Yu leaned over onto all fours and vomited what little remained of her breakfast onto the forest floor. Tears still running through the blood on her face, she threw up at coppery taste in her mouth and at the disgust and shame she felt within herself. But no matter how hard her stomach clenched, the emotions rolling through her didn’t lessen. Nothing would ever be the same. She had killed a human. Damn those fool boys and that whole family and clan.

Yu knew she couldn’t stay there. Someone might come, or the blood would attract a beast and she was in no state to fight either way. Firming her resolve, she pressed her arms against the ground and crawled to Bao Panduan’s body. With shaking hands, she took the blood-covered ring off his finger and put it in her red leather pouch. Then she picked up the extra badge he had dropped at his feet and put it in her ring. She went up to his head and pulled the arrow out with a crunching sound causing her to dry heave a few times.

Standing, Yu gagged again as she stepped over to the boy whose throat she had cut open and tried to do the same but saw he had no ring, so she took his belt pouch and sent that into hers. The third boy was the same. Finally, she trudged over to Bao Saiche, the boy who she had mutilated, and took his blood-covered ring with spots of gold glittering through the ghastly masking.

After more wrenching pain from an empty stomach clenching too hard from once again dry heaving, she fled from an area of the forest within which lay four young bodies, soon to be swallowed by the forest and its scavengers.

***

In a daze, Yu ran through the forest until she came to where her subconscious directed her. She found herself kneeling over the pool of water with the fish she had hunted just a few days ago. Looking at her blurry reflection, Yu could see only red and silver. Yu leaned forward further, allowing her body to fall entirely into the water with a soft splash.

The water was freezing, but Yu hung there, her limbs floating out to her side as she sank, watching the submerged world through the crystal clear water. At least it was clear until the blood began washing free from her skin, hair, and armor. The boot knife she had not cleaned appeared in her hand from her ring and was washed clean as well. The fish she had hunted and turned in for points were nowhere to be found, likely scared off by her and her blood.

Yu waved the dagger in the blood, seeing the red steel blade remain clean, and the red leather wrapping of the handle washed as clean as her armor. Still sinking, Yu stared at the last of the blood that once belonged to fellow humans flowing off of her form, and. . . swirl away?

A surprised Yu watched as the red water began moving of its own accord down and away from her in the pool. As Yu’s enhanced lungs and blood granted her a great deal of leeway with breathing, she wouldn’t need to head up for a breath for another few minutes. So she kicked her legs and followed the stream of red until it reached a small crack in the dirt and stone wall of the pool.

Yu swam up to the surface, took a few breaths and then one final deep breath, and swam back down. She returned to the crack just in time to see the last of the blood being sucked inside. Yu held her hand in the water but didn’t notice anything, even when she moved her hand right up to the crack and covered it.

Taking her boot knife back out, she sliced her palm and watched as the blood with a few gold streaks streamed right into the crack. Yu stuck the boot knife into the crack and started attempting to pry the stones loose, but it was solid and she had no leverage with such a small blade. As she didn’t want to risk damaging the red steel, she stopped and decided to investigate another day.

Either way, it had helped distract her from her thoughts and she swam back up to the surface. Thinking a good distraction might not be a bad idea, Yu ran back to the grade 1 area and started working to simply hunt, dress, and store beast kills. It was relatively rote for her at that point. She would earn little that day, but it was important for her to feel like she had accomplished something positive to offset . . .

***

When the sun finally started to set, she worked her way back to the flight area, changed back into her robes, and found a blue-hair inner sect elder standing there. He saw her and his eyes got huge. Yu bowed to him like nothing was wrong and ordered a flight up at the table, same as she always did. The elder called out, “Disciple.”

Yu looked at him and asked, “Yes, elder?”

He looked her up and down. “Did you meet any other disciples in the forest during your hunt?”

Thinking how to answer, Yu shook her head. “I have rarely run into another disciple in the forest. I did possibly see one or two disciples with white hair and a few with them, but did not interact, not wishing to disturb their hunt. Otherwise, I don’t think so. It’s a huge forest after all, even if I mostly stayed in the grade 1 area today. Are you looking for someone? Can I help?” Yu was proud that her voice did not waver even a little. To herself she sounded completely normal.

“No. You may go,” he told her with narrowed eyes.

Yu bowed and walked to her flight up. When she returned, she ate by herself—a Water meal—got home, fed a tired Bai who the girls had spent a day cavorting around with, took a long soaking bath, and went to bed, curled around her cub and the enchanting books, trying hard to see the words on the pages and not the faces of her victims.

***

The next morning Yu skipped breakfast and went directly to the vice leader’s office. The outer sect disciple who was at the desk in front of his office door asked her what she wanted. He was different from the last one Yu met.

“I need to see the vice leader. Is he in? It’s an emergency.”

He looked her up and down and said in a snide tone, “Tell me what the emergency is and I’ll pass it on.”

“It’s personal,” Yu explained. “Just tell him Fenghuang Yu is here and needs to see him immediately.”

He snorted. “I can’t bother the vice leader for every disciple that comes by asking for his time. Tell me what it is about and I can pass it on.”

Yu said impatiently, “I can’t. Tell him Fenghuang Yu is here and says it’s critically important.” She emphasized her name.

