《Heroes of Errand》Chapter 36- Inside a Chamber Pot
Advertisement
Fern went to stand next Meowlynn as she watched the corpses of the white monsters burn. "I think we should go," he whispered. "We have the gem and we are both still alive so let's get out of this hellhole."
"Icehole," she corrected him. "I assume the hells are a lot warmer and more pleasant than this place."
Meowlynn squeezed Fern's hand before walking off without him. Women were more terrifying than any monster he had run into and he knew that woman may very well burn him to ash if he said something wrong on a wrong day. That was also the thing that was alluring to him.
The rest of the party was trying to take care of Kira. A southern woman who never knew a day of cold in her life was close to freezing to death. "Let's head back to the entrance to rest," suggested Gene. "Then we can go check out that other room that Fern wanted to explore. Priority number one though is getting warm and more importantly getting Kira warm."
Gene picked up Kira and headed to the underground lake. Fern tried to stealthily hold Meowlynn's hand but as he interlaced his fingers with her she talked to Gene. "I'll control the raft in Kira's absence."
"Thank you, Meowlynn," nodded the monk. "Are you sure you're okay?"
"Your bone came out of your arm and she is freezing to death, in comparison I'm fine," snapped the wizard. Clearly, she was the opposite of fine. Once they got back to the raft, the team climb aboard and sailed across the river. Meowlynn got to vent a little more as some of the ice had reformed on the surface so she blasted it away.
The next big challenge climbing up the giant steps. It wasn't really a challenge for Fern because he could become something that could climb like a polar bear but for the rest, it was going to be tough. "I have a plan," claimed Gene. "But, it's going to be slow."
"Slow is better than not moving," said Aliya. "Any movement brings us closer to getting Kira to warmth."
"Very well," the monk turned to Blaine. "We are going to have to work together to help the others."
"What do you need me to do," inquired the curse-blooded male.
"Fern, I need you as well," yelled the monk. "I need Fern to transform into a bear and then you and I will climb on his back. After I'll boost you up or you can boost me, it doesn't matter. The point is that one of us gets up that step. Once there, it's sticking a piton into the ground, attaching a rope, and helping others up when they get to the top."
"I'll boost you," Blaine looked at Gene's arm. "Even though magic healed your arm, it was just broken. I'm sure it stings like a thousand wasps and you should rest it as much as possible."
Advertisement
Fern was slightly annoyed that he was going to be used as a step ladder but it would help the team so it was a sacrifice he was willing to make. After all, they were only here because he couldn't resist the chance to have sex with a beautiful lady and now he was going to be corrupted by a curse. As he thought about the curse, he felt something pulse within his chest. "Kill them," whispered a seductive male voice. "All they do is use you. Kill them and rid yourself of that burden."
"Who said that," asked Fern.
"Who said what," scoffed Meowlynn.
"I'll be watching you," the dark and sexy voice said before silence came into Fern's mind.
"Hello, Fern," motioned Gene.
"Yeah, sorry." Fern shook his head and then changed into a polar bear to lift Blaine and Gene up. Fern then had to go through the motions of lifting up the men, climbing up the steps, and repeating until they were at the top. Though while he waited for the boring job to be over he watched Blaine help everyone up. The druid became very jealous as he watched that curse-blooded male place his hands on the asses of the women as he pushed them up.
"They could all be yours," whispered the voice again. "Just kill the men. Then you could have all the women you want. Breed as much as you want even if that means raping them."
"Get out of my head," roared Fern. Not that anyone else could understand him while he was a bear.
"Not that a handsome man like you would have to resort to such brutish tactics."
"Leave me alone," cried the druid.
Again, the voice went quiet as he climbed to the top of the stairs. The Jellybeans went to the warmest part of the cave and made their camp. Using some of the white fur Blaine collected and a few of their diminishing firelogs they made a fire and placed the hyperthermic halfling next to it. Gene and Aliya sat next to her share their body heat and even Meowlynn tried using some simple magic to warm him up.
All Fern could think about was trying to stop this voice from talking to him. He didn't know whose voice but he did know it was evil. Whispers of death and power trying to persuade him, it was the same as the rest of his family. What game was this voice playing?
An hour or two later, the group was ready to continue though they were not looking forward to going down the rancid hall. It was voted that Fern had to lead the expedition since it was his idea. The smell grew more foul the further they went towards its source, walls became slimy and sticky.
A black liquid was covering the floor and on the other side was a skeleton clutching a staff that looked like a snake. Weird webbed gloves that had tiny claws were still on the bones. Suddenly, Fern became excited. He wanted that staff to replace the one he currently had not to mention check out whatever those weird gloves were. If nothing else, he could sell them.
