe a brief bit of shaji-ity. The military Shaji wanted to cry, I could feel their emotions, they were in intense pain. Like the thing became impatient with this Shaji's response and it picked them up, by the head, squeezing on it. The helmet slowly starting to crack. It ended it swiftly. It roared as it stabbed into the Shaji's throat and ripped out part of their spine. I was a bit sickened by it's display of brutalism. I didn't want them to die, just to suffer. Or maybe I did want them to die. Because they were the ones that killed Yè. I wanted my revenge, but I wasn't the one that did it. "No! You shouldn't have kill them!" Why was I speaking out about them? I wanted them to suffer and die. The ears on the top of its head went back, like a child being scolded by their parent, it must have felt a bit guilty. Looking for the Creature, I saw it throwing the Agent around like they were a canine's toy. Tossing, throwing, and slamming them into the ground. I don't think they had as much malice for this Shaji, but they took part in what happened, so it wanted to hurt them. The Agent put their hand up, most likely to defend themselves with a Shape, but the Creature grabbed thier arm and squeezed down onto it, till it broke. It was growing impatient as well, but Agent let out a cry of pain. So it was entertaining the Creature more than the military one did the Thing. "Stop! Don't kill that one! Let them leave." I let out, trying to get over to them. The Creature let go of them and seemingly blinked out of existence.
Tears in their eyes. "Y-you'll pay for this B-Beixi!! Y-you've made yourself even more of an e-enemy of Fenzoshu."
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"What do you mean? I didn't do anything wrong."
"Y-you’re now known as the Hunted A-augmentor because of what you've done to these b-beasts!"
"But they were just beasts. They live much shorter-"
"That doesn't m-matter! You gave them the a-ability to S-Shape! That's in clear v-violation of the law! And now you've made t-these things, along with the m-murder of GengealPyro Lín. Your t-title will become F-Forbidden now!"
Holding their wrist, the Agent fled. "Do not give chase to that Shaji." Directing my words coldly to the Creature looking at the Agent running away. staggering back to a sitting position. I couldn't keep myself standing anymore. The thing leaned in for a hug. It felt soft and nice. I couldn't help but to start crying. Yè.. Yè, I miss you. It went even further and I started to break down even more, my body felt limp. Nothing felt real anymore. Yè. I loved you and now you are gone forever. Trying to return the hug, I couldn't lift my arms, my body rejected everything I told it, my mind was filled with nothing but sorrow for Yè. The other one came in as well for a hug. It was all too much for me. Whatever these things were, was all I had left now.
I could never return to Fenzoshu again.
Never walk under the stars.
Buy wani again.
Yè again.
Again.
My mind drifted off after that and everything went black.
In, what I could guess to call, my sleep, it felt like an eternity of reliving that day. But the ending was always the same. There wasn't anything I could do to have stopped Lín from killing Yè, and Me. But why did Yè come? Did he put in a missing person's request? It seems like something Fenzoshu wouldn't bother with. Maybe it was my position that nudged them in looking for me. But that Agent. Yè. I saw them, what had to be quite a few years prior to this happening. Why the delay then? Certainly that Agent could've brought Yè to see me shortly after the meeting. Did they train Yè to detain me? Did I look like I lost my sanity and their only connection in bringing me was through someone that knew me? Hunted. The military was already considered after me, so why try to detain me instead of killing me on the spot? I don't understand their motives or why they acted like that. Yè. None of it made sense. If the military wanted someone dead, they'd do it, that's what they do with Hunted and Forbidden titles. Did they want me for my research? Don't they normally kill people like me? Yè. Those Things. Just what were they? Yè's body and Niki, I couldn't feel them around after that... Whatever that event was. How could something be so bright and yet too dark at the same time? There was nothing certain about what had happened. Yè. Nothing seemed real because none of it made sense. It had to be a fever dream. I was going to wake up and everything will be normal. Yè and Lín will be alive. Those Things don't exist. Yè. my sight will be fine.
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// ERROR: Reconstruction emotionally compromised. ERROR: Reconstruction emotionally compromised. ERROR: Reconstruction emotionally compromised. ERROR: Reconstruction emotionally compromised.//
// Amanuensis in possible danger. //
// !!WARNING!! !!WARNING!! !!WARNING!! !!WARNING!! !!WARNING!! !!WARNING!! !!WARNING!! !!WARNING!! //
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*Well. That can't be good. I'll sooner be replaced then give up on this.*
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*MW-Index: Abort process and restart the Reconstruction after this point.*
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// Warning: Events may be recalled inaccurately. //
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*I'd rather avoid this. But seeing what's happening in this room, I'd rather not risk losing the Reconstruction altogether. Do it. Restart them.*
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// ERROR: Authorization required. //
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*Override: A.M.W.Dot.I.O.L. Code: One Seven Dash Five Dash Three Nine.*
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// Authorization granted. //
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*I swear you'd disassemble me before stopping any harm coming to you.*
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