CONFESSIONS

Two days until the execution day, Lynne was sitting in a small, corner tavern of the Holy Paradise. On his table were several dozen empty kegs and gourds, and his eyes were bloodshot red. The buzz and noise of the dancing crowd in front didn’t get to him, and even the foul stench was blocked off.

For the past two days, he had fallen into a routine of getting drunk and passing out, then waking up and getting drunk again. This was his sixth hour sitting in the same corner, avoiding judging eyes and stares, burning away thoughts with the cheapest drinks.

On his way back to the inn, he wobbled left and right, letting his innards out every so often, taking him nearly half a day to walk several dozen miles back. The night had long sunk in, crescent moon hanging above, surrounded by shimmering stars. Howls of the wolves echoed deep into the forest, and a gentle breeze caused grass and weed to sway gently. Yet, Lynne ignored the world around him; doused in the empty thoughts, mind derailed beyond repair, he stopped by a small lamp post and crashed onto the floor, his head hanging low.

The streets around him were empty, lights inside small, wooden houses dimmed, noises brushed off by his swollen cheeks. He muttered indescribably into his jaw, weaving his fingers through the air as if painting a picture.

Just a few dozen meters away, walking slowly through a dirt path, Elynal was looking at a map of Holy Paradise underneath the light of a floating candle. He was doing some rough calculations when he heard faint mumbling; looking over, he spotted a hunched, middle-aged man wobbling left and right, falling over a few times as he lost balance. The man’s clothes were ragged and his smell foul, with his eyes having turned completely red.

Although he had never seen the man before, he felt a strange sense of familiarity with him nonetheless, so he approached slowly.

“Hey,” Elynal said in a low voice, trying not the startle the man. “You okay sir?”

“Hm? Ah~,” Lynne only saw a blur, but recognized the familiar voice. “If it isn’t the almighty Prince! Hic~hail the Prince! Certainly Sir!” as Lynne tried to bow down, he slipped over his own foot and fell down, head first. “Ouch! Aoo! Ah, my nose! Oh, I can smell things again! Hic~good lord, I stink like mermaid’s ass!”

“Eh?” Elynal arched his brow as he stared at the man.”… wait, no. You… you’re not called… Lynne, right?”

“How else, huh? You~hic~great Prince wishes to steal my name?!” Lynne shook his head. “No, no! Name’s all I got! Hic~take it all… wait, no, take all~hic~except my name.”

“… what are you doing?” Elynal quickly helped him up, throwing Lynne’s arm around his shoulder and slowly carrying him. “Here? Drunk? Looking like an old man?”

“Hic~I’m so proud! Great Prince~hic~ is taking care of me! He he…”

“Ugh,” Elynal suddenly put his index finger on Lynne’s forehead, causing Lynne’s eyes to go blank and his breathing to calm as he limped over. “Here we go.”

Carrying him on his shoulders, Elynal strode over to the village he was staying in through the cover of the night. He brought Lynne into a small hut, gently laying him down before walking over to a small table and grounding some herbs into a powder, mixing them with foul-smelling liquid and helping Lynne to drink a few gulps.

Lynne suddenly coughed, waking up, holding onto his burning throat; his mind suddenly gained clarity, causing his confusion to disappear, leaving him level-headed. He looked over to his left and saw a familiar face looking at him strangely.

“… what are the damn chances?” Lynne grumbled in a low voice, leaning back onto a small, wooden pole. “What are you doing here?”

“That’s my question.”

“I asked first.”

“I asked you while I was carrying you here.”

“Didn’t hear, don’t recall, doesn’t count.”

“… I told you I was coming here,” Elynal said. “With the execution and all.”

“Ah,” Lynne sighed softly. “Then why are you staying in this buttplace in the middle of nowhere instead of the Palace?”

“… what’s going on Lynne?” Elynal asked, sitting down. “Why were you drunk, and why the hell are you a middle-aged man?”

“When’s the execution?” Lynne asked instead.

“In two days.”

“… why’d you sober me up?” Lynne grumbled. “I only had two more days to go.”

“Okay, seriously, what the hell’s going on?” Elynal asked, finally worried. “I can’t believe I’m going to say this, but… for all your wrongs, I never thought I’d add idiotically drinking without purpose to the list.” Lynne looked at him strangely, and Elynal suddenly recalled the day the two of them met; although he quickly realized Lynne was simply fronting, that brief moment when Lynne threatened him, left Elynal with cold sweat, feeling that Lynne meant every single word.

