《Jacob WillBreaker》Chapter 19 Voices in my head
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Floating in an empty nothingness all I feel is excruciating pain. The feeling of billions of microscopic needles being pushed through my veins and arteries of my body while my flesh is being devoured by thousands of tiny mouths and my very soul is being torn apart.
I couldn't move my body to express the pain that was devouring my mind, all I could do was stay still as it rampaged inside of me. Suddenly surrounding me are bright colors of gold and blood red with pitch-black swirls and neon purple lighting dancing across it.
The colors flash as they get brighter and brighter and I know on an instinctually level that the golden light is the one harming me as the red mixture tries to fight back.
Coming to this realization I throw my all into trying to help the red light. Turns out I am terrible at fighting without a body so I ‘pushed’ against the golden light with my will as I try to stop it from devouring me. Every time I push it hurts, I felt like stopping once but I felt my rage fuel me to push with everything I have.
Slowly but surely I push the gold light away but the red is dimming. After what feels like days I am victorious as the Gold light disperses leaving me alone with the significantly dimmer red light mixture.
As I drift in the dark I start to see images I believe to be from my past life. I see an odd world with metal carriages without horses and huge buildings made from glass and steel. I watch myself live a boring life as I grow up with my parents before I watch them collapse and burn due to smoke and fire. After losing my parents I was bullied a bit and moved in with my emotionally distant uncle. I met my first love as I helped her with her parent's divorce and studying and she helped me through the death of my parents. Then he cheated on me with one of my bullies just before the exams.
[Guess she didn't need my help anymore so she threw me away.] Then I was eaten alive for a millennia before coming to the world I live in now. I sigh internally "Well, that was depressing. Well despite the fact that they were my memories and that was my past life, that's not who I am anymore. I refused to be used by anyone or be so helpless that the ones I care about die while I can't do anything"
I feel more pain before I bare witness to Fathers pauls memories. Turns Out he was meant to be some sort of hero from another world, but he was weak and hid in the churches and hid his identity as he was slowly brainwashed into the Orders sick twisted puppet.
Now stand facing a much younger looking Paul, as he lived in a similar world to my past self.
I continued to watch as Paul grew up in front of my eyes as his life was sped up then slowed down to show seemingly random clips of his life. I watched as he went to school and learned about his world, numbers the human body and many other things that I did not understand.
I watch as Paul grows up, going through his education as he works so hard and sacrifices so much for letters and numbers on a piece of paper that apparently show his self-worth to those who will pay him so little to do so much work. At some point, Paul gets married and has kids as he works at some sort of office building.
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10 years of random clips of his life later his family dies in a tragic car accident while he was driving. another year passes as it shows a homeless Paul addicted to drugs that he injects into his system as he tries to forget the endless aching pain of loneliness that plagues him. Then one day he falls through an opening in space as he experiences a pull from inside himself and is told that he, along with 99 others are chosen hero’s to rid the world of ‘evil’. But Paul is terrified so he hides his identity as his fellow heroes fight and die around him. Filled with the guilt he is drawn into the church with their promises of redemption and meaning in life. From this point, the memories become even more blurred and distorted until eventually, they stop altogether.
I watched him and myself live a life in another totally alien world but it seemed...boring. All they did was live to work, there was no meaning, The people barely interacted yet still cared so much about how others viewed them. There was just no excitement in the world. Only working, bitterness, corruption, greed, boredom and needless judgment as these people went about their seemingly meaningless lives as they try to follow the countless social and political rules where the common person could never win while the people on top just got more power and fame as they are idolized for being born lucky.
There was no end goal to strive for, their lives were short and meaningless. The guilty walked free while they harmed others and hid behind their money. The people did horrific things for an unknown deity that I am pretty sure does not exist, yet people scream Its name as they kill others and themselves.
A world where depression, self-loathing, sadism, hate and greed were more common than love and loyalty. Where people lived in an unknowing dictatorship of fear and greed.
I, who have been tortured, raped, nearly killed and beaten would still much prefer my homeworld where at least life is interesting and if a person tries hard enough, can live a life they want. There are great wonders that a person can see and experience. Not the pitiful existence that passes as these people's lives as they aimlessly wander.
Once the memories have finished and I have finished thinking I notice that I am alone in a dark void that is seemingly empty of matter and yet full of energy. “Hahahahahaha” [well if the laughing voice inside of my head is any indication I have gone insane.]
“No, you have not gone insane little one…”
[Well, of course, that's what the voice in my head would say.]
“Silence!!!, You amuse me little one but you will not test my patience!” The words cut through me like a scythe through wheat as they demanded silence and respect.
[Ok Mr voice you have my attention, but who and what are you.] “Your conscious would not be able to comprehend the answers to those questions little one so you may continue to call me the voice and think of me as the void of all.” [Ok Mr voice, so um, why are you here? Where is here?]
“I am here little one because you are seemingly the luckiest and unlucky person I have met in a long time. The simultaneous actions of the possession for the powers of order and you being drugged as well as kidnapped has created a situation where you can live and be free whereas if only one happened at a time you would be dead or processed.
