《The Demon's Gate》Chapter 382: The departure of fear.
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"The ship, can I assume that you know how to steer it?"
Yao Jun's gaze landed on Zhuan Yi as he spoke, bringing out the ship he took from Arthurius. It was honestly beyond easy to control the ship, he could even do it himself if he wanted to, but he was planning on learning something new so he wanted to give it his full attention.
"It's simple enough, just tell me where you want to go and how urgently we need to be there."
Zhuan Yi hadn't personally controlled the ship before, but she had seen Sirius do it while Yao Jun was cultivating. She'd also seen the map that Arthurius had provided for them, as long as they had that then it would be nigh-on impossible for them to get lost.
The World Tree planet, it ought to be the centre of the map. There's no need to rush the journey, I think I'll probably need a handful of days to understand them."
He didn't specify who or what he talked about, nor did Zhuan Yi feel like questioning it further, she had an inkling of an idea already. The two stepped onto the ship and Zhuan Yi left her mark on the core array, becoming the third person capable of controlling it.
"A little over two weeks if we maintain the slowest possible speed, that seems to be the time it'll take. If you haven't shown yourself by that time then I'll park the ship and wait, consider it my good grace."
She studied the map as she spoke, calculating the speed she had felt from the ship in the past. It really was a good ship, if she wanted to then they could reach the planet instantly by piercing through space, it would just take a bit more energy. It was just a shame that its offensive and defensive capabilities were a bit lacking when it came to opponents of their level.
"Good. I'll leave things here to you then."
Yao Jun spoke simply as he turned to leave for his room, but the implicit meaning in his words wasn't lost on Zhuan Yi. A life was left in her hands once again. Granted, if anyone arrived that was actually able to kill Yao Jun in a single blow with his surprise attack then it wouldn't matter much whether or not Zhuan Yi was there.
He sat down on his bed when he finally arrived in his room, crossing his legs as he closed his eyes. He pulled back the bits of his consciousness that lingered outside his universe, or universes at this point, and gathered them all together into a single avatar that landed on one of the planets.
"Xuhuan."
His gaze, infused with a gentle trace of warmth, lingered on the small fox in front of him, her burnt orange fur adorned by a stripe of yellowish-white that went all the way down to her two fluffy tails. He must have caught her slightly off-guard since she jumped when he spoke, but he turned his head slightly before she could open her mouth.
"Yong Bo. Sirius. Zhuyin. Ba-Shei. Yama. You guys come over here too."
Each name was spoken slowly and carefully, each name was dear to him. And each time he said a name, a small stream of energy left him and pulled the respective companion over. He had arrived alone, but before long he was surrounded by the companions he had painstakingly gathered up over time.
"My Lord, has something happened?"
Xuhuan was the one who spoke, her small eyes narrowed somewhat. Yao Jun wasn't quite sure why, but she and Zhuyin were the ones most proficient at speaking the human language. Yama, Ba-Shei, and Yong Bo weren't even capable of speaking yet, despite two of them having technically been Origin Beasts longer.
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"Little Thunder."
Yao Jun pushed aside what he didn't understand and sat down, bringing out the crystal that once housed the remnants of Little Thunder's soul. He carefully placed it on the soft grass, his companions either curling up or sitting down as they understood that it was time for them to listen.
"When I first met him, he was my enemy. A weak tiger and an even weaker human, we didn't even hesitate before we tried to kill each other. In the end, I came out on top and took his life. That was my first meeting with him. Gods, it feels like it took place lifetimes ago."
He remembered it clear as day, the thumping of his heart, the pain in his body from the wounds, the fear of death. He met a beast and he killed a beast, awakening his powers in the process.
"As you can probably imagine, he became part of my gate after I killed him. My first companion, my first power, my first weapon. It's funny, isn't it? My first companion, who I treasured as a friend, I was the first one to kill him, I didn't even give him a choice in following me, not until much later on."
The freedom to follow, the freedom to live their own lives, Yao Jun gave that freedom to all of his companions. Naturally, he didn't start out like that, he just slowly grew into that mindset over time. And in the end, only those who wanted to follow him ended up staying with him. He was happy about that, they believed in him so they followed him. But he had become complacent, and thus there was an important thing he had neglected.
"He was the first, whether he wanted to be or not. He spent the most time with me, and I spent the most time with him. But... But in the end, even though he believed in me, even though he fought for me and had faith in me, I never understood him. When he slept at night, what did he dream of? When he raised his head to the sky, what was reflected in his eyes? When he looked at the world, what did he want to see? From start to finish... I never understood him."
His finger rested on the cold crystal, his voice barely a mutter as he finished talking. The tip of his finger trailed across the crystal as if he sought some form of answer from it, but now it was nothing more than a Demon Crystal so it would never answer him. He raised his head, his finger slowly sliding off of the crystal.
