But what really was a couple of minutes in the grand scheme of my life? Well, if I had to dedicate my life to making this experiment a reality, I want to save every second as much as possible. But. The thought crossed my mind. I am willing to sacrifice everything around me but myself. I was putting myself on this pedestal that my life means more than anything else. I'm going around and changing the life of these beasts for my own gain. The gain of my people. But will those people actually want this? What if I'm doing all this for naught but myself? What if my finding were to be rejected, that no one actually wanted to benefit the people as much as myself? Was my aim to benefit the people? Of course it was, it was to give them the opportunity to learn something new. The mastery of Light and Dark... Do I fear that this long exertion will have been led for nothing...? "Improve yourself to improve the people." I will give myself these masteries before returning and open many doors for the people. It'll take many generations till the Shaji race of Fenzoshu will all have access to these masteries. But I have some nagging feeling. The rejection that it could bring. It's a different feeling from telling people we can potentially have these masteries and them rejecting my theories. And them outright rejecting these masteries that we-, I can provide. I couldn't find what I wanted to do anymore. This shouldn't have been a set back, and yet, there I was. Standing there. Going back and forth on something that should be uplifting the people, or just giving up. My life long plan. My dream. Now on the edge of my own rejection. A feeling brushed by my leg.

It was Niki. The smoky fur with patches of pitch black and snow white that glinted in the light. It looked up at me, with its clay coloured eyes. Even if it wasn't for the people. It was for me. To find the True Light and Dark. I had finally found a name in which to address my companion. I couldn't help but to smile. I knelt down to pat it before it jumped away and ran to the firepit. Yes, this was a goal I had to see to the end, I couldn't give up part way through from a small setback. With a deep breath, the makeshift cane I was using, I held it up and set it a fiery blaze. Gazing into flame before tossing it in and watching the fire erupt. For what is spare time if I didn't use it, just a waste really. Just like all life, the burning passion, it may take a different shape, but it's all the same. The same light to keep us going to reach for the shadows to be uncovered. Ah, but enough sentimentality, it was something that I didn't want to weigh me down.

While the flames roared in the firepit, I decided now was as good a time as any to deal with my shoulder. Taking in another deep, I prepared myself. A simple Shape to bend the metal over and off, with little blood trickle. Ah, this must have been why I've been so tired. My body must have been Shaping to keep the blood in while under the metal I placed over it. Sigh. If I would have thought that my body was going to end up doing this, I wouldn't have bothered giving myself a stiff shoulder. You never fully know about your body, I suppose. The unconscious effects you have on yourself and your environment can be troublesome from time to time, but, it can also prove to be beneficial. "Let's have a decent meal today." I said to Niki.

After that it was just recovering my Ishu and resting. I had a decent amount of food stockpiled so I was able to take a break from going out and doing more physical experiments. This did give me the chance to examine the crystal that I had taken from before. Turns out it was just salt. It wasn't going to get any closer to Light or Dark, but at least it'll preserve food longer. Well, not the tiny crystal I had. That I used to make some food at least a bit better some night. At some point I did go back to that cave and get some more, enough to fill half of a small pot with it along with a decent sized block for cooking on.

I didn't do much for, hmm, maybe a couple of months. Approximately I'd have to guess around 5 months to a year. Well I say I didn't do much when it was the daily in and out of food, sleep, Shaping, physical workout, and such. Nothing exciting to my research. Winter came and went which I still pretty much did the same thing, the physical work outs were shorter though since I didn't have a winter outfit. Really I only came with about 3, and they were all pretty much the same. One top and jacket were tattered and shredded here and there because it was the one I'd go out to do research in. I did bring a small sewing kit with me in case of tears, but some of these were a lot bigger and not recoverable. I did think of leaving and buying cloth. But I didn't exactly have a way off the island after thinking about it. I was kind of trapped here in a sense. I could try to water Shape my way, but the nearest continent to memory was a week away by boat and I'd be moving much slower than a boat. You know, in theory, Shaping cloth should be possible since it's natural and should carry a small amount of Ishu in it. Armour and weapons can be Shaped because they're made of metal, so what's stopping use from Shaping cloth? Or maybe we can and it's not worth the effort. Hmm. Certainly something to think about. Too bad I never thought about doing that while I had that free time. But I did get to spend more time with Niki in that time.

