《Time & Tied》Part 33b: Julie's Secret 2
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TIME & TIED: ESCALATION
ARC 2.2 - To the Future
PART 33b: JULIE’S SECRET 2
At the least, whatever response Corry had been expecting, Julie supposed it hadn’t been that. The redhead glanced around the area briefly, perhaps wondering whether he'd come to the right table. "You... you wanted to have your network of deceit exposed to the entire school?" he said, incredulous.
Julie shrugged. “When you put it that way, no," she admitted. "However, what's done is done. So you win. Though I will say that when you calculated out the number of my voluntary followers on that flyer? You overestimated by about five percent." She placed a forkful of salad into her mouth.
Corry's eyebrow twitched. "You're planning something. You already have retaliation in mind. What’s your game, LaMille?"
"On the contrary," Julie said, swallowing. She raised her voice. “Let me once again make it clear to EVERYONE here that any action of vengeance taken against Corry today? Will result in me giving out a punishment of MY OWN. And trust me, you do NOT want that.” Heck, she even had the power to give suspensions today - though she probably wouldn’t use it.
“Yeah, because you want to deal with this yourself,” Corry deduced. "But it's too late! Some of your more embittered followers are already massing together to take you down, now that they know they're not alone.”
"Let them come," Julie countered. “It can't happen overnight. They’ll need at least a few days to get themselves organized."
"And you're not concerned about that?"
"I have what I want. The rest doesn't matter."
Corry's jawline tightened. "What the hell, LaMille?" The plastic fork in his hand snapped in half. "How could this POSSIBLY have given you what you want??"
Julie poked at her salad. "It's like I told you in Grade Nine, at the very beginning of all this, Corry. Our motivations are fundamentally different. Now, if you don't mind, I'm eating my lunch."
Corry jabbed a finger at her and seemed about to reply to that, until it presumably occurred to him that there wasn't much he could say without looking like the bad guy. He settled for a "Damn you!", after which he threw the remains of his fork towards her and stalked off.
Julie belatedly found herself hoping Corry wouldn't do anything more drastic now, on account of her subdued reaction. It's not like she was acting that way out of spite.
Oh well. Even if he did something tomorrow - she still had today.
***
"Jewels, wait up!"
Julie turned to see Clarke approaching. The day was over, so there was still time to run out the school doors, to avoid him again... no. That felt cowardly. She was no coward.
“H-Hi Phil," she said, greeting him with a hesitant smile as he ran up to her.
"Jewels... what's going ON?” Clarke asked. "I mean, I’ve spent the day trying to figure this all out but... but I got nothing. Is what Corry says in here true?" He held up one of the flyers.
Julie nodded. “It is,” she admitted, straightening her posture. "I have bribed. I have blackmailed. I have tried to keep this from people. From you most of all, actually."
Clarke shook his head. "But... but WHY, Jewels? I mean, I always knew you did things your own way but THIS? This is... well... now I'm not sure what to believe about you any more.”
Julie felt her heart sink. "You're disappointed."
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Clarke ran a hand back through his hair. "I'm confused. You've put so much effort into keeping your past quiet. Whenever I've asked, you've pushed me away. Yet now that it's all come out here... you don't seem to care at all." He paused, visibly frustrated. "So, if this didn't matter to you, why didn't you tell me about it in the first place? Merely because you thought I’d hate you for it?”
Julie looked up at the blonde boy, the one person who was perhaps the closest she’d ever come to having to a friend, the one who had not only stuck by her through all of this, but had even tried to UNDERSTAND her. No one had ever done that for her before. No one.
She couldn’t push him away any more. "Come with me,” she said, tugging at his arm.
"What?"
“Come," Julie repeated, leading Clarke back into an abandoned classroom. She didn't speak again until after checking to ensure that they were alone. "Phil, it's not that it didn't matter," she explained. "It's simply that, as of this morning, the whole situation changed."
"Situation?" Clarke wondered. Julie pulled the precious paper out from underneath her sweater and handed it over to him. He unfolded it, and gave the document a quick scan. His eyes widened. "Hunt authorized you to run the school today?"
"Provisionally, yes."
Clarke looked back up. "That's why you got called down to the office so many times.” Julie nodded. "Thank goodness," he sighed. "I thought that somehow you were getting into worse and worse trouble."
"Because of Corry's flyer?" Julie clucked her tongue. "Phil, you should know better. As devastating as it is, it's all supposition and circumstantial evidence. No one’s even named in it, except for that Tracy.”
“Which won’t stop people from coming after you - perhaps with good reason.” Clarke glanced back down at the document he held. “Are you hoping this agreement with Mr. Hunt is going to protect you somehow? Because I don’t see--"
“No,” Julie said, shaking her head. She held out her hand, and he returned the sheet to her. “This agreement is for a more... personal matter, separate from Corry.”
Clarke leaned in closer, staring at her. “You're still holding something back," he realized. "Jewels... Julie... please. Tell me.”
"I..." Julie felt her throat go dry. She wanted to tell him. To tell someone who knew her, before she would be forced to spill all about her life to some counsellor who was liable to completely misunderstand. Yet even so, the words wouldn’t come. "I... c-can’t..."
Clarke stared at her for another long moment. "Then I don't know what to do," he said at last. "I want to help you. I've always wanted to help you. You know that. I've also believed that, deep down, you weren't a bad person. That you weren’t using people. That you weren't using me."
He turned away. Julie found her breaths becoming shallower. “But now?” he continued. “Julie, I’m at a loss. Maybe Corry's right after all. Maybe the only person who ever mattered to Julie LaMille was Julie LaMille. And if that's true, then... then she sure doesn't need me hanging around her any more.”
“No!” Julie gasped. Clarke didn’t turn back. But he didn’t walk away.
