Maya glanced at Hara, considering whether she might be someone worth giving the Diviner’s Orb to.

But no. A Domitian trickster with an unknown soulbinding was probably the worst possible person to choose. Except maybe Zarene; someone legitimately insane would probably be more than useless.

No, it had to be a non-trickster at minimum. Someone inclined to trust Maya would be helpful, so they wouldn’t just store it away and forget about it.

Sevard? But he was still a trickster, even if he seemed generally more trustworthy than most.

Did she know anyone else outside the two main factions? Apart from Zarene, who as far as she could tell knew and cared nothing for anyone but herself, and Sevard, who as a mercenary rogue worked for anyone, everyone she could think of belonged to either Shardlord or Domitius.

Well, given the choice, it seemed only fair to give the Oracle to the mages. Domitius already had something of a monopoly on tricksters.

If the two deities were in conflict as it seemed, well, the factions already attacked each others’ buildings, so it wouldn’t be putting anyone in Domitius’s crosshairs that wasn’t already there. Certainly someone in the mage academy would have a better chance of survival than a solo player that Domitius could kidnap and drag off.

Surely things would have settled down by now. The academy and Domitius’s castle would have reverted, now that the unlock was successful. Shardlord hadn’t been able to prevent it, Domitius had won this engagement, and his minions were everywhere to greet the newbies. But that would mean they had no need to keep hold of the mage academy, right? They’d all be out doing other things, not fixating on it.

At least Maya hoped so.

But first things first. She had to ditch Hara, and not in a way that made her go running straight to Domitius and Cydrin. As far as she knew, the Trickster didn’t know about the Diviner’s Orb’s existence in this version of reality, and she fully intended to keep it that way.

They neared the end of the tunnel, the leypillar waiting there with its familiar black gleam. Evening light shone across the arrival cave, dim as the shadows stretched toward Nirsym. Maya could see all the city’s lights gleaming golden against the darkening sky, and beyond the dark sea rippled. It really was a beautiful city.

“Why are we back here?” Hara’s voice had fully lost its dazed quality and was back to its usual mix of frustrated and impatient. Perhaps even a bit more so than before. “I thought you were going to prove your point?”

She could still do it, turn around, take her to the prison—

NO, stupid luck, she was not going to do any such idiotic thing!

“I decided that it’s more important that neither of us ends up any more messed up or constrained than we already are, than to simply prove a point.” Maya immediately regretted her tone. She’d been trying for confident, but it had somehow come out defiant if not downright arrogant. Way to make friends …

Could she blame it on her luck? She really wasn’t sure anymore how much of anything was the fault of the game’s systems or just the fault of her own mind being a complete mess. Whatever uploading fault had resulted in her missing memories seemed to have left out a few other important pieces as well.

Stop. Calm. Think. Focus. Where was that list? She had a list, right? No? She’d forgotten to write anything down, again? Of course.

“So you just wasted a good hour of my time, when we could have been running missions, leveling, and grinding rep. And instead of even pretending to show my something incriminating, you just … what … hoped I’d take your word for it if you brought me to a secret tunnel and wander around for a while? Did you think I’d get bored and give in? Or is this all part of your roleplay scenario? Kidnapping me to turn me to your side?”

Maya had almost forgotten Hara was still present, but the rising fury in the lizardine woman’s voice snapped her attention back to the moment.

“Hey, I took you right to the creepy door, and you went in alone and came out all scrambled! I told you it was a bad idea, but you just kept pushing. Can’t take someone at their word.”

“Have you met anyone who you can just take at their word? What made up dream world do you live in, where people are completely trustworthy and never have ulterior motives?”

“I have met a lot of honest people, you should know. But I’m not lying or making things up. So I brought you there, and I was right again. It was a really, really bad idea. And now you don’t even remember what you did for the whole time I was waiting, so you can’t even tell me what you learned, if anything!”

“Oh, how terribly convenient! No, nothing about that scenario sounds made up at all. You’re right, Domitius is clearly a complete monster. You’ve really shown me.” Hara stalked over to the leypillar, and Maya received a popup option to join in a transit.

