THE WEIGHT OF A HEART

Stone cold bed, surrounded by empty walls, reminded Fen’er of her childhood days. Stretched lazily atop her sanctuary, she stared at the ceiling, eyes seemingly indifferent, yet with her heart racing. Her mind was in peril, and she was unable to calm down.

She had come back home over a month ago, and had lived the life Ion had prophesied nearly to the last detail. Shortly after her return, her father took her to the Underground Palace, where she had met with the terrible existence Ion spoke of. Those violet eyes, embedded into the darkness surrounding them, had been haunting her ever since.

She had learned from her father that the Young Lord is, in truth, a False God – an existence born purely by accident, with the death of a Primordial God.

Their very existence goes against the nature of things, which is why he had been imprisoned since its inception. To kill it was impossible at the time, as it would cause the entire world to become unstable, and, over time, its very existence had been forgotten as new generations inhabited the worlds.

All of this was too much for her to process, and she had holed herself up in her room, leaving rarely. Although her father never admitted it openly, she had been able to conclude a few things on her own; by the virtue of releasing it, the rest of the realm will have to die, with only her and her kinsmen being spared. However, it appears that the creature’s ultimate goal is that of revenge, which could affect countless other realms.

In addition, she had understood why her father sent her to Gallows; had she never met Ion, she’d have probably accepted it all by the virtue of who she had become, and became yet another one of it’s minions. Yet, she now stood at the crossroads, as her decision would affect not only her, but perhaps the rest of the realm as well.

With six names in constant circulation through her mind, she weighed one over another, but had ultimately failed to make a decision. She could only delay, but even that had its limits, as the plans for the Ceremony are reaching the final preparations.

“… ugh, why’d you have to show up in front of me, old man?” she muttered, sinking into deep sleep.

**

Lynne and Fen’er were the only ones sitting inside a small tavern, talking over cups of drank ale. Thalia and Parsia parted shortly after they came to the tavern, deciding to go back and begin preparations for the battle, while Lynne remained with her because he had nothing else to do.

“Tough shit,” he said, gulping down the last of the ale. “You have a grandpa who’s hiding in the middle of a fucking mountain, a father who wants to massacre an entire realm for his God, a mother who lets him do it and encouraged you to do it as well… wow, your family is more screwed up than mine.”

“Doubt it,” Fen’er chuckled, leaning onto her hand as she glanced through the window. “Your mother is a Priestess of the strongest clan in the universe,” she added, looking back at him. “Yet, your name wasn’t amongst the six grandpa gave me. Perhaps he thought you were far out of reach for me.”

“Yet, here I am,” Lynne said, snickering. “Drinking ale with a woman who tried to kill me… multiple times. Damn, how times have changed. Plus, you’re also young. This is practically going against every rule of my religion.”

“Eh, religion?” Fen’er raised her eyebrows as she asked.

“Aye, it’s named after me: Lynneism. Rules go as follows: one, never get involved with women younger than thirty under any circumstances; two, whenever you drink, drink until you pass out; three, never study Magic, even if the whole world is falling apart,” Lynne chuckled bitterly as he continued. “Four, don’t bother with friendships; five, in case I break any of these rules, I need to escape into the mountains for five years to reforge myself.”

“Ha ha,” Fen’er laughed lightly, her cold, indifferent face briefly turning passionate. “It sounds like a rulebook of a lonely, angsty teenager if you ask me.”

“Isn’t it funny how circumstances of your birth determine half your life?” Lynne said, playing with a cup in his hand. “For the longest while, I believed I could remove myself from the equation of who I was appointed by birth. Yet, day by day, event by event, I was continuously proven wrong.”

“Nah,” Fen’er shook her head slightly as she spoke. “Your birth determines your starting place. What you do after, though? That’s all up to you. Look at me; do you think it was easy betraying my own family for strangers? No… but I still did it. I, as you say, ‘removed’ myself.”

“Ah,” Lynne sighed, sinking onto the table. “I still can’t believe I actually joined in on this suicidal mission. What the hell was I thinking? I had a plan: go East and don’t stop, dammit! Yet, here I am, entangled in yet another mess I could have avoided completely had I just listened to my reason.”

“I don’t think your reason was telling you to abandon these people,” Fen’er said, smiling lightly. “I mean-”

“Please don’t smile… whenever you do, I feel like you’re just about to kill all of the people here. It’s creepy.” Lynne interrupted her, his expression deadpan.

“… ah, why am I even bothering,” Fen’er said, sighing. “You sure surpass your reputation.”

“But, you’re right,” Lynne added. “And wrong. I haven’t spent over a year in Gallows, tempering my heart. I’ve spent my youth, instead, in brothels and taverns, not unlike this one. The first time I killed someone, I was seventeen years old. However, I managed to bury it inside of me as a one-time accident I was pushed to do. Ha ha, how naive I was back then, huh?”

“You and I are alike, you know?” she said, leaning back. “Just dealing with different difficulties. For me, killing someone has gotten natural, however terrible that sounds. However, unlike you, I’m akin to a statue when it comes to people. You, on the other hand, seemed to have been born with talent to either disarm or kill people with your words.”