"But I want to understand you. What you think, what you dream, what you desire, what you hate. You and your world, I want to understand them."
They said that they would follow him, they said that they would pave the path to godhood for him. But was that all? Was that all they dreamed of, was that what their world revolved around? No, living beings were never that simple, there was always more. He had neglected it in the past, but no more. Starting from today, he would understand those who gave him their faith.
A lull of silence fell over the group after Yao Jun finished talking. Were they unsure on how to answer, or was it because they didn't know what they could actually share? Yao Jun didn't rush them, didn't tell them what to say, he simply looked at them quietly. And in the end, the first one to speak up was Xuhuan.
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"Xuhuan Laoshi. That was my husband's name. He was originally Xulong Laoshi, but he wanted to signify a new start for us when we got together so we merged our last names into Xuhuan and departed from our past. Do you remember him? He was what you called a Horrid beast."
The past, before she met and joined Yao Jun. For the first time, Xuhuan spoke of the time when she was at her happiest, as well as her greatest despair. She didn't need to hear his answer, she didn't even need to see him nod his head to know that he remembered. He had never interacted with her husband and they had only seen each other in passing, but she was sure that he remembered.
"He was a tired man. He was strong, but he was just tired of all the fighting that came with being a Horrid Beast, all the fighting that came with being born in a world like this. That forest... it was our sanctuary. We could live there in peace and never be bothered, there was no reason to fight or bleed. I... Didn't understand him. Why he was tired of fighting despite being strong. He always won so it should have been enjoyable. But after I got your assistance and killed those who took him from me, I started to understand. It's tiresome to always fight, even if you always win. It's tiresome that there's a need for it, it's tiresome that it's everywhere."
Divine Beast, a title saved for the most elated species. Origin Beasts were above them, but how rare was an Origin Beast? They could not be counted because people could go multiple lifetimes without ever meeting one. As such, Divine Beasts were the peak, something they took great pride in. They fought tirelessly to maintain that pride, to show the world that they were at the peak for a reason.
So, Xuhuan could not understand the tired beast that just wanted to rest, not at first at least. But in the end, she could look at everything clearly. It was tiring. Constantly fighting, constantly worrying about those around you, constantly worrying that this might be the end. How great wouldn't it be if they could just avoid all the fighting and live their lives as peaceful slackers?
"I... I want to make a world where people like him could have lived. A home for the tired, a place of rest for the weary. When there are those who no longer want to fight, I want to be able to give them a place to go, a place where they can get their peace."
Xuhuan Huo, Queen of Elements.
She spoke earnestly, quietly but resolute. How long had she carried these ambitions? How long had she kept quiet and fought for her lord? She was tired of the fighting, just like her husband had been, but she kept fighting. Everywhere Yao Jun went there was fighting, it was just like her husband always said. But just like her husband, even though she was tired, she kept on fighting. Because in the end, she believed in the man who was right now looking at her.
"SShhh."
Once Xuhuan finished her story, a hissing sound piped up to fill the silence. Yao Jun's gaze moved onto the source, the small black snake with a split lower jaw. Ba-Shei. He couldn't talk right now, but he was the Origin Beast of Yao Jun's universe, he was also one of his companions, so Yao Jun could understand him even without words.
Ba-Shei. That was the name Yao Jun had given him, but just where had he come from? At first, he was just a snake, a normal snake that could be found anywhere, he didn't even have Qi. But he was born in a dark pit, the act of slithering out from his mother's corpse was his first memory.
There was no fresh food in that dark pit, but there were plenty of corpses. So he gorged on the rotting flesh, the bleached bones and leather-like scales. Even his mother's corpse had to be eaten if he wanted to survive. And as he survived, the energy within the darkness seeped into him, twisted him.
Slowly, over what felt like lifetimes to the small snake, it became that pit. The darkness that covered it, the hunger that lingered in the air since there was no fresh food, he had become that rotten pit devoid of hope. And on that day, he fled from his birthplace. So, what did that dark and dreary pit dream of?
The answer, it could be seen as either surprising or expected. He dreamed of light, and of food. A world where there was no dark pit, a world where no children gorged on rotten corpses, on their own mothers. A world where the newborn could live in the light and eat as much fresh food as they liked. That was what the dark pit dreamed of, the emperor of darkness only wanted there to be light.
Ba-Shei, Serpent Emperor of Darkness.
"'Someday, someone will surely appear that will take you away and let you fry freely'. Those were the last things my father told me before I got sealed within the ice where you found me. If... If he didn't seal me then I would die within that broken world, I would never get to see the wider world, and I would die ignorant. I am glad that he sealed me, I am glad that you took me away, that you let me see the world."
