《Eldritch Maiden》21. An Afternoon In the Life
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"Could you say that again, but this time with more... passion?" says the mustached man standing behind the camera.
"Ummmm, okay?" Replies Mr. Memely, then he clears his throat and begins speaking. "So, uh, as I was saying class the, um, Association is more of a loose collection of agreements than a set of official rules. Heroes like Beacon and Blind Justice administer disagreements in a mediation capacity not as a rule making body. Heroes and governments agree to work under these rules because of the relative freedom it affords each side and the necessity of finding common ground to handle threats like Becca, Ash, Hana-Komyi, and so on."
Mr. Memely pauses for a moment to stare at the camera, clearly distracted. Then he slowly resumes his lecture. “Well… the Association doesn’t really film, ahem, record these agreements so this is just what the officials disclose but the general idea Beacon had when he pushed for the creation of the group was to provide a simple framework that anyone could use. The fewer rules and regulations involved the greater ease of adoption.”
Clearing his throat a second time Mr. Memely stares helplessly at the camera for a second before continuing.
“And by sidestepping the creation of an official legal body, the Association remains a voluntary organization that protects its members without threat of coercion. Of course, none of that means the Association has no power. The Association will publicly blacklist heroes that flaunt the rules and agreements or abuse the mediation process in bad faith. As most governments and private organizations openly prefer to work through the Association, a blacklisting is tantamount to stripping a hero of their protected status and a public declaration they cannot be trusted by the public.”
"I hate to interrupt again, but you've got to stop staring at the camera Kevin," says the mustachio, this time stepping out from behind his equipment.
With a flush, Mr. Memely replies with embarrassment in his tone, "In the classroom it'll be Mr. Memely please. Who even gave you people permission to film my class?"
While the two begin to argue over the minute details of the taping, Hailey turns to her friend Missy Anderson and begins to whisper.
"Pssst, hey!" She says poking Missy in the side, "Ginny again?" At Missy's nodded confirmation she shakes her head in response and then starts speaking again, "Why and what all did she do this time?"
Missy turns in her desk and motions over Theo and Bella who lean in, "She decided it was time to go on vacation, so she took off to the Bahamas or somewhere else nice and warm. The school didn't want her to fall behind on her work so she hired a film crew to take her place. Hence all this." Missy waves her hands around the room at the various sound equipment and slew of professionals looking bored as their boss argues with Mr. Memely.
Bella pushes her glasses up and then hisses nervously, "But what about class! This guy keeps interrupting Mr. Memely's lecture and if he doesn't finish it we won't be prepared for the pop quiz next week!"
Theo looks at her in surprise, "Pop quiz next week? How do you know about that?"
Bella replies, "Mr. Memely has a pop quiz exactly three days after every holiday, long weekend, or teacher rest day. I've been tracking his pop quizzes for the past four years with the help of Mrs. Andrew, that woman really knows everything about everyone."
The other three stare at her in amazement for a few moments until Hailey nervously says, "But... why? I mean you get a perfect on all of them anyways right?"
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With a shake of her head, Bella answers, "But what if I miss a question? If I know when all the quizzes are coming I can get in some extra study time in advance and make sure I do well."
"That seems a little excessive but that's why you're the best." Hailey replies with a smile. Then she leans in towards Bella, "Speaking of, I was wondering if you had time to tutor me in a couple classes too? Or maybe just let me copy your notes? I know you're pretty busy already tutoring Jake."
Bella smiles and waves her hands, "Oh no! I'd be happy to help. When the school strong-armed me into tutoring Jake for the sake of the football team, I thought it was going to be a nightmare but he's been really nice so I'm happy to help out anybody I can. Maybe we could all do a group study session sometime?" She says with a hopeful lilt in her tone.
Theo responds with a smile, "Yeah I'd be down. But not until after the next game. Jake might have time to study, but with all the practice time I missed with that injury I have to spend some extra time catching up on the field. The Martyrs need me after all."
"What kind of team name is Martyrs anyways?" Missy wonders aloud.
Bella chimes in, "Did you know we used to be known as the St. Cecilia Musicians? Our team's nickname was the bad band until 1990."
Theo shakes his head, "Well we've still got a bad band but I'm glad it's not the football team anymore."
Bella shakes her head, "Actually the bad band was one of the best teams in the division. Our school pep band used to put on a bad performance intentionally at halftime to rile up the fans. They would go out and play the same song, but each player would pick a different tempo so it sounded like a big loud mess. Then they'd do a sloppy march around the field, have an ‘accident’ happen near the visiting team’s locker, and spend most of the halftime sitting outside playing as loud and obnoxiously as they could. About a minute before it was time to start the next half they'd miraculously get everything sorted out and march off playing perfectly. Apparently it demoralized and confused the opposition so much we became famous for it and the entire team got the nickname the bad band."
Theo blinks. Then replies, "That's pretty cool. Why'd they stop doing it?"
"I don't know, I guess they just stopped eventually. I could ask Mrs. Anderson?" Bella replies.
Theo waves her off. "Naw, its ancient history. No worries."
Missy grimaces as one of the microphones pokes her. "Hey watch it buddy!" She warns the operator.
He mumbles an apology and swings his microphone back around to continue catching what he can of the conversation between Mr. Memely and the director, both of whom are now speaking in raised voices.
"Did Ginny hire a Hollywood film crew or something? These guys are way too intense." Theo says with a laugh.
Missy chimes in, "Yeah actually she did. This is the same crew behind all those crappy superhero movies lately. You know the one where Becca isn't a crazy psycho murder queen she's just misunderstood? But apparently she didn't bother to tell the director this was just him filming her classes so she can watch them later so he thinks this is some kind of arthouse project and everyone here is like insanely dedicated method actors."
