A big red button just begging to be pressed.

I hesitate for a second, maybe three.

Should I press it? Hmmm. my condition isn’t the best.

Who knows what’ll happen to me.

I sit down somewhat, finally taking a rest.

Nothings around anyway. I wonder what this place is meant to be?

Oh right, healing. If anything were to happen I should be at my best.

I insert the tree branch still sticking out of my shoulder into my inventory.

Inven. Tory?

Error. Error. My mind resets.

I gaze at my empty shoulder, then at the hole still through my stomach, then back at my shoulder.

Finally noticed it, huh

‘’YOU KNEW?? IDENTIFYYYYYYYYY!!!!!!!’’

you aren’t the brightest cat in the toolbox

Thinking back on how much I struggled to get that pole out and how that hateful identify gave me a hint no less!

Blood (what little I had left) rushed to my head imagining identifies smug face as she watched me making a fool of myself!

GETOUTGETOUTGETOUT

I facepalm so hard I see the stars again.

---

I crack an eye open. How long was I out?

Tilting my head to the side I notice my hand is back to being wholly flesh.

I rub my face and slap my cheeks, the shock dispersing the last of my sleepiness.

Alright time to get my bearings. ‘’Identify, how long was I out and what’s my health’’

Somewhere between 3 days and a while. Health currently at does-it-matter%

‘’... Why do I even bother. Can you at least tell me what this button does?’’

It gets you out

‘’Does it? You aren’t pranking me again, are you?’’

I know what you like to do, get my hopes up only to insult and berate me down!

.

Oh right, my health! Health checkup!

Head: Ears, check! Hair, check! Everything is in order!

Arms: flesh and bone! Nails are present and sharp as ever!

Torso: my shoulder healed up completely and the hole in my stomach is more like a piercing. A bit of a shame since I would’ve made an epic hollow cosplay.

Tail: in full floof! I wiggle my tail around just to be sure and it’s as flexible as always!

Legs: thighs are spotless and my legs go all the way to my calves! The nubs are a little raw but that’ll go away in a jiffy! Mini-me is also back in full capacity from its… I’d rather not remember.

I put my hands on my hips and give a hearty laugh. HA! Full-ish health!

I sit up from the ground and give the glowing red button one last look

Deep breath.

This is it.

I take out the now-pristine ornamental spear and boop the big red button.

The entire building shakes, lights flickering as dust gets agitated, obscuring my vision. Then. nothing.

Is this it?

…

I guess that’s it.

‘’Soo identify. Uh, the thing I said earlier.’’

‘’It’s not some delayed poison trap or anything, is it?

The walls aren’t gonna suddenly start closing in on us?

No big boulder? Pitfall filled with spikes?’’

You’d be fine regardless so just accept it

I- i. I can’t argue with that logic. Flexing my newly formed legs it seems nothing can stop me.

“Oh right, identify, how come I haven’t been getting level ups and stat messages lately?”

I thought you said you didn’t need my help, I don't need to tell you everything

“Wait what? You can do that? I kinda need those stats Identify!”

it’s pointless to waste stats on a cat who can’t even use them

Hey! I just never had the chance to!

“Just gimme my levels already!”

...

Level up Level up Level up Restoration levelled up Restore changed into immortality(?) Other things changed. congrats. Good enough

Identify… you really know how to grind my gears huh

What is good enough?! You lazy piece of -

wait

immortality? is that the next step up or was I always immortal? Can all my skills evolve too?

this gives me more questions than answers!

"status open"

Name: Sucksuke

Level: 66

Str: 125 (+60)

Sta: 60 (+4.8)

Race: Beastkin - Cat - Other?

Class: Assassin

Spd: 101 (+33.33)

Agi: 45 (+17.1)

HP: 90% aliveness

MP: --?

End: 50 (+8)

Vit: 47 (+10.11)

Unspent points: 20

Status: agitated

Int: 40 (-8.14)

Wis: 33 (-3.72)

Skills

Titles

Cheat Skill: Succ lv 34

Immortality lvl 25/50

Otherworlder

A kitty

Accuracy lvl 7/10

Item box lvl 13/20

The unchanging

Cheat skill holder

Night vision lvl 7/15

Identify: the only one with sense

Sucker

Main character

Catlike

Bad luck

Clutz

hold E to heal

Martial arts

cut me some slack

Pyrophobia

Hand to claw combat lvl 6/10

Sharp claws MAX

Superhuman strength

Snowball warrior

Swordbreaker style lvl 6/10

Summon sword style lvl 3/10

Dungeon diver

Cross-dresser

Party members

Baboon king

One who overcame calamity

Every Side Character - level 52 cardboard mage

Illuminate - level 40 light elf guide

Superhuman speed

An idiot

Oi, Identify, was it always like this? it's nice to see that side and I are doing fine.

