《Bob's Ascension to Godhood》028: Punch in the face
Advertisement
Soanso frowned as he read another name.
"Boob Simpleton and Ector Inowutimdoing!"
Bob sighed.
"Sir, I think that may be me."
Soanso frowned as he looked at the list.
"Yes, that probably is you, since this is the last match of round one."
Bob groaned.
Of course his was last.
[ For being paired with the strongest mage in your class, you have earned 1302 minor karma points! ]
...Sh*tnizzle.
"...How do I get up on the stage?"
Soanso sighed.
"You must have some means to get up on the stage, right?"
"...No, I do not."
Soanso sighed again.
"Arthur, please get your useless garbage apprentice on the stage."
Arthur's face flushed red and Bob looked away.
Arthur raised a hand and Bob splatted face first on the stage.
The crowd laughed.
Bob sighed as he got up.
Of course he embarrassed his master on his first day.
Soanso facepalmed and sighed.
"Battle start in..."
"Three..."
Ector raised his hands, probably to cast some sort of large spell.
"Two..."
Bob raised his hands and managed to stop himself from tripping over his own feet.
"One..."
A spark of purple appeared on Ector's hand.
"Fight!"
Ector started drawing a purple diagram in front of him while Bob watched, dumbfounded.
"I call upon the angry seas,
The raging storms,
The creature that sees.
I call upon the..."
Bob quickly mentally facepalmed as he realized that he was just watching and doing nothing as the mage in front of him was probably chanting an insta-death spell.
"Terrifyicreetur, come and..."
Bob sprinted forward and punched Ector in the face.
Ector got a broken nose and the backlash of the spell as he flew off the stage and landed in a mangled heap on the ground.
Advertisement
The crowd gasped.
"That was..."
Bob sighed. He was supposed to use magic, wasn't he?
"He used the Ultra Turbo Super Mega Divine God's Fist Nose Shattering Face Exploding Pow Pow Pow Face Punch, the famed secret technique of the Pow Pow Pow Pow Pow Pow Pow Pow Pow Blammy Punch Fist sect!"
The what now?
"He actually managed to use the Ultra Turbo Super Mega Divine God's Fist Nose Shattering Face Exploding Pow Pow Pow Face Punch, the famed secret technique of the Pow Pow Pow Pow Pow Pow Pow Pow Pow Blammy Punch Fist sect!"
Huh?
"How the cluck did he manage to get the Ultra Turbo Super Mega Divine God's Fist Nose Shattering Face Exploding Pow Pow Pow Face Punch, the famed secret technique of the Pow Pow Pow Pow Pow Pow Pow Pow Pow Blammy Punch Fist sect, from the Pow Pow Pow Pow Pow Pow Pow Pow Pow Blammy Punch Fist sect?!!"
Ultra Turbo Super Mega Divine God's Fist Nose Shattering Face Exploding Pow Pow Pow Face Punch... Secret technique... Pow Pow Pow Pow Pow Pow Pow Pow Pow Blammy what now?
"As expected of my new apprentice, he can already use the Ultra Turbo Super Mega Divine God's Fist Nose Shattering Face Exploding Pow Pow Pow Face Punch, the famed secret technique of the Pow Pow Pow Pow Pow Pow Pow Pow Pow Blammy Punch Fist sect! Soanso, I told you he was talented!"
The...What...
"Yes, fine, Arthur, I believe you now, but how did he manage to get the Ultra Turbo Super Mega Divine God's Fist Nose Shattering Face Exploding Pow Pow Pow Face Punch, the famed secret technique of the Pow Pow Pow Pow Pow Pow Pow Pow Pow Blammy Punch Fist sect, from the Pow Pow Pow Pow Pow Pow Pow Pow Pow Blammy Punch Fist sect?!"
The... What the heck...This... What?
Advertisement
- In Serial244 Chapters
The Demon Lord And His Hero
When Demon Lord, Syryn Nigh'hart, found that he had gone back in time and turned into his child self, he had assumed to do better with his second life. Commit smaller crimes, keep away from burning villages and inciting other demons, contribute to society, abide by most laws, you know? But then the hero, his old friend, had to fall in love with him and ruin his plans.
8 223 - In Serial25 Chapters
Paper's Cat
Adam, a cat, but not by choice, follows along Hannah disguised as her faithful familiar. Cursed with next to no hope for a cure, hopping from one human caretaker to the next, this trapped feline's only hope is that the phrase 'time heals all wounds' applies to being polymorphed. Suffering a condition that makes her magically lame, Hannah struggles to pass as a professional mage because of her need for the learning wheels other students her age have long since shed. Determined not to be denied her right to magic owed to her by her witch heritage, she refuses to die until she is recognised as a great, if not, the greatest mage to have ever lived. However success is never easy for the disadvantaged. Black cats and bad luck come hand in hand. And the abandonned Cathedral of the Triolo academy will cast a very large shadow over them all.
8 218 - In Serial74 Chapters
Rebirth: My Sassy 'Crown Princess'
"You mean that Prince Yu wants to marry me?" "Exactly, young master, Prince Yu wants to marry you!" "Hell no! Is he out of his mind? Even if woman is a rare species nowadays, as the prince, he could have a chance to marry one. Is it because he got excluded, or maybe he has sexual impotence, so he could only marry a man?" "No, Prince Yu is charming, majestic, endowed with civil and martial virtues, and also in perfect health." "Then why would he marry me?" "Maybe because of your reputation out there." "Reputation? Am I quite famous?" "Of course. Young master, you're far-famed." "Really? What did they say about me?" "They said you are ugly, good-for-nothing, short-lived, a freak, with no morals, and shameless…" Welcome to read the whole Rebirth: My Sassy 'Crown Princess' on Flying Lines.
8 182 - In Serial9 Chapters
2nd Floor
Matthias is a struggling writer finally able to move into his first solo apartment. He's thrilled to have a place free of roommates and siblings, even though the building is decrepit and is inhabited by an odd assortment of people including an intrusive neighbor, a little girl who wanders freely, and an overweight orange cat named Cheese. As Matthias settles in things begin getting stranger. Something vile is growing in the dark and it's coming from somewhere on the second floor... where Matthias happens to live.Author's note: this is me trying to get back to my roots: a character driven novella with horror elements. The story of people struggling against an inscrutable enemy, as well as the day to day trials of being poor in America. I have no idea how often I'll update or even exactly how this will all go down because y'girl is a panster. So strap in because this is the first draft and you all get to see it being born!Feel free to comment whatever comes to mind, and helpful critiques are always welcome.
8 208 - In Serial73 Chapters
Helluva Harem
Your name is Y/n. You're 22 living alone in a run down building with shitty neighbors and a even shittier landlord. Due to the boredoms of life and lack of human interaction you decide to commit suicide knowing nothing can get better. Or so you think.(First 3 chapters take place before the pilot)(Bisexual male reader story)
8 319 - In Serial152 Chapters
Poems from the soul
As the title says, its a poem book :)All poems are based on my life, inspirations from the songs i listen or things i watch and my views on different topics."Dreams come true to those who truly want them"-Said by Stray kidsI hope you enjoy my writings, have a nice day!Best Rankings#1 in poem on 28/9/22#11 in poetry on 15/9/22#37 in poems on 16/9/22 #5 in poembook on 29/9/22 #5 in poetrycollection on 21/9/22
8 196
Prev Chap
Next Chap
Chap List
Boy
Girl
