Chapter 6: Misunderstandings

At a certain inn, a man could be heard screaming at the early stages of Dawn. The lights around the inn began to turn on and people could wonder what was going on. On the third floor there lies a man shocked at his current predicament on the floor and a woman that stood naked above the despondent man.

A woman around the age of 17 was standing there. She probably has the best figure in that village. Her facial features were full of life as she smiled at the cowering man. On top of her head were two obvious ears but they weren’t normal ears….cat ears!? The ears were perky as they moved forward and back as if they were curious to hear the words from that man. Her body figure was an hourglass figure, with a nice bare chest with two voluptuous mounds that any man would fight for. Below the chest laid bare a golden entrance to eternal happiness. The hips of this woman were perfect for giving birth. Her legs were at an appropriate length and silky smooth skin. Behind her was a tail, a tail that was frolicking vigorously as she stared at the despondent man who seemed to stare at her.

The woman did not even notice but she was bare naked and the man continued to stare. She looked at her nakedness and began to blush while covering her important parts….

“Ecchi~...I don’t mind if it’s you though, goshujin-sama~~”

“OY OY!! WHO ARE YOU”

“Nh~ Goshujin-sama, don’t play jokes! You. Know. Me~” The woman began to creep towards Souma who could only scurry further back.

“Ah ah!!”

‘Well, I don’t mind the view...WAIT WHAT AM I SAYING!? GOSHUJIN-SAMA? I AM NOT HER MASTER WAIT WHAT!?’

“Oy Kora! How am I your master!?” I spoke with hesitance wondering who this person was…

“Un..Nh! Goshujin-sama! How could you forget! Even after r-i-d-i-n-g~ me, you already forgotten your slave~”

"WHAT!? SLAVE!? RIDING WHO!?"

“OY OY I DID NO SUCH THING WHEN!? AND STILL WHO ARE YOU!?”

The woman looked her master with discontempt. How could he forget her after all the times they spent together.

She looked at him and began to cry. Her cheerful cat ears began to droop and her tail was no longer swaying in the air but just hanging with no vigor. She plopped to the floor and cried at the fact Souma had forgotten her.

“*sniffle* even...e-even af-fter those k-kisses you don’t remember me!?...H-how could you master! Waaaah!!!”

“Ah ah! I’m sorry! But I do not remember having a one night stand with you! I JUST ARRIVED TO THIS WORLD!?”

'Did I really have a one night stand with this girl...score!'

“Waaaaah!! Master forgot! BAKA!!!”

“AHH AH! I’M SORRY!! GOMENASAI!!"

The woman began to run out of the room and left Souma that looked confused even more than when he arrived in this world..

“WHAT DID I DO WHEN I WAS SLEEPING!?...WHO IS SHE!?”

Souma did a verbal tsukkomi and voices could be heard downstairs.

“HEY! YOUNG MAN! GET DOWN HERE!! HOW COULD YOU DO THIS!!”

After Aerylith called Souma, he began to fidget…

‘Oh god...From what I heard from Shishou’s stories….Women are very delicate creatures but when they are mad they will kill you….’

‘Oh man….KAMI-SAMA SAVE MEEEE!!!!’

I drooped my shoulders and got dressed. I finally began to descend to my death…

Cries could be heard from the ‘now dressed’ woman and Aerylith was trying to calm her down.

‘Good thing it was only Aerylith, I do not know what might happen if Amelia-chan was there...’

“YOU. Young man! Sit here! How could you do this to a poor girl and not remember her! You should be ashamed!? Not even Leo could stoop this low!”

I quickly sat on the chair that was singled out from the rest. I sat in the middle of the first floor while the ‘nekomimi’ continued to sob and Aerylith could only glare at me with scowl on her face.

“Ah. AH! I do not know what happened! I am sorry!! Forgive me!!” I continued to apologize repeatedly but none of them reached the crying girl and disapproving Aerylith. All I could do was prostrate myself and receive punishment so I did.

I went onto the floor and did a dogeza position to accept their punishment. If I was going to die, might as well redeem some kind of honor I have left…

‘I don’t even know what I did!? I was sleeping and dreamt about suns...wait..why did those suns feel so good…? Like puffy clouds..they were round and bouncy...they had a perfect shape and felt like a water balloon in my hands...NO WAIT FOCUS ON THE SITUATION NOW!?’

