My flames were back to being purple and white, much to my disappointment. Apparently it's the cost of saving Laianne that time... But hey, if she died back there then she wouldn't be here to help me with my training so I'm not really complaining.

Alrod was still out hunting wasps, while Jana decided to take a bath. The thing is, she can't go too far away from me, but she can't bathe in the open for me to see, either. So she ended up doing her thing behind the sleeping Danrel to my right. The fella was big enough to serve as a wall between my eyes and her, even when asleep.

I could hear water splashing, but I couldn't care less and I won't even try to peek. I'm not a lecherous sex beast, and if I really want to see a naked girl, I think I can just ask Laianne anytime. But in all seriousness, I didn't come here to get laid, I'm here to train.

“So I do it like, this?”

Laianne told me that to change the shape of Aster, one only need to imagine. But for beginners, like kids, it's advisable to treat Aster like clay you mold with your hands. I don't feel good about being an utter noob at this, but for now I settled with rotating my cupped hands around the purple flame, slow, carefully, like making a perfect, round snowball.

To my shock and awe, the ever-erratic flames that previously had no concrete form swirled inward to form a dense, bright sphere only as large as a tennis ball. Its size was puny as hell, but it was visually pleasing. The core was white, while purple gas coated it over. It reminded me of the sun, its surface rough from the fiery eruptions.

“Well done.” Said Laianne, her eyes closed and crinkled, her pink lips curved into a broad smile.

For a second I really thought she was pleased, until she tip-toed and plopped her hand down my head, ruffling my white hair.

I flicked her hand off and gave her a glare.

“You know what? I'm so going to spank you with an Aster-covered hand when the time comes.”

“Hmmmm... I'm kind of looking forward to that, but then again you're not manly enough to do something so bold.” She said with a yawn trailing after her words.

“You... You're really a masochist, aren't you?”

She ignored me and carried on to the next lesson.

“Now, what you're going to do is throw it.” She said.

She clung to my left arm and pointed forward, to a tree at least ten meters away from where we stood. It was taller than others that surrounded it, and looked quite similar to eucalyptus in its upright branches and elongated leaves.

“Like this?” I asked as I took a stance that resembled a pitch.

“That's kind of a weird posture...” Her brow flattened. “Oh whatever. Try hitting that tree.”

I breathed in, out, and focused on the pale tree. I don't know anything about my accuracy but, I think I'll at least hit it if the trunk is thick. I must hit the tree, the tree, tree.

“... Here goes!” I exerted force forward. The fireball launched out of my hand.

Silence.

Something was wrong with it. Laianne at my side burst out laughing.

“Wow!” She doubled over, her arms crossed over her stomach. “Your incompetence really amazes me.”

No kidding. The ball left my hand, but it was um... It wasn't traveling as fast as I thought it would be... ‘Launched’ isn't even the term I'd use. The ball was just there, in front of me, floating, and maybe moving a little forward every second. It was like watching a snail walk on air, more than an object that was thrown with force.

What the hell... Do I really suck that hard?

“Are you kidding.”

“You really are an idiot eh...” She said as she watched the fireball traverse distance in super-slow motion.

“Why is it traveling so slow? I threw it perfectly!”

She shook her head with a palm on her face. “Why it's traveling slow you ask? It's because you didn't throw it.”

“Ha? But I did!”

“No you didn't. Aster responds to your thoughts. If you think that you're throwing a ball, Aster will behave like a ball and fly forward like you threw it.”

“Oh... So you're saying, what's important is that I think that I'm throwing it?”

“Right.” She nodded. “In truth, you're not really throwing it. You don't need physical force to command Aster.”

“Interesting...”

It's like that matrix thing, ‘there's no spoon.’

“What went wrong though?” I asked. “I properly thought I was throwing it.”

“No. You were focused on hitting the tree, more than thinking about throwing.” She said and pointed at the meager fireball slowly drifting away from us.