One thing I did was study the flora and searched through that cave some more. I guess I never did point it out, mostly because of how focused I was on my research and having a sustained living, compared to Fenzoshu it was very different. Because Fenzoshu isn't natural, well it is because it was made by Shaji long ago and they simply Shaped the island into existence from parts of the world around them, but it isn't in the sense of having its own native flora. It's all planted there by Shaji who specialize in plants. Though I believe it's only in certain sections with certain plants and other areas have to be clear for the military section for their warfare and siege training. I haven't 'explored' the island despite living there for 80-some years because I had no interest in the island itself. I should've taken Yè out for a scroll during the night. I'm sure he would've enjoyed the nature and the stars in contrast to the 'fake' night that Fenzoshu has. It's real sunlight, or as real as it gets I suppose, but Fenzoshu never truly gets dark like night since there are those that still have to walk those streets at all hours. Those nights in Xocha were certainly something else. It was actually dark dark, and it was wonderful. On this continent, which I don't think it was named when I came to it, it still gets dark like anywhere else of course, but it's not like that dark of Xocha.

Ah, sorry to get off topic. Where was I? Oh right, the cave did have more than just salt, and yes I did taste anything similar looking to salt to make sure I wasn't grabbing more salt, no the other minerals I found did not taste good. In fact, I'd go as far as to say that no one should be eating minerals in their raw form or really any for that matter, salt being the exception here. Anyways; further exploring it, I did find there to be a system within it. I'm not sure how long I was exploring it, but at some point I did become uncomfortable with how long it felt like I had spent in there. It wasn't claustrophobia, as the first night I spent here was within a shell made of dirt and rock, but something about the creatures in it. They were all blind. Light didn't mean anything to them. Something about the thought of losing my sight and living in total darkness forever made me uneasy. Sure the darkness would help for the True Darkness part, but I also wanted True Light, and being completely unable to see if I've been able to accomplish that would be a disappointment, to say the least. I did find some glowing mushrooms within, but I didn't dare grab them. One section in the medical field that I didn't learn was the PDC, or Poisons and Disease Control. Which is mostly why I have only cultivated my own food and fished. Mushrooms are notorious for causing illness, and being that I'm seas and continents away from anywhere medical, it's not a pleasant thought of taking the risk of adding texture or a flavour to my meals. That first trip in and out had me a bit short of breath, something about being down there from the middle of the day to early night had my chest a bit tight. Just dark to not as dark, especially with those creatures. At this point I just wanted to be home again with some light from my furnace.

It took a few trips but I did manage to find something rather nice. Aurourline, Safs, Suloxyhyte, & Tugillby. All in small quantities, but nonetheless this was a huge find. If I had any talent in Shaping jewels, I could've probably found more, but with Pure Ishu Shaping I was able to find the surface oddity in Ishu with them. Suloxyhyte & Safs could be the actual catalysts that I was looking for. For those that don't know. Aurourline is a jewel that has a very unique appearance in that it's a rainbow, every angle you look at it, it'll always show all 8 colours. Red, Orange, Yellow, Green, Cyan, Blue, Purple, & Violet. Tugillby is a semi-transparent hazy white. Suloxyhyte is a transparent black. And Safs is a nearly clear jewel. You could be fooled to think it was glass until you've felt it. Now when I say 'surface oddity' I mean that it was different from the rest of the cavern walls, like how you can feel the difference in texture, that's all. My recollection on Toshuto isn't great, but I can't think of anyone using jewels as catalysts. Well I guess except for the lights. I feel like those were made with jewels. Hmm.. There had to be more, right? They simply wouldn't have just made lights and coloured lights then stopped there, there had to be more practical applications that jewels could be used for. Ah, but this isn't my field so maybe I just don't know what I'm talking about.