I had no idea how long Instinct had been there, and that worried me. Some of the stuff I’d been saying hadn’t been meant for anyone but me and Fail. Not only that, I had flubbed and hit speaker at the end instead of hanging up. Mostly that, actually. That last part had been heard, there was no question.

Fuck, it felt like I was in a shitty soap opera now. That was something that I was not happy about.

My face should be bright fucking red, I could feel it. My only saving grace was my Ghost power obscuring my colour. Yet I was pretty sure that anyone who put a hand to my cheek would swear I had a fever.

Instinct didn’t say anything for a long while. Eventually I gathered myself enough to register that I should follow through on going back to my post. “Excuse me.”

“Of course.” Instinct rattled as she stepped to the side.

I gave her a wide berth regardless. Her voice was really off putting. It was basically the opposite of Orcus’, but had pretty much the same effect. If it wasn’t for the smile and the impish horns, I might have thought Orcus was the one who walked in on me.

After I got out of the shop I breathed a short sigh of relief, but any stress that got washed away came right back as Instinct walked out after me. I didn’t stop for her, but she maintained distance. She still wasn’t saying anything.

I was spooked. I used my power to speed up my walk without changing the speed of my gait, essentially moonwalking forwards. Instinct kept up and didn’t even seem like she was trying. Soon enough, I was back at my post where Sedimentary had thankfully remained untouched. Instinct was still following me.

Picking up Sedimentary for protection was tempting, but I resisted. Instinct was a hero, and I was surrounded by other heroes. She wasn’t about to attack me. Hopefully.

“Why are you following me?” I asked her straight straight. My voice was more flat than I’d been expecting, but not as strong as I’d hoped.

“I am interested in the Sentry.” Instinct said in her unsettling tone. “Most time, we of the Gray Apostles are kept far and away from all Sentrys and Sentinels. It can make for difficult operations, but we manage despite the restriction. Because of this, we don’t have many chances to introduce ourselves.”

I waited for a moment, making sure that was all she had to say. “You haven’t introduced yourself yet.”

“I have not.” Instinct rattled. “First, I am trying to determine an impression of you.” She fell silent again. I glanced around, only to see the Control troopers uncomfortably glancing away whenever I looked in their direction.

Hanging me out to dry?

I homed in on Toil, then glanced back at Instinct who was standing unarmed, with both her gauntleted hands held loosely by her sides. Somehow I felt like I’d have been more comfortable if Instinct had a weapon. Since she wasn’t saying anything, or doing anything to further conversation, I started moving to Toil.

Instinct started moving before I did, which threw me off, but didn’t stop me from moving.

“Toil.” I got his attention. “I have some questions.”

Toil put his hand up and excused himself from a conversation with Risk and Sacred. He had a big gun that looked like it had been ripped out of a sci-fi movie on a strap that looped over one shoulder. Something Unloaded had made, no doubt.

“What is it?” He asked, glancing at Instinct. “Is she troubling you?”

“I am keeping my distance.” Instinct declared.

I glanced over. She was only a short few metres away from me. “Short distance.” I muttered. “They’re questions about earlier today. Probably better asked in private.” I shot a look at Instinct, who did nothing to indicate she understood the implication.

“I don’t think the bunk trucks are being used yet.” Toil said leading the way and gesturing to a large truck that had been parked around the corner, and was only just visible. It was then that I noticed the cordon that Control had made had expanded since I arrived. Now roughly two blocks in every direction were closed off. A significant portion of the space in between was deserted.

Under the street lights, it was like I was walking through a movie. It was a stark contrast to Eden’s stadium, which felt like a movie set.

Instinct, of course, followed us the whole way over to the truck. I didn’t get her deal.

Slingshot drifted closer. I waved up at her and she waved back, then drifted away and vanished above the light. Which was a relief, because I didn’t think I was capable of holding a proper conversation with her right now.

Toil and I got on the bunk truck, which lived up to its name with several bunks in the back of the truck, and Instinct made to get on after us. She was stopped by Toil.

“This is between me and him.” He told her.

“Very well.” She stopped advancing towards us, but stayed in the truck.

“Leave.” Toil growled, irritation at the edges of his voice. Thankfully, Instinct stepped back without turning and left the truck. Toil closed the door after her, then made sure all the windows were closed and the blinds were drawn.

As he did that, I found myself bracing myself on one of the bunks to stand. I was used to having a staff or something to lean on, it felt a little weird.

“Is this about Glitter-” Toil started asking as soon as he was confident things were private.

“It’s not.” I answered before the question was finished. “Not really. I want to know if you know about Forsaken.”

There was a tense pause. “What about Forsaken?” The question was tentative. I was under the impression that Toil knew what I was asking about, but didn’t want to admit it.

I decided to spin a small story to sell what I was asking about. “I went for a pick me up earlier.” Not technically a lie, but the pick me up I was talking about were cookies. “And I did something I’ve never done before. I had tea.”

The way Toil didn’t relax was telling.

I kept going. “I got the boiling water, the teabag, let it strain, and everything. Even knew when to start sipping it. That’s something I’ve never done before.” And I still hadn’t, but it felt like the right thing to say. This tale might not be as tall as I thought it’d be. “So I started thinking about it, how I might be different in any ways, and a whole bunch of dominoes fell into place. So here’s my question.” I took a breath. “Can you help me?”

Toil let out a deep sigh. “Yes, but not now. What else have you noticed?”

“I think it’s more what have you noticed.” I said. “Remember how Gli- Fairy was talking about me?” Calling me a detective. “Why didn’t you take it back when I offered it?”

Toil sighed after some consideration. “If I’m going to be honest, I thought you had more time.”

“Excuse me?”

“It’s personality bleed-” He started to explain.

“I got that. Are you telling me that you knew?”

“I did.”

The image of Toil with his hand half covering his face in the hospital sprung to mind. That hadn’t just been because of the situation with Glitter Bomb and Forsaken spiraling out of control. He knew, and I had been holding Sedimentary at the time.

“Tell me everything.” I demanded. The way I said it wasn’t eager. Just the opposite, actually. But I needed to know. My fingers were white where I was holding the bunk, and I was doing my best Orcus impression for my voice.

“The… people Forsaken puts into his weapons... As you have likely figured, they are all transhuman. One of the many facets of his power means that the containment of those people isn’t permanent. In fact, it degrades after only a few hours, and whatever is kept inside starts to escape. That’s why Forsaken has that bag. It’s another transhuman, Gorger, I think his name was. He had a pocket dimension that he could put things in by eating them. It’s easier for him to maintain one of his creations instead of all of them, and then touch them up whenever they’re brought out.”

Toil looked at his hands for a moment, then dropped them and looked at me square on. “Forsaken can put everything back where it’s meant to be, but with things as they are right now, there are two problems with that.”

“Forsaken is in hospital right now.” I deadpanned.

“And after enough time has passed, Forsaken becomes unable to dislodge all of the bleed.” Toil finished.

It didn’t hit me as hard as Collage