“You told that Aster ball that it should hit the tree, no matter what. So in essence, you were controlling its trajectory. And when you ‘throw’ things, you can aim, but you can't control where it's headed. Your commands were in conflict with each other, and so the ball is stuck now with no clear direction.”

“Now that's complicated.” I said. “I thought magic is magic, and didn't need explanations?”

“Now you know better.” She closed her eyes and massaged her forehead.

So again, I don't have to really throw it. Then...

“Okay, I'll try it again.” I disposed of the floating ball with my will, making it explode in midair.

I created another ball on my right palm, but this time I didn't need to do that snowball molding thing since I already saw how it was done. I just summoned flames and wished for it to swirl into a sphere. The keyword is ‘mind’. Controlling Aster only needs the thought of the caster. Then I have a major advantage in imagination over these people.

I set apart my legs, right foot forward. I connected both my palms by the wrist, then I breathed in, out, and—

“—Hadouken!” I thrust my palms forward.

The white and purple sphere flew forward in light speed, mercilessly tearing the cold wind on its path apart.

Laianne gasped. The tiny ball collided with the trunk. Not too long after, the area of impact had been set ablaze with purple flame. The flames burned the wood to ashes within a second, and the upper part of the tree fell down with a loud rustle and a quake to the ground.

Damn. I always wanted to do that.

A smile escaped me, accompanied by a tinge of electrocuting embarrassment.

“What, what did you just do?” Laianne asked, brows high, eyes wide open, dumbfounded. “And what was that... ‘Ha-do-ken’? Is that a spell chant?”

“... Yeah you can call it that.”

“But... That's out of our lesson...”

“Well, you said it's all about the thought, right?”

“Yes but, but isn't it easier to imagine if you do an honest throw?”

“Not really. Throwing things the normal way is boring, there's no way I can think about a stuff so dull.”

They probably don't even know Ryu, or Ken, or Street Fighter as a whole. But damn was it so satisfying.

That reminds me... There's someone here who might have at least heard of Street Fighter. When I turned to the side, that someone was already looking at me with weirded-out widened blue eyes.

“... Hey.” I waved.

Jana wore the most-loved dark robe, and her blonde hair was still wet and clustered. Her mouth was opened wide, and don't get me started with her stare. I didn't know why but something about her gaze felt like it was judging me for shouting the magic word.

“...” She averted her eyes.

“I can explain... Please.”

---

After that embarrassing scene, Jana refused to talk to me for the whole evening. Alrod came back with a stack of dark red meat cut rectangular, and he roasted it by the fire. Lion wasp meat didn't taste as bad as I thought it would. And no, it didn't taste like chicken cliché. Why does everything need to taste like chicken? It was closer to tuna than anything.

When we were all done eating, Alrod and Jana hit the sack fast, occupying the two tents.

Me and Laianne though, were still up, chatting over the campfire.

“So since I died, day, yesterday, today, tomorrow, all words connected to time of day became nothing but figures of speech?”

“That is so.”

“Talk about an unstable world...”

But then again, Greeks also once believed in Gods that maintained the world. Like Helios and Poseidon.

“That's just how it is.” She shrugged. “You're the creator of Asteria. And all of the worlds belonging to the Nether.”

“Oh? Just heard that right now... So I created not just one?”

She nodded, her eyes invested on the embers of the small campfire.

“But as a ‘Destroyer’, I shouldn't be creating worlds, right?”

“Well, you didn't create worlds on your own. You can treat worlds as offsprings of your fusion with other Goddesses. Though unlike Asteria, all the other worlds in the Nether don't get affected by whatever happens to you.”

“Why is that? Why is Asteria so different?”

“Well... Let's say that a world is a child of you and a specific Goddess. For that world to continue existing, it would need a constant supply of energy, that is you and the Goddess. So even if say, you ceased to exist, no noticeable change will happen to that world because there's still your partner.”

