《Killing Cockroaches In Xianxia For Self-Preservation》1. A Life Of Misfortune
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(In a Hospital, Somewhere)
A twenty-ish year old young man could be seen laying on a hospital bed.
He's clearly had better days before as currently he was strung up to multiple sketchy looking machines that all had a little indicator which each had the job of expressing ranges of different values which only a doctor could somewhat decipher- It was basically denoting the young man's entire being into numerical values that would eventually be good 'analytical data', or at least that's what all those snobby doctors had told him.
Speaking of his body, it was in such a grave condition that even a blind man could tell he was deep into the grim reaper's embrace.
His skin was so pale that even vampires, that had been portrayed to be severe vitamin D deficients, could only concede to his current levels of paleness.
All the lustrous and thick black hair on his head, one of the things he took great pride in, had long fallen out and only a shiny bald head was left behind.
The meat on him was gone, along with whatever muscle had once had, and all that remained was just a frail and bony man- But hey! At least he hit an all time low in body fat percentage...
And all this could be described from looking at his outer appearance- Trust me, you do not want to know the piles of medical reports which, funnily enough, reported his entire internal structure that was collapsing.
So to sum it all up in one neat expression, 'He was one foot in the grave', and it was a miracle he was still in the realm of the living!
And wouldn't you know it, this is Bu Cai- The hero of this story if you didn't catch it from the synopsis.
The blank and empty look in his eyes currently, almost perfectly portrayed how colourful and great his life was.
He was someone who was left in an orphanage by his parents as a baby.
So naturally he grew as an orphan.
Except from that fact, and some difficulties with bullying at the start- Everything wasn't all too bad for him.
His attitude and academic competence that both vastly excelled his peers- this was shown from his excellent exam results and reports from his teachers about his outstanding behavior- set him up nicely for a scholarship and furthermore, a bright future.
He put in seemingly endless hours in extracurricular activities and studying, but still had a friend group that he grew close to throughout his school years.
He used to go to sleep looking forward for the following day!
But this all changed when he reached the age of eighteen.
At this age he was made to enter the harsh real world, were the the government no longer covered his living expenses and there was no one to help him cope with this transition- But this in itself wasn't the main issue.
What really made him feel despair, was when he found out all his hard work was for naught and his hopes of a great future were but an delusion.
And the cause of this downfall and tragedy?
A son of the local tycoon was the one who had crumbled his path to success, by snatching his scholarship off him like stealing a candy from a baby...
And the reason why he could do this whilst being completely inferior to Bu Cai in almost every aspect?
Connections.
His father, who was a mega rich entrepreneur with a large network of contacts, just casually made a phone call and arranged the scholarship to be awarded to his son because it helped with his face and reputation.
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This truly put into perspective for Bu Cai that diligence would not always be rewarded.
Bu Cai hadn't even received hush money or any other opportunities as he was merely some abandoned orphan with nothing to rely on- So what sort of qualms or waves could he ever make?
And they had made the right call there, as Bu Cai truly didn't have any form of backup or assistance.
He could do absolutely nothing against this injustice, than to turn to superstition and start cursing the filthy cheater's entire family for a while. Sadly no concrete results were produced.
And due to these sudden turn of events, he was left with no other choice but to give up on the dreams of higher education and started slaving away on part time shifts in a variety of places to sustain himself financially...
However the world seemed to have a vendetta against his poor self as shortly after getting a decent job... He would be fired!
One instance of this happening was his very first job- Stocking the shelf in a local supermarket.
Through some absurd coincidence he slipped on something and lost his footing whilst carrying a box that contained glass jars of sausages.
Naturally they were dropped and smashed...
...But nothing that can't be fixed with a few paper towels and an apology, Right?
WRONG
By some freak coincidence, the juices splashed out on a vegan that was just coincidentally walking through that isle!
And coincidentally that woman was the owner of a facebook group consisting of people who hated the idea of meat with a passion that burned stronger than the sun!
So the karen ended up complaining to the manager furiously about how her rights had brutally violated, and demanded Bu Cai to be reprimanded and locked up for such misdemeanor.
After a while of back and forth arguing, the manager was getting annoyed with how this was getting to nowhere and didn't honestly care much about booting the newbie.
So Bu Cai was told to get out.
Bu Cai immediately tried to fight for his case as this was utter nonsense but the manager said that regardless of how much he pleaded, there was coincidentally a camera with HD quality that caught the whole thing in 4k.
NOTICE ALL THE COINCIDENCES!?
So he was told to take responsibilities for his actions and leave.
Bu Cai eventually gave in and left. He just brushed this off as a one time stroke of misfortune.
...
Unfortunately for him, ridiculous incidents like this repeated again and again, until he reached his 64th job- By then he had long realised that this wasn't a one time stroke of misfortune, but much rather a vicious curse that haunted him.
And the notion of this being a curse further solidified as throughout his time of getting fired constantly, he'd collected and compiled all 64 unique, and hideously, dogshit reasons of why he got fired and wrote them on sticky notes, and kept them as a reminders of how cruel the world was.
One day after searching for a job to no avail, it had been night time and he was on his way back to his cramped cage-like apartment that was definitely not meeting the safety standards set by the law, and had no heating at all, feeling depressed.
The only reason he had decided to strive on and hadn't ended himself- even though he was in such horrible circumstances- was due to the fact that him and his stubborn personality wanted to get back at this shitty world, that was against him since day one, in any way he possibly could.
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However another tragedy befell him, once again.