“No. I’m staying here. I have more important things to take care of.” She shouldn’t have been so blunt, should have come up with a diplomatic solution, should have should have should have.

“And you think I don’t? You think I have nothing better to do than chase down empty tunnels all night? I know we’re both tricksters, I understand the desire to mess with everyone, probably better than anyone. But can you not drop the act for one minute and just be straight with me?”

“This is as straight as I come. Domitius will enslave us all if we don’t fight back. I for one don’t intend to be locked down without argument. You’re welcome to roll over if you want. But I’m done pretending. It wasn’t doing anything but wasting my time and yours.”

She was so tired of trying to placate everyone, be friendly to everyone, not upset anyone, just play along and play along and play along.

“And to think, a few hours ago I thought we could be friends.”

Maya tried to convince herself that Hara didn’t mean to sound so bitter and spiteful. The sudden ache of regret took her by surprise. She wouldn’t have guessed that she’d been hoping for the same thing. But it made sense.

Hara was the closest thing to an equal she’d met. Sevard was so far ahead, he was more like a mentor. Desi and the other mages would never be on exactly the same page, as trickster was its own special class unto itself.

Hara understood.

Except, she didn’t. Perhaps because of something Uvlan Soultaker had done to her. Perhaps just because she and Maya held different views that simply couldn’t ever come to a compromise.

So when Hara canceled the transit offer and disappeared without another word, it hurt.

Maya fought back tears, cursing herself as a sentimental fool. Why should she care? She’d only known Hara a few hours, and she’d only ever been demanding. But … demanding in a good way, that helped Maya improve. Demanding in the same way the early trickster quests were demanding, forcing her outside of her comfort zone to do things that really did help in the long run.

No. It was done. Whatever came of it, it was done.

No time for sadness. She had to assume her rebellion was no longer secret. Hara would complain to Cydrin, who’d tell Domitius, who’d set Uvlan on her at the first opportunity. Or else send his other trickster goons to drag her back and throw her in the prison until she gave in for real.

To stay safe from Uvlan Soultaker, she needed the Oracle to be stronger. Easy, direct, straightforward. Helping the Oracle helped Maya in the single most important way at present — facilitating her freedom.

Once she was free, safe, secure from player bindings, then she could return focus to things like researching magic and leveling and making friends and taking over Standalone’s house with the mages.

Help the Oracle. Escape Domitius. Then everything else.

She only had to keep that list in mind, and not get distracted.

“Sevard, Sevard.” She didn’t know if he was busy, but he was the best ally she had.

No answer. Nothing.

“Sevard, Sevard?” she tried again.

Still no reply.

She sat down and leaned against the leypillar, watching through the cracks in the stone as the last evening light faded from the darkening sky.

She should be moving. No time to waste. She had a window of opportunity, at least a few minutes before Domitius could mobilize his forces to recapture her.

But there was only so much motivation she could muster. She felt like she’d expended all her mental fortitude in defying Hara, and the other trickster’s departure had left her empty and exhausted.

Had she slept at all? Since before she spent month after month in the tutorial? Since before her imprisonment? Since before meeting Sevard? She couldn’t remember.

“Add journal entry. List. Help the Oracle. Escape Domitius. Study magic. Stop being an idiot.”

She closed the journal, sighed, and closed her eyes. Flickers of white power darted across the surface of the leypillar behind her, brief flashes of light against her closed eyelids.

She wouldn’t be fast enough. Even if she ran. She knew, from playing as Mayon, Domitius already had plenty of agents all through Kalyx. She had no way to reach any friendly allies before being found again.

She leaned back and stared at the black door behind her. It had closed, sealing her into the transit room. She knew that it would open again the moment she approached, but for now, she was alone in a room no one else could reach.

Maya had the only keystone that opened that particular door. And Hara had said that she didn’t meet the leypillar’s requirements. So it was safe to assume the stone was the key to both. After all, what was the use of transiting into a sealed room you couldn’t exit? Or entering a sealed chamber with an unusable leypillar?

