Good afternoon, what a wonderful day isn't it?

The sun is shining, the birds are singing and I'm a fucking baby.

Just a week ago I was blowing myself up, and now I'm taking afternoon naps and mid-afternoon naps and late-afternoon naps and dinner time naps and ......And then there's the dawn naps and, and.....

Yeah that's about it.

All I do is sleep and eat, eat and sleep, make some weird noises here and there, cry when I shit myself, eat, then fall back asleep. Not that I particularly hate this kind of life, it's just that the feeling of being a slob and a freeloader make my skin crawl.

At least now I understand what's happening around me now- I was "born" a week ago although I clearly remember myself dying, but I'm still alive so I guess that means either I reincarnated, or I'm just trippin'. Doesn't really take a master detective to deduce that.

That brown haired strong-looking woman sitting over there is my mother, she's been sticking very close to me since birth and never once left my side, taking care of my every need; very devotion, much mother, such close. I love you mum.

Then there's father, a rather thin man with black hair who occasionally comes to check on mother, all he ever seem to accomplish is getting yelled at though. Every single time he talks to mother he gets yelled at, every time he brings food for mother he get yelled at but mother eats it anyway, every time he peeks his head into the room he gets yelled at. Yup, he's a loser. Moving on.

There's the 3 boys who I assume are my brothers, there's the tall one with brown hair, the middle one with black hair, and the shortest one with black hair again. That's all there is to them, well, they do come in and poke me from time to time, other than that? Nothing.

Mother seem to be conversing in a language similar to English, but it isn't really English? I've tried to understand the words she's speaking but I gave up after the 4th day- nothing she said made sense. She's been calling me Catherine though, how does she know my name? Is she a wizard?!

Ahhh, this is really boring, I'll try to fall asleep again.

zzzzzz....

I seriously have no idea how, but time literally just flew by- it's been a little over a year since I'm born now.

Mother began teaching me how to read since I first called her mama 8 months ago, oh the look on her face when i said that, she literally just flipped the fuck out and started swinging me around.

Then I started to walk and this time she flung me into the air, catching me just before I reach the ground and die due mistreatment of an infant. This shit is not fun at all. I seriously wondered how the fuck did my three brothers survived.

So, I am current in Kaine’s village in Gaul, or, as they call it, the North. The people of the North seem to name their village after their village elders because they suck at naming and can’t even name their own children. I jest, but seriously guys? Can’t you think of something better?

Anyway, I am currently sitting on my ass waiting for Mother to come teach me more stuff. I could just pick up a book and start reading on my own, but why read it yourself when someone else can read it for you? Ahh here she comes.

Mother seemed to be running through and the house and shouted:

“Quickly! Bring him to the table. Don't forget his legs!”

*Bam*

She slammed the door open and cleared the table of all the books.

I just continued to sit there on my ass and watch.

Then 3 men came in, 2 of them carried a screaming guy’s torso? The fuck happened to him? The 3rd guy carried what seems to be a pair of legs.

...

What.

The.

Fuck?

“Alright place his legs in the right position.” Mother said while rummaging through the cabinets and shelves in search of something.

“Damn it all, there isn’t any toad poison left. Hold him down and gag his mouth, don’t want him biting his tongue and dying now.”

The three men then did as she said, gaging the poor screaming fellow and holding down both his arms and thighs.

This isn’t some sick murder you’re gonna commit in front of your child right mother? Wait, does she even realise I’m here?

“This is going to hurt very badly, may Sera have mercy on your soul.” Said mother as she held the bloody legs of the man and light started emitting from her hands.

“Just fix his legs back: Heal.”

*Crack* *Squelch* *Snap*

The guy’s leg starts to mend and he is squirming around now, struggling to break free.

“STOP RESISTING” *BAM*

Mother just ripped off his slightly mended leg and slapped that guy with it. He fell unconscious.

What we learn?

Don’t fuck with Mama.

Wait.

Waaaaaait a minute, hold up for a second, did she just heal that guy’s leg by saying a few words?! What sorcery is this?

“MAMA ARE YOU A WIZARD?” i suddenly shouted out.

Mother flipped around and stared at me with a surprised look on her face.

“Katherine?! Why’re you here? Wait, how long have you been here?! And why can you speak so well? Ahhhh nevermind that just get out of here, this is something you shouldn’t see.”

Too late.

I already saw everything.

“What did you just do? You said some words and light came out your hands!” I questioned her whilst she was still trying to fix the guy’s leg.

“That’s magic Katherine, now get out before i slap you with his leg.”

I busted out of there faster than Usain Bolt could sprint a 100 metres.

15 minutes later…

Mother came out of the room looking like a serial killer; Blood all over her, she was holding a bloody knife and for some reason she was smiling.

Wasn’t she trying to save that guy? Why is she holding a knife then?

“Let him stay there till he wakes up, his legs should work just fine now.”

She shouted to the 3 men inside the room.

She then looked at me and said:

“I’m sorry Katherine, were you scared? I’m afraid I can’t read to you today.”

Man fuck reading, I wanna learn how to spew fireballs and shit.

Thus i said:

“Mama, I want to learn magic.”

“Oh you’re interested in magic? I’m afraid you’re too young to use magic now, magic is very dangerous so I’ll teach you when you’re older okay? Unless of course you want to end up like the guy inside there.” Mother said while pointing towards the room.

“I’ll wait till I’m older.”

I don’t want to get slapped with my own leg.

Thus i learnt the existence of magic.

Oh and also that my mum might be a psychopath.

Thanks for reading guys! (And waiting) I’m sorry that it got delayed, I’m prepping for Exams now and my schedule is pretty tight. Anyway hope you guys enjoy this chapter. [th_096_K.gif]

Btw this won’t be 1 girl many guys, don’t worry.