“I have a question,” said Ishad, the next day, as he and Mai rode in the carriage. “Why do you think Asan Paril will be such a safe haven?”

The question had struck Mai at an awkward moment, a moment when she had been thinking about the past, not the future. “Um,” she said. “Why? Asan Paril is known for its neutrality. It is the only city in the world that is not allied with any House.” She looked at Ishad. “But you probably knew that.”

“I did,” said Ishad. “But, it sounds like you have a second reason. Continue.”

“Um…I met the city’s lord, several times,” said Mai. “His name is Tur is Ashat. He frequented the Occluded City often. We were friends, of a sort.”

“Friends?” asked Ishad. “Forgive me for asking, Mai, but how often did you see him?”

“Perhaps twice a year,” said Mai. “But…I know he was my friend. He was the only person to ever stand up to my father for me…” She trailed off, and put her hand to her mouth. “I fear I have said too much.”

“You think it was a deep dark secret that your father abused you?” asked Ishad. “It’s not. You wear what was done to you on your sleeve, Mai. When his name comes up in conversation, you don’t get sad. You often seem to think that everything is your fault, and you are eager to please.”

Mai looked at Ishad, horrified that he knew.

But Ishad continued. “You don’t have to worry, though,” he said. “I think no less of you. How could I? It is your father who should toss and turn in the afterlife.”

“You think I’m a weakling,” said Mai. A horrible, terrible thought came to her, that Ishad only cared for her out of pity. That couldn’t be true. But what if it was?

“I do not think you’re a weakling,” said Ishad. “I think you bear mental scars. But so do I. Do you think it was just out of the blue that my parents decided I was possessed, and sent me off to become a monk? I was always the most talented of their three sons, and they hated that, as I was also the youngest. My parents didn’t want to think that by passing their company on to their eldest, Vi, who barely even wanted the job, they were making a bad decision. All my life, they came up with ways to tell me that my talents were a sham. The last way they did that was, of course, telling me I was possessed, and sending me off to become a monk, but there were many things they did before that.”

Mai stared at Ishad. “What you just told me was very personal, wasn’t it?” she said. “I…I didn’t need to hear.”

“I needed to tell someone,” said Ishad. “No one knew, except for my parents, and my siblings, who after a time, came to support them. I felt too ashamed to make my friends aware that my parents were trying to make me feel my gifts were a curse. I have now bequeathed that secret to you. Treat it well.”

It was hard for Mai to say which reached for the other first, but a moment later, they were hugging. Hugging quite tightly.

Perhaps a few minutes later, they broke apart.

“You got me thinking,” said Mai, to Ishad, as she settled back into her seat.

“About what?” asked Ishad.

“What could have happened to Broken, to make him act the way he does?” asked Mai. “If we are both products of the way we grew up, what must have happened to Broken?”

“Something horrible,” said Ishad.

“Obviously,” said Mai.

And from that word, she began to think. Broken was on her mind too often as of late, but she couldn’t help it.

An hour or so later, she decided she had to speak with him once more.

That night, they stopped at a barren plot of land, a field in the middle of nowhere. As they stopped, Claw-Back flew off to do whatever an owl did. They ate, and they spared for a little. With no apology, Broken deemed that night, Ishad was healed enough to take the second sword, and so he did.

Later that night, when Ishad was asleep on the grass, and Mai and Broken were nearby, slowly getting to sleep, Mai sat up.

Of course, Broken did so immediately as well, as was his nature.

“I have to talk to you,” said Mai, as Ishad lightly snored in the background. She continued. “What has happen between us, all the different times I was angry at you, all that is too complicated to deal with. So let’s just forget it. If Ishad can forgive you for what you did to him, perhaps I can, as well.”

“What do you wish to speak to me about?” asked Broken.

“Life,” said Mai. “Yours, in particular. I want to know why you never share anything. I want to know why you’re always so cryptic.”

“Did I not hint at one of my secrets?” asked Broken.

“I remember full well you said that you were in your rights to kill me,” said Mai. “I would be mad if I forgot. I don’t want to know about your deep dark secrets. I just want to know something. Ishad thinks you might be a former Tachen assassin. Is that true?”

“No,” said Broken, quite flatly. “But, because you asked, I wish to show you something.”

Before Mai could respond, Broken pulled off his shirt. It was odd, but Mai couldn’t remember seeing him shirtless before.

But then, under the light of the stars, she saw what he had been hiding.

He had a tattoo, on the upper part of his right arm. The tattoo completely covered the region, from shoulder to wrist, and wrapped all around. It was of a serpent biting its own tail.

Most tattoos were just that: tattoos. They stood for nothing. But there were harsh punishments of death, that restricted tattoos of the Symbol to nobles, and nobles alone.

Mai could not believe it, at first. Broken was a noble. “My God she said. You… But I thought you were a commoner. You told me…”

“I lead you to believe as much,” said Broken. “But I never said it.”

“Your name…” said Mai. “Broken can’t be your name. No noble would name their child as much.”

“Indeed,” said Broken. “My name is assumed. But one of those deep, dark secrets forbids me from telling you why.”

