Dragon Carrier

“You couldn’t even get this right? This one simple thing that required such minimal effort from you?”

Steely grey-blue eyes glared intensely at similarly colored eyes, the latter averting their gaze to their owner’s gloved hands on her lap. Said owner being a raven-haired young woman, who bit her trembling bottom lip as her hands clenched the skirt of her luxurious deep blue dress.

“No answer? Then I take that you’re admitting that you did nothing to gain favor with that young lord, Lilith,” the glaring older woman continued, opening her elegant fan and looking out the window of the carriage, her fan hiding the disgust on her face. “All you had to do was speak when spoken to, keep your attention on him, flatter him, and of course, be subtly flirtatious with him to show your interest! Any noblewoman could sway a man with just a look and a smile!”

“I.. I did all that. At least I think I did,” the young woman - Lilith - protested, albeit with a small voice, afraid to speak up further. The older woman snapped her fan closed, the younger flinching from the sound. Hesitatingly, Lilith raised her gaze to meet the piercing stare of the older woman… Her very own mother. If looks could kill, Lilith knew she would have been dead moments ago just from all the daggers her mother stared at her.

“You clearly did not! My methods are flawless, you’re just too stupid and incompetent to execute it properly! Did you not hear the comments he told me of you? You’re dull and dreary, he felt all the conversations you had were bland,” she nearly yelled, pausing to take a breath. “All you ever do is shame your father and I whenever we take you out on these outings! I loathe the thought that we have procreated a useless girl like you who does nothing for the Frostdane name.”

Lilith’s hands relaxed their grip on the skirt, no longer biting on her lip anymore. Eyes getting watery, she closed them to keep her tears from spilling, thinking back on her answers to the man her parents picked as a suitor. At the time, she thought they were fitting to his questions, picking her words very carefully to try to gain favor with him. But perhaps her own limited knowledge and experience had her come off as lifeless, unable to add more to his attempts of conversation. In hindsight now, it seemed she really did come off as insipid as a blank wall to him.

“You’re right… I’m sorry, I’ll try to do better next time,” she spoke with a shaky voice, the older woman crossing her arms without letting up on her intense stare. It was only when a large hand rested on her knee that her attention was diverted, focusing on her husband sitting next to her with a much softer gaze.

“There are still available suitors for her. I’m sure one of them will be interested in her soon,” he said calmly to her, his wife sighing and nodding. Though she looked unconvinced regardless.

“I dearly want to believe that you’re right. I just hope it won’t take much longer than it has to. An alliance with another house is what we need the most in our time of need. Our funds are running a bit too low for my comfort, dear.”

“And for that I apologize, I expected the inheritance to hold us up for much longer than this. Lilith has your natural beauty, so it will be a matter of time before she catches the eye of a wealthy family name.”

As the two gazed into each other’s eyes, silently giving each other comfort and encouragement, their young daughter Lilith slowly opened her eyes, her head lowered to stare down at the silky fabric of her dress skirt. She took this reprieve from her mother’s reprimands gratefully, but she knew that with each failure of getting a suitor interested would only wear out her mother’s patience more and more. There was no telling what her mother would do once she reached a breaking point. Time was running out, especially now that her eighteenth birthday had passed three months ago.

Lilith glanced out the closest window to her, seeing the verdant green lawns of their estate, those familiar alabaster walls fencing them. Seemed they were almost home. She quietly sighed through her nose, glad that she could soon escape the ivory white interior of the carriage soon. Sooner she got away from her parents, the better.

“Lilith, you’re not to eat anything else after that failure of yours today,” her mother suddenly spoke up, voice stern as she lifted her head to stare down at Lilith.

“But… I only had breakfast and I didn’t get the chance to-”

“Does a disobedient dog get rewarded, Lilith? No, and you shouldn’t expect any reward after humiliating us. Therefore you are to retire to your chambers and not leave until tomorrow morning. I’ll have one of the guards stationed nearby to keep an eye on you, only escorting you when you must use the washroom. I honestly can’t bear the sight of you much longer after what you did.”

Lilith’s mouth opened a bit to speak up again, but she stopped herself before a single word could come out. Holding her tongue, she simply nodded to her mother’s words. It wasn’t like there was much choice, and talking back would just make the punishment worse. Even if the pain of hunger was coursing through her abdomen. Once the carriage came to a stop, she waited for one of the guards stationed at the front of their home to approach and open the door for her, Lilith stepping out first to get to her room quickly. Though not without hearing her mother’s comment of “Maybe a thinner appearance might entice a young lord to court her.”

Holding the skirts of her dress in her hands, she walked ahead of her parents, briefly gazing up at the matching alabaster exterior of the manor. Another guard, dressed in black and silvery armor, opened the front door for her as she gave a small nod to him, passing him by and entering the manor. Her heels would click against the beige marble tiles of the floor, the walls a pale cream color to complement the tiles, as she hurried through the halls, passing by paintings of differing sizes and some sculptures. Everything moved in a blur for her, Lilith only focusing on what was ahead. Her eyes tunnel-visioned on her white bedroom door, the gold lever door knob glinting from the sunlight coming in from the window down the hall.

Gloved hand reaching out for it, relief washed over her as it turned and the door opened, Lilith stepping inside in mere seconds. After shutting the door, her back pressed against it as she realized how near out of breath she was. Walking that quickly while wearing a corset under the dress wasn’t the best idea, but it was well worth it to get away from those two. The damn corset had to come off, though, if she wanted to take deeper breaths. Grabbing her dress skirts again, she walked over to her mahogany vanity, turning slightly so she could see the zipper at her back. Reaching for it and pulling it down, she quickly slipped off the elbow length sleeves as she let the dress fall around her feet, and exposing a prominent black spiral marking on her upper left arm.

Stepping out of it, she reached back again and started to undo the hooks of the corset, each one giving her more relief until it was finally undone. Now in just her undergarments, she took those much needed deep breaths to settle the quick beating of her heart. Hand over her chest, she waited til she had caught her breath before reaching down to undo the straps of her heels, stepping out of them to give her aching feet some relief as well. She could go and slip on her nightwear but… One glance at her bed - the fluffy pale blue comforter so inviting to her tired and aching body - it was all it took to get her to walk toward it and drop herself onto it.

Despite what a terrible day it was - having to wear those restricting clothes, forcing herself to talk with a man to hopefully get him interested in her, and then listening to her mother lash out at her - it almost felt like a bad dream now that she was in the comfort of her own bed. Grabbing and pulling a pillow close to herself, she held onto it tightly as she pressed her face against the satin fabric, holding back her tears that wanted so desperately to stream down her cheeks. She could cry, but what would it do for her? It wouldn’t change anything about this - not her parents, not their treatment of her, nor her life. It was futile, there was no escape from this. And how she had tried before… But she apparently couldn’t get that right either.

Every attempt to escape was a failure, and soon she understood to give up on it entirely. Her only way of escape now was to get engaged with someone of her parents’ choosing. They clearly wanted someone of a wealthy name, but seeing the way these suitors were brought up, how they had much more freedom than her… It just felt too difficult for her to relate to them. Would they be able to share that freedom with her? Or was she just changing cages? Lilith held the pillow tighter, tears slipping down her cheeks as she breathed shakily. Maybe nothing will ever change.