She swallowed again, yet somehow her throat was still dry. "Phil, don't be like that," she pleaded. She didn’t understand why this conversation hurt so much. Because they were breaking up? Had they ever truly been together?
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"Then tell me," Clarke said, turning back to her.
Fine. My parents. “My..." Two words. Not hard. “My..." Julie felt a tear forming and she wiped her palm over her eyes. “It’s my..." Julie shook her head. “God Phil, I CAN’T, okay?” She spun to face the chalkboard. “I’m sorry. Just break up with me already and go.” He was too damn good for the likes of her anyway.
She expected him to sigh in resignation and walk away. And she heard him take a step. But even as she realized he was moving closer, Clarke was pulling her into an embrace from behind. “Jewels, even if I assume we’re going out, I would never break up with you on your birthday,” he murmured near her ear. “So if you need any assistance, anything at all... I’m still here for you. At least for now. The flyer doesn’t change that.”
Julie felt her legs go weak, and for the second time today, it took all of her willpower to keep her emotions in check. This didn’t make any logical sense. “Phil, no,” she protested. "How can you possibly still be so nice to me? After everything I've done?”
Clarke lowered his chin to her shoulder. "Maybe I'm a glutton for punishment," he replied. “Or too naive to understand how bad things really are. But honestly... I’ve seen you smile. And I still think that deep down, you're not half as bad as you think you are. Not really."
Julie turned, and she found her own arms encircling Clarke as he straightened, and she rested her own head upon his shoulder. The silence that followed his comment seemed to stretch on for an eternity. It might have been seconds, or hours, Julie didn't know. However, once the words started to spill out of her mouth, she found that she couldn't stop them.
"It's my p-parents, Phil," she admitted, a lump forming in her throat. "They don't love me, you see. They never have. Never even wanted me. My mom, she hates me, and my dad, he wanted a son. And as their only child, they've never, ever let me forget that."
***
Clarke pulled back slightly in order to look Julie in the eyes. He searched them for any hint of deceit, and found none. "Did you just say what I think you said?"
Julie looked up at him. She didn’t speak, only bit into her lower lip. His first instinct was to say she must be misinterpreting things, that no one’s parents could be that mean, but she looked so earnest. Then he remembered something.
"You mean to tell me that, the time you were told you were insignificant... and that you would never amount to anything... it was your parents who said it?"
Julie managed a small shrug. "Yeah, well. That's life."
“Like hell it is,” Clarke countered. "My God, Julie, why haven't you ever mentioned this?"
"You've met my parents," she reminded him. "During the summers and on the few other occasions they've visited. Did you ever get the impression that they didn't care for me? Or that they’d sent me away, so that they didn’t have to deal with me in person?"
"I... well... no," Clarke admitted.
"Exactly. It's like they have two faces, you see. The one they present to the public, and the one they present to me. So no one else ever gets to see how they really feel." She smiled then, but it was a sad smile. "Come to think, maybe that deception is a trait I get from them, I don't know. Still, it's why I can't stand anyone talking to me about my parents. On some level, their fakery disgusts me."
"We have to do something about this then," Clarke decided. "Talk to a counsellor, or child services or something.”
"And tell them what?" Julie asked. She shook her head. "My parents don't physically abuse me. And you can’t prove a case of my word against theirs. Anyway, it's not their fault. It's mine."
Clarke felt a knot forming in his stomach. "Jewels, no."
"I've been a major disappointment from the beginning. Not the sort of person who could carry on the LaMille family line. As a child, I was weak and helpless in the face of confrontation. I even sucked my thumb until I was three years old. But I've been working hard over the years. And now, at long last, I've had an entire school and faculty under my control.”
She clenched her fist. “My parents will have to acknowledge me now. They thought it couldn't be done. That a girl like me could never accomplish anything. But I did it. This PROVES that I’m worthy! So finally, it will be okay. It will all be okay." Julie smiled, and the smile was sincere, and Clarke couldn’t bear it.
"Oh God, I never knew," Clarke choked out. "I never even suspected. I'm so, so sorry, Jewels. Can you ever forgive me?"
She looked back up. "Forgive you? Phil, what are you talking about? Why are you crying?"
He reached up, only now discovering that his cheeks were wet. "I... I can't help it, Jewels. I love you, and I hate seeing what you've become on account of your parents.” He pulled her close once more, and Julie hugged him back. Again, there was silence.
"Phil?" Julie ventured at last. "You mustn't tell anyone else what I've told you. Okay? NOBODY. Promise me that."
"Jewels... oh God, don’t ask that..."
"No one, Phil. Please. PLEASE," Julie insisted quietly, her hug becoming something of a death grip. “Because no one will believe you. You’d only get in trouble. It’s all going to be okay after tonight anyway. Now that I have the agreement.”
“What do you-- your parents are back in town, aren't they,” he realized. Julie nodded. Clarke set his jaw. “I’m going home with you. You don't have to face them alone."
"No. You can’t,” Julie pleaded. “With you there, they'll go all fake again. But don’t worry, Phil! As long as I have the principal's signature on that paper, it'll be okay."
Clarke swallowed. "Right," he said. He squeezed her a bit tighter before pulling back. “Look, I won’t say anything for now, but this conversation isn’t over yet, okay? I’m going to call you tonight.”
He reached into his pocket and pulled out a small, neatly wrapped package. “In the meantime, here's something to remember me. Happy birthday.”
Julie smiled again, and he felt his heart breaking. "Thanks, Phil. For remembering... and for everything these last couple years, I suppose."
He shook his head in awe. “You are SO strong, Julie. Stronger than I realized. Just remember, there are people out here who love you, okay? We’ll talk more later tonight."
"Sure we will,” Julie agreed. "I'm looking forward to it already."
They didn't speak again that day.
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