MAKING FRIENDS

Lynne and the royal duo were currently rushing through a lush forest, suspended high on a staggering cliff. The forest was good fifteen miles long, and filled to brim with one or two Evolutions creatures. However, that wasn’t the reason they were speeding as if they were being chased by a demon. Some time ago, they were happily walking on the main road, unaware of the worldly troubles, when they stumbled upon a group of six people.

The group of six had taken a liking to Lynne’s Phoenix, and wanted to take it for themselves. In response, Lynne spat out his usual rhetoric, claiming that the Phoenix was almost a million years old beast that his grandma inherited from her grandma. He then claimed that the Phoenix was bound to his soul, and that break that bond was extremely painful, and that he didn’t want to do it. However, he also told them that he was willing if they were to take out ten million gold coins and fifty high-ranked herbs.

Conceited due to their greater strength, the group of six thought nothing of it and handed Lynne what he wanted. Lynne then proceeded to spout some random sounds akin to an ancient language, and contort around the floor in pain as Phoenix himself began screeching and howling, as if he was being torn to bits and pieces. After about half an hour of world-renowned acting, Lynne got up from the floor and began singing to the Phoenix as he urged the little creature to move forward.

However, halfway through the ordeal, the blinding light suddenly erupted as the Phoenix transformed. Lynne quickly picked up Anna and Elynal and threw himself atop the Phoenix, whereupon the bird gallantly rose to the sky and flew away.

However, Lynne had underestimated the group of six; it has been four full days since the chase had begun. The Phoenix had to rest twice during the process, but, luckily, out of the group of six, only one was still able to chase after them, and even he was showing signs of slowing down.

Eventually, Lynne and the royal duo reached the cliff’s end, whereupon the Phoenix grew in size yet again, and the trio jointly mounted it as they flew off. The chasing figure could only look at the sky and erupt in endless curses, but it was all in vain.

Lynne was laughing like a madman, salivating profusely, as he inspected the inner dimension of a ring. Another ten million gold coins, plus fifty high-ranked herbs! Is everyone in the outside world complete moron?! Ha ha, I have to thank the damn bird, I didn’t think he was world-renowned actor as well. He then quickly began to communicate with the bird; since the Phoenix was one evolution off from being able to mimic human speech, Lynne had to talk to it through their mind connection.

“Ha ha, damn bird, you really are amazing!” Lynne laughed joyfully, as if he was a small child. “Tell this granddaddy, what do you want as a reward?”

“Heh, if you could concoct me a nice, Rank 10 Frozen Soul Pill, I’d be able to evolve again.”

“Ha ha, no problem, no problem! I’ll concoct you a damn, fertile egg if you want! Ha ha!”

“Lynne,” he was suddenly interrupted by Anna, who stared at him somewhat strangely. “Do you even know who those six people were?”

“Brainless morons? Absolute idiots? Braindead shrimps?”

“….”

“They were from Divine Slaughter Sect!!” Elynal rebuked, a tinge of fear present in his voice. “They were probably just a part of the young group… ah… traveling with you is like crossing seven rivers of hell!”

“Divine Slaughter Sect?! What’s that? Are they that brainless that they claim they’re somehow divine? Peh! I piss on their claims! They want to take what’s mine? Peh! I only take what’s mine! They want to rob me in the clear daylight? Dream on! If we aren’t in a hurry, I’d take a detour to their ‘divine sect’ and rob them blind, just to show how to actually rob people!” Lynne erupted in torrent of curses, dismissive of the supposed divine sect; after all, he was very possessive of his wealth. Trying to rob him is worse than trying to kill him.

“… I’m actually afraid of entering Ancient City now…” Anna muttered, her entire body shivering.

“What’s there to be afraid of?” Lynne asked calmly. “They are all our benefactors! If I’m honest, I’m looking forward to seeing the again!”

“...”

“If you are suicidal, don’t drag us down with you!” Elynal cursed.

“Suicidal? Bleh, if I wanted to kill myself, I’d do so in the hands of ten thousand mature maidens while swimming down the river of gold, drinking godly wine!”

