《War of Seasons》33. How to Stand Tall
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The café Ariana and Dorothea ended up in was one that aimed for a relaxed, tidy feel. A vase holding a single shasta daisy sat atop a yellow doily on each polished table. A bar sat against the far wall and had hand-woven placemats in front of each tall, cushioned stool. With a different person by her side, Ariana might have appreciated the fresh, intimate setting. Instead, her riling anger was mixed with perverse pleasure when she saw Dorothea rubbing at the wrist that was only released once they were on their way to their seats.
Ariana didn’t have a plan beyond giving Dorothea what-for before going on her way, but when the moment came right after drinks were brought and orders for lunch were placed, she hesitated. Would this really accomplish anything? Like usual, she couldn’t really expect anything beyond getting looked down upon. Still, she started speaking, initiating conversation since Dorothea wasn’t quite dumb enough to try for a pleasant chat on her own.
“Do you think you’ll be regarded as a hero?” she asked, tone level.
Dorothea was inscrutable. “Everyone can and will think what they like.”
Well. If that wasn’t a noncommittal, chickenshit kind of answer, Ariana didn’t know what was. It pissed her right off. “Let me be clear about one thing since Iree’s forcing me to be around you. You’re a pathetic excuse for a human being. You’re weak, self-righteous, and plainly a horrible person. You’re an idiot,” she laughed contemptuously, “if you think it’s fair for you to waltz in now and expect us to be grateful. I’ve killed and shed blood for this. I’ve risked everything I have and you’re here just now, after all this time, getting off your ass because you suddenly decided it was the nice thing to do? Yeah,” she scoffed. “Sure. Once it affects you personally I’m sure it doesn’t feel too good.”
Dorothea was trembling by the end of the indictment on her character, and it pleased Ariana to see her so affected. That kind of reaction wouldn’t have occurred if Dorothea didn’t think she was at least a little bit right.
When Dorothea responded, the tremor was present in her voice as well. “I’m not going to take back my inaction,” she said, “but I’m going to do all that I can in the here and now.” Her brows furrowed with confusion. “Please tell me something honestly. Why is it my responsibility to fight in a war that my people didn’t start?”
“Because your power could have saved so many lives, dammit!” Ariana snapped. A waiter that had been passing by their table jumped at the venom in her tone, silverware piled atop used plates and wastefully half-eaten meals rattling.
“I see. You have a fair point.” Dorothea smiled faintly, and Ariana wanted to slap it off her face. “At this point, we’ll simply have to agree to disagree and continue as we are. I’m going to lend my assistance in the way I see fit. That’s my choice. You can act and think as you like.”
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Ariana would do just that without anyone’s permission. From there, they were silent until their meal was delivered and silent throughout it. It was precisely due to this quietness that a conversation from the bar reached them. There were two participants that Ariana judged to be a man and a woman since her back was facing that direction.
“Did you hear about it? The Atlin line wasn’t gone after all. There’s one here, in the fort!”
“Of course I heard about it. I live with my head outside of my ass and read the paper every day, just like everyone else.”
Dorothea’s eyes went wide, and Ariana sighed. Each and every major event in Sacer was recorded and shared with the fort in the daily paper. Rhys, being a better public spokesperson than Iree, handled most contact. Ariana thought the whole thing was a waste of time, but it did make the people feel better to know what was happening behind the scenes.
“I know! But isn’t it a bad idea who they picked to guard her? I mean, that Ghurian woman… How do we know she won’t just kill her when she gets the chance? Wouldn’t this be the perfect chance to turn traitor? Again, I mean.”
“Shit, you’re right… You know, Commander Nobelis has a good head on her shoulders, but maybe she’s a bit too easy going when it comes to this kind of thing. Once a traitor, always a traitor. Don’t we all know that?”
The conversation was too pointed. There was no way they didn’t know that Ariana was sitting right there.
“It’s like the army doesn’t even care about our concerns. With this much on the line, isn’t it better to just play it safe and get rid of her?”
Dorothea leaned forward as she anxiously stirred her drink with her straw. “Ariana, they’re talking about…”
No, really? Ariana shot her a glare before returning her attention to listening.
“At least she’s good for one thing though, right? Remember those posters from a few years back? I’ve got a few buddies that pull those out on lonely nights. A kind of throwback, if you will.”
Right. That. When Ariana had first been invited into Iree’s elite squad, part of the public outcry had manifested through meticulously hand-drawn posters of Ariana in a very compromising, lewd position. Of course, Ariana had continued on business as usual, but the rest of Springen had had a field day. Iree included, as she’d run around the entire fort in a thunderous rage burning each poster she found. The council had reprimanded her harshly for scaring several citizens halfway to death, but Ariana was grateful. She just hadn’t found the right words to thank her because acknowledging the situation would dredge up the humiliation of it.
“Damn, that’s disgusting!”
“Yeah, I’m not proud of myself. Definition of guilty pleasure.”
Too late, Ariana noticed how indignant and furious Dorothea looked. Before Ariana could stop her, the girl had stood and was shouting. “Be quiet! Act like the adults you are and have some decorum!”
