Chapter 16 – Food, Salt, Kaz

“Food stalls, food stalls.” I looked around, following the sweet, tangy, and spicy scents of cooking.

There was plenty to see, plenty to buy, and even more to be haggled over, but I wanted food first and foremost.

Finally, after walking for what felt like forever, I found the food stalls.

An entire market row of sizzling, chopping, yelling, hawking, and boiling, just waiting to be consumed.

“Over here, good sir! The finest cuts of banelamb you’ll ever try!” One stall owner called out to me.

“But try the moo meat first!” Another called over, competing with the first.

“Just try some, please!” The first said, louder still.

I waved a dismissive hand in the air at both of them and continued down the row of stalls, listening to people haggle over food.

There was seafood, boiled food, fried food, food on a stick, and just about any other kind of food you could imagine.

However, I saw a stall down towards the end that had nobody standing in front of it. In fact, it was separated from the other stalls by a good distance, and people who were walking by it gave it a wide berth.

“I wonder what that’s about?” I asked Leese’s Avatar, but she simply shrugged and continued to sit on my shoulder.

I walked up to the stall and looked over the food offerings. Everything looked amazingly delicious, so why weren’t people eating here?

“Hello!?” I called into the stall, where a curtain hung between me and the cookpots in the back.

“Oh, Kaz will be with you in just a minute!” A deep, garbled voice called from the back.

“Okay, no problem.” I said, raising an eyebrow at all of the food.

Everything was priced extremely cheap too, as low as a few coins for entire bowls of stew. Food prices in the Guild City were never this low.

I continued to stare at the food offerings, my mouth beginning to water as a result of all of the savory and spicy scents.

“Hi, what would you like?” The voice asked, now coming from a rather large body towering over me.

I looked up and first noticed blue skin, then ropey, muscled arms, followed by a chef’s apron that was stained beyond belief.

Finally, I saw teeth hanging out of a misshapen mouth, attached to a large, squared-off jaw and an enormous head.

The owner of the stall was a troll. A real live troll.

I took a deep breath and almost shot fire at him, but managed to curb my concern.

“You’re a fuckin’ troll.” I said, breathing out slowly.

“Kaz is a troll, yes.” He said, his big toothy grin splitting his face.

“And you run a food stall.” I was still dealing with disbelief at this point.

“Yes, is called ‘For Salt’. It’s a good name, yes?” His smile only widened.

“So, why does nobody buy your food?” I looked around at the completely empty street surrounding his stall.

“Kaz does not know. Priced food low, made food delicious. Gave stall good name. Cannot tell reason for no customers. You are first, so you get special food!” Kaz said, ducking back behind the curtain.

“Uh, that won’t be necessary.” I tried to wave him off, but he had already disappeared.

“No, no, you are first customer, you get special stew.” Kaz called out from behind the curtain.

“Alright.” I sat on a small stool that had been set up in front of the wooden bar where a series of metal flatware had been placed.

I inspected the flatware, which was crude, and poorly made, but effective nonetheless. It almost looked handmade, as though this Kaz had made them himself.

“Almost ready.” He called out from the back of the kitchen.

The smells that were coming from the kitchen were intensely delicious, and I found myself almost unable to stand the waiting for the food.

The sounds of sizzling, boiling, and raging fire erupted from the back, then steam and smoke came from the curtains as Kaz walked out with a huge bowl of stew that was as big as my head.

“House special, Grimfrost Stew, made from leg of Grimfrost ram and bone stock, with starchy vegetables to enhance flavor profile.” Kaz sat the bowl in front of me and the smell was almost too much to handle.

Along with the bowl of stew came a large hunk of hollowed out bread, a trencher that I hadn’t seen in a long while. The last time I’d had homemade stew with a trencher was back when I was a child and my father was still at home. Before the fire, before the Guild.

Pushing away the dark thoughts that ravaged my memories, I instead dunked the trencher into the stew and took a large bite.

The flavors exploded in my mouth like a dancing flame, dazzling my senses and sending my mind to a place of comfort, warmth, and safety.