“Did you bring Anna back home?”

“I couldn’t,” Elynal said, sighing. “Her parents have locked down the Capital. Apparently they rebelled.”

“King and Queen can rebel?” Lynne scoffed silently. “The world is a strange place.”

“Why are you here?”

“Same as you,” Lynne said. “To witness the execution.”

“Somehow… I don’t believe you.”

“Do you have anything to drink?”

“No,” Elynal suddenly sat next to Lynne, gripping his shoulder tightly. “Now, you’re going to tell me why you’re here, else I’m going to bring you into a sauna with ten thousand girls under the age of twenty and have them have their way with you.”

“Goddamn you’re ruthless!” Lynne shivered slightly as he backed up a bit.

“… and, here you are, the Lynne I know. Now, seriously, tell me what happened? You saved my life once, and if there’s anything I can do to help you with, you know I will!”

“Well, technically, you saved my life afterwards, so--”

“Dammit Lynne!!”

“… can you stop the execution?” Lynne asked after a short silence.

“Eh?”

“Do you know that, the first day I saw you and learned who you were, I swore to myself that, one day, I’ll find a way to kill you?” Lynne asked, sighing.

“Why?” Elynal asked back calmly, letting go of Lynne’s shoulder and sitting across from him.

“… you’re part of the reason I’m here today,” Lynne said truthfully, chuckling lowly. “If my life had gone as I had planned, I’d be spitting coins in a brothel now, enjoying magnificent maidens till my throat is dry and my purse empty of coin. Do you really think I wanted to become a Magus?” Lynne fiddled with his fingers as he spoke, his voice growing ever so solemn. “Since the day I understood what that entailed, I evaded it like a disease. All this world represents is all I’ve always hated.”

“I was simply supposed to inherit my father’s position, and live out the rest of my life as a simple, ordinary person. Instead, it all fell apart like a house of cards,” Lynne suddenly lifted up his head, looking at Elynal with tearful eyes, causing the latter to feel cold shivers run down his spine. “In two days, Elynal, you will be executing the only person I’ve ever loved in my life. You’ll be destroying the only true reason I’ve worked like an idiot for the past year. The reason I gave up everything I ever loved just for a possibility… a slim chance… a hopeful lie…”

“Y-you’re Lynne… Lynne Hyord! Median’s son!!” Elynal exclaimed as if a thunderbolt fell from the sky atop his mind, causing it to lose its function for a moment.

“Aye,” Lynne said. “I’m his son. The son he probably believes is dead. And you, you’re a Prince – First one at that – of the Kingdom that trampled over my home, killed everyone I knew and tortured my father for over a year before settling to finally end his misery. Still… I only wanted to kill you once in my entire life,” Lynne added, smiling and mockingly chuckling at himself. “Then, I grew to know you… and like you. And I forgot who you were. Ah, rather, I decided to bury it deep inside my mind. Now, here I am, confessing everything to you. Ha ha,” Lynne suddenly laughed. “Ah, I wonder how many times dad would slap me if he knew.”

“… forgive me!” Elynal suddenly plummeted onto the floor, kowtowing over and over again, gritting his teeth so much they began to bleed. “I’m so sorry… I… if I knew I…”

“Oi, oi, what the hell are you doing?” Lynne backed up, startled.

“What else can I do?” Elynal’s voice broke slightly as he held back tears. “I’ve spent over a year with you, reminding you of everything every day. I… fuck, I even joked about your father!!”

“Hey, hey, get the hell up!!” Lynne quickly pulled him up, staring confusingly at the person before him. “If you had known, then it would have been very, very awkward when you joked about my father.”

“… your father,” Elynal said. “Is the person I admire the most, Lynne. I’ve spent years reading books about his war endeavors, read every single one of his speeches at least a dozen times… and, in the end, he’s the reason I wanted to become a military general. When I found out that Highlind fell, I… fuck, why’d you bring me up?! I still haven’t apologized enough!!”

“You have!!” Lynne interrupted. “I don’t need you to apologize. You didn’t even do anything. It’s my own fault for being so weak that I ended up the way I did.”

“Weak?” Elynal smiled bitterly as he spoke. “You’re not weak Lynne. If anything, you’re the strongest person I’ve ever met in my life. You spent a year with Anna and me, joking, bantering, talking… you wore the smile like it’s a crown. You even risked your life for us… everyone with a bit of talent can become a Magus, Lynne, but strong people are rare. Take me, for example. No matter what I do for the rest of my life, I’ll never be strong.”