That night on the way home he was feeling particularly unwell, so he said fuck it and went for a check-up.
At most he was expecting something which was inconvenient but minor, like food poisoning from all the cheap trash food that he had been eating and was bound to be contaminated.
However his expectations were trumped, as he was informed to have a terminal illness that eats away at the patients health slowly, but surely.
He was absolutely mortified, but he was mainly mortified over the humongous prices for the treatment for prolonging the inevitable- which he definitely could not afford- rather than the actually notion of having this unavoidable death sentence.
He kept thinking about how these devious scammers were just planning to drain him of everything he's worked hard for and saved up over the years, under the guise of a 'hopeful treatment'.
What bullshit.
He wasn't going to fall for that- nor did he have the finances to do so- so he instantly refused the long term treatment that was just a money drain, and booked himself up for just being monitored in the hospital.
So there he wasted away the rest of his savings being tied up to machines in hopes that it was a misdiagnosis or something...
...It wasn't.
As the weeks passed by, he slowly and painfully deteriorated.
From the moment he lost the ability to walk, he confidently concluded that earth had now been sick of his stubbornness and decided send him to hell personally.
...
Now here we are at the current day, and the final day, of Bu Cai's life.
Although he had no solid evidence of this being the particular day being THE DAY.
He had felt that he'd guessed it right- He'd even call it a gut instinct, if it hadn't already been removed last week.
Now going over his psyche over this period of time... It was horrendous at best.
Bu Cai was not someone who hadn't had his fair share of mental breakdowns, but this one had been the worst- By far.
Just knowing that this god forsaken illness was gnawing away the one thing he thought couldn't be taken from him- his life- was complete agony, and that's not putting into perspective the sheer pain he had felt due to it.
It didn't help that the mundane and monotonous hospital room felt more like a jail cell than a place where someone was to recover.
Also... Absolutely no one had visited him once- Not like he really expected anyone to.
His friends from back in high school?
What a joke.
Back when he was in high school he didn't know about their true faces. He was a complete fool to actually think they were real friends who would stick with him for life, as one they found out he had absolutely no future prospects they all cut him out.
His once lively phone that often buzzed with messages like 'You wanna eat out at a new place in restaurant this weekend with 'X' and 'Y', it's on us' or 'Z found a new place to hang out, want to join us?' had become empty and he was kicked out of the shared group chat.
Never once had they again cared about him or his well being, even when he saw them about outside, they would act like they didn't know Bu Cai or laugh at him because of his cheap and overused clothes.
He felt betrayed and angry at first. But soon became numb to it.
...
...His parents that abandoned him and never looked back?
Another funny one.
If this was one of those CEO webnovel stories then he would get fetched back after a few years and realise he was the illegitimate child of some rich family... But reality was different.
He hadn't even tried to get in contact with them again as he was certain they were unenthusiastic about seeing him, the trash they had resolutely left at the orphanage, again.
So he had long given up on stupid and unrealistic fantasies of them coming back for him.
...
...
...A girlfriend?
PFFFFFFFFT, are you a comedian or something?
Girls naturally avoided him like a plague for seemingly no reason.
He speculated it was due to a certain stench of immense poverty that has rubbed off on him, or that his EX-rated bad luck was being super effective in this area.
He had no clue why people of the opposite gender just despised him.
And he wasn't one to brag or anything, but his looks were definitely handsome.
He even believed that if he had the chance to get himself in shape, eat healthy and nutritious food, then he could even become an actor or model... But he mainly focused on studies and once he even had the chance to think about something other than studying hard, he was broke.
So of course he was a single dog!
...
And finally, the time had come.
His eyelids started to feel heavier, and his felt himself get even weaker- which he thought was impossible.
Although his hearing was also garbage now, he could still slightly catch the beep of the different machines that were probably indicating that just about everything was decaying and failing on him.
He didn't even fight it, instead he shut his with all his energy- yes, even this was hard to do.
With him now being in darkness as his eyes were closed, he couldn't help but think back to only bit of solace in this miserable life of his...
...Webnovels.
Mainly the Xianxia novels.
You know which ones they are... right?
The novels where the protagonist must overcome numerous hardships through the power of his sheer will and plot arm- *cough* unparalleled talents!
The novels where the main character, and hero of the story, marks his name in the annals of time by reaching heights never reached before on the path of the cultivation, whilst they assert domina- *cough* teach multiple arrogant young masters on how to spell! - Mainly they tutor on how to write the word, 'Death'.
And all this exciting adventure, plus sprinkling on a grand harem of heaven-destroying beauties just because why not?!
If such a thing couldn't make Bu Cai's blood boil, he wouldn't be able to call himself a man!
And so with this exhilaration, he read the thousands and thousands of chapters of various Xianxia, listing some such as,
-'Emperor's Damnation'
-'With The Gods'
-And even 'Preach Through The Heavens'...
Whilst thinking of these works that are synonymous with his joyful times...
...A sudden realisation dawns on Bu Cai.
...
He hadn't been able to catch up with the latest chapter of 'The Reincarnation Of The The Heavenly Sovereign Emperor Dragon God That Will Reach The Apex This Time'!
...
Regret flooded him instantaneously as he began to die.
In his last few seconds, he mournfully lamented over why his vicious misfortune wouldn't even allow him to die peacefully!
Then all that remained in the empty and lifeless hospital room was the monotone and mechanical sound of,
"Beeeeeeeeeeeeeep"
...Which came from the machines, that coincidentally were all broken therefore couldn't send a signal to the doctors.
...
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