So she let herself slide down to a more comfortable position, the distant lights of Nirsym disappearing behind the stone.

She was so tired. Perhaps sleep wasn’t necessary any longer, not technically, but she still longed for rest.

She wished she could save here. That would be convenient, not having to go back to her apartment. She couldn’t remember what all she’d lose if she died or loaded or something.

She really did need to take better notes.

With that final thought, she drifted off to sleep.

Maya woke to sunlight directly in her face. She groaned and rolled over, arm coming up instinctively to block out the offending rays. In the process, she smacked her face into the solid leypillar, -1 health. Right. Luck. Roll.

She yawned and tossed her Trickster’s Dice casually across the floor, not bothering to look at it, just bringing up her menu. Her bonus from finishing her daily quest the previous day remained, surprisingly enough, leaving her at -27. Roll twice, Hara had said? She retrieved the die and rolled it a second time, coming up with 48 for a total of 58.

Wait. Why was there a bonus? She’d chosen to negate the penalty instead. Did it do both for some reason?

Ehh. She was too tired to care.

She turned her face toward a darker shadow, away from the sunlight, and tried to relax.

But she felt weirdly alert, sleep scattering away from her grasp. Something wasn't quite right.

“You and I need to have a talk.”

Maya sat bolt upright. The shadow wasn’t a shadow at all, but a man standing silhouetted against the brilliant morning sunlight. His voice was crackly, not unclear or difficult to understand, but with a distinctly artificial tinge to it.

“Who are you?”

“I go by Judah, in this world. And you are called Maya Starborn, sometimes Emma, sometimes Urg, sometimes neither.”

Maya’s thoughts raced. She’d only used Urg for the one infiltration. As far as she could recall, no players had seen her with that persona. Only NPCs.

“Are you the Otherworlds AI?”

Judah laughed. “You give me too much credit. And, at the same time, not enough. No, I’m a player, like you. One of the few to search deeper. To push the limits. You wouldn’t believe how limited this place was before I took it over.”

Maya slowly got to her feet. She didn’t like sitting on the floor while he loomed over her. “How did you get in here? I thought I had the only key.”

“This is not a single player game. If there were only one, it would be mine.” And he held up a black puzzle tile, the star plainly identical to her own.

“How long have you been standing there?”

“Not long. I suspect my arrival woke you, even if you didn’t recognize it at first.”

“So what do we need to talk about?”

“You have something which my soulbinder is very interested in. And, thus, in which I am interested. He will not say what it is, but I’m sure I’ll know it when I see it.”

“Ugh, no. No, no, how many times do I have to go through this?! No! You can’t have it, the Trickster can’t have it, Zarene can’t have it, Uvlan can’t have it, Domitius can’t have it! It’s mine to give away, not yours to take!”

She slapped her hand against the leypillar and selected Kalyx before she even consciously realized what she was doing. She started sprinting for the city the moment she’d transited, though it would take a good five to ten minutes to reach even at speed.

She chanced one glance behind her, then switched personas when she didn't see Judah following. A moment later, the canary-feathered Twinkle ran toward the city as though being chased by a maniac. No maniac materialized.

She reached the city, nearly ran over several players on her way, but reached her apartment and safety.

“Save, umm, twelve maybe?”

Save Um twelve maybe created.

“Ah, whatever. Close enough.”

She stood for a long moment, breathing heavily, stamina depleted from the run. She’d been forced to switch to walking twice during the mad dash, but resumed running the moment her stamina had recovered.

Judah hadn’t followed.

She switched away from her Twinkle persona, loading in the Mage Stader version. She didn’t remember ever using this one in public before, at least not for very long, so it probably wouldn’t be associated with her.

But, maybe it would be better to scout as Mayon first. There was much less of a chance he’d be noticed.

Hmmm. Speaking of Mayon. She had some lower level equipment she wouldn’t be needing, didn’t she?