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Shit. The worst thing Ariana could possibly do in this sort of situation was draw attention to herself and let them know they were getting to her. Of course someone like Dorothea didn’t understand that. “Sit down!” she hissed.
But Dorothea had already approached the gossipping couple, who had turned to her with matching sneers. So they probably didn’t know who she was. The rest of the café’s patrons watched with bated breath, all too gleeful to let things transpire as they would.
Laying low wouldn’t work anymore; an attempt at damage control was the only choice now. Ariana jumped up and seized Dorothea’s wrist, yanking her back hard enough to make her cry out. Where was their waitress? They needed to pay their check and leave as soon as possible.
Too late—the pair had already honed in. “Oh, it’s the spank bait herself! Did we offend you?”
Of course she was offended, but she knew better than to respond in kind. They were all the same, these non-combatants. All too ready to do as they pleased and look down on others without bothering to give a moment’s thought to the consequences. Damn that waitress. Hurry up! Ariana saw her, tried to catch her eye, but the girl fled to different tables to avoid confrontation.
Dorothea kept pushing. “Ariana is out there fighting for all of you, and you have nothing but hatred to give back to her…” Her voice was bitter, and it shook. “For you to say such things, and for everyone else to just let it happen… It’s, it’s inexcusable!”
Ariana tightened her grip on Dorothea’s wrist. Pot. Kettle.
The couple seemed cowed for a moment, if only shocked that someone had challenged them. Even so, such meager words wouldn’t sway anyone’s opinion. “That doesn’t change the fact that our army is being corrupted by a Ghurian rat! We could lose everything if she turns on us!”
Ah. So that was it. Anger was not a base emotion, Ariana knew. It was always founded by something like fear, jealousy, love, or the like. These people were afraid. They were scared, not without reason, that the Sacerians would be defeated, that they would lose everything and never be able to meet again in a bar like this, talking shit and enjoying one another’s company. They were afraid of the powerlessness of a situation that was out of their control. Well, tough. They should have become soldiers if they were going to cry about not liking it.
Dorothea took a breath and stood straighter. “On my honor as the last surviving member of the Atlin family, I swear to you that I will do everything in my power to make sure that the decisive moments of this war are upon us. So, please, hold on just a little while longer.”
Murmurs spread, swirling around them. An Atlin! So the rumors were true. The newspaper had mentioned the return of Juncture magic to Sacer, but here it was in the flesh.
The aggressors, now lost for words, leapt to stalk towards the exit after throwing money on the bartop. Dorothea didn’t have the stupidity to look pleased when she turned back to Ariana, but she did look a little surprised to find a baleful stare. “I’m sorry,” she said, face falling. “I wasn’t thinking.”
Ariana didn’t reply, as she was now busy watching a well-dressed woman march towards them. A manager or even the proprietor, maybe, and Ariana knew exactly what she was going to say.
The businesswoman looked at Dorothea apologetically. “I apologize for the disturbance. I’m sorry, but your…companion will have to leave after paying her part of the bill. You’re welcome to stay. Once again, we apologize for the trouble. Please accept a coupon for a free dessert as a token of our apology.”
So it went. Ariana turned to leave.
“I’d prefer it if she could stay,” Dorothea said loudly.
Idiot. What was Dorothea thinking? Did she think sticking up for Ariana would make her look like a good person? The damage in that respect was already done. Besides, it wouldn’t change anything about Ariana’s position to confront something so small, so what was the point? Dorothea was just embarrassing them both.
The manager hesitated, eyes darting between the two women she faced.
Exhausted and more fed up with Dorothea than she had been at the start, Ariana cleared her throat. “I’ll go.” Submitting was safer than fighting back. This way, she didn’t give them any more ammunition to use against her. There were more important battles to pick than the one here and now, and this picking and choosing was a big part of moving through life with some semblance of sanity intact. She turned to Dorothea, who looked confused and sad. “Do you have money on you?” Ariana asked curtly.
Dorothea’s eyes got bigger. “Um… No, I don’t. I’m sorry. I left it all with Shark.”
With that, the opportunity to deliver a minor, spiteful blow presented itself. Naturally, a former resident of Sirpo wouldn’t have too much Sacerian currency floating around. When Ariana smirked, Dorothea’s eyes flashed with panicked realization. “My oh my!” Ariana feigned surprise. “Surely you didn’t think I would pay for your meal?”
Calming down more quickly than expected, Dorothea laughed. “I probably should have seen that coming. Okay then… I suppose I’ll see you later, Ariana. Take care.” She turned back to the manager with an embarrassed smile. “Well, this is awkward.”
Ariana made a quick exit before her better judgement could assert itself. Iree was going to chew her out something fierce for abandoning her charge like this, even in such a relatively harmless manner. No, more like Shark would get to her first. Still, this was something she could do to express her dissatisfaction. They would all look down on her, eh? Well at least, unlike the supposed savior of Sacer, she could pay a damn tab.
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