“Why didn’t you tell me this earlier?” asked Mai.

“Because I wanted you to believe I was a commoner,” said Broken. “That way, there would be no awkward questions about which House I was from, and to who I held my allegiance.”

Those questions, however, were even now coming to the forefront of Mai’s mind. “Can you answer them now?” she asked.

“No,” said Broken. “For the same reason as before. If I told you my House, it would take you one step closer to finding out who I am. And you finding out who I really am is something I cannot have, not yet.”

“But why?” asked Mai.

“Again, that is another question I cannot answer,” said Broken. His gray eyes stared at her. “But I will tell you this much. You know my name.”

“Why can’t you just say it?” asked Mai. “You can say nothing that will make me think any worse of you.”

“I highly doubt that,” said Broken.

“You told me you could kill me, by rights,” said Mai, “and I just took it. Now, you prove to me that you are a noble, and I accept that, as well.”

“But the secrets I withhold, I withhold because they are the worst,” said Broken. The way he said it, Mai found herself believing him.

But she also wanted to know. She had to know. And tonight, Broken had proven that he could be pushed into revealing things. “What if I swear to you, that no matter what you said, I would act no differently around you then I do now, and tell no one of your secrets, not even Ishad.”

“That would still not be enough. My full story is long and convoluted, and you would wind up latching onto the wrong parts.”

Mai sensed it was time for her to back off. “I understand,” she said, though in reality, she did not. “I won’t pry.”

“I told you what I told you this night because I believe you have a right to know,” said Broken. “And I feel I have been rather hard, as of late.”

“Is that the closest thing to an apology about Ishad that I’ll get from you?” asked Mai.

“Most likely,” Broken responded. He looked truly sad then, as the stars shone around them, and Mai thought she saw a single tear drip from his cheek. But that was impossible. Broken didn’t cry.

“Are you alright?” Mai asked.

“Of course not,” said Broken, putting his shirt back on. “But there is nothing you can do to help.”

Rather stunned that when she had approached Broken this time, he had actually opened up, to a degree, Mai lay back down on the grass.

Sleep.

In the morning, it was quite clear that Ishad, though he had been right by Broken and Mai last night, knew nothing of the conversation. Mai knew she should have expected as much. Broken must have known that Ishad would sleep soundly, and that was the only reason he shared.

Realizing this, Mai made the difficult decision not to tell Ishad what had been said. She didn’t want Broken to stop trusting her. Once Broken had told everything there was to tell about himself, then she would relate what she knew to Ishad. When she told him at last, she knew he would understand.

Or she hoped. Ishad was a very rational person, but rational people could only be pushed so far. He would probably ask why she had not told him in the carriage, when Broken was on the outside.

But the answer to that, was that she believed that Broken would know if Ishad knew. For now, he had to be kept in the dark.

After they all had breakfast, Broken made an announcement, as Claw-Back flew down from a tree, and landed on his shoulder. “We will only spend one more night on this travel,” he said. “For in two more days, we will reach Asan Paril.”

We’re almost there, thought Mai, happily. We’re almost there.

They got into the carriage, and began to ride.

Inside, Ishad asked, “What do you intend to do once we reach Asan Paril?”

And with that question, much of Mai’s fantasy evaporated. The truth was, she really didn’t know.

“Go to Tur is Ashat,” said Mai. “Convince him to protect me.”

“I gathered as much previously,” said Ishad. “But then, what you going to do with the rest of your life? You can’t just hide behind the walls of Asan Paril until you grow old and die.”

Mai did not want that. It was only now that she realized that once she reached Asan Paril, she would be free to do whatever she chose. She had just been expecting to stay in the Asan Paril palace, subconsciously. After all, that was really the only thing she knew how to do. She wasn’t suited for a job. But she didn’t want to hide in the palace for the rest of her life, hoping the city’s neutrality would protect her.

“I don’t know,” said Mai.

“And where do I fit into this?” asked Ishad. “I tried to kid myself before, that once you reached Asan Paril, I would just leave. But the truth is, I love you, Mai, and I never want to leave you.”

Mai looked at him. She loved him too, but she had never expected the feeling to last. She had thought that once she reached Asan Paril, they would go their separate ways, if only because they had no future together. Ishad was of the middle class, and Mai was a noble.

But now, it seemed, Ishad thought differently.

“I don’t see how we can stay together,” said Mai.

“Do you really love me?” asked Ishad.

“Yes.”

“Then we will find a way.” Ishad thought. “Perhaps I could base my merchant business, when I set it up, in Asan Paril. To do so would be a smart idea, even without you, as it is unlikely war will come to the city. Then, when my business booms, which you know it will, given my talents, we could marry. Rich merchants sometimes marry nobles, after all.”

The frightening thing about the idea was that is seemed like it might work. It did not seem impossible. But the idea did not seem real, either. As much as Mai wanted to believe that what Ishad said could happen, she could not.

“Because of who I am,” she asked him, “won’t that be like flirting with chance? I mean, I have enemies, and proclaiming me to be your wife, with all the world watching, would make them target you, as well.”