I couldn’t help but eat the entire bowl, along with the trencher, which Kaz brought more than one of for me.

“Kaz, why does nobody eat at your stall? This is amazing!” I said between mouthfuls of stew and bread.

“People are afraid of Kaz. Kaz is big, and is a troll, so it’s hard to get customers to accept good food and cooking when Kaz is Kaz.” He said, a sadness taking over his features.

“I mean, I ate here, and I’m a Wizard, so…” I nodded to the bowl that was now empty. “I can’t complain, not at all.”

“Kaz once knew a Warlock, which is sort of the same as a Wizard, yes? His name was Roark, he was a rude guy, but also a good man at the same time. He made Kaz who Kaz is today.” Kaz thumped his chest proudly.

“Roark, eh? He sounds like a pretty decent guy. A shame he wasn’t a Wizard.” I said, shaking my head.

“Roark was a good friend, then he went away. He offered to take Kaz with him, but Kaz had other plans. Kaz wanted to open a new store, make good food and lovely offerings for lots of people. This place seemed as good as any, so Kaz set up shop.” Kaz motioned to the shop as a whole.

“Well, you’re doing pretty good. I’ll spread the word that your food is top notch, maybe drum up some business for you.” I gave Kaz a smile, the best I could afford which wasn’t much of one, then excused myself to head to the other sides of the markets.

“See you later, Kaz. I’ll definitely stop by again for some of that stew.” I said, waving.

“Kaz will look forward to the visit!” Kaz waved back and I stepped away from the stall, heading toward the market proper.

“Skill books, spell books, weapons and armor…” I muttered to myself as I looked over the wares that each stall was offering.

Some had books, some had potions and lotions, others had various runic accoutrements. None of them, though, had what I was really after. Something to help me become a better Dungeon Lord. And also raw food ingredients I could store for long-term use.

“Oh, wait.” I said, perusing a stall with various books. I found one that was titled For Salt! Fantastically Themed Food for your Facehole!

Wonder of wonders, it was written by Kaz himself. He did cook amazing things, and if any of his recipes were in this book, I wanted to try to make them.

“Hey, how much for this?” I held up the hefty, leather-bound tome in one hand and waved it at the person who was watching the stall.

“Oh, that tripe? Just a gold.” He rolled his eyes and held out his hand for my money.

“Seriously, have you tried any of Kaz’s food?” I asked, handing him the coin.

He quickly snatched the coin and dropped it into a box on the countertop.

“No, why in the Underneath would I want to try food that a Troll made? Ugh.” Another eye roll, another dismissive response.

“You realize you’re a dick, right?” I asked, annoyed at the stall owner.

“You realize I don’t give a shit, right? Now get moving, there are other people who want to buy books.” He said, though when I looked around there was nobody in line to buy books.

“Asshole.” I muttered as I walked away from the stall.

“You need to be more careful.” Leese said into my ear, her little Avatar still sitting on my shoulder.

“Why? He was a total prick? I could have burned down his entire shop in less than a minute and been halfway back to the dungeon before the guards could be summoned.” I shook my head at the entire situation.

“Sure, but what would that accomplish?” Leese asked.

“Nothing, aside from making me feel better and getting his head out of the clouds.” I replied before poking my head into the door of an armor shop.

“How much gold do we have?” I asked Leese as I wandered into the building, staring at all of the incredibly well-made armors that were on display.

“Not enough for anything here.” Leese shook her head and lifted off of my shoulder, fluttering around the shop. “It’s all very pretty and exceptionally well crafted, though.”

“Good morning.” A gentle voice called from the back end of the store, where the counter would have been.

“Hello there.” I said, continuing to look about.

“Looking for something specific? Holy crap, you’re a Wizard.” A brawny man, a head and shoulders taller than me, and about as wide, with dark skin and various white-inked tattoos, leaned out from behind a shelf and stared at me with wife eyes.

“How did you know?” I looked at myself, not noting anything particularly Wizardly about me.