“I sincerely apologize. I will accept any punishment you bestow on me. I must at least die with honor!”

Souma spoke with resolve. His voice resounded the room and the woman stopped crying and lunged towards Souma.

“NOO!! NO! GOSHUJIN-SAMA! DON’T DIE!! WHY ARE YOU GONNA DIE!! PLEASE NOOO!!”

“I am sorry but this is what I must do to atone for the sins I’ve committed. Aerylith, please I must commit Harakiri to regain my honor as a suitable punishment for tainting this woman that I have seemed to have forgotten. It is my deepest mistake in my life and I’ll make sure it won’t happen ever in this life.”

“WAAAAH!!” The woman began to cry but another voice could be heard crying along with her. It was Amelia.

“Sweetie, Go to your room. This is something Souma and Akane have to talk about.”

Before Amelia could even talk, Souma interrupted with a roar.

“WAIT WHAT!? AKANE!! WAIT WHAT!!”

Souma began to look at the girl that was presumed to be Akane and began to swing his head back and forth.

“WHAAAAT!? AKANE WEREN’T YOU A SABRETOOTH TIGER! WHAT IS THIS BODY, THAT FIGURE….those ears….that tail…….that..chest…!?”

“W-well goshujin-sama, when I saw the girls of this place chase you...I..I-i was jealous...All I wanted was to be with you..I even kissed you...and you forgot about me *sniffle* I had no choice! THEY WERE GOING TO STEAL YOU!”

Souma looked utterly stupid at this point. How the hell did his pet sabretooth do this…

‘Haaaa...she was jealous...Oh man...I have to deal with this...it’s not like I’m mad but how…??’

“Wait….you were jealous? Did you even see them catch me??”

“No b-but you carried them HIME STYLE!! I WANT THAT TOO”

Akane began to pout at Souma.

“Ah ah!! Well well….uhh..” Souma began to look at Aerylith and the watery-eyed Amelia.

‘What...is...going..on...’

Souma began to stand up then picked up Akane in a princess carry and led her towards the chair to sit her down.

“There I did the same to you as I did those women, please do not cry...I do not like when girls cry…”

Souma looked at Akane and he began to recall memories of Harumi when she talked about her previous relationship that was too dark for her to even talk about.

“*sniffle* I-its okay, goshujin-sama!”

“No, do not call me that, It makes me feel like one of those ‘masters’. Please call me Souma” Souma replied in retort.

“Okay! souma-chii!! daisuki!!”

The situation turned from a dark blue atmosphere to a pink and peachy situation.

“DAME!!! NO NO NO!!” Shouted the teary-eyed Amelia.

“Huh? Wait wh-”

Before Souma could even finish his sentence, he was tackled by Amelia and fell onto the floor.

“Onii-chan….”

“ONII-CHAN!? WAIT WHAT!? NO NO NO!!!”

“HEY! Souma-chii is mine!! I love him!! HE IS MY MASTER GET OUT YOU HOME WRECKER!!”

“Onii-chan please tell this ‘fat’ woman to get out. You know...you were the first..I ever saw...it was my first time…”

“GO-SHU-JIN-SAMA!!! WHAT DOES SHE MEAN BY HER ‘FIRST TIME’!?”

“Uh...ah!! AMELIA-CHAN WHAT DO YOU MEAN BY THAT!?”

“Ohh~ Onii-chan, don’t tell me you already forgot what happened that day~”

“WHAAAAAAT WHAT DO YOU MEAN BY THAAAAT!?”

Souma began to sweat bullets as Leo appeared behind Aerylith who was star struck at this point of the conversation.

“OY SOUMA! YOU!!” Leo got up and began to drag Souma out the door.

“GOSHUJIN-SAMA!!”

“No akane! He is not worthy for you!!” Bellowed Leo towards Akane.

“WAIT OTOU-SAN!!! DON’T!!”

“AMELIA! DON’T TELL ME YOU FORGIVE THIS TRASH!”

“Ah AH!! I DID NOTHING BELIEVEEEE MEEE!!!” Souma spoke in succession after Leo.