“Ever since my younger brother was born, I was cast aside by my parents,” Elynal continued, suddenly taking out two gourds of wine and handing one over to Lynne. “Year after a year, I watched them devote the entirety of themselves to him. Then, a few years back, while he was still the First Prince, someone tried to assassinate him. Then my parents, fearing it would happen again, proposed I take a dangerous pill to forcibly increase my strength, staggering my future completely. I did it, without a second thought, thinking I’d finally gain their approval. Instead? They shipped me off to a sect in another Kingdom, and severed all ties with me. And, what did I do? Nothing. I instead took pride in being the First Prince for a while, and completely played the role as if they were playing the tune.”

“… wow,” Lynne sighed, taking a gulp of wine, burning his throat lightly. “You had it tough.”

“No,” Elynal shook his head. “I had it easy. All I had to do was say no. What the hell could they have done? Nothing. Half the council supported me instead of my little brother back then. But I caved and, afterwards, my support disappeared. Why? Because I took the easy way out.”

“You think I didn’t?” Lynne chuckled lowly.

“You didn’t have a choice, Lynne,” Elynal said. “You said it yourself: you never wanted to become a Magus… yet you have. You trained and trained, not because you truly wanted to, but because you saw a way out, a way to help yourself. Me? I bent over. I neither wanted to bend over nor needed to, but I still did. You, instead, decided to fight against the fate itself. You knew you were up against everyone… and you were alone… yet you still decided to try. How can you be weak? If I had your strength, I wouldn’t be here Lynne. I’d be in that Palace, fighting my father to death to save yours.”

“… thanks.” Lynne smiled lightly. “That means a lot to me.”

“No,” Elynal shook his head. “I will try – no, I’m going to – save your father, even if it costs me my life.”

“Whoa, whoa! Pull the breaks hothead! I was just sarcastically proposing something to prove some weird, juvenile point! I never expected you to actually save my dad!”

“Ha ha,” Elynal laughed lightly, taking a sip of the wine. “I had begun planning to save your father for some time now Lynne.”

“Eh?”

“While I can never be truly strong, I decided not to be a coward anymore. My little brother is a terrible person, and my father is ten times worse. If this truly transcends into dynasty… our Kingdom will be besieged from all sides and eradicated from the annals of history by the time I die. On the day of the execution, I plan to rebel.”

“… you’re absolutely insane.” Lynne exclaimed lowly. “I love it!”

“You in?”

“Aye.” Lynne said. “Oh, I already fought your brother once,” he added. “Not as strong as I expected. I actually managed to injure him.”

“Oh, that wound was from you? Nice! He’s been crying about it ever since he came back!”

“… I never enjoyed seeing a person hate his brother as much as I do at the moment.”

“I’ll let you in on a secret.” Elynal added in a low voice.

“Oh, besides the whole rebelling thing?”

“Your Nameless Lady,” Elynal said with a chuckle. “Is on our side.”

“No way!!”

“And her name is Lady Ella Wull. So, please, stop referring to her as a Nameless Lady.”

“Yes!! Thanks. I mean it.”

“No, thank you,” Elynal said, lifting up the gourd into the air. “For trusting me enough.”

“I actually half-expected us to fight to death in this very hut.”

“… don’t ruin it.”

“Right, right. To trust,” the two toasted and drank the rest of the gourd. “And Nameless Lady!”

“Lynne…”

“I mean Lady Ella!”

“… you know, the only reason I left out on a walk tonight, was because I felt fidgety sitting and reading the map.”

“Must have been one hell of a map.”

“… you’re really good at ruining stuff, aren’t you?”

“It’s the deeply-rooted emotional disability due to my dysfunctional childhood.”

“… like how you like older women because you never had a mother?”

“Exactly.”

“Wait, you’re aware of that?”

“Of course I am,” Lynne said in a matter-of-fact way. “I may be a complete buffoon, but I still know who I am.”

“… and you’re fine with it?”

“If you ever bedded an older woman, you’d be fine with it too.”

“Gross.”

“Screw you.”

The two chatted deep into the night, eventually passing out as they got drunk. Silently, the drums of war begun playing, and the air within the Holy Paradise stiffened. The earth beneath trembled lightly, and hearts of men began beating in unison. The day of the execution approached.