17 years earlier

“Are we there yet?” the small child asked.

“Patience, my dear!” the mother answered.

“You will love it!” the father added.

It was a warm sunny day, in January. David Marshall and his family were heading to the beach for a vacation. A celebratory vacation for the man who had just been promoted to a special military unit within Project EDEN. He was one step closer to becoming General.

“I’m hungry!” the small child complained.

“Why does it take so long?” the small child asked.

“Are we still even on the same planet?” the small child questioned.

“Patience, my dear!” the mother replied again for the twentieth time.

David Marshall didn’t know much about the man in charge of Project EDEN. He had heard rumors, he had seen the man in a multitude of occasion, but he had never been formally introduced. Ted Weatherspoon seemed like a nice man. He had insisted that David enjoys a family holiday before joining his new position. He had even rented the car and a beach house for them to enjoy.

Of course, I don’t remember all of this. This is just what I’ve been told. I barely remember anything about that day. It was hot. I was bored. Mom kept telling me to be patient, that it would all be worth it. It was very hot. I didn’t want to be sitting in the car anymore.

David Marshall was happy. Things were finally looking up for him! The climb in the military rank had been slow at time, much slower than he had hoped. A string of bad luck paired up with a few bad decisions had gotten him overlooked. If it hadn’t been for his wife, he would have given up a long time ago. But she had always been by his side, cheering him on and now, he wanted to make her proud. His daughter too. He wanted both to be proud of their husband and father.

“I want to go home,” the small child whined.

“Why is the beach so far?” the small child grumbled.

“Are we…”

And then all went dark.

When I woke up, I was alone in a room. A countryside hospital. It smelled so clean, like fresh linen after my mother changed the bedsheets.

I used to love jumping on the beds.

The crisp linen.

My mother.

Mother.

The little girl sat up on the hospital bed. Her whole body feeling bruised.

“Mom? Dadda? Where’s this?” The terrified child said between two shallow breathes.

A strange man was sitting by her side.

“Mama! Mama! Where are you?”

A nurse came rushing in. The strange man waved her to stay out of this.

The small child was frightened and getting more frantic by the second.

The strange man was pleased with the small child’s vivacity.

What an interesting character, he thought. Much more interesting than her father.

The small child was now in full panic. The nurse, uneasy, was still at the door

“We have protocol,” she said to the man. “Let me tend to the child,” she begged.

But the strange man only needed a stare to make the nurse regret voicing her concerns. Finally, she left.

Eventually the small child calmed down.

“Eva, I am so glad to finally meet you. I am Ted Weatherspoon. We’ve never met, but I have heard so much about you. Your dad talks a lot about you, such a proud father. It is truly unfortunate, what has happened to your mother. She will be greatly missed.”

“Where’s mommy?”

“She is gone my sweet child.”

“To the beach? I wanna go to the beach too.”

“She is far gone. She has left this Earth. One day you shall meet again, perhaps.”

“Where’s daddy?”

“Working. Daddy has a lot of work to do. From now on, Daddy must work hard. Always.”

The small child turned quietly.

The man wasn’t quite sure if she understood her situation. He waited, starring at the bruised creature.

The small child sat on her hospital bed, unmoved by the man’s word. A million thoughts were whirling through her brain. It was uncomfortable. It was chaotic. It was painful. So, she retreated to the confine of her mind to live in a fantasy world where she could still hear her mother’s voice, feel her mother’s touch, and bask in her mother’s love.

“I brought you a book,” the strange man said trying to make friend of the small child. “See, it’s a picturebook. In color!”

The man paused as he slowly flipped the pages. He too had a fantasy world in the confine of his mind, where his lone daughter still lived.

“It belonged to my daughter. She was about your age when she died,” the man said with great pain.

The words seemed to pull Eva from her reverie.

Ted sat on the edge of the hospital bed and started reading the book to the little girl.

It was a collection of words and images.

Eva quietly ran her fingers over the alpacas. On the next page, there was a yellow bird. It seemed sad and lonely; she flipped the pages. Her eyes fell on a golden chandelier. As it glimmered in the sunlight, a gentle smile illuminated her face.

Ted took that as an invitation to push on.

“Your father will be very busy in his new position. Your mother’s death is so untimely… You understand, the military is no place to raise a child. Therefore, my wife, Mrs. Weatherspoon has so graciously offered to take you in.”

“I want to go home,” the small child swiftly answered.

“Our house will be your new home,” Ted pressed her.

“I want my mommy,” the small child worried.

“Mrs. Weatherspoon has been waiting for you,” Ted said with a frightening smile.

“I want my daddy,” the small child demanded with sudden passion.

“Your daddy has already gone back to work,” Ted retorted.

Eva closed the picturebook and fell quiet again.

A Marshall doesn’t cry, her father had once told her, after she had fallen from her bicycle.

Eva closed her eyes and retreated in her mind, once more.

Mommy, mommy, where are you?

“Tomorrow I’ll be back to get you. You’re coming home with us Eva. To think that such a tragic event could turn into so much happiness. Mrs. Weatherspoon has been eager to meet you.”

Happiness? Mommy, I don’t want to go. Take me with you! Please. I’ll be patient, I promise. I’ll never complain again, I promise…

Ted left the room, made his way to the front desk, and fired the nurse who had interrupted him. This hospital was a research facility directly under his control. The young nurse had overstepped her boundaries. It was not enough to fire her, he made sure she would be stripped of her credentials.

hat was the first time I met Ted. That is when Ted took control of my life. I spent the rest of the day sitting on my bed hoping my father would come and visit me. Why wasn’t father visiting me? Why? I wanted to go home. I wanted to go back to before. I didn’t want to be alone. I sat in silence, the picturebook resting on my laps.

It was the time of year; the sun never comes down. Yet the shadows in my heart were growing at an alarming rate. The nurses who came to check on me, didn’t engage. Amidst the late January heat, I felt the cold of their stare. I sat, waiting for the time to pass.

Be patient, echoed my mom’s voice in my heart.

A Marshall doesn’t cry, I heard my father say.

Soon I collapsed on my bed, unable to find the strength to carry on. That is when a nurse came and found it in her heart to comfort me.

“The strongest people are the ones who are still kind after the world tore them apart.” The nurse said pensively while looking out the window. “So, you should strive to be this person. Right now, I know, everything seems dark. Your heart is in a lot of pain. But things will get better I promise. You will grow strong and kind. This is what your mother would have wanted you to be.”

“Strong… and kind…” the little girl repeated.

The nurse was right, I grew up to be strong. But on every other point she had been wrong. The pain never left my heart, I didn’t become kind, things certainly didn’t become better and… is this really what my mother wanted for me?

Still, I took the advice of the nurse and decided that if I didn’t know, yet, how to be kind, I could at the very least be a good girl. A girl my father and mother could be proud of.

The next day, Ted came to get me. On our way out, he signed my death certificate and erased my existence. The day I left the hospital with him, I died.