“FIRST YOU SOILED MY DAUGHTER’S EYES AND NOW THIS!? YOU EVEN HAD THE BALLS TO FIND ANOTHER WOMAN WHEN YOU APPARENTLY HAD MY DAUGHTER AS A SNACK!?”

Leo continued to drag the poor soul and kicked him out the front door.

“NOOOOoooooooo!! I DID NOTHI-” Souma didn’t even get to finish his sentence as he was face planted onto the ground.

“YOU ARE LEAVING TONIGHT!! I usually am kind to people but I hate scum like you!”

‘WHAT DID I DO TO DESERVE THIS!?’

After Leo closed the door, screams and noises could be heard inside. Before Leo was gravely mistaken and began to understand the situation, Souma had already left the front yard.

The village was all happy and cheery like every other day. People communicated with each other and worked together. Everything was fine and dandy until a 15 year old boy could be spotted. His body reeked a negative aura that contradicted the village’s entirety. The village folks could only ignore him as they did not want to involve themselves with a boy that looked like he would suck the life out of you.

‘Haaaa...I don’t want to do anything...I just feel stupid..What did I even do anyways...’

“oh my buddha...what did I do wrong” Souma spoke as if life had left his body…

‘I do not know what I should do anymore...First I get in trouble with Akane...then Aerylith...then Amelia...and finally thrown out of the place I almost called home by Leo...’

“Haaaa..” I could only sigh as I walked the village streets…

“I’ll just go do my training...then I will leave...I don’t need to return back there...I have my stuff already…”

Souma dragged his feet towards the ‘broken’ northern gate. Even as he walked through the village, the females stared at him but they could not talk to the man as his expression was pale and full of dread. Souma ignored any confrontation as his mood wasn’t up to it. His eyes showed a dark hue of blue as he dragged forward with no goal in his path. Even the Guard who tried to ask Souma if he could teach him that technique, could not ask as the man was desolate with no emotions. Souma just continued onward dragging his feet outside the village perimeters.

After walking a few miles, Souma stopped and began his training. At first he was slow because he wasn’t in the mood after the whole situation that occurred but he gradually began to speed up. Souma tried to focus only on the training, he did not know why that happened but he mustn’t dwell on it. If he had done something wrong he must apologize and leave.

‘After I am done, I will apologize, No I cannot return..I’ll go ask around for paper to leave a notice that I won’t be returning anymore...’

Souma began his rigorous training a few miles outside the gate. Females looked at the handsome man but they could not interrupt him. He was doing strange movements where he propped himself upside down and began to do one finger push ups and rotated each hands.

After Souma finished the push ups, he began to practice his martial arts. He stretched his body and began to move in unpredictable movements. He swung his body left and right as he practiced the initial forms of Muay Thai. Then Souma rotated to Sambo and then continued to Shaolin Fist style and so on. The females could only look at the man that practiced those weird forms. His body began to move faster and the females could not follow his movements. Several females even tried to move closer but they could not. Unimaginable pressure penetrated the air and created a wall that blocked the females a few meters away from Souma.

Souma dismissed the several windows that popped up and continued his training regiment for 6 hours. All of the females returned back to the village as Souma could not be approached.

“Paaahh haaaa! I am so stupid!? CHIKUSHOU!! WHAT DID I DO!?.....” Souma screamed at the sky. This was the first blunder he had come across. He could not remember what he did to those two.

Back at the Inn, the entire family including Akane and Tamago-chan were in shock. After Leo had gone around looking for Souma, he could not find him and even went out the gates to see if he could at least spot Souma. Leo returned with a grim expression.

“Oh….no!! I’m so stupid!! WHY DID I DO THIS!?”

Leo got on his knees and began to pound against the hard floor of the inn.

Akane and Amelia were both sobbing together while Aerylith tried to calm the two. Tamago just shook crazy and rolled about on the floor. Everyone was in confusion, they were so stupid that they could not even listen to him, especially after Akane and Amelia told Leo about what was really going on. Akane talked about how she was the Sabretooth and she transformed into her current state after being jealous that the women of the village that were going after Souma. After Akane explained her issue, Leo was immediately slapped by Akane and then followed after her was Amelia who slapped her father in succession. Amelia then began to explain that her father was stupid and didn’t even listen to Souma. Of course Amelia explained that he misunderstood the thing about ‘her first time’. She meant that Souma was the first boy she ever saw naked and after explaining things, she turned beet red after explaining that she kept thinking about Souma. Aerylith snapped out of her confusion early on since she probably understood what those two meant. Aerylith began to kick Leo out of the house and he could not return until he brought Souma back. However Leo had no clue on where to start….

