Chapter 686: [All creatures in the world are not good in nature!]

Feriat didn’t say anything and instead, only stared at Allen, and he knew that defiant and challenging stare.

Allen smiled wryly.

She returned the empty glass at Allen and said nothing, and only waited. When she saw Allen returned his attention to his book as if losing interest on her, Feriat slightly frowned, dissatisfied. She finally spoke. She said, with a note of accusation in his beautiful voice; “You’re not the least damned interested in the reason for my absence, are you?”

Allen couldn’t help being tart, “You haven’t mentioned a word about it, love, except for talking to the others, a conversation to which I was not invited. Then, it was safe to assume it’s a lady’s thing. I’m not that crass to dip my nose into a lady’s concern without any glamor. What’s wrong? Did something disagreeable happen to you…?” Allen asked, slightly concerned.

Feriat regarded him sullenly and crossed her long slender beautiful white legs. She then folded her arms across her chest like a strict queen. The white ridges were out around her mouth again, which Allen found extremely comical. Though, she still looks like a pouting beauty—

“I don’t see how anything I saw or did could interest you,” she muttered with blaming look. "Not in the past, not now, not even in the future," A self-deprecating smile appeared on her face. She understands what her standing in this group was. In actual sense, she was not Allen's family, his woman...or even his tamed beast. Although probably she was in terms of personal status, his slave and servant, but in heart-wise, she was far from that!

She can see that in the way Allen didn't expect anything for her, no did he ask her or ordered to do anything.

Of course, she would never obey even if he did, but receiving nothing is truly, annoying borderline frustrating!

“...You might try,” Allen muttered with a faint smile, as he closed his book. “All said and done, you are still a part of our family, Feriat. Though I don’t know if you think the same but I did…your worries and concerns is also is mine to take,”

When Allen said those words, the room suddenly coagulated and turned solemn and serious. All their attention turned towards Allen and Feriat. Especially to the latter. They also waited to hear what caused Feriat to seemingly have problems.

They also wanted to help her.

“… …” Allen waited again. He did nothing to encourage her confidence as he wanted her to gain that by herself, as well as realizing that herself. He sat relaxed and handsome, with the glimmering light and heat coming from the fireplace on her beautiful snow-white hair and the glimmering ruby eyes.

Allen turned at the fireplace and suddenly throws the pieces of woods that had materialized on his hand into the fireplace. He continues watching, the pieces of dried wood gradually burning even stronger, and slowly crackled. The light was full on the warm and handsome youth’s face, but hers was in the shadow.

“I’m not a mind reader, Feriat,” he murmured. Finally couldn’t take the silence. “… and even if I had such skills, I wouldn’t use it on my friends and family without any permission. I don’t want to appear rude and impolite, violating privacies that I shouldn’t cross. And besides, I also want to hear it from you directly, to confess and reveal your own worries and concerns. Because, at that moment, I feel as if you truly saw me as a reliable confidante…or even at least a friend that you trust and depend on.”

"I truly feel like so..."

"I wanted to be one..."

Allen's handsome expression was illuminated by the flickering fire changes along with the shifting shadows—his expression giving off differing impressions accordingly.

At times like a God, and at times like a Devil.

Back and forth, and back and forth.

Whimsically, capriciously, fickly.

“I trust you, and also treasured you…I’m waiting for you to feel the same for me,” Allen turns around, the expression on his face causing Feriat to swallow her breath. Then, her face turned solemn and her gaze trembled. Taking a deep breath, she told him…

Finally, Allen learned what keeps her at bay. And his brows furrowed, a bit annoyed and helpless.

It seems like, without Allen’s permission and knowledge, Feriat turned towards the others; Layla and co. and asked for help to leave for a while, wanting to go back to her clan, and check their well-being. Feriat avoided Allen because she feared that Allen wouldn’t allow it and thus, turned towards the mistresses to ask for help. She knows that the female group would surely understand her concerns and lend her a hand. And they did.

Hearing this, Allen frowned. He looks at the others and saw them shrugging their shoulders, “No one told me about this?” he asked, somewhat hurt.

The group averted their eyes. Layla smiled wryly, “It’s not that we are purposely hiding it. You are completely busy these past few days, and we don’t want to bother you about this insignificant thing. In any case, Feriat is your tamed beast, and even if she wanted to harm you, it’s not possible anymore. And somehow, we trust her just like you did…so her wanting to go back and see her family, it’s actually an understandable desire. We just couldn’t refuse. Besides, we already warned her about important things. So, we agreed. And also, we were actually planning to tell it to you after a long while when you’re free but… we somehow forgot about it,” said with an adorable, harmless smile, Allen’s brows twitched. Okay… he wanted to get angry but couldn’t…

Who told them to be so precious...?

Allen can only sigh. “And so…? Something happened there…?”

Feriat showed a wry smile, “It’s more than something…”

Her hands were folded tightly on her knee.