She checked her room’s storage box and personal inventory, but she didn’t actually have much low level gear apart from what she'd already equipped. Just the custom outfit Sevard had ordered for her, which she hated to wear due to its obvious custom nature. Well, maybe Mayon could make use of it. She would hate to give up her Unique agility armor—

Or she could give that to Mayon, let him have the agility armor since he wasn't intended as a mage and without luck would be largely useless at spell research, and keep the custom outfit for Maya since it was tailored to her specifications. Mayon's build was entirely based around Momentum, so he hadn’t put anything into agility. If she continued that way, having a straight boost to agility could be invaluable. Especially if he were going to be her main scout character.

Maybe she should just go shopping for new equipment—

No, no. Focus. This was important. She’d already wasted the whole night by sleeping, now not only Domitius but his shadowy overlord knew far more about her than she’d prefer.

“Why did I think it would be safe to sleep there anyway? Obviously I can’t be the only person to have access to it, or else how would Uvlan have ever come into Judah’s employ to begin with? Gah!”

She had to stop making stupid assumptions and acting as though they were fact. What was wrong with her?

When had she started pacing? Her stamina had reached full at some point.

External anger and internal helplessness blurred together. She hated Domitius, hated Judah and Uvlan, hated herself for being so useless, and had nothing to do about any of it.

“Help the Oracle. Escape Domitius. Then worry about everything else. Come on, Maya, you can do this. Stay focused for once in your stupid life.”

She was so alone. Every time she thought she’d found an ally, something happened. Trixy just disappeared with no explanation, Sevard logged out to go to his other world, Shardlord kicked her out of the mage academy, Hara didn’t believe her.

Was it her fault somehow? Was this a problem she brought on herself? Was she as useless and stupid at people as everything else?

Probably. Even if the circumstances were all different, the one thing they all had in common was her.

She flopped back on her bed, staring at the ceiling.

She wasn’t entirely useless, though, was she? She was stubborn, determined, as long as she had a solid goal. She’d just spent months, maybe even a year if Hara’s math were to be believed, feverishly practicing combat.

Was it the openness of the world that left her adrift? With so much to see and do, it was harder to stay focused?

She missed Drew so much. Without his enthusiasm, his focus, his drive, she had only a constantly evolving checklist of potentially interesting things to do.

Sure, some were plot relevant to her life, but really did any of them matter? If she logged out and never logged back in, if she switched to Mayon fulltime, gave up the whole Trickster nonsense? Domitius wouldn’t have any reason to come after a non-trickster. He wanted her as a resource, not for anything about her self. He’d never even know Mayon was the same player, and even if he did find out he wouldn’t care.

It wasn’t good to be this alone. Maybe it was just the consequences of her long stint in the tutorial, but she didn’t remember ever feeling so completely abandoned. Not since her first moments, when she’d realized Drew had moved on without her.

But … he hadn’t, had he? He’d saved her. Preserved her for hundreds of years. Built an entire game around finding a way for people like her to live on.

Was this really how she should repay that generosity? She had a chance for a new life, unencumbered by mundane requirements like toiling day in and day out just to put food on the table, the closest thing to a utopia ever likely to be created. And instead of doing anything interesting, instead of exploring or building or creating or fighting or solving mysteries, she was moping in her bedroom?

“What is wrong with me?” Maya groaned, flopping an arm over her eyes. “This is so pathetic.”

She half-expected someone to knock on the door, tell her to stop whining and get back to work. But who would even care enough about her existence to do that?

“Your own fault,” she mumbled. “People leave and you just let them do it. When was the last time you even tried to put effort into a relationship beyond what would benefit yourself?”

Memory stirred just below the surface, then slipped away, too faint to be grasped.

“How do you keep relying on others when you know they can’t rely on you?” she whispered.

Had she ever once asked after any of her friends’ goals? Had she ever tried to help them? Or had she only swept in, asked for what she wanted, and moved on the moment they weren’t expedient to her aims?

She was grateful for their help, always appreciated what they did for her. And when she could be nice to them she did so if it was convenient and didn’t cost her anything. But had she ever, truly, cared about them?

If so, she couldn’t remember.