SMALL GIRL AND A BIG MAN

Lynne’s brows were currently creased, his eyes focused, expression that of determination. His right hand was gently stroking his chin while his left was playing with a dice. Surrounding him were two men and two women, and in-between them were several neatly stacked decks of cards.

They were currently holed up in a small alleyway, hidden behind a group of boxes, each with a strange gleam in their eyes. Next to the stack of cards were groups of Mana Stones, each shining as brightly as the one next to it.

“Come on kid, roll.” one of the men urged Lynne.

“Patience old fart,” Lynne replied. “It’s all about knowing how to kiss Lady Luck’s ass so hard she’ll get annoyed and let you win.”

“… I don’t know about Lady Luck, but you’re pretty annoying to me at the moment.”

“Same.”

“Yup.”

“Pretty much.”

“Ugh, what a fine group you are,” Lynne grunted as he threw the dice. “Come on baby, give me a five. A five and I’ll make your day alight.”

The dice rolled through the ragged, stone path, while Lynne’s eyes intensely watched its every movement. He got so engrossed in it he nearly fell over forward, but managed to hold himself up at the last second.

“Seriously?! Gambling?!” a familiar voice startled him as he turned his head around.

“Hey mom, what are you doing here?” he said, looking lazily at Thalia.

“… call me mom one more time and I’ll castrate you.” Thalia replied angrily.

“That’s no good,” Lynne shook his head. “Find some other form of punishment. Imagine if dad didn’t have his tool, what would the two of you do all day lo--”

“Let’s go you bastard!!” Thalia pinched his ear, pulling him out of the alleyway.

“No, wait, mom, shit! My dice! My Mana Stone!! My ass-kissing!”

“…”

The two entered a busy street filled with shops left and right. People ran amok, each one racing towards a different goal. Carriages pulled by horses drove through the middle of the street, causing stench so hard Lynne nearly fainted. The streets paved in stone ran in a square-like manner, and the two followed it towards the most busy building in the entire city: Royal Pavilion.

The building was seven stories high, each floor separated by a wooden pole upon which various symbols were carved. The building was the location most sought after for the past few days, as this was the place one registered in for the upcoming tournament.

Lynne and Thalia, naturally, had no desire to enroll, but it wasn’t the same for the Prince himself, who was standing in the row neatly, his expression that of joy and expectation. Lynne watched him from the side, shaking his head lightly, while Thalia smiled gently.

“Really?” Lynne said, casting her an odd glance. “Of all the men in the world, you choose one already taken?”

“W-what are you talking about?” Thalia replied, quickly looking away from the Prince.

“I mean, I get it,” Lynne nodded, looking at Parsia. “He’s handsome, he’s strong, he’s smart, he’s kind… he’s like the exact opposite of you. People always yearn for what they can’t have… or in your case be.”

“… when did you become a love expert?”

“Heh, you might not know this, but I’m the writer of the famous ‘Art of Bewitching The Hearts of Lonely and Beautiful Maidens Underneath the Sun and Moon and Sky by the Words of Great Lovemaking Lynne’. I’ve always been an expert on love.”

“Wait, is that an actual thing? Like it’s in a print?” Thalia asked in disbelief.

“Uh… well, not yet, but I’m working on it.”

“… you keep working buddy.” Thalia patted his shoulder, giving him a look of pity.

“I don’t think I need to tell you, though,” Lynne said, his tone somewhat serious. “But it’s fruitless. That guy probably sees you more as a plank of wood than a woman he’d bed.”

“… I know.” she said, sighing.

“But it’s good to know the Great Witch Thalia can feel,” Lynne teased, smiling. “I started believing you were a stone-cold bitch.”

“… no, that’s you.”

“You mean stone-cold badass?”

“No, not stone-cold. Just bitch.” Thalia said.

“It’s his turn,” Lynne said. “Ah, look at that innocent face. He looks like a teenager who’s about to enter a brothel for the first time.”

“… is everything about you tied in to brothels in one way or another?”

“No,” Lynne shook his head. “Most things are, though.”

“Excuse me, Mister,” a childish voice startled the two, causing them to quickly turn around; behind them was a small girl, not older than ten, wearing plain, commoner’s clothing, barefoot. She had golden hair running past her shoulder, tied in braids, with eyes penetratingly green. Her cheeks were plump and red, face slightly freckled. “Do you know where my dad is?”

“… I don’t even know who your dad is, so how the f--”

“What’s your name sweetie?” Thalia punched him lightly as she crouched down, smiling at the girl.

“It’s Layla.” the girl said, smiling back. “What’s yours sis?”

“I’m Thalia,” the two shook hands rather cutely. “Did you get lost?”

“No,” Layla shook her head. “But I think my dad did. He’s got a very bad sense of direction. My sisters are also looking for him.”

“Come with us,” Thalia said, offering her hand to the girl which Layla took. “We’ll help you look for him. Won’t we Lynne?”

“… but mom.”

“No ‘but mom’,” Thalia pricked him lightly. “Be a good boy and do as you’re told. What does your dad look like Layla?” she then asked the little girl.

“Big,” Layla replied, smiling and revealing her slightly crooked smile. “Very big! And big smile! And big eyes!”

“And I imagine a big di--”

“Lynne!” Thalia looked at him angrily. “Are you utterly insane?”

“… I’m just trying to anger you enough so that you can send me away.”

“… just help a little girl find her dad. Is that so hard? Or are you deeply against doing anything kind and good?”

“Both.”

“…”

“Ugh, fine, lead the way. I’ll keep my eyes out for a big guy. Oh look, there’s one. And another. And another. Ah, would you imagine? Nearly everyone here is big.”

