Tosra & The Auction, day 10

1 October.

Ego boost.

It took far to long to sleep last night, after Ciara absentmindedly said some things about Iselin, Kari and Jane, and I got worried as I realised that Kari and Jane are stuck on the same boat, with nothing to do for several weeks. So much time for Jane to leak information to Kari or work on cloth designs, but there is nothing I can do about it. It is already done. Accept reality, learn and move on. And I am likely to appreciate it in the end anyway, so I should be happy.

Still worries me.

It is nice that the barn has pretty much been completed, and many of the carpenters have started on Unn's house, what I call a 10x5 craftsman or artisan house due to its large extra rooms and other things, and when that house and the barn are completely finished, another 10x5 artisan house will be built down in the 'village' which will also get a small extra building in the back for what I call 'hot work'; ie casting, forging etc, according to Digraldi's guidelines.

I can do small things and basic iron forging inside my workshop's fireplace, but it is not ideal and already during the move in, it became clear that I need my own larger smithy and preferably a carpentry workshop near the mansion, even if it is simple, and the mansion also needs more space for animals, and it would be good with a small dairy and brewery. Not optimal to combine it in the same building, but after discussion with Iselin, Ciara, Ida, Elvira, Alith, the cook and Builder Pedr, a barn will be built in an east-west direction parallel to the first, so there will be a courtyard in between. The dairy and brewery will be on the northwest side and completely separated by a stone wall from the carpentry and smithy on the southwest side, and the middle and east side of the barn will be for animals. It will have a couple of pigstys and place for sheep for the winter, as well as hen houses and one for geese. The old barn will be changed a bit and have room for nicer carriages, horses and cows, and there will be an extra roof with a wall outside for anything else we need some weather protection for but which can be outside, like the first wagon we bought and firewood. If it gets really cold and it is needed, the smithy's chimney will help to make the animal section a little warmer, but we think that the animals' own heat can handle it well enough, because it usually doesn't get very cold here on the coast. Some winters there's just a few night below freezing. The barn walls will still be thick and relatively well insulated log walls. Jane might think Scandinavians take insulation way too serious, but being warm is nice and it is energy efficient.

The dairy and the brewing room will have floors made of porous ceramic tiles so that water evaporation can keep the rooms cooler, and there will mostly be stone floors with drainage in the rest to facilitate mucking out and drainage. The brewery gets a fireplace that also has brewing vessels, and the forge will have a with built-in air systems, double bellows and will share the chimney with the brewhouse. Definitely nothing advanced and a real modern blacksmith would surely laugh at the forge, but I needed something larger and better for simpler test work where I need to hammer hot iron without real demands on quality, and it is an important part of a farm in a world like this that they can make and mend tools. Every farm needs someone who can forge, and basic forging is considered something a man should know. The wood working part is for the same reason, but it will be well equipped with carpenter's bench, saws and other things they do not really use, and axes, planers, knives, etc, that they do use. In the future, I would like to equipped it with a simpler circular saw and wood lathe as well. Unfortunately, there is no suitable water nearby for a water wheel, but it may be a steam engine and the small fireplace in the carpentry shop is being prepared for it, but for now it will mainly be for warmth. Far into the future, it may be an electric motor driven solution.

Small windows that can be opened provide light for each part, and one of the extra water pipes under the road will be led on to the new barn for drinking water to all parts. The upper part of the whole barn becomes a large hayloft because we have so many animals to feed that we won't slaughter before the winter, and hay provides extra insulation. We will also store other things like wood and fire wood up there. The animals will grace outside for much of the winter as long as the weather allows, so I don't worry too much about feeding the animals here on the coast. Just like on the other barn, the terrain is used to provide easier access to the hayloft from the outside, and by lowering the northwest side of the barn into the ground instead of raising the southeast side more, the ground chill should also help keep the dairy and brewery cooler in summer. Stone walls even internally will stabilize the temperature more. Iselin, Ida and Rikvi are enthusiastic about how advanced the Dairy and Brewery seem to become, but there are quite a few who are. Making our own mead and cider is not seen as something negative by my staff and sambos. It is pretty much expected.

Caecilia definitely enjoy there only being Ciara, Alith and Hillevi beside us in the house, for most of the time. The maids spends most of their days in the wing or outside, and it is clear that Caecilia sees female guards or maids as something in the background to ignore - like furnitures - or she is just an exhibionist. Caecilia has also asked and understood that Ciara does not care if she goes seductively or enticingly dressed in here.

Caecilia has walked around very enticingly dressed since I accepted her yesterday, often in something thin and semi-transparent, or oh so flattering with a large neckline or deep V that is not completely closed, and she often stays close to me, ready to act as my personal servant if I want something done, and courtesan if I want her company or hear music or sagas.

So I find her lying down in my bed or on a sofa reading a book, embroidering or sewing on a dress, or sketching me by standing in the door dressed in something beautiful. Caecilia has been trying to learn to paint and draw from Jane since the first days, and practices a lot with slate but also on ink and paper. She comes with drinks and sometimes cookies or buns even if I did not ask for it, which is nice, and if I relax and listen to music in my bedroom, I discover her seductively on the couch and a while later, maybe sketching me, embroidering, reading or just being there - available regardless what I might wish from her.