"But it's sad, don't you think? How many others are there? Hidden Realms, fractured spaces, remains of God Gates, prisons lost to time. There must be more than I can count, and in them there will be even more beings locked away, unable to see the world. I think... I think it would be nice if there was a world where such things didn't exist, I think everyone deserves the chance to fly and see the world at least once."
Zhuyin, Empress of the Molten World.
Yama was born of blood, a simple weed that grew thanks to the immense number of corpses Yao Jun had dumped in one spot. Their blood fertilized him, their energy aided his growth. And then he was finally born and could greet the one who made his birth possible. But everywhere he went, the flower of carnage bloomed. Blood painted the world the same shade as the rose, there were probably many more like him that had been born as time went on and Yao Jun's journey got longer.
There were always screams, tears that wet the earth as much as the blood. Yama lived on this blood, it birthed him and it fed him. So he felt the tears all the more clearly, the sorrow of the departed, the grief of those left behind, the pain of those fighting. How painful it was, both for those who fell and those who bloomed in that despair. There was beauty there, but none could appreciate it, none could ever gaze upon it without sorrow. How beautiful wouldn't it be if there was a world where all the roses could bloom without the carnage, a world where people could adore the flowers without feeding them blood and tears?
Yama, The Rose of the End.
Yong Bo was a hydra, a beast that some would consider rarer than a Divine Beast. In fact, there was a chance that he may be the last of his kind, that was how rare Hydra's were in this time. They could evolve without end, they could grow without end, they were something people both feared and desired at the same time. So they hunted them, if they couldn't get them as pets then they would kill them. And slowly but surely, their numbers dwindled. By the time Yong Bo ended up in the tower where he met Yao Jun, it had already been many years since he last saw one of his own kind.
But... But he saw hope when that youth returned for him, when he reached out his hand. A world free of persecution, a world where his kind, where no one of any kind, were hunted to be used as pets. In a world like that he could look for traces of other hydras, he could slowly but surely help his race back on its feet. And then, then they could live as family, without having to worry about being hunted.
Yong Bo, King of the Depths.
"For one Sky Wolf to be born, another must die. When a pair of Sky Wolves gets pregnant, one must pour all their energy and lifeforce into the womb, otherwise, the infant will die. And almost immediately after being born, the Sky Wolf will leave its birth parent. They are Divine Beasts, proud and solitary, unable to even shed a tear for the one that sacrificed it all for them. And I... I thought that it was just fine to live like that, that was just how we were meant to be."
"But then I met you. You accepted me and took me away, and you brought me into the wide world alongside your other companions. I... I was happy. With you, with them. There was always fighting, there was sorrow quite a few times too, but in the end, I was always happy. It was fun to be with you. I can't help but wonder, would it have been like that if I hadn't left my mother after I was born?"
"I think it's sad that the world is a place where some races will give up on each other and just live alone, abandoning family and friends just because of pride or instinct. I think the world should be a place where everyone wants to be together, where they ignore instinct and pride in favour of being with those who make them happy."
Sirius, Howl of the Nine Winds.
Xuhuan Huo. Ba-Shei. Zhuyin. Yama. Yong Bo. Sirius. One by one they spoke of the world they desired, the dreams they saw at night. They dreamed of what they hadn't had, dreamed of what was the opposite of them. The worlds they desired were the worlds they hadn't been able to live in. Yao Jun had listened to them all, engraved each word into his being so that he could understand them. And when they were done talking, it was his time, his time to speak, and his time to reach out his hand.
"I... I am a selfish man. I fear for those close to me and can abandon those who aren't. Sometimes I'll reach out my hand, but if it endangers my family then I can just as easily ignore everyone else. I want to live in a world where my family can be at peace, where I don't have to worry about them with every step I take. I think it would be nice if I could live in a world where I could freely reach out my hand because there is no longer anything I need to fear."
Fear, how long had that emotion driven Yao Jun? How many years had that painful emotion been what pushed him to greater heights, and deeper depths? But in the end, using such a painful emotion to drive yourself was wrong, it would just be a burden on those around you, it would end up fuelling itself. And that was why he stretched out his hand, why he offered it to his companions.
"I am weak right now, unworthy. But your dreams, your desires, your worlds, give them to me. I will become worthy of you, I'll make them real. So please, help me make mine real."
Help. It was a word Yao Jun didn't utter often, it was a plea he didn't make often, his fear didn't allow him to use things he couldn't completely trust or control. But still, he asked for help. And those six companions he had reunited with, and probably the others he would meet up with in the future, without fail they all reached out to grab that hand in their own way.
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8 97Father Laff Q&A
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