6 hours later of searching through every nook and cranny of the entire village, Leo laid on the ground and began to stare at the afternoon sky.

“Souma...my friend...Where’d you go...I am sorry...You were a son to me...I could not forgive those who treated women bad but I have no right to speak about treatment when you clearly did nothing wrong…” Leo spoke in a whisper towards the sky and got up to continue his search. As he got up he noticed a discolored object rendering in the sky a few miles in the distance.

Outside the village approximately 5 miles away, a boy could be seen there on the floor covered in sweat.

“Ha...ha...ha...I am tired..I have nowhere to return to now…” I stared at the endless sky and hoped for a miracle to happen.

“Haaaa, it’s been nearly a week since I arrived to this world and already this happens...Kami-sama why am I here anyways…”

“What did I do to deserve this….”

Souma looked towards the sky and it began to change. The sky was changing not everywhere but only above Souma. The misconfiguration of the sky seemed to grow larger and approached Souma at an alarming rate.

“OH WHAT NOW!? WHAT DID I DO!?”

Souma just stared back at the discolored object that was increasing in speed.

‘I might as well die, can’t do nothing here really!? what did I even do anyways...’

The object in the sky began to fall upon Souma and a bright light consumed the area which Souma was in.

‘Ngggh what’s going on...’

I finally opened my eyes and I saw that I was in a familiar void. Indeed it was the same void I had practiced in for several months, how could I forget the whiteness that extended infinitely. Haha..Hahaaa...What’s going on….?

Souma stood up only in order to get knocked back down. A godly pressure was upon him and he could not do anything about. Souma could only try but it was futile.

In front of Souma there stood a spirit, of course Souma had never seen this spirit but how come it seemed so familiar…

‘What is that….it feels..like...me…..’

I am you.

‘Wait what? did that thing just answer...but I didn’t talk...’

I can read your thoughts because I am you.

‘Okaaayy...well how many fingers am I holding behind my back!?’

3 because I kno- WAIT!? enough of the stupid jokes….

‘Oh shoot I shouldn’t piss off myself...I look pretty strong..I don't wanna die in a suicide...Is it suicide..?’

Souma, you must return to the village and decide your path….

‘Path? What path? Wait what?’

The elder knows everything.

‘Are you the elder?’

What? No. I am not old!?

‘Haaaa….If you are me, then I am you, you look older than me, then I become you so are you an older me?’

Yes, I am olde- WAIT I KNOW YOUR TRICK!? YOU JUST WANT ME TO SAY I AM OLD

‘Damn, myself is too smart for myself. I can’t outsmart myself when myself is too smart for myself….’

Damn righ- WAIT YOU MUST RETURN TO THE VILLAGE!

‘WHY SHOULD I!? They threw me out!!’

JUST GO BACK THERE!!

‘NO!’

YES!

‘NO!’

Akane and Amelia are crying.

‘Well, I still won’t go!’

Akane will give. you. something. “special”...

‘Hmm……….what is that something...Wait NO!’

Hurry up and go back stupid self. Man, this is awkward calling myself stupid…

‘You should be stupid, why would I return to a place that kicked me out...’

Well, let’s just say Leo is stupid then.

‘Okay, I am gonna go.’

Wait what!? Just because Leo is stupid you’ll go?

‘Yeah he’s pretty stupid, probably misunderstood.’

Yeah, very stupid.

‘Haha! I like myself!’

I like myself too!

The two Soumas began to laugh and then the atmosphere turned opposite. They began to snicker while crossing their fingers in their own hands.

‘Hehehe...Leo will get his payback….’

I can’t wait to see this mufufufufu……

‘Oh just you wait, you’ll get a front row seat’

Haha, of course I am you after all

In unison they began to snicker in that void and back to the village Leo could feel a cold wind sneak up behind him.