Advertisement
A slight drop led into the room, submerging Fern's foot in the disgusting liquid. It made a disturbing suction sound as he lifted his foot out of the thick gelatinous substance. The others just watched as greed pushed the druid further and further into what Fern surmised to be the room equivalent of a chamber pot for those snow apes. Fern guessed that the fool at the end of the room was some unfortunate traveler who was brought here or somehow accidentally stumbled upon this cave and ran into this room to hide.
Finally, Fern reached the other side and grabbed the staff. It was shaped like a python standing on its tail and the head part was arched seeming like it was ready to strike. The skeleton seemed like it was some poor human and this was where his bones would be forever but not his fine things. Fern wasn't going through the trouble of picking his bones out but was willing to put in the effort to take the weird gloves off of him.
After grabbing the strange gloves, he placed them in a bag and started to walk back to the rest of the group. He made his way about halfway through when he stuck his foot into a very thick part of the puddle, probably a pile of dung. His foot started to feel a burning sensation similar to when acid from Meowlynn's ball of acid accidentally splashes on his bear form.
A huge black pile of sticky black sludge, like a ball of scraped-off sewage, sprang out of the waste and tried to wrap around the druid. Aliya summoned a radiant version of her foot and kicked the ooze away from Fern.
"Fuck," yelled Blaine as he ran into the filth. He dragged a blade across his neck but instead of igniting his blood into flames, his blood shed a bright white light illuminating the room. Radiant energy sliced into the black blob cutting it in half. Instead of one giant heap of sludge now they had two smaller ones.
The wizard conjured a fire into her palm and shot a bolt of fire at one of the blobs. The blob bubbled slightly but kept relentlessly attacking the druid. Kira then shot her bow at the same ooze that Meowlynn also fired at. Some of the gelatinous mass flew off and splattered into the rancid liquid that covered the room.
Gene also joined into the fray and moved his way through the muck. He made his way to the slime mound everyone was attacking because it was still attached to Fern. The monk delivered an uppercut to the pile of waste and some of his flesh started burning away. After he swung two more times, the black ooze released its grip on the druid and tried to return to its other half.
Freed from the acidic sludge, Fern morphed into a bear and bit at the piece trying to return to its bigger counterpart. He caught the tail end of it and a mouthful of shit. The bear then vomited uncontrollably as the flavour was so foul that it made him want to tear his mouth out.
The small ooze rejoined itself and then attacked the bear again. It wrapped around the muzzle of the bear and started strangling it with its acidic body. Aliya used the giant foot to try to make the slime let go of Fern but to no avail. Blaine tried to slice off the ooze but only succeeded in cutting it in two again. The second half then wrapped around the midsection of the bear, trying to squeeze the air out of the bear. Vomit continued to come out of Fern's bear-like nose. Fern was suffocating on his own vomit while his throat was being melted so he couldn't even swallow it.
Another bolt of fire came sailing through the air and hit the ooze on the bear's face, freeing Fern from the choking sensation, and allowing him to vomit. The black waste writhed on the top of his head where Kira sniped it. The force of the arrow was so great that it made went into the ooze the was trying to squeeze his lungs. The small ranger then collapsed where she stood, luckily not falling into the waste and feces.
The leader of the Jellybeans then grabbed the ooze and tore it off Fern and kicked the thing further into the room. "Get that hell out of here now," order Gene. Everyone got out as fast as they could, Fern clutched Kira's fur coat with his teeth and carried her all the way to the mouth of the cave.
Once there, he dropped her, returned to his normal self, and summoned a handful of purple berries. He shoved them in his mouth to get rid of the foul taste seeping into his tongue. After, the druid quickly checked the weather, clear and sunny skies showed up in the orb in his palm.
"I hope it was worth it," commented Meowlynn.
"Well the staff looks good," he replied. "Now let's get out of here before while the weather is still good. We don't want to return during a blizzard."
"Okay," agreed Gene. "Let's get out of here. Even if there was a blizzard, the sooner we head back south the warmer we'll get."
The monk turned to the druid, "I'm going to strap Kira to you and we are going to run as fast and as far as we can."
"Yes, sir," he jokingly remarked. At the request of his leader he transformed and waited for the halfling to get strapped to him. He then left the cave but there was a blizzard tearing through the wind. It wasn't right, his weather magic was never wrong. Regardless, once the Jellybeans got out they all started racing away towards the Ardent River as fast as they could.