Caecilia seems to think that her new role as my personal servant, excludeds her from my desire for alone time. Alith has a similar opinion, but allows me more seclusion and peace as long as I stay within the walls of the main building. But if I go to the wing for the toilet or down in the basement, she or some other guard just happen to be with me or close by. It makes me feel a bit like a guarded prisoner, but the guards try to be discreet and stay in the background. Caecilia is not discreet, but her new role as a personal servant is new to her.

I am convinced that Caecilia is trying to give me hints of what kind of wishes she prefer to hear, and trying to do the most that she only has Ciara as competition for a few days, and that it does not seem to irritate Ciara. Or she is trying to make me appreciate the luxury of having her 'available'. But Caecilia understand that I'm deliberately ignoring her hints. I just don't have her sexdrive, and it would be tiring even if she were my only partner - which is an unexpected disadvantage of having an young woman who seems to like having energetic wild sex at any time. No matter what she says, I can't just lie there and relax while she satisfy us. Was that why she was looking forward to my reputation? So I could match her sexdrive?

Krosp the cat seems to be doing well, and has already taken several mice outdoors and a couple of birds. As a small reward and to give the cat something that is okay to climb on, a simple climbing thingy 'cat tree' has been built by the carpenters. It is just a couple of thick standing branches de-barked with ropes wrapped around them, and a few platforms, mini hammock and nook to hide in on different levels, stabilized by fastering it to the wall. Okay, so there is a dangling ball too, and some of the platforms are fluffy. I still don't see why it is so funny, and I could do without Aliths smirk and comment that it will spoil the cat.

It was enough to lift Krosp up on one platform for the cat to realise the purpose, and where the 'cat tree' is located in a slightly wider part of the wing corridor opposite the maids room, it is not in the way, and Krosp can watch what happens and people walking by. The highest platform at 2.1m above ground seems to have become an instant favorite. Partly because I am the only one who reaches, and I respect not to disturb Krosp up there. We all want a bit of alone time.

After the evening meal, I sit in the study and work with Ciara. Ciara has started using the table against the wall behind me as her work surface for making copy of Kari's rewritten math book, and it is a good exercise in writing and getting it right. I hope she wants to make a copy of Karis Frigone's translation in the future as well. The light is better in my study and I currently have no use the place and it is closer to me. She wanted something to do and the books will be needed sooner or later anyway, and it will be a while before I can build a printing press, or I am motivated enough to start with that project. I still jump between projects, and mix crafting with writing stuff down, or making plans. I lean back, stretch my arms and loosen up my neck muscles with a little massage. Ciara soon replace my hands and gives me a kiss on the back of the neck.

When a hand dives into my pants and starts massaging there, it quickly turns out that it isn't Ciara, but Caecilia who 'takes matters into her own hands', and shortly afterwards I have her sitting contentedly sunken down on me in my lap with the lower part of her dress sweep to the side. Caecilia believes that slits on dresses should be high and on the side, to show more legs and 'be more convenient', and overlapping parts with buttons makes it even more convenient. One of the things she has done is sewing and modifying one of her everyday dresses that we is now testing. When she sits there in my arms and we enjoy each other's bodies, I realize there will probably be no more work done tonight. Caecilia is far too sexy, willing, skilled and beautiful, and it's hard to stop once we start.

It is only after a while I realize that Ciara is still in the room and have calmly continued to copy the math book. That is when I understand that it seems to have excited Caecilia who have watched Ciara while she rode me and I had my face against her mouth or breasts, but I take Caecilia into my bedroom after that, because it just feels so wrong.

I was assuming Ciara would sleep tonight in my bed again, but it feels so wrong to ask Caecilia to leave my bed, just so that Ciara can accompany me to sleep. Sure, the bed is big enough for three, but it still feels like I would wrong Ciara. I was going to take advantage of going down to the wing to brush my teeth, pee etc, and drag out the time a bit as an excuse for Caecilia to come along and leave the bedroom, but Ciara obliterate those plans when she comes in with a bowl and a mug of water so I can brush my teeth in here, and not forget it. It feels slightly absurd to hear Ciara reprimand Caecilia for not thinking about my health first, but giving her a compliment for doing 'her duty', before giving me a goodnight kiss, then leaving with the bowl and mug. Ciara probably would've been better as a personal servant.

Caecilia shines up and becomes happier when I ask if she wants to join me for the night. It still feels absurd and wrong that I - who is still me - can even ask such a beautiful young woman as Ciara or Caecilia if she wants to spend a night in my bed - with or without sex - and they won't ridicule me or be insulted, but instead reward me by seeing their happiness.

Eventually I will most likely get over my hangup and the slightly icky feeling that she is half my age, but it feels so very good to hold Caecilia and feel her lovely body when she cuddles up to me, and know that she right now is happy with life because she is here in bed with me. Caecilia is definitely an ego boost. Then again so is Ciara, Kari and Iselin.

I miss Iselin.