Silently Mai remembered something Broken had said, after she had confronted him right after Ishad had been hurt. He had said something to the effect of: expect more like this in the future, and not from me. And Broken had the disturbing tendency to never be wrong.

“We can make it work, Mai,” said Ishad. “But only if we believe that future is a possibility.”

Mai was suddenly conscious of what they had, right then. They were in a run-down carriage, with cracks beginning to appear on the inside of the wooden walls. Baggage in black saddlebags was strewn around their foot room, and they sat together on a small bench, as they had no other choice, as they had nowhere else to sit.

How can we turn the little we have here into a future?” Mai wondered. It didn’t seem possible.

They talked about other things for the rest of the ride, that day.

Night proceeded as it always did. They stopped again, in a bit of small forest. Broken seemed unwilling to let them rest in a town, after what had happened in Bola, but Mai didn’t mind, as she was worried about the same thing.

But as they ate dinner over a campfire that night, Mai let herself feel a small amount of elation. This time, tomorrow, she would be in a place where she would be able to stop running.

The three of them practiced a little with swords, that night, as Claw-Back watched, hooting, from a tree.

Then, they all lay down to go to sleep on the forest floor, but Mai only pretended to doze off. When she was sure Ishad was sound asleep, she sat up again.

And, just as she had expected, Broken sat up a split moment later. “What is it?” he asked Mai, as she gazed at him.

“Last night, you told me something very personal about who you are,” said Mai. “Tonight, I need to ask for advice about something very personal to me.” And then, she detailed Ishad’s plan to open a business, and then marry her. “Do you think what he suggested could work?” she asked.

There was none of the usual cryptic in Broken’s words. “I think it could,” he said at last. “I think it could give you the happiness you seek. And I will do everything in my power to make it work.”

“Really?” Mai asked. “You think it would work?” But then her mind wandered over to the other part of what Broken had said. That he, personally, would help it work.

“In truth, I do,” said Broken.

But then, suddenly suspicious, Mai asked, “What do you mean, you would make it work?”

“I fear I have not made my duties to you clear,” said Broken. “I will not leave you after we reach Asan Paril. When I swore to be your protector, I swore to be your protector for life.”

And the full impact of those words hit Mai. “But…don’t you have a life?” she asked. “Once you get me safely to Asan Paril, you don’t need to protect me anymore.”

“That may be true,” said Broken. “But the fact remains, if I leave you, I will have nowhere to go.”

“But why?” asked Mai.

“Because everything I once had is now gone.”

There was so much raw emotion connected to that sentence, Mai felt overwhelmed.

“You couldn’t have lost everything,” she said. “For someone of your talents, there can’t be anything impossible for you to fix.”

“I cannot go back in time,” said Broken. “I cannot change what already happened. And there is nothing left to be salvaged.”

Mai remembered what she had said to Ishad, about how Broken must hide horrible secrets from his past. Now, she was getting evidence of that. For some reason, in spite of what he had put Ishad through, Mai felt herself feeling sorry for him. It was incredible, she knew, to feel sorry for a man who seemed to have all the talent in the world.

But she did.

“I don’t know what happened,” said Mai. “I won’t ask you to tell me, because that’s probably one of your secrets. But know that I’m sorry for you.”

“Thank you,” said Broken. “That means much to me.”

Mai suddenly was confused. “When I came to you before, you did not open up like this,” she said. “Before yesterday and today, you never treated me like I deserved to know the slightest thing about you or your life.”

“And you want to know what is different now?” asked Broken. “I will tell you. Today and yesterday, you came to me sincerely wanting to talk to me, and not yell rhetoric. I appreciated that.”

Claw-Back flew down from a tree, and landed on the forest floor, nearby them both. She hooted a little, and cocked her head to the side.

“She says that she could not help but listen,” said Broken. “And she also says, speaking as one that has endured great misery, and now has found great happiness, she hopes that we can find our happiness as well.”

Then, suddenly, Ishad sat up, and rubbed open his eyes. “What’s going on?” he said.

Broken shot Mai a look that clearly said: please don’t tell him.

And Mai respected his wish. “Nothing,” she said. “Let’s get back to sleep.”

And so, after Claw-Back flew away, the three of them did just that.

The morning came wilted. As it was the day that they would reach Asan Paril, Mai had expected herself to feel more excited. Instead, she just felt dead. Last night’s conversation had drained her.

They had breakfast, got into the carriage, and began to ride.

The first sign that Asan Paril was ahead was a checkpoint manned by white-leather armored soldiers. They were Asan Paril guards, and their job was to prevent the chaos of the outlying lands from coming into the city.

The guards were quite easy to get past, however. It did not take much convincing for them to believe that Mai, Broken, and Ishad were travelers heading to Asan Paril to escape the war. For indeed, that was what they were.

They headed on, after a brief stop for lunch perhaps an hour after the checkpoint. As they continued to ride, it became clear that the area they had passed into was no war zone. In the towns around Asan Paril, and on the roads, people bustled with the exchanges of everyday life. Their activities made the sullenness of Bola seem almost unreal. How could there be such order, and such chaos, so close to each other?

Mai didn’t know. And in the scheme of things, Mai realized that she knew very little.