“It’s the afternoon...Why is it cold…?”

Leo spoke to himself and only could wonder.

The two Soumas immediately hit it off but then Souma began to ask.

‘How did you even get here, Me?’

Oh you remember that weird object in the sky?

‘Yeah...it was weird….’

Well, think of it as my transport vehicle

‘Transport vehicle?? Where did you come from?’

Remember your original body back on Earth?

‘Ah AH! I do! So I can return home??’

Hey hey calm down. You will return home. Just not now

‘WHAT DO YOU MEAN NOT NOW!?’

Well, wouldn’t you miss your two girlfriends?

‘WAIT WHAT!? I could understand Akane but Amelia no no no, Leo would hate me.’

Well, that’s more of a reason to piss him off isn’t it?

‘Well, I don’t like using women.’

Ahh seeing as you are me, we both have the same values but I didn’t mean it entirely that way.

‘What do you mean?’

Uhhh, I know I am dense but how are you so dense that you cannot notice what she does?

‘Wait what?’

OKAAAAY! School is in session.

Lesson one: What do you call a girl who blushes at you?

‘Umm, she’s sick?’

Dumbass….dammit why am I stupid...I AM SO SMART THAT I AM STUPID…

‘Wait what?? I don’t get this….?’

OKAAAAAAY.

Lesson two: If a girl looks at you naked but never gets mad at you what do you call that?

‘She’s a pervert?’

You are seriously making me feel stupid...well I am you...damn..you dense mothe- Okay ignore that….

‘Okaaay…? this is weird?’

FINAL LESSON: WHAT DO YOU CALL A GIRL THAT ISN’T EVEN YOUR SISTER BUT SHE CALLS YOU ONII-CHAN?? IF YOU DON’T GET THIS I AM GOING TO FORCE MEMORIES INTO YOUR HEAD AND TURN YOU INTO A SIS CON

‘WAIT WHAT!? DUDE ME DON’T DO THAT WTF!? I DON’T HAVE A SISTER COMPLEX WHAT THE HELL MAN!? AHHH THE ANSWER IS THAT……….’

Several minutes later….

I’m waiting…...waiting…..HURRY UP YOU SLOW PIECE OF DUNG

‘Ah ah!!! Okay okay...ummm... let’s go with this? Maybe she’s in heat?’

Oh dear kami-sama, wait kami-sama? I’m a god so let me change that.

Oh dear magnificent me, What is myself doing...Why is he so stupid..Oh well I guess “in heat” implies she wants him and that leads to love…But wait will he even notice?

‘LOVE!? WAIT WHAT!! HOW IS THAT POSSIBLE??!?!?!?’

Ah ah! My dear stupid self, you’ll get it once you return.

‘NO WAIT EXPLAIN NOW’

Nope.

‘WAIT STOP EXPL-’

Astral Mind forcefully canceled.

I returned to the world I arrived in and could only express my anger towards the ground.

“WHAT THE HELL MAN LOVE!? I DO NOT UNDERSTAND!?”

A parchment rolled out of Souma’s pocket and had a few words that caused Souma to go ape shit.

This is Kami-sama speaking, Souma, you are stupid so you probably won’t understand love but it means you have to become one with Amelia and Akane. Also, don’t forget my front row seat for Leo’s punishment.

“DAMN MYSELF!? SHISHOU SAID WOMEN ARE HARD TO DEAL WITH AND I HAVE 2 NOW!?! AHHHH!!! I DON’T WANT TO DIE!!!”

Souma screamed at the sky which his Alter-ego came from. Souma spat out a few curse words in Japanese but no one heard him. Souma stood up dejectedly and began to walk towards the village. He wasn’t in the mood as he passed the Guard only to ignore his approach.

‘I’m gonna teach Leo a lesson..but I do not know how to handle love…? I hope I could just swing it...Wait..I could use Father’s manga as a reference…? I mean there was that manga about a boy I believe the manga was called ____ where he was in love with a crap ton of females, but nevermind that I’ll have to approach this carefully...or my life will be in danger...Shishou said women are wrathful beings and they will haunt the rest of your life if you upset them….I don’t want that...’

Souma approached the inn only to begin his descent to hell where he will die….of “exhaustion”.

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