Chapter 6:

“... Fuuuckkkk…”

Jay was bored.

Perhaps not the worst problem to have in the dangerous world of Divinity’s Rest. Still, boredom is an insidious killer.

Jay gripped the pommel of his sword affectionately, “You’re cool Swordy, God, you’re cool, but I wish you had some kind of gimmick.”

Watching Swordy cut through wood like a knife through butter was soothing to Jay’s soul.

But after a few hours, it just became training.

+++

Swordsmanship

General skill

Level 2 (00.14)

+++

And Jay has had enough of that lately to spew sick. It’s not as if a better sword means better training after all. That’s why training swords exist.

However, not all of Jay’s boredom came from sheer lack of anything to do. “...Am I just going to sit here for the next month and a half, hoarding my rewards like a fucking dragon?!”

It was lack of drive that made up a large portion of Jay’s crisis. If Jay could see the future, figuratively this time, he would be able to work for his goals with a smile.

But Jay could live with a lack of a drive, and live his life looking for new ways to be entertained, if not for his other, bigger, problem. “Hahh, even if I did, who’d be there to see it?”

Indeed, in addition to, and even causing Jay's lack of drive was the crippling loneliness.

Why try at all if there is no one to see it? No one to judge you, congratulate you, or be impressed by you?

In a less vain manner of asking, why try if there is no one you to care about, no one to protect, when there are even no vows and morals to uphold?

Try all you like, without people, you’ll just be a king of dirt. Humans are social like that.

Jay cried to the sky, “System! Show available quests!”

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Claim Ruso Lake City!

Rank: Rare

…

A Noble is nothing without their supporters. Get relatively powerful people to back you.

+++

But the answer to his questions did not magically appear.

“...”

Jay looked to the sky, “It’s only a couple of fucking hours until dusk… Maybe I’ll have a clearer head in the morning.”

Jay shook his head and picked himself up. “God, I fucking better feel better tommorrow, it’s not in my nature to be this much of a bitch,”

…

Baron Northsand could be seen with his noble steed in the wee hours of the morning.

Jay stroked Betsy’s mane, “The problem is Betsy, I didn’t realize I had a problem.”

Jay fed Betsy another handful of grain, “And even nobles such as myself can’t fix problems we are unaware of.”

Jay grinned to himself, “If having no one around drains my morale, I’ll bring people around.”

Jay leaned back as he watched Betsy eat, “If having no one around robs me of my quests, I’ll bring people around.”

Jay laughed just a tad bit maniacally, “If having no subjects renders my innate superiority moot, I’ll bring people around.”

Jay eyed his pit, “And if bringing people straight to the seat of my power causes a whole host of problems…”

Flame flowed out of Jay’s right hand as he manifested his ticking stopwatch. “I’ll be sure to figure something out.”

Jay stared at his prized possession, “As a rising noble star, my first action will be-”

“...”

Jay shifted his gaze onto the hand holding his prized possession, “...To take a bath, goddamn.”

Jay slapped Betsy’s behind, “Perk up, you lazy ass, we’ve got a trip ahead of us.”

“Minimap.”

The closest probable watering hole was chosen, and the entire administrative force of the Northsand Baronay went to scrub itself off in what’s basically an overgrown water puddle.

…

A mud golem stared at Jay. “Pft-hahahah, is that what I really look like!? I look like a cursed golem with blood leaking out of where the eyes should be!”

After that, Jay filled several buckets with water, and started lathering up some soap unworthy of a noble.

Jay spent much more time than he expected at the watering hole. Between scrubbing himself until he almost bled and detangling his hair, and even giving Betsy a scrubdown, the next ‘loop’ happened while Jay was bathing. Naked.

Normally, that wouldn’t be a problem. Would you be self-conscious over you seeing your own dick?

Which is why Jay let thought he was prepared for whatever would come out of that portal. It would be an awkward situation at most.

Let it be known, Jay Northsand is horrible at predicting himself.

A tall 10/10 woman strolled out of the flaming portal.

Jay was, due to a lack of a better word, flabbergasted. He didn’t even cover his crotch.

She looked between Jay’s legs. “Oof, no wonder I had confidence problems”

Jay recognized that feminine voice. It was his voice.

Jay almost fainted.

They stared at each other for what felt like an eternity, but was likely only half a minute.

A bemused expression on Jaylee’s face.

A horrid expression on Jay’s face.

Eventually, Jaylee started dissolving into blue fire, and a large crack sound could be heard throughout the watering hole.

Two halves of a paper charm floated down, and Jaylee turned into Alt-Jay.

“PWUAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA-”

“Hic, Hic-”

“Hic, snort, AHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!”

Alt-Jay howled with laughter until he dissolved.

Jay however, didn’t move until well after that. He didn’t even notice that he was crying blood, but if you had asked, he would have deemed it appropriate.

Jay broke out of his daze, “...Jesus. Everloving. Christ…”

Jay looked at the sky, “Don’t take this the wrong way, but I’m gonna kill myself one of these days.”

Jay sighed and went to collect his stuff before he finished his bath.