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Theo replies, "Wow that's like the most insane thing I've heard all day. Keep in mind Bella literally just explained how she tracked Mr. Memely's pop quizzes over the past four years. My standards are pretty high."
Hailey shakes her head, "That girl. It probably didn't even occur to her that maybe, just maybe, it might be a bit overkill to hire a crew like this. All so she can wing off to a beach for a week. She is just the most irresponsible person sometimes."
"ALRIGHT, GET OUT OF MY CLASSROOM!" shouts Mr. Memely from the front of the room, clear agitation and frustration in his voice.
"YES! Exactly, that's the kind of emotion I need from you!" The mustached director hugs Mr. Memely, runs back to the camera, and says, "Action!" with clear excitement in his tone.
Mr. Memely slumps for a moment, sputtering, then turns bemused back to his whiteboard where he begins writing out the homework. Once finished he turns back to the class and with resignation in his voice speaks, "Well the, ah, homework is on the board. Just, just try and get it back by tomorrow alright?"
With that, he sits down at his desk and begins to grade. Bella raises her hand frantically and waves it about until she has his attention.
"Yes Bella?" He asks with a defeated tone.
"Mr. Memely! What about your lecture? I'll only have book notes for the qu- for the next test whenever that is!" Bella exclaims frantically.
After staring at her for a moment, Mr. Memely speaks. "Oh, yeah good point. Ummm, I think you can probably find a copy of The Mediator's Guide to Working on Behalf of Heroes in the library, chapter five on dealing with international bodies covers everything I was going to say today. I think it's somewhere in the back just next to the religious section. So if you can suffer the dust you're free to do some extra reading."
With a smile, Bella thanks Mr. Memely and turns to the group. "So, first study session tonight then? I'll be in the library anyways it seems."
Missy shakes her head, "Can't. Dad wants to teach me how to shoot in case Jake ever gets too friendly."
Theo looks over with concern. "You're joking right? Because Jake will definitely think you're joking and I kind'a like the guy. I'd hate to see him die just for being an idiot."
Missy shrugs. Then with a coy tone she replies, "Well you tell him and he can find out." Then she glances over to the clock and begins piling her books back into her bag. "But either way, class is about to end. Sorry I can't make it tonight, we can plan these a bit more in advance and I'll find the time with my dad okay?" She says glancing over at Bella.
Bella nods and then turns to Hailey, "I know Theo's got practice so how about you?"
Hailey nods in affirmation, "Absolutely. Dusty old books and Bella, sounds like a fun time." Then she too begins piling things into her bag. "And since there are no boys around we can gossip all we want."
"Hey!" Theo replies with a smile. "I think you girls gossip a whole lot even when guys are around."
"Well either way." Hailey says as she swings herself out of her desk and begins walking towards the door. "Class is over, so let's get moving! We've got a few scenes of math to shoot and I'm excited to see what the director's instructions for Mr. Glass will be!"
The group paces out of the room, leaving Bella behind. As they walk out of the room and start down the hallway towards math, the group pauses at Missy’s locker to gossip with friends in the hall and prepare to split up for the next class.
As they do, they call out to passing friends and acquaintances. “Hey Trishia!” says Missy with a smile as she leans against her locker and waits for Jake to show up.
Trishia and her two friends don’t pause for a second as they stride down the hall.
“Hey Missy, how’s Jake doing?” then the girl smirks at one of her friends, “oh wait, Ally already knows all about it, they were having sooooo much fun chatting in class today. Your boyfriend mentioned he hasn’t seen you at all today, I sure hope he’s not thinking of breaking up with you.” Her words may be civil, but her tone is not.
As the three pass by with haughty looks of superiority, Ally tosses out one final barb. “It’s too bad Jake doesn’t have a girlfriend who appreciates him in all the ways a real woman would.”
Theo shakes his head, “Man those three are the worst. Why do you even try to be nice to them Missy?”
Missy sighs. “Because Jake is too nice and doesn’t realize those three harpies want to set him up with that dumb Ally. They twist anything I say so I look like a crazy jealous clingy girlfriend and poison his ears in class all day. I keep hoping I can just kill them with kindness.”
Hailey purses her lips and offers an expression of sympathy before patting the downcast girl on the back and offering words of support. “Jake really likes you Missy, he just has bad taste in friends.”
Theo indignantly interjects, “I’m right here! Literally right here.” He gestures to his chest in mock irritation.
Hailey smiles, rolls her eyes, and shoves him down the hall playfully. “Exactly my point! Who even likes you? Nobody here that’s for sure!”
Stumbling into the hall in a pantomime of an actual wound, Theo clutches his breast and gazes up to the heavens. Then he replies in a fanciful and melancholic tone, “Alack! My heart! Your mystical womanly powers have destroyed it! Oh inimical fate! Oh ye heartless wench!”
“Did you seriously just quote Ferrous Man Four: The Revenge of the Brown Recluse and Captain Constitution to me?” Hailey asks with a laugh as she walks into the hallway after Theo. The pair then continues on to class together laughing, having spotted Jake walking up from the other end of the hall.
Missy and Jake will abscond in the opposite direction. While the four sometimes stands at the corner and talks for a minute before heading out, today Missy and Jake need time alone together.
But what of the fifth member of this troupe? The girl sitting alone in a classroom even now? What of Bella? Well, dear reader, our day in the life is not yet done, for Hailey or her friend. Before we reach the evening, our story must take a slight detour next week with… “An Afternoon in the Life of Bella!”
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