Advertisement
- In Serial13 Chapters
Adventures of an Eldritch Girl
Hiatus for Re-Write Ť̶͓̱̩͋͆̂͋̇͘͜h̵̜̗̣̹̎̑͘͘͜e̸̗͍̲̼̮̪̎̚ ̴͇̆͗̽E̷̗̱̗͛̓́̄͗͑̚͝ṅ̶̜̮̫̮̋̈́d̶͙͙̳̓̆͘͜l̴͖̯̮͖̔̈́͋͌̆̑͑͝e̵̹͖͍͜͝s̸̢̛͕̰̱̜̯̣̈́͊͆̐s̵̛̪̹͒̊̇ ̷̨̟̪̗͈̯̋ͅG̷̟̘̊̄̇͑̒̎ṙ̷͇͍̫̱̞̘̼̀͝a̴̧̛̼͓̩̻̝̱̖̿̃̕s̴̫̍̐p̵̗̔̋̀̈́͒̀i̴͓͛͊ń̸͕̞̼̼͜g̵̡̧̲̲̯͕͙̎̅͂̃͗̚ ̶̭͊͠T̸͓́̿̋̅͂̎ė̸̛͉̠̑͒̄͘ṇ̵̦̈́͌̓͑̀͊d̷͓̫͕̱̮̘̜͊̈́̅͆͗͘r̸͙̮̽̈́̈͆̈́͋͝i̵̮̠̜̠̬͆l̸̦̻̮̅̅s̴̥̟̤͔̎͌̄͂́̓̔͝ͅ is a completely normal eldritch abomination. But one day, their simple and uneventful life is changed forever when a fragment of their being is summoned to another world. Taking over the body of a young girl, they assimilated her memories and name. Charlie discovered that this new world is completely different from the bottomless abyss she called home. This classic fantasy world is full of colors, sights and sounds that she had never encountered before. Setting out to explore this foreign land, Charlie enjoys sightseeing, good music, and savoring delectable human dishes. She isn't picky with her food, since any severed body part would do. Trigger/Content Warning: The full course features excessive and gratuitous violence with a side dish of gore. The appetizer showcases body horror, and dessert exhibits disturbing scenes. The first chapter is an anomalous steak served extra bloody.
8 134 - In Serial60 Chapters
Tides of Time
One moment Elvie Harper is playing along a beautiful beach in Australia, the next she is lying on a cobblestone street in 1930s London. Except this London is different... it is part of a world with magic. Thrown into a world with different rules, Elvie desperately hopes to learn magic to make her way back to the future. But the road for a magician is never a simple one, and the politics and intrigues of the 1930s have the world on edge. There are things stirring in the darkness, and those who seek power amongst chaos. What hope does one girl have in such a world?
8 187 - In Serial8 Chapters
Therianthrope
Kalon was born into the world of Ira, a world of magic and monsters, unfortunately for him he had no talent, authority or money. A boy so unlucky he had to sell himself into slavery to the corrupt, bigoted and unjust mages in order to clear his fathers debt. One day when Kalon is being hunted by said mages, he uncovers something, something great. A system. Follow Kalon on his quest to topple the corrupt mages. This is my first novel. Any issues please let me know I'm always up for some creative criticism. I'm trying to avoid info dumping and will expose aspects of the world as the story progresses. MC will not be the stagnant type, he will be subjected to many trials throughout the story and continue to change. If that sounds good to you, keep reading and enjoy. I plan to update as frequently as I'm able to.
8 182 - In Serial24 Chapters
Demonify
Civilizations rise and fall. Battles are fought with the fate of the whole continent on the line. Each day is a battle for survival, a battle against creatures so vile they corrode the air itself. Swords clash, Magic is cast, powers clash, weapons break and there is blood. So much blood it paints the ground with the memory of desperation and death. Cities burn down to the ground, their ashes scattered in the wind.The creation of this world, this Virtual Reality took years of Research and commitment. The people of the modern age are bored, lazy. There is no thread to them so they create their own conflicts and finally create a world full of it.Conflict against beasts and Monsters, conflict amongst sentient races, battles and treasure… and unimaginable dangers.That is NeoPangea. A continent where beasts unseen by the modern world roam. Follow the players in this world as a cataclysmic event challenges everything they knew about the world and a never seen before crisis befalls the planet.EDIT: I'm currently in my exam phase and very busy studying. Therefore I'm putting this novel on hold for now! But despair not! I shall be back!
8 114 - In Serial10 Chapters
The Love That Still Exists ✓
Dev and Sonakshi, two individuals who are quite opposite of each other, fall in love. They get engaged followed by their romance which was a bed of roses for them. But the thorns started hurting them and both decided to back off, thinking that the love that they had for each other exists no more! But will fate bind them together again as Dev's Parents insist? Or will they live their separate lives. Join Dev and Sonakshi in their journey of becoming Devakshi again.Loosely based on a Gujarati Movie.
8 154 - In Serial7 Chapters
A Dark Past
I read the Grishaverse duologies and don't know how to deal with it so this a piece of self service about Kaz finally telling his friends about his backstory. All rights and characters belong to the wonderful Leigh Bardugo.Takes place right after Rule of Wolves, so, spoiler alert. *also, I know the end of RoW was rather open ended but in this fanfic Hanne is trans and goes by he/him.*
8 133