“… …”

“Someone had succeeded me,” After a long silence, Feriat muttered. “The new Queen of Peri Clan… I should be happy about it since I know that I wouldn’t be able to return even if I wanted to. But… I couldn’t,”

Allen stared at her. Seeing her sorrowful expression, Allen stretched his arms and pulled her into his bosom. Allen thought she would struggle but surprisingly, Feriat let herself be pulled him and even went towards him by her own will, leaning against his chest. Stroking her silver hair, Allen said, “Then…? Do you want me to release you…? If you want…”

“It’s not that,” Feriat grasped Allen’s clothes and shook her head, cutting Allen’s words. “I’m fine with my present status now and I had not thought of going back now. Here, I have peace, I have freedom more than before. Furthermore, although I don't want to admit it, my day as a Queen has already ended, there’s no place for me there anymore.”

Allen was surprised as she actually rejected it.

This was long-awaited freedom, never thought she would cast it aside.

“Then, what’s the problem…?”

“They had joined the war…led by the new Queen. And just like before, they’re on the side of the Demons…”

“… …”

“…I tried stopping them. Of course, not asking them to join the God Clans side, not either side, but remained neutral, staying away from the war. I asked them not to enter in this troubled water. But they wouldn’t listen. They wouldn’t!” said Feriat. “Instead, they pushed me away. I have already been defeated… I know that. And there’s already a new Queen, and due to that, I was cast aside! I understand that! Even still, I don’t want the Clan to die in this war. I don’t want my fellow members to sacrifice their lives in this nonsensical war where it doesn't benefit us in any way."

"Before I was arrogant, I admit that. I think nothing of life… I only saw them as tools, as pawns that can be replaced when disappeared. But now is different. I know about it, the happiness, the love... that what it means to be truly a family... and I want for them to know it as well. But they pushed me away!” She stopped. Her tears dropping like fine pearls from a broken pearl necklace. She stared before her. “…And now…now...I don’t know what to do. They look at me as if I was a fool; as if I was a stranger. They wouldn’t even listen to a word I say.”

Beads of tears fell from her eyes as her expression turned grimace. Her whole body trembling, “What should I do…? Whichever side wins, a lot of my people would surely lose their lives. Just thinking about it…”

“Was I wrong…?” she asked, crying wildly like a child.

“I’m the one who started it. I’m the one who led them into this battlefield… was this my mistake…? Was this my fault…?”

Feriat cried mournfully. She grasped Allen’s clothes with both hands, her hand trembling… in a kind of desperation.

Allen sighs. He held her tightly, consoling her by stroking her back gently, “You’re not wrong… neither they are.”

Allen started. “All of you have your own thoughts and opinions. Although you indeed are the one responsible for lighting the fuse for them, but that doesn’t mean they would still follow it after you disappeared. They have their own lives…as much as you have yours. You all have your own ability to make decisions. But even after you appeared, didn’t they reject you…? It means that they already have made their own decisions… it’s not your fault anymore…”

“Even still—!” Feriat raised her voice.

“Feriat…no matter what race they are, mortal, god, demons, monsters… all creatures in the world are not good in nature: they are not kind, not just, nor tender…not even compassionate by nature…”

“… …” Feriat raised her head and stared at Allen with watery eyes. The tears burst forth like water from a dam, spilling down her face. She feels the muscles of her chin tremble like a small child—salty drops fall from her chin, drenching Allen’s shirt.

She then looks at Allen, as if the gaze and attention coming from him could soothe her.

Allen with the usual warm and loving smile, he wiped the tears trickling on her cheeks with his thumb. His action was so gentle as if he was caressing the most delicate thing in the world.

“As long as one has its own awareness, wisdom, intelligence and sense of self… they will always be standing in the grey area, even if you don’t like it. No one can do the decision for their selves anymore other than them. One might have guidance or reference in a particular course of actions, but in the end, they will be the one who needed to decide something for themselves. And because of that inconsistency, I say we are the utmost evil creatures in the world has ever spawned, and I doubt we’ll ever be any better. In fact, your people—just like any other race in the world—they are just frightened.”

“Frightened…?” Feriat asked, doubt. All the other girls who had crawled over, wanting to console and comfort Feriat were as well, stopped and listened to Allen’s words, their expressions having a very gentle color and their eyes emitting a loving radiance.

Seeing Allen console Feriat wholeheartedly while saying those words, they all felt a bit elated.

Although they have a hard time interposing their conversation and offer some remarks, but when they saw Allen’s cleverness and excellence, they could not help but feel happy for him as well as proud.

Allen fixed his gaze at Feriat and smiled faintly, “Hm, they are frightened. In truth, they really know what’s better for them, even without you telling them. You don't need to crack your brain out just to make them understand what you wanted, to make them believe that all of these are for their well-being. They are not that idiot and stupid unless their heads are kicked by a donkey~" he chuckled, wanting to lighten up the mood.

"But why would they reject it? Simple. In spite of the oratory and sweetness and the insistence of what’s good and bad, they didn’t want to know it. They are frightened to death of the world they know exists.”