“….”

“….”

The bird finally landed on the ground as they traveled roughly twenty miles away. The bird immediately fell asleep on Lynne’s shoulder, exhausted beyond belief. However, there was a strange smile atop the bird’s face; it was clearly dreaming about Lynne concocting the pill, and then evolving yet again!

“Yo, Lynne,” the monkey suddenly snickered. “There are a few friends in front of us.”

“Oh?” Lynne arched his brow, while Anna and Elynal became terrified.

“Heh, it’s part of the group from that flame whatever sect we robbed dry,” the monkey continued. “It’s just four people, all of them young, inspecting something that’s giving off pretty decent spacial fluctuations.”

“Ooh?”

“Yo-you… you aren’t thinking of…”

“You-you couldn’t possibly…” Anna and Elynal muttered, dreading Lynne’s next sentence already.

“Is that so? Ha ha,” Lynne suddenly laughed, licking his lips deviously. “It’s only fate to meet friends at such a place. It would be a shame if we didn’t go over and say hello.”

“Hehe,” the monkey laughed as well. “Indeed, true shame.”

“You two,” Lynne then turned towards Anna and Elynal; it was clear these two were at the breaking point. Their skin had probably enraptured already due to Lynne’s… trades… As such, Lynne feared they might screw up his next… trade. “Stay here. I’ll come find you in a few days.”

“….”

“….”

The royal duo said nothing, as they simply plummeted onto the ground, their bodies shaking. They immediately began rummaging through their memories, trying to find a good Spell Art that they could use to change their appearances. Perhaps permanently.

Lynne, on the other hand, appeared completely carefree as he began walking in the direction pointed by the monkey. He didn’t put Phoenix away, as he realized that the little bird could entice even the calmest of old farts, let alone small kids. It was a good bargaining chip, so Lynne naturally brought it with him.

As he neared the group, even he began feeling the spacial fluctuations; while they were among the weaker ones from the cave they left alone, it’s still pretty decent. Hm… how should I swindle these ones. Ah, I’ll think of something once I see them…

“Who goes?!!” a group of six suddenly drew in a crescent arc; Lynne calmly walked out from the bushes, monkey on one and bird on another shoulder.

“Aah, finally I’ve found a living soul,” Lynne shook his head helplessly as he fell onto his knees. “Three years… three years I’ve been suffering here, bound by the curse of that bitch! Ah, brothers, I absolutely adore you!” Lynne immediately began spitting nonsense; all six of the youths wore flame-clad robes, and, more importantly, all were guys. Guys were much easier to trick than girls – at least for Lynne.

“Hm?” one of the youths questioned, still probing this strange guy that came out of nowhere.

“Please, listen to my story,” Lynne said as tears began streaking out of his eyes. “Three years ago, I was a young, excited adventurer, blood of fearlessness burning inside my veins! I departed from my home village, under the watchful eyes of my grandma – who is a Wise Sage that’s lived for five hundred years by the way – in order to experience the world!”

“However, I was not alone,” Lynne suddenly began sobbing like a child as he took both the monkey and the bird, one in each of his hands. “I departed with the loves of my life: Anna and… Nana… the two of them were beautiful, sweet and loving girls that could shake the heavens with their beauty! We merrily traveled, meeting brothers and sisters of all kind on our journey, but, on that fateful day, we met someone devious!”

“She was extremely pretty, and, as you may know, us men have to stick it in where it doesn’t belong, lest we implode!” Lynne’s sobbing turned silent as his expression turned into that of enormous anger. “Her name was… Anan, and that bitch tricked me! Not only did she rob me dry, used me in the most heinous ways, but when I rejected her love, she turned my two most beloved into a monkey and sculpture of ice!”

