I see white. The brightest white I have ever seen in my whole life. For a moment, I believe I am actually dead. Then I see a face. I thought it was my brother at first, but then it clears and I see Gray.

I hoped that I would have died. I hoped I wouldn't have to see the pity in someone's eyes again.

None of my hopes has come to life lately, and therefore, I don't care anymore. I am now a hopeless, careless person.

I am destruction. I am devastation. I am nothing more than a disaster, and I can't even save the world from myself.

Gray is saying my name. He's pleading. He thinks I am dead. He doesn't know I can't die.

He is crying now. I am trying to move my arms to put a hand on his shoulder, but I can't move.

My eyes are open, but my body is paralyzed. I open my mouth to speak. Nothing comes out.

Gray knows my eyes are open. He saw them open. He looked me right in the eyes; how could he not know I am alive?

Then I remember. When I try to sleep and close my eyes, I see everything. It's like my eyes never closed.

My eyes aren't open. They are closed, but I can see as clear as day.

I can hear my heartbeat. It has started up again. I hear the heart monitor start beeping again.

I see Gray shocked. His face is priceless with all the surprise embedded in his features.

I twitch my fingers and toes to see if I can move yet. I am no longer paralyzed.

I speak. My words are soft as I say, "I honestly thought that one would be the one to do it." I sit up on the bed I am on.

I feel depressed. I feel like when someone makes you a promise and they break it.

Gray looks at me with the eyes of someone who has seen a ghost. I guess in a way he has.

I look at him and shyly whisper, "I should probably explain..." I look away, ashamed of myself. I am disappointed in everything I do.

He looks at me like I just said something stupid. "Ya think?" He exasperatedly asked.

I nod. "Right... so in addition to being super destructive with strange powers, I am also immortal. I thought that if a gun could kill that soldier as quickly as it did, that I could die too. But as you can see, I am still alive." I explained this to him as his face changed from shocked to confused, and back to shocked.

"I saw you cry. I saw you cry over me. You still care about me like you did back in grade school." I told him. He was surprised.

"How did you know I was crying? You were dead while I was crying." He asked in surprise.

I told him how even when my eyes are closed, I can see through them. I told him how I came back to life after I was conscious. I told him how my body was paralyzed, but I was aware.

I explained everything to him. He was confused. He didn't understand how I could do all this while being dead. He didn't understand how I could keep this from him.

Eventually, he got up and led me to my room. I stayed in my room for the rest of the day. I spent the rest of my day looking out my window. I spent the rest of the day longing to go outside, to breathe fresh air for the first time in four years.

The next day I am let out of my room. Gray wanted to see me. They led me to the beautiful door again for the 15th thousandth time since I have been here.

They opened the door. Gray is there at his desk. He is in a tux. I have never seen Gray in a tux. Usually, he is in a uniform—no black and white suit with a tie.

I assume Gray sees the confusion on my face because he tells his guards to leave so he can explain. They walked out the door with no warnings or complaints this time.

I question him with my eyes. He nods. "We are going to dinner." I motion for him to go on. He continues, "My father is coming, and I want him to be impressed by you. I want you to show off. I realize that you aren't proud of your ability. I need you to carry pride in your power." I am angry, but I swallow my words back to let him continue.

"What makes you hate your power. What did you do. Back at school, we heard the rumours that you killed your brother, is that true?" The question at the end killed me.

I look around me and see stuff rattling with my pulses of adrenaline and emotions. Gray is trying to keep me calm before I blow up. I take a deep breath. I tell him about my brother. I remember crying at one point. I told him it was an accident.

His arms wrapped around my body as I heave sobs into his chest. He is telling me he is sorry. He is telling me he understands. He is telling me he loves me.

I stop crying. Gray loves me. He told me he loved me. He kisses my forehead and lets go of me, and I just stand there in shock.

I smiled at him and asked, "Do you mean it?" He smiled back and nodded. "I always have," he said, "Ever since I saw you by yourself by the fence," He said.

He had me. I was lost in his words. I will do anything for him at this point. I tell him I will show off for his father. I tell him I will work for him.

He looks like he just got a new toy for Christmas. His smile is so big like he accomplished something.

Little did I know, he had accomplished something.