Allen grabbed the bottle of whiskey and poured it on his glass before giving it to Feriat, “And so,” he continued as he watched her drink it. Allen stretched his hand and swiped away the wet strands of hair covering her eyes, tucking it behind her ears. “…they invent a pretty one instead and try to live on it. A world where everything for them is just within their reach.”

“… ?!!”

"They are foolish, but that is what most people do..."

“They should be pitied…I know. But it should also be remembered that as they live in fantasy, they can extend their insanity to others, too, and help to divorce them from reality.” Allen heaves a sigh.

Feriat, young and thin, and intense and sick at heart and newly embittered, considered what Allen had said for a long time. Her face became darker and darker.

Allen looks at her and pulled her once again into his bosom. Feriat, moved for a bit, adjusting her position so that the side of her head would lean against Allen’s chest. Hearing his heartbeat seemed to calm her down. Allen placed his chin on top of her head all while rubbing her arms gently, wanting her to calm down.

“I know this is hard to take, but you cannot do anything for them now. They have made their own decisions, and so there’s no point in you beating yourself over it. I might sound harsh and cold now but if I said otherwise, I would be doing you wrong, love, to say soothing, lying things to you—to ease your mind and send you away with pretty delusions and confidences. It won't do you any good at all, instead it will just trap you silly fantasies that would never happen. Well, not like I'm good at that. So please do forgive me…”

“… …”

“Saying things like; ‘Go and try persuading them, they would surely listen to you,’ or ‘don’t give up. If you won’t, there will be a time where they will surely realize it themselves,’ that would be the kind thing to do, I know but during that time, you will be the one who will be hurt and bear all kinds of pain. And I don’t want it--you hurting yourself for other people, for strangers I never knew. I don't care if you can save many by self-sacrifice, because I'd rather let many people die and be damned than see you suffer." Allen's gaze turned cold and flashing in his eyes was a murderous intent that had disappeared immediately before others could feel it.

"I don’t want you to beat yourselves over some pleasant delusions…and so I prefer the truth.” Allen planted a faint kiss on her jade-like forehead. Smiling wryly, he continued; “I also respect the fact that you are no longer the Queen of Peri I had known and met the first time, that you are now a respectable person who knows what is right or what is wrong. Not the difficult-to-understand arrogant person who acts like a stately queen who doesn’t want to listen to other opinions—I can’t tell you a lie… lies are always wrong,”

Amidst tears, Feriat stared at Allen with a very bitter smile, “You never have any mercy to other people aside from those you acknowledge, did you? Never mind, I don’t either, not much.” However, she finally feels relax and her heart slowly calms down.

“I have some…actually, but only to some extent.” Allen grinned. “In my heart, the only thing that is more important is my family…including you. I don’t care who dies or survives, as long as all of you can live a life of comfort. Even if compared to a thousand people’s lives, they would never be enough to be compared to a single one of you…”

"I know I'm not a Hero Material..."

"Is that so? But if that's the case, that would be a waste..." Feriat grinned.

"Nah, it's not a waste," Allen smiled mischievously as he pinched Feriat's nose. "I may not be a good Hero Material, but I'm probably the best Boyfriend Material~"

"Cheeky!!" To this, Feriat finally managed a laugh. Her heart and might at ease, as if she had just let go of a heavy burden. The other people present also ease their expressions and laugh, teasing Allen at his cringy lines.

While giggling in amusement, Layla sat down at the end of the couch, and stroke Feriat’s back, “Although I can’t really agree to Allen’s words just now…as it sounds completely selfish, comparing our loved ones to the world, but it’s not that I cannot understand. There’s nothing more important than family…and you are now one of us as well,”

“Sister Layla…” Feriat bit her lips.

Allen nudged Feriat’s forehead with his fingers lightly. “Although this is hard to believe but there’s nothing you can do to change their mind, Feriat. I know you want to save your clan, that’s all and good. However, that’s an already difficult thing to achieve."

"... ..."

"Judging from your own experience when you met them, although I know this is biased on my part due to my anger for what they did to you, I can see that each one of them is totally selfish and primitively human. This is not uncommon. I had seen many people like them before in my many lifetimes. Because they want a life of comfort and bliss, they wouldn’t care about the agonies of the others—war and the likes are the outcomes of such selfishness and such thing is never a rarity in this world, nor any worlds in the Thousand Worlds."

"That's..."

"Now you see how bestial can people be…? Your clan is not an exception. They were outraged by at the agonized rebuffs they received from other people, other races they didn’t see their own." Allen shook his head, his expression full of complex emotions. "... Most people, you see, are involved with no one but themselves. It’s kind of wickedness, but it is understandably humane…”

“So there it is… it is normal. Then, why are you beating yourself over it…?”

Allen rubbed Feriat cheeks with his thumb in an affectionate manner.

"You had already done your best for them. If they fell into ruin, it's not your fault anymore, it's their's. You can only say one thing, 'You reap what you sow!'" Allen grinned. "They are not children that you still need to baby them. They have their own lives, as well as you have yours...savvy?"