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[What?]
You see little one despite your strength and cunning for your age you let your guard down and were poisoned to the extent where you would not have been able to fight off the kidnappers and they would have killed you because of it would have been too difficult to keep you alive. But you were weakened because of the ongoing possession so you were caught instead.
But little one if you were not caught you would not have been drugged, and if you weren't drugged you would have not been in a deep mental state that allowed you to fight off the possession that the so-called father Paul implanted on you unknowingly.”
[But when did he…]” he did it unknowingly when he invaded your mind. His actions against you created guilt, and with that guilt, his mind struggled until a piece of his subconscious that was the Paul before the brainwashing, shattered and went into your mind for shelter. This piece of his mind contained some of his memory which has slowly been leaking out into your mind along with the mind-controlling possession magic that was placed on him in the first place, hence the possession.
[Well damn his life was just one sad story] “That it was little one, his life was ultimately useless from the beginning up until the end and even when he had the chance to change, he hid from the struggles behind those who would use him. Truly a depressing existence."
[Why did my old memories only resurface now?]
"That would be because you removed the influence of the order which was suppressing your old memories and instincts."
[I see.]
"Now little one we must discuss what you are."
[What do you mean what I am? I am a hybrid of a shapeshifter…]
“No, you are not, not anymore. You see little one the gods and devils most mortals see as good and evil are nothing more than the gathering of the energies and laws of reality. There are no Gods or such things as good or evil, Only the laws of reality that take different shapes such as order and chaos, life and death, creation and destruction, the list is endless as it is unfathomable.”
[So if there are no gods or devils then what do people pray to in the churches? there have been answers to some prayers and divine blessings from others. What about the demons? And what are you?]
“The ‘Gods mortals from the churches pray to are angels born from the law of order. They are in a closed-off realm from the mortals and when they are prayed to it strengths them and sometimes they let that strength go back to the person who prayed, as a type of advertisement or investment for future power. The demons are the angles natural opposites, beings born and made from the laws of chaos. As for me, the easiest way for you to comprehend is if I tell you I am the closest thing to a God this reality knows. I am Void, the infinite expanse of nothing and everything simultaneously. All energy and laws are born from my existence as I encompassed all that is and isn't as well as all that can and will happen.”
[Ok don't fuck with the void, got it. Now could you tell me what you mean by closed realm?]
“So many questions little one, but I will indulge your curiosity. When the words were born some, like Paul, were without magic or other supernatural energies, but those that that had the power had to have a balance. Your world, when it was born was one of those that had a perfect balance between the laws of chaos and order as well as others. That was until the angles lied and built a persona around being the gods of good and righteousness. They brainwashed the mortals against the Demons, the beings of chaos while forcing them to pray to their fake pantheon as their prayers put them under the control of the angel and in turn brings them more order to the world.
Once the Demons were defeated they were sealed away in a closed realm now called hell. The mortals rejoiced with the defeated ‘evil’. But without chaos, there was no choice, no free will, no evolution, no change. The world had too much order and it was dying due to the unbalance. Once the angels realized this they created a device that takes control of people's minds and they planted false chaos as they sealed themselves away in a closed realm filled to the brim with luxury and comfort. With this they still have control and the world will stabilize as it reaches a false balance. Once the false balance is reached the angels will return and they will have complete control over the world.
But I digress little one, the topic is what you are now. The failed possession destroyed all sense of order and chaos inside of you. But being the creature that you are there are no other laws inside of you. Normally I would take control of a creature in this situation for my amusement. But your very nature and strength is to have complete control of your existence so taking control of you would have accomplished nothing as your unique power would leave along with the control you have over yourself.
That leaves you with the power of the void in a body of a unique and powerful creature. This should not be allowed but I have a use for you which helps with taking your revenge. If you were to destroy the church and reopen the gates of hell it would return the world to balance and let you become a free creature with its revenge. I can't continue to call your creature so I will just call you Jacob. So how about it Jacob do you agree to help save the world by bringing chaos and destruction?”
[Well you put it like that how could I refuse? but do you have any advice on how to do this? wait, wait don't tell me, It will be more fun that way. But I do need to know the time frame] “HAHAHAHA good, good I agree with your choices, You have A thousand years until the angels will return.
But know this by destroying the laws inside of you, you have absorbed more energy than any normal person your age should, In doing this it would normally kill a person but you are different from normal people as you know. In absorbing this energy you have shortened the time needed to gain your powers to half a year from now.
Now, Jacob, I shall send you on your way I grow bored of talking to you, bye” Without even being able to reply I am sent out of the void and into my slowly waking body. [Well that was a lot to take in, but at least now I get to see what I can do with the surrounding slavers, so that should be fun.]
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POV of unknown
As the last of my gathered power leaves me my consciousness returns to the chained cage.
[Looks like the little freak brought it. It appears that being a chosen one and a hero doesn't make him any less on an idiot, but to worry soon I will take your place and show the world what I can really do.]
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