“How cruel, how detestable, how lamentable my destiny is!” Lynne completely fell onto the floor, face-up, crying like a little child. “For three years, I’ve been stuck here, trying to find my way out, trying to revert my two loves back to who they used to be! It was all in vain! I suffer! Suffer so! Brothers, I plead you to help me! That… Anan bitch told me that the only way to restore my two loves was to use something… what was it? Ah, something called Natural Treasure! I am young, inexperienced; I do not know what that is! You, brothers, look like Wise Sages, just like my grandma! I ask, do you know what this Natural Treasure is?!”

“….” the group was submerged into complete silence; every fiber of their being told them that this story was utter bullshit, yet, every fiber of their being also told them that every word was true. The youth before them looked completely heart stricken, drowned in endless despair.

“You said that the monkey and that bird sculpture were beautiful women? How beautiful?” in the end, one of the youths from the group couldn’t help but ask, gulping lightly. Heh, horny kid…

“Beautiful beyond compare!” Lynne said, flamboyantly flipping his arms about, seeming extremely lamentable. “Their beauties could shake the stars, shiver the oceans, drown the flames! Angel- no, even beyond angelic! Plump, young, fair-skinned, with eyes brighter than stars… and, I haven’t even touched them! I waited, like a true gentleman, for them to grow up! I waited, and I still am...”

“’gulp’,” every single youth suddenly swallowed some saliva as their eyes widened, staring at the monkey and the sculpture. “W-we can help yo-you brother…”

“You can?!” Lynne suddenly bolted onto his feet, his face radiating hope of ages.

“Y-yes, but of course, it won’t be free!” the youth added.

“Of course! I don’t have much – or anything really – but I’ll still do my best to meet your demands!”

“We can g-give you this Natural Treasure,” the youth said. “But you have to trade us that sculpture in return, and never seek her again!”

“What?!” Lynne took a step back, appearing extremely insulted.

“Natural Treasures don’t grow on the trees,” the youth said, sneering slightly. “You have two beauties, so what’s wrong with letting one go to save the other? We’ll even add some other things to help you out in the future. What do you say?”

“This…” Lynne looked extremely troubled, as if he was making a decision he couldn’t possibly make.

“Do it, my love!” the monkey suddenly spoke in the most feminine voice one ever heard; even Lynne was actually surprised for a moment. “Sister… Nana… loves you more than anything! She can’t bear to see you suffer so; she would give up everything – even herself – if you were to leave this damnable place! In the future, you can look for that… Anan… bitch and take revenge for her! These young heroes seem just and heroic and courageous; I’m sure they’ll treat her with utmost care! Right?”

“Right, right, right… definitely!” the youth nodded fervently; damn, if the monkey has such a beautiful voice, I can’t imagine how beautiful the other must be!!

“Ah, may it be so...” Lynne suddenly sighed as he gently picked up the bird and looked at it as if he was looking at his most beloved; he then, reluctantly, handed it over to the group of youths. “That… Anan bitch told me that, aside from this Natural Treasure, she must first be bathed in the blood of a virgin – no older than twenty – as well as some herb called Starlight Domain. Brave heroes, I hope you save her!”

“D-definitely,” as the youth took the sculpture, he handed Lynne a spacial ring; as Lynne inspected it, he nearly burst out in laughter. Damn, idiots! Idiots everywhere! “W-we’ll be on our way, then. Good luck!”

The group of youths disappeared from their sight within an instant. Only then did the monkey and Lynne burst out in laughter. They were practically rolling on the floor. Natural Treasure turned out to be a precious gemstone, and while Lynne couldn’t tell its exact value, it was definitely top-grade. Aside from that, there were several thousands of gold coins, some Rank 5 pills, some books and maps, as well as some weapons.

“Damn, kids really shouldn’t be left alone…” Lynne snickered, looking at the direction the group of youths disappeared towards.

“Heh,” the monkey joined him. “I bet the bird will peck your brains out once it figures what you’ve done.”

“Heh, I’ll compensate for all his suffering. He should return within a few days. Let’s wait here.”

“Hm.”

The duo sat down against the tree, calmly observing the fading sun in the horizon. I wonder… how many new friends will I have by the time I reach the city… hopefully many…