“Born? No way. That’s years and years of practice, young lady.”

“… I’m older than you, you know that?”

“Hey, even if I screwed up some of the rules of my religion, I’m still sticking to the main one: any woman under the age of thirty is a young lady to me.”

“You’re really driving your issues to the next level here, huh…” Fen’er smiled bitterly as she looked at him. “However, I’m glad.”

“Glad?” Lynne looked up, arching his brows.

“That, this time around, I’m fighting with, not against you. You may not know it, but during the Battle of Holy Paradise, when your scythe blighted the sky, all I could think of was: ‘Wow, sure am glad he’s not aiming at me!’. You can be quite scary, you know that?”

“The day my scythe blighted the sky, huh…” Lynne sighed, sitting back up as he glanced through the window. “Perhaps should have been my last…”

“… I imagined you’ve been wailing over it for quite some time,” she said, somewhat surprised. “But I thought you’d at least get over it by now.”

“…” Lynne glanced at her strangely, his eyes somewhat lost and empty. “Why is it that everyone keeps telling me the same thing, over and over again? All of you seem to think that just because I’m entangled in this world, I’m also a part of it. You know, I had long since realized I can’t escape any of this.” he said, smiling bitterly. “For better or worse, I’m talented at Magic, and, in the long run, I figured I could do some good with who I am. In the end though, however much I accepted that, it’s not who I am.”

“It’s that kind of a world,” Fen’er said. “Where who you are matters little if you wish to make any change. All I can say that it will never get easier,” she added, her eyes slightly sunken. “But, do you know what helps?”

“Hm?”

“Realizing that life isn’t a primrose path, but rather one of thorns. We aren’t mortals, Lynne. To them, we’re either gods or devils, depending on what we do. To people of Skyfire, you are a God. To people of Elvernheimn – and my own – you are a Devil. In this world, we’re defined by what we do, not who we are. Although we can’t be heroes that save the world, we can be those little dots in history that had saved a town, and killed a big baddie. Just like in fairy tales, no?” she smiled lightly, and even Lynne had to admit, at the moment, that she appeared beautiful.

“Hai, you missed my point; I don’t want to be a hero, I want to be a whore! Whore myself out to beautiful maidens till I tire out!” Lynne exclaimed grandiosely.

“… just how many layers of defensive mechanisms do you actually have?”

“Ugh, you have no idea. Sometimes, even I can’t figure out what I’m feeling due to their presence.”

“… that’s one of the saddest things I’ve heard in my life.”

“Don’t pity me, for I am –ugh, how does the saying go?”

“Ha ha…”

“Shut up! Why’d we stop drinking anyway? Ugh, you taught me a valuable lesson. Whenever I go out drinking with people, I should stick to drinking. Otherwise conversations begin. And, of course, conversations are bad.”

“Hey, can I ask you for a favor?” she suddenly asked.

“Hm? No, I won’t sleep with you.”

“… why do you assume all women just want to sleep with you?”

“I don’t,” Lynne replied plainly. “I just want to cover all my bases.”

“Consider them covered,” Fen’er shrugged. “Anyway, when you’re fighting, if you spot my father, let me know.”

“Why?” Lynne asked, his expression growing slightly serious.

“… I don’t know,” she sighed, lowering her head slightly. “I just feel like I have to be the one, you know? Whatever his faults are, he was still a good father to me. If I’m going to betray everything he believes in and stab him in the back, I can at least do it to his face.”

“… sure,” Lynne agreed. “Do what you have to do.”

“Shall we?”

“Aye, go pay.”

“… I don’t have any money.”

“… fuck you. You told me you’ll pay for it!”

“Heh, I lied.”

“… lying witch.”

“Ah, come on, be a gentlemen once in your life. Then, you can finally say you paid something for a woman… and not the woman herself.”

“…”

“Heh.”

The two left the tavern as they began walking towards the inn Lynne was staying at, as that’s where Fen’er decided to stay as well until invasion. The night hung dark across the sky and the streets were comparatively empty. The city, still doused in confusion and fear, was eerily silent, with only the footsteps of the two echoing through the streets.

As they inched over the corner, Lynne recognized a familiar figure walking towards them, and Selena recognized him as her eyes shifted towards Fen’er standing next to him. As their eyes met, a shockwave between the two erupted.

“Lady Enceinte…” Fen’er muttered, her eyes wide with shock.

As if jolted by a bolt from the sky, Lynne’s eyes widened as Selena’s expression grimed. She suddenly raised her arms as two bloodied bolts appeared, flinging them towards Fen’er. Still frozen, she was unable to react in time, but Lynne did; he immediately summoned Emperor’s Scythe and swung it at the incoming bloodied bolts. The explosion boomed out, devastating the street they were in, causing buildings to collapse as the dust storm arose. Flashes of beautiful flames burned in the night, as the eruptive shockwaves sent the three backwards like cannonballs, with the entire city coming under fire of screams and shrieks of fear and terror.