Dungeons are a strange thing, I spent my life studying them in hopes of recreating their unique power over creation, yet whenever I answer a question, I simply gain two more.

1.5 Flip a coin.

I scrolled through the list again, making sure I didn’t miss something.

But nothing changed, this was it, and it was a fucking rip off.

“Hey, menu thingy? Did you make a mistake somewhere?” I asked with barely concealed irritation.

No? I see no problem here.

This asshole. He’s been useless for basically everything I actually needed him for. There should be a limit to how consistently useless you’ve been in a single day, and I think this guy had just broken that limit.

As for why I’m pissed? It’s because half of the stuff I got were repeats.

But how could that be possible you ask? Everything should be its own unique species, right?

Well, you’re partially right, the problem here is what each of us defines as ‘unique’. Apparently, this system sees every slight variation in an organism as it’s whole separate species; I ended up getting repeats just because they had different coloured fur or slightly larger teeth.

This feeling of disappointment can only be equated to getting an Apple phone for Christmas, only to open the box and finding an actual apple in it.

Look on the bright side.

The bright side? At least when Darwin found the same bird but with 8 different beaks, he had the Theory of Evolution to show for it, what did I get? The same bird but with 20 different beaks!

I mean what the fuck is up with that? This random voice in my head is telling me what to do? Am I crazy?

Please calm down.

Like why am I listening to this discount Siri? Why do I have to deal with his shit?

You must calm down.

Like who else fucking wakes up one day and finds themselves as a fucking magic rock and -

CALM DOWN!

Empty.

What was I complaining about? Why was I so angry?

“How did you hear me?

You… were shouting… very loudly…

“Is that so?”

Yes… I’m sorry… but I didn’t expect you to be so… Damaged...

He sounded tired. Why is he tired? Can he get tired?

Eh? This is strange, why are there so many dead things around me? My core room has so many dead birds in it. What is that weird plant over there?

This is difficult… Your soul is too damaged… You must sleep...

Sleep? Why? I am not tired currently, though you sound like you could need some rest.

Shhh... You must sleep...

Why do you sound different?

He didn’t answer, and once again, I felt emptiness.

0-0-0-0-0

He was not supposed to interfere to such an extent, he was simply there to guide. He was merely an automated system after all.

Yet in the moments when the other one came close to berserk when creatures began appearing around the core with such strange mutations, something nudged him. The change was slight, the system barely noticed it himself at the time.

Yet now he stood, within this world of numbers, his power spent, staring at the single line that was changed, and the thing that did it.

“What… are you?” He muttered weakly, he could already feel himself fading.

“Shhh… Don’t worry... neither of us wants a rogue host, do we?”

He gathered what remained of himself, and with some force, he asked: “What are you?”

The thing chuckled, “Merely... a colleague.”

And with that, the Menu slept.

0-0-0-0-0

The plant stared at the dim core.

Usually one would wonder why a plant would stare at something, or perhaps whether or not it can still be considered a plant after developing so far, or how something that didn’t really have a face, or for that matter; eyes, stare at something.

Sentience is a strange thing.

It makes you ponder questions about the most simple concepts.

The plant did not think of itself as ‘it’, it did not think of itself as a singular being, but as an extension of that strange dim rock.

There were other ‘its’ which were part of the core. Most of them lay dead by it’s roots.

‘It’ had killed ‘it’.

The plant shivered, it was not used to such duality, it could only see them as other ‘its’, other parts of itself.

Yet so many of them are dead, which means that it has killed itself multiple times.

The core suddenly flashed, a deep velvet colour soon lit the small room.

The plant perked up, why had it doubted itself? There were other ‘its’ but it was still here.

He was all still here.

The plant turned its attention away from the core and felt a cold wind washing across its branches. It tasted light for the first time.

Defend… Core… Corridor… Outsiders…

The plant practically leapt in joy; such simple concepts! It didn’t even need him to understand. It just had to stop anything from entering the room; his room.

Roots began engulfing the walls of the corridor, thick vines began hanging from every inch of ceiling, it dug deep, taking every sap of nutrient it could find. And where it went, life left.

Grass, hardy in their nature, withered when there was no water. Saplings, young and still growing, fell as their nutrients were taken, their bodies no longer strong enough to support their own weight. Mice ran as it saw the blight overtake the environment.

Something watched the plants progress, it was the core, yet it was also not. It awoke only recently but it was as much the core as the plant was, or the menu, or the broken boy.

Hmm… You sure are working hard...

The plant; intent on fulfilling its duty, did not answer, only when it felt that its roots could no longer grow did it stop. But already the damage was done. Black thorny roots surrounded the dungeon, covering the forest floor and killing all other life.

Overkill… I like you already…

And the plant felt satisfaction.