《WTF I'm a Dungeon!? (Dropped)》Chapter 25 - Have you read the Side Story? *OLD*
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Chapter 25 - Have you read the Side Story?
(Jane's POV) (She's the adventurer from the side story, yes I know that was 15 chapters ago and you skipped the side story but just go back and read it.)
"Fucking jungles."
"Victoria, you're a beastmen and an elf, how can you hate the forest?" Rayes retorted, mostly out of irritation.
"This is a fucking jungle, it's a bit different from a nice cool calm forest, isn't it? In forests it all butterfly's and flowers, here you get 10 centimeter long wasps and poisonous mushrooms!" Victoria replied angrily.
"Fair point, you usually don't have to worry about death by blood loss in a forest," Rayes replied whilst swatting another large insect.
The Hearth Jungles was indeed one of the worst jungles to be in, this jungle was named after a fireplace for a reason after all, though for far less cozy reasons. The humid climate and local wildlife have been slowly chipping at our morale, so we have been making small talk to try to distract us from all of it.
Right now we're in a line formation.
Leading in front is Victoria, she knows this place best and has spent the most time out in nature so it's obvious for her to lead the way.
Behind her is Sophia, who's grumbling whilst walking, sometimes she stops to pick a random plant from the ground. She's the person least used to being out on the field since she usually spends her time concocting potions. She could fly using her broom or use ice magic to cool herself but we have elected for her to save mana after the 'incident' on the 2nd day of this journey. Fucking monkeys.
I'm in the middle, I can move pretty fast so I could easily sprint to assist anyone should the need arises.
After me is Clint, who is carrying Gordon, who fainted a few hours ago due to using all his mana healing us. Fucking monkeys.
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Speaking of Clint, I've been wondering about something for a while now.
"Hey Clint, aren't you hot in all your armor?" I asked.
"No." He replied simply, shutting down any sort of conversation.
Currently there's a betting pool on what is underneath Clint's armor. I have my money on skinny Draconian who lost his horns somehow. It's obvious, think about it, he's never bothered about warm temperatures and if one of his explosives did go off while he was carrying it, his scales would protect him. No sane man would even go near a gnome made toaster much less an explosive. You'd only carry such dangerous things if you were explosion proof. Or at least thought you were.
Bringing up the rear is Rayes, if we were attacked from behind then he'd notice and sound the alarm before the enemy got within 10 meters of us, giving us enough time to prepare and fight. Unless it's a monkey, honestly fuck the monkeys.
"Where the fuck is this dungeon?!" Gordon grunted through episodes of intense headache and fly swatting.
"The Guild Master said it is in the mountains towards the Southwest," I replied.
We've been looking for this dungeon for 5 days now, it should take us another week just to get near those mountains, another to find it. Since we didn't exactly have Semi-God mage to help us look for the exact location.
"That's so far away!? Why are we even looking for a dungeon so far off?" Gordon replied groaning. Mana sickness was hard to deal with, Gordan probably forgot why.
"Because SOMEBODY, had to go gamble off our money and put us in debt to the FUCKING MAFIA!" Victoria suddenly interjected.
"It's not my fault they were better cheaters than me! And if I recall correctly, you were all for me trying to swindle the Mafia!" Rayes retorted.
"There's a Mafia in Falharmus?" Gordon asked, still groggy from mana sickness.
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"THERE'S A MAFIA IN EVERY CITY MUCH LESS COUNTRY!" Victoria and Rayes, in a rare moment, perfectly synced up to shout at Gordan.
They started arguing about something, but I had already tuned it out.
Right now I was looking back on my life choices to see where I screwed up to end up leading a team of people willing to try and swindle the Mafia.
Yup, I can't find it. There's far too many. (Every Millenial Ever) (I wonder if the Mafia boss is a cat?)
(Well you guys aren't crucifying me today)
(Dungeon POV)
(Note to self, decide on a proper name for MC) (And Goblin too, don't forget Goblin) (It's funny how I created funny and compelling characters when I haven't even decided a name for them yet lol)
Things have mostly calmed down after the yesterday's skirmish. Goblin is completely focused on potion brewing, he hasn't rested for the past day and I have already absorbed dozens of failed potions. The herb room was almost half depleted and he just isn't stopping.
The Ants have gotten back up to their old numbers pretty quickly, and are now freely entering the cave to get resources. They have been eating a lot recently, in fact, whenever I come back to them I just see a small pile of leftover corpses made of things that are inedible such as exoskeletons and stuff.
At this point, I have so much random insect corpses that I just dump it all in front of the first room so potential Adventurers could just come and take that stuff off me. I have no problems with mana after all since I regenerate about a thousand every day. Honestly, I have been absorbing so much stuff I'm kinda surprised that the system doesn't dump me another...
--~=~--
For turning yourself into a dumping ground for your minions' garbage, you have obtained the title:
Trash Collection Site
You can now accumulate trash at a faster rate! People will now associate you with trash no matter what happens!
--~=~--
And there it is! Honestly, I wish this system would give me a title with useful effects. The title 'Guy who takes one man's trash another man's treasure way too seriously' is pretty lengthy and is more a description than a title, but it increases the chances of me obtaining good stuff when rifling through other peoples trash, so I guess it's ok.
I suppose it has synergy with this new title, but why the insistence on trash! This stuff could be useful! Haven't you ever seen armor made from an insect raid bosses' exoskeleton! That shit is unbreakable!
And as expected I got no reply. This fucking system better get me something useful or at least, not insulting one of these days. Most of these titles aren't even titles, they sound more like shitty console achievements a person with no life would spend a weekend unlocking.
I have 18 DP currently, I'm gonna save it in case an emergency pops ups, which might happen soon. Honestly, I hope something happens one of these days, being a dungeon is fucking boring. I spend all day stuck inside a confined space with almost no one to talk to. That ant battle was the most fun I had since I was born, I hope some adventurers could drop by and maybe say hi or some sh...
"Hey Plant?" Penny suddenly called me out.
"Yeah what is it?" I asked.
"There's a Silver Ranked Adventurer party that seems to be heading our way, they should arrive in 3 weeks." She replied.
--~=~--
For getting slapped in the face by karma, you have obtained the title:
You Jinxed yourself Bitch
Since you love non-existing stats and useful effects so much let's increase your luck stat by another 300%
--~=~--
Like I said THOSE AREN'T FUCKING TITLES!!
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