“I can tell, I have Class Sight, tells me what class someone is at a glance. Very helpful when someone wants to buy armor and they’re not entirely sure what the best fit is.” The man said. “Not many Wizards, though. Mostly Knights, Paladins, or Thieves here.”

“You service Thieves, eh?” I raised an eyebrow at the man.

“Haha, did I say that? I meant to say Rogues and their ilk. Yep, no Thieves. Not in this city.” The man looked to the side shiftily. “Look, just pretend I didn’t say that, yeah?”

“I’m not exactly in the business of good things either, there buddy.” I said, looking at some leather armor that had runic spirals and a green metallic filigree on the seams.

“You fancy that set?” He asked, stepping over and pulling the piece off of the rack for me.

“Yeah, but I hate to know how much it’s going to cost me.” I held the chest plate for the armor in my hands and examined it.

>>>

Leather Chestplate of Arcane Might

Armor Type: Light

Armor Slot: Chest

Armor Class: Epic

Physical Armor Rating: 18

Magical Resistance Rating: 30

Effect: Enhances Magical Damage Output from all sources by 25%

Effect 2: Arcane Multicast

Arcane Multicast: 5% chance to replicate the last spell you cast, dealing 50% of the original spell’s damage and costing no MP. This ability cannot trigger more than once every 30 seconds.

Double Bubble Toil and Trouble, This Spell I Cast Will Be For Double! Kapow! ~Old Children’s Game

>>>

“Is the entire set enchanted like this?” I asked, my eyes going wide as I looked at the bonuses.

“Yep, made them myself. That’s what the Mythrile is that’s been woven into the seams there.” The man ran his fingers along the filigree and it sparkled a deep green at his touch.

“That’s incredible. Alright, how much?” I asked, wanting to know, but also not wanting to know.

“For the full set? Gloves, Boots, Leggings, Spaulders, Helmet, Chest plate, Bracers? Umm, twenty-three hundred gold.” The man scratched at his chin as he did the mental math and gave me the price.

“You’re shitting me.” I handed him the Chest Plate back and put my hand up.

“I am not, no. But, there is something you could do for me that requires a more discerning kind of individual that would help me bring the price down.” He said, a wry smile crossing his face.

“How much would it bring the suit down?” I gave him a stern look.

“Right to the chase, eh? I could probably bring it down fifty percent for the whole thing.” He explained, scratching at the side of his bald head this time.

“I don’t do business for people I don’t know the name of.” I crossed my arms over my chest and leaned back into my stance.

“Hauberk.” He said with a smile.

“Like the chest piece?” I had to keep myself from grinning at the ridiculousness of the man’s name.

“Yeah, why? I’m an armorer, my father was an armorer, my grand father was an armorer, we have names that follow the armorer tradition.” Hauberk rolled his hand in the air.

“Alright Hauberk, I’m Grimm. What do you need done?” I asked, curious about the new job.

“I need someone taken care of.” Hauberk lowered his voice and leaned closer to me.

“What.” I sighed, knowing where this conversation was headed.

“I need you to find someone and take care of them.” He repeated.

“Like, murder? I mean, I’m not terribly opposed, especially if the reason is good and the pay is right, but seriously? I need back story.” I leaned closer, to the point where our foreheads were almost touching.

“The back story is that she’s my grandmother, and she needs to be taken care of for a couple days. I’m not asking you to murder anyone, just to keep her safe while I finish up some of the work I’ve got piled up.” Hauberk said with a shrewd smile.

“Oh, Underneath, no. I don’t babysit.” I physically recoiled from Hauberk at the very thought of watching someone’s grandmother.

“No, no, don’t worry about that. I just want to make sure she doesn’t get hurt while she’s working.” Hauberk explained with a slight frown on his face.

“Okay, but you’re bringing the price down by seventy-five percent.” I said, haggling as hard as I knew how to.

Haggling never worked in a Guild-held City, because the Guild manufactured all of the goods, and all prices were firm. But I had known the skill for a long time, and I wanted to test it out.

“I don’t think so, pal. How about sixty percent off.” Hauberk raised an eyebrow at me.