Since I’m immortal or something, ill put everything in speed. I’ve been doing a lot of running lately.

I stand up and inspect the still glowing red button. Above the button is a symbol amalgamation of wings, snakes, a heart and a dragon? Superimposed on that image is a big plus and a vague feeling of help.

I think that’s auto-translate at it again to help me make sense of this world.

So instead of a cross do they have that mess of a symbol everywhere or does every part of it create some sort of message. Is the plus also a part of the image or was that added on?

Above the bizarre help symbol, is what I assume to be a bird coming down from the heavens? Is this a metaphor for something? The bird symbol with rays of light behind it could also mean it’s a bird of light giving help to those in need. I don’t understand.

I press the button again for good measure, and another so the last one wasn’t a fluke. Once again. Nothing.

I walk around the empty hall, lights dotted around give this place a cold feeling. The material on the inside seems to be some sort of durable earth unlike the walls outside.

I head to one of the open rooms to the side and it seems to be a kitchen area large enough to feed an army. It seems like none of the shelves are stocked sadly.

There’s nothing else to do here so ill go exploring around the other rooms.

There are quite a few large openings along the ground floor so I head to the next one that catches my interest, the crafting room!

Made with reinforced brick this entire room gives off an industrial feel. Workbenches, alchemy tables, saws and furnaces all sectioned off in different corners of the room. I don't know how any of them would be able to work in peace with so many professions in one place but I'm sure they thought of that.

I don't know how to use anything in this room so I move to the next

I'm just wasting time after all

The next room is full of dirt. Is this meant to be for farming? They really have everything here.

Is this place meant to be a self-sustained city? Why did they abandon it then? What were those guards for?

Anyway! the next room is a massive pool! Or some kind of water enclosure.

There seems to be a sophisticated filtration system simulating natural processes running from both a saltwater and freshwater pool for some reason.

I dive into the saltwater labelled pool only to remember that I can't swim.

Floundering around in vain, Water fills my lungs as I sink like a rock. The deepest body of water I've touched was my bathtub and watching nat geo wild.

I sink for about 10 meters before finally touching something solid. Sand clouds up upon impact, struggling to open my eyes, the bottom of this pool is covered in multicoloured coral though it feels desolate without any fish.

I try to call for Identify but only manage to gurgle out a few bubbles. What do I do, what do I do.

Uuuuuuuuh, right! Suck!

‘’Ghlehtrck!’’ suck!

My body rises up slowly

Water parts above excruciatingly s l o w l y.

I eventually reach the surface with a light ripple and cling onto the edge like my immortal life depended on it.

Clawing my way out of the pool I drop onto the beautifully solid ground and vacate my lungs.

That's enough exploring for now.

I drag my dripping, weary body out of the room and collapse in the gathering hall.

Name: Sucksuke

Level: 66

Str: 125 (+60)

Sta: 60 (+4.8)

Race: Beastkin - Cat - Other?

Class: Assassin

Spd: 121 (+39.93)

Agi: 45 (+17.1)

HP: 70% aliveness

MP: --?

End: 50 (+8)

Vit: 47 (+10.11)

Unspent points: 0

Status: like a drowned cat

Int: 40 (-8.14)

Wis: 33 (-3.72)

Skills

Titles

Cheat Skill: Succ lv 36

Immortality lvl 25/50

Otherworlder

A kitty

Accuracy lvl 7/10

Item box lvl 13/20

The unchanging

Cheat skill holder

Night vision lvl 7/15

Identify: eating popcorn

Sucker

Main character

Catlike

Bad luck

Clutz

hold E to heal

Martial arts

cut me some slack

Pyrophobia

Hand to claw combat lvl 6/10

Sharp claws MAX

Superhuman strength

Snowball warrior

Swordbreaker style lvl 6/10

Summon sword style lvl 3/10

Dungeon diver

Cross-dresser

Party members

Baboon king

One who overcame calamity

Every Side Character - level 52 cardboard mage

Illuminate - level 40 light elf guide

Superhuman speed

An idiot