“…”

Lynne eventually got entangled into the whole hand-holding ordeal, causing the trio to be the focus of many glances as they ventured through the streets, looking for a big guy. Thalia and Layla spent most of the time chatting, while Lynne begrudgingly followed, looking for a way to remove himself from the hand-hold equation.

“Half the city thinks we’ve got a kid together,” Lynne said as they stopped to buy Layla some bread. “That inadvertently means they think we’ve had sex. Aren’t you ashamed of hypothetically having sex with me?”

“Maybe we’ve adopted her,” Thalia replied bluntly. “After all, I adopted you.”

“… I just realized that, in this hypothetical universe, I’m in love with a woman who’s technically my mother, and I’ve seen her shag a guy my age that’s technically my father, but eventually we got together and adopted a kid. Or made one. That’s up for debate. That’s one major mindfuck.”

“… your mind operates in very, very strange ways.” Thalia said.

“Disturbing is the word you’re looking for.” Lynne said, smiling.

“Dad!!” Layla suddenly yelled out towards a man standing a few meters away, inspecting a steel sword.

“Holy shit, he’s really big!!” Lynne’s jaw grew agape as he spotted the man; he was over two meters tall, with seemingly every inch of his body covered in muscles. His skin was toned, jaw squared, hair spiky. “Shit, imagine the size of his--”

“How about we don’t.” Thalia interrupted.

“Oh, Layla?!” the man turned around and smiled gently as he picked up the girl in his arms. “What are you doing here?”

“You’ve been gone for so long we thought you got lost.” Layla said.

“Ha ha,” the man laughed. “Well… you weren’t wrong. How did you find me?”

“Big brother and sister helped me,” Layla pointed at Lynne and Thalia. “They even bought be bread, look!”

“Oh?” the man looked at Lynne and Thalia, coming up to them slowly, smiling. “Thank you very much, little ones. I’m sorry if she was too much of a hassle.”

“No, not at all,” Thalia smiled back, looking gently at the girl. “She was an angel.”

“I’m Theor,” the man said. “And you are?”

“Thalia. This boorish looking child here is Lynne.” she pointed at Lynne who was still staring at Theor in awe.

“Technically her adopted son, lover and father of our hypothetical child. Made or adopted, still debating.” Lynne extended his hand.

“Right?” Theor shook it, smiling somewhat. “Anyway, at least let me make it up to you, huh? Let me cook you dinner! I may have terrible sense of direction, but I’m definitely an amazing cook!”

“Daddy definitely is!” Layla nodded, her arms wrapped around the man’s large neck.

“Sure!” Lynne immediately agreed, his eyes shining, mouth salivating.

“… at least try to look courteous.”

“Courteous people die of starvation, and I’m about to.” Lynne said.

“Ha ha,” Theor laughed. “Good, I like people with big appetite. Let’s go! Ah… Layla, if you could lead the way…”

“He he, of course!”

The group moved towards the outer reaches of the city, quickly reaching the living district. Houses sprung up, left and right, mostly the same with some exceptions. Layla led them towards a simple looking house, akin to those surrounding it. It was a single floor brick house with a small porch.

Insides echoed the exterior with the simple design; a kitchen, bedroom and a small resting room was all there was to it. Theor led them to a squared table and poured them some wine as he went to prepare the dinner, while Layla stayed behind and kept the two company.

Soon, though, the house began being slightly… filled up. One after another, women and girls of various ages began pouring in, greeting Lynne and Thalia. By the time the dinner was done, the house was full-packed with Lynne, Thalia, Theor and his seventeen daughters.

“Holy crap, it’s not only big…” Lynne muttered.

“Shh!” Thalia slapped him lightly.

“Ha ha,” Theor laughed out loud as he sat down, with one of his daughters slowly bringing out plates of food. “Sorry, I didn’t expect all my girls would be back so soon. It’s a bit crowded in here.”

“Ha ha, don’t worry about it,” Thalia laughed while Lynne had already lunged into eating, ignoring everything else, mainly because all girls here were younger than thirty. “You have a lovely home.”

“Thank you.” Theor smiled as he himself began eating. “Are the two of you here for the tournament?” he asked.

“A friend of ours is,” Thalia said. “We’re here to support him.”

“Ah, he’s a very luck person.” Theor said. “Friends are rare to find nowadays… however, husbands are everywhere! Did you know that Enna was proposed to eleven times in just these past few months?!”

“Dad!!” a girl looking to be in her mid-twenties exclaimed, her cheeks slightly red.

“But she keeps refusing them! All of them do!” Theor sighed. “I don’t know what I’ll do with them…”

“There’s no one as good as dad!” Layla exclaimed, happily laughing.

“Ha ha,” Theor laughed, his laughter resounding like a roar. “However, it looks like we’ll have to find a bigger house quickly. Most of us sleep on the floor nowadays.” Don’t offer our help… don’t offer our help… don’t offer our help… Lynne chanted inwardly as he ate.

“We could help you out,” Thalia said. Dammit, I thought we had this mental connection! “Right Lynne?”

“Right, of course!” Lynne exclaimed, startled.

“Ah, I shouldn’t impose…” Theor scratched his nose, slightly embarassed.

“You aren’t,” Thalia said. “It’s a rare thing to find such a happy home nowadays. I’d be going against everything I believe in if I didn’t help you guys out. As would Lynne. Right, Lynne?”

“Right, of course! Kind and generous gentleman cannot – I mean, yeah, of course.”

A chunk of people ate and drank merrily, deep into the night, while the laughter resonated out from the small home in the outer reaches. On the other side of the town, the Prince was inspecting a massive lance coated in gold, whilst wondering where his friends disappeared to when they promised they’d help him out.