“Seventy.” I raised an eyebrow back and him and crossed my arms over my chest.

“Sixty-three and one third percent, Grimm.” Haubker folded his massive arms over his burly chest, mimicking my motion.

“Sixty-six percent, or I won’t bother with your old coot.” I snapped, bringing the negotiations to a psychological end.

“Fine, deal. Sixty-six percent off when you finish the job. That’ll bring the entire armor set to seven-hundred eighty-two gold, and I won’t even make a damned profit.” Hauberk sighed and stuck his hand out in front of me.

I wasn’t really sure what to do here. I had just out-haggled a very large armorer for more than just a piece of equipment. It was an entire bloody set of high-quality armor.

“So, you going to take the job?” Hauberk asked, and a mission notification popped up in front of my face, partially obscuring Hauberk.

>>>

Mission: Taking Care of Cuirass

Status: Active (Offered)

Objective: Find Cuirass, Hauberk’s Grandmother, and watch over her for three days, ensuring that she doesn’t hurt herself while she works.

Secondary Objective: Take excellent care of Cuirass, providing for her needs and entertaining her for the duration of her time with you.

Bonus Objective: (SECRET)

Expected Payout: 1,200 Gold

EXP Payout: 22,500

Bonus Reward: 66% Reduction in the “Arcane Armor” Leather Armor set

Time Allowed: 72 Hours (Paused)

Job Restriction: Grimm Darkfyre Only

>>>

“Alright, I accept your offer.” I should Hauberk’s incredibly large hand and sealed the deal.

“Alright, just remember: You have to keep her safe for a full seventy-two hours so I can get caught up on a backlog here. I’ll collect her from you at the end of the period. Now, where are you planning on housing her?” Hauberk opened his hand questioningly.

“What do you mean? Isn’t she just going to stay at home?” I already didn’t like the way this was going.

“No, you have to keep her with you. As in, wherever you are, she also needs to be, and vice versa.” Hauberk explained.

“Oh, I didn’t see that in the mission details.” I sighed.

“Not everything will be shown clearly in those. You should know that by now. What are you, a Guilder?” Hauberk laughed at me, but I just let it go.

“Actually, I was, yeah.” I said, which shut him up.

“My mistake.” His face changed from laughter to concern very quickly. “You’re not going to set my store on fire, are you?”

“No, now tell me where your grandmother is, so I can get on with this ridiculous mission.” I demanded.

After I told Hauberk where to find my Dungeon, he explained how to find his grandmother, who lived in the city noble’s district. She was older, but still strong enough to swing a hammer and forge steel, which was something I wanted to see with my own eyes.

I traveled through the city streets, following Hauberk’s directions and finally landed in the Noble’s quarter, where a guard stopped me.

“Papers.” There was no question in his voice, it was very demanding.

“I don’t have any, I’m here to see Cuirass Van Hammerstang, of the Hammerstangs.” Saying her entire name was tedious.

“Right, word was sent. Third house on the left. You’ll know it from the flames, the heat, and the stink of molten metal.” The guard stamped the butt of his spear into the ground and the gate that lead into the Noble’s Quarter opened.

“Slick.” I said, walking through the gate and finding the house the guard had mentioned.

“Damnit all, another wasted piece of slag!” A shout came from inside the house.

The guard was right, it did smell of molten metal, and the heat pouring from the open windows was considerable.

“Cuirass?” I called into the house, but I didn’t get anything more than the sound of metal pounding on metal. “Hello!?”

A woman with long white hair that was tied back behind her head, deeply red, calloused hands, and a sweat-stained apron covering her chest threw the door open.

“Whaddya want?” She said, looking at me over tinted spectacles that sat on the bridge of her nose.

“I’m Grimm Darkfyre, I’m here to see you don’t get injured while you’re working. Gather your things, we’re heading to my Dungeon.” I said. “Your grandson Hauberk sent me.”

“No.” She slammed the door in my face and the hammering continued.

“Well, this is going to be fun.” I said to the Avatar of Leese sitting on my shoulder.

She nodded with a sad smile.