“Okay, I somehow get it. So the world only truly crumbles when both of its parents are dead.”

“Yes...”

“What makes Asteria different from the other worlds I created, then?”

“Asteria, well... You created it on your own. You loved a human so much that you created a world only for your and that human's children.”

“Really? But, didn't I die? Asteria should've exploded then...”

“Well, you didn't really die as in ceased to exist. In all those times that Nariad killed you, she didn't really kill you, it's more like she destroyed one of your aspects, specifically your ethereal aspect. So you still existed, somewhere, in what we call the abyss or the afterlife.”

“Okay... It's really hard to get the subtleties around this God and world and universe thing. So you're saying, as long as I don't become non-existent, Asteria will stand?”

“Yes, but since you're the only parent of Asteria, whatever happens to you is reflected heavily on the world. Like the sky up there.” She looked up and pointed at the groggy black line that separated the two halves of the sky.

“And yes, when the sky, or your divinity is broken, Nariad's blessing does not work since she gave it to you, not to the world.”

You really can't expect a nineteen-year-old to get all these complicated stuff completely.

“Anyway...” She yawned and stretched her arms up. “I think we should sleep.”

“Oh yeah about that, do Gods really need sleep?”

She looked at me, her eyelids desperately lifting themselves. “Not normally, but you're closer to a mortal right now than anything Godly. Come, Lord Alrion. We will be planning our next course of action tomorrow, yes?”

“... Yeah.”

We crept up to the tent, and once we were inside, Laianne began to undress.

---

In the end, I only caught a nap. It's because of space, not because the tent was cramped, it's... Personal space?

Laianne was on my left, sound asleep. Her eyes were shut, obviously, her brows flat, and her thin lips puckered.

She was, again, down to all her naked glory. Though I don't know, maybe the God of Blankets was a pal of mine back in Olympia. He was benevolent enough to make Alrod think of packing up blankets for the journey.

It's not that far, God of Blankets, God of Darkness... Anyway, he's really kind.

Like the last time, Laianne made me her body pillow. Her leg pressing against mine under the blanket, one arm across my chest, her head mounted on my shoulder, and her raven hair tickling my neck.

Don't go there, we didn't do anything. I'm clothed, I checked that first thing.

I heard a rustle outside. Someone, maybe Alrod? I sat up after laying down Laianne's head on her folded robe that she used as a pillow. I put aside the tent's entrance cover, then I crawled out into the open.

It wasn't Alrod, though. It was Jana, hanging out with Danrel who was also awake then. He was pretty lazy though, still lying down, but his amber reptilian eyes, as large as basketballs, were open.

Jana was there, standing by the side of the black dragon's face. I walked up to her, and surprisingly, she spoke first.

“Cute, isn't he...” She said with a warm smile on her face as she rubbed the hardened scale of the dragon.

“Yeah, cute.” I said, though I wasn't really looking at Danrel. I was looking at her face.

It was the first time in this journey that I saw her eyes free from gray clouds. I wonder, is it already okay for me to ask questions?

Just then, before I opened my mouth, she spoke.

“There was a pillar of light.” She said, but she wasn't looking at me.

“... Pillar of light?”

“I'm not sure who you are but, you're not Aren...”

“What... Do you mean?”

“Aren and I were high school then.” She said, her eyes on the past. “We loved each other, so much, so much that I can't find a word to properly describe it.”

“Eh?”

“But one day,” She grimaced. “One day there was that pillar of light that descended from the sky. It engulfed him.

But he didn't die. Not even a scratch. Only when he woke up in the hospital did something happen. He doesn't remember me anymore. He remembered everything and everyone else, just not me.”

“Wait...”

“That's why,” She turned to me, sad emptiness in her gleaming eyes, tears streaming down her face silently.

“That's why I know you're not Arenson. Aren would never forget me. That day, Aren left, and you, whoever you are, you replaced him. I don't know why or how you have his memories, but you're not him.”

“... Then, just who am I?”