《I AM NPC69》Chapter 24.
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Chapter 24.
Once the dust finally settled and the fight was over we lost interest and stopped watching. It had already moved onto its next program. It was a bland fight between a hero and a weak army of demons in some other world that we couldn’t care less for.
When Yin turned around on my lap to face me, I noticed her cheeks were wet.
“Tears? I thought you can’t cry.”
“I can’t help it, I was just so moved by Xander’s captivating tear-jerker story which pulled at one’s heartstrings. It seems I have somehow suddenly gained the ability to cry after watching his desperate struggle against that vile woman called White.” Her tone of voice was as monotone as could be while her eyes showed not a single sign of being moved in the slightest.
“Right, and what’s the real story?”
“It’s the eye drops I use every time to fake tears when you’re leaving to make my subordinates think badly of you and spread nasty rumors. I thought if I unleashed a woman’s most powerful secret trump card, ‘A Lady’s Tears’ that it might somehow awaken your most primitive carnal desires. Well, did it work?”
“Do you want me to throw you out the window again?”
“Haaaah. Tch.” She sighed then clicked her tongue as she averted her eyes to the side expressionlessly.
“Anyway, it looks like your body belongs to me now.”
“What are you talking about? You can hardly say that you won. Xander didn’t die, neither did White. Isn’t this more of a draw?”
“A draw? Hmm… I guess you’re right. Really, such a shame. I planned to really put that body of yours to work and do all sorts of interesting things with it.”
“All sorts of interesting things? Like?” She shot me a suspicious glance from the corner of her eyes with her head turned to the side.
“They’re unspeakable things I don’t dare say aloud. Even speaking of them is too sinful and I fear the devs may delete me should they find out.”
“Well… now that I think about it, White was certainly guaranteed to win that fight. In good conscience, I can’t weasel out of a bet. If I did, my name as the Greater Demon God would go down the drain. My promises would have no weight if I didn’t fulfill my end of a bet.”
“Oh? Are you sure?”
“Yeah.”
“Then this bet isn’t a draw and I’m the winner?”
“That’s what I said, don’t make me repeat myself.”
“Hahaha. That’s great, I really didn’t want to settle on a draw and besmirch my undefeated win streak with a tie of all things.”
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“Wait just a minute. You’re not going to tell me it was your win streak you were most concerned about than the actual prize, are you?”
“Of course it was my win streak. The prize comes second. Winning is all that matters.” My expression was the textbook definition of a condescending scumbag when I said that.
“I’m… going to sleep.” Yin kicked me out from under the blanket and wrapped herself up inside. Only her face was visible again as she returned to her natural caterpillar form. Inside the safety of her impenetrable blanket shell, her eyes locked onto me. Her stare was one that screamed she’d kill me if she was ever presented the opportunity.
“Well, I do intend to make good use of that body of yours in the near future, so that much was true.”
“Hmmp!” She shunned me.
“Oh, would you look at the time, it’s gotten pretty late already. I’m going to head over to the bar for a drink. You want anything?”
“...”
“Guess not… haha. See you later then.”
It was a bit awkward with her staring at me so intensely, so I used Escape. Yes, Great Master Bokemon has taught me well.
“Running away? Coward. If you’re going to use my body to fulfill your lustful desires, then just do it. I dare you.” She grumbled to herself as I shut the door behind me.
I ignored her and diligently went to the bar as part of my daily routine to drown myself in beer as per the usual.
It didn’t take long before I arrived. I sat down in my usual seat and quickly downed a few beers.
“You’ve been acting a bit different over the last two weeks, has something happened to you lately?” With a mug of beer held up to my mouth, Ria abruptly interrupted my drinking session and suddenly struck up a conversation with me from behind the counter.
“Nothing much.” My eyes rose from my beer and I calmly answered.
“It sure doesn’t seem like it’s nothing much. You’ve been drinking a lot more than usual.”
“You actually keep track of how much I drink on a daily basis?”
“Yeah. I’m having a hard time trusting my instincts on the cause behind this sudden change. My woman’s intuition is telling me it's related to troubles with a woman, but my brain just can’t seem to accept that when I consider it’s you.”