He stood and glared down at her. “Well, Fenghuang Yu. I’ll pass the message on when I get to it and he has time. Now get out.”

Growling, Yu marched past the desk and the scowling disciple towards the vice leader’s office.

The disciple yelled, “Hey!” and ran to her.

He reached out and the moment his hand touched her arm Yu moved in a blur. She reached around, grabbed his wrist, twisted her body, leaned forward, and leveraged the disciple so he launched over her bowed form and flew, his feet and head swapped in their normal positions. The disciple slammed into the door leading to the vice leader’s office with a loud crash and he collapsed onto the floor in a groaning heap.

Yu blinked in surprise. She hadn’t thought it would be that easy. Why were so many outer sect disciples so weak? How did they even manage to stay in the sect?

A moment later, the door opened quickly and the vice leader stood there calling out, “What in the-”

The vice leader stared down at the crumpled groaning body of one of his personal assistants and Fenghuang Yu standing there, glaring at the boy.

The vice leader sighed and asked, “Disciple Fenghuang Yu, was that really necessary?”

Yu’s response was firm and aggravated in tone. “Absolutely not, vice leader. Your assistant could simply have told you I was here to see you and it was an emergency, as I asked. Instead, he told me he would tell you when he got around to it and to leave.”

Seeing his raised eyebrows she asked, “Do you really think I would come see you like this if it wasn’t critical. Very critical.”

His face closed off and he said, “Come in,” before turning around and walking back to his desk. Yu followed, stepping over the prone and moaning body. He’d be fine. It was just a little bump into a door.

Yu closed it behind her and sat across the desk from him. She saw her hands were shaking but firmed her resolve. Without waiting, she went right into it in a flat voice. “When I was in the forest hunting on my mission day yesterday, four Bao clan disciples showed up and tried to kill me.” His eyebrows rose but she continued, “I killed the three outer sect disciples after they confessed to it. One was Bao Saiche, I don’t know the names of the others. An inner sect disciple, Bao Panduan was still alive after I killed the three and he confessed to the details. Then I killed him too. I left their bodies in the forest but took their rings and one other thing which I will bring up after you ask your first question.”

The vice elder’s face was flat and serious. “I see.” His tone matched his expression. Yu said nothing until he asked, “What did they confess exactly that made you think they wanted to kill you?”

Yu nodded, knowing something like that would be the first question. “Bao Panduan and the three inner sect disciples surrounded me in the forest. He stated, not asked, but stated, that I was going to give him all my points and the beast meat mission and then my tragic demise would be presumed as my body was to be found later dismembered by the forest’s beasts. I reminded the inner sect disciple that outer sect disciples are limited to gifting five hundred points per month. His response was to hold up this.”

Yu tossed the additional badge onto the bamboo desk.

“And he told me that it was not his badge and that it would allow an unlimited transfer. I declined and Bao Saiche ordered him to move things along and to…” Yu gritted her teeth. “…seize my Qi so they could have their way with me. Having nearly been assaulted already by a boy using that disgusting practice, I proceeded to shoot the inner sect disciple with an arrow before he could get close enough to disable me, and then I killed Bao Saiche and the other two. At that point, I convinced Bao Panduan to tell me everything, which he did, and then I killed him too.”

Vice Leader Mingchen looked thunderous at her description but he was staring at the badge on his desk and not her.

Yu added, “I should also tell you that an inner sect elder that I don’t know but with blue hair was waiting at the flight area and seemed quite surprised to see me.”

Yu saw the muscles of the vice leader’s jaw clench. “I see,” he said again.

“As I said, I would not come and tell you it was an emergency if it was not. Perhaps you can inform your staff.”

“Why come to me and not your master?” he asked.

Feeling slightly better for having gotten it out, Yu folded her now-steady hands in her lap and explained her reasoning. “For two reasons. First, because I don’t know how to reach him without causing a fuss. And second, because you needed to know. I’m relatively confident there won’t be anything material to link me to their disappearance either way. But just in case, you needed to know.”

He looked at her and squinted his eyes. “You seem unusually emotionless. Especially for you. Was that your first time?”

Yu looked down and nodded. Her eyes were watering again.

She needed to pick up the meditation techniques at the message center immediately.

“Do you hate them now?”

Yu nodded.

“If you need to talk about it, I would be happy to listen. We’ve all been through it. This may sound callous, but that won’t be your last. Far from it. All I can tell you is that it gets easier.”

Yu didn’t respond, not knowing what to say to such a statement. They were both silent for a few moments. Would she really start killing so many humans that it got easy?

The vice leader shattered the silence with a return to the original topic. “Well, this will likely result in an escalation of tensions. I doubt they believe you could have killed an inner sect disciple at the Qi Gathering stage along with three outer sect disciples, no matter how talented you are. It is much more likely they will blame someone else.”

“I agree. Especially since I told the unknown elder I might have seen white-haired disciples in the forest.”

The vice leader leaned back in his chair, closed his eyes, and rubbed the bridge of his nose.

He mumbled, “You really are like him.” Then he dropped his hand, looked at Yu and said, “I’ll let your master know what happened. You should be in the clear. I’ll deal with this.” He gestured at the badge. “You have class. Off you go.”

Yu stood, bowed, and left.