Woman’s intuition sure is a terrifying ability. Please nerf devs.
“A woman? You think there really exists such a woman?”
“I don't, which is why I can’t believe that my woman’s intuition is telling me this.”
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Ria moved directly in front of me on the opposite side of the counter. She rested her elbow on top of the counter and propped up her cheek with her hand while looking directly into my eyes. “You want to talk about it? I’m all ears for juicy gossip like this you know.” She smirked at me showing visible interest in my nonexistent love life.
“Well, you see. I’ve actually fallen for a certain barista, but she doesn’t seem to realize it.”
“Liar.” She rolled her eyes.
“Did you abduct a woman and lock her up inside your room or something and you’re now troubled because you don’t know what to do with her?”
… woman’s intuition, please nerf.
“Haha. You sure have a wild imagination.” I kept my eyes locked onto her, not averting them in the slightest from her eyes.
“Is it really so wild? When a man hits rock bottom, I wouldn’t be surprised if he would resort to something like that.”
“It’s definitely wild. I’m not so low that I would resort to something like that.”
She leaned a bit closer over the counter, her chest was more pronounced, now in my direct line of sight.
“Is that so?”
My jaw slackened a bit as the cigar I held between my lips tilted down at an angle when I opened my mouth and responded, “Yeah.”
She raised her free hand up, positioned the far end of the cigar in my mouth between her index and middle finger then she slid them along the side of the cigar closer toward my lips. Her fingers lightly pressed against my lips before her hand pulled the cigar out of my mouth. She placed it between her lips and took in a breath.
“You really should stop stealing your customer’s cigars.”
She puckered her lips and exhaled the smoke slowly blowing it into my mouth before she responded, “I only steal from my uncharming customers. Though I only have one such uncharming customer.”
“Haha. You really know how to keep your customers coming back.”
“Well, it’s just a bit of lip service. You already know how it is.”
“Yeah.”
“By the way, where are those heroes now? Do you know? Did you watch the broadcast earlier on the Hero network? They just disappeared into thin air after that lightning strike.”
“Your guess is as good as mine. But I suspect they’ll be back soon.”
“It was quite an interesting fight though. Who knew that they’d defeat their first Demon Lord all the while unaware of his status as a Demon Lord. What are you going to do about it?”
“Well, they’ll still have to fight him again as part of the main storyline whenever they trigger it.”
She exhaled another breath of smoke close to my face, “They sure are slow.”
“Are you that much in a rush to get rid of me? You know you’ll lose a customer for some time if I have to go with them and leave the beginner village.”
“Maybe the hero will seduce a certain barista and she’ll end up joining his party.”
“Oh? Then I could get my drinks from that barista even when we’re on the road. That might not be such a bad idea.”
She twirled her hair around her finger in the hand she held the cigar.
“You still don’t want to talk about your woman troubles?”
“You know, I don’t like women that pry and are too nosy.”
She leaned even closer until our faces were only centimeters apart. Her eyes half-closed, she asked, “Is that so?”
“Yeah.”
She placed the cigar back in her mouth. I felt the heat from the end hovering directly in front of my lips. She blew some smoke out holding the cigar in place with only her lips.
“You’re sure? Not even if it’s me asking?”
“No, not even if it’s you asking.” I calmly declined.
“Not even after all the free service I’m providing?”
“Haha. You really know how to use your charms to get what you want to know out of people.”
“Getting customers to open up and lending an ear to listen to their problems; that’s also part of the job after all.”
“That’s just half the reason, right? You’re actually just interested in getting your hands on some juicy gossip.”
“You’ve gotten to know me quite well. Have you been stalking me, Mr. Customer?”
“Of course not.”
She raised her hand back up and placed the cigar back between her fingers in a reverse grip. She moved her hand a bit further to the side until the back of her hand was directly in front of her lips.
When she lowered her hand, my gaze was drawn away from her eyes, pulled toward the dark red lipstick stuck to the back of her hand. The distinct outline of her lips remained on the back of her hand still very moist and wet.
Her eyes followed mine to the back of her hand and noticed it immediately, “Oh? I forgot I had lipstick on.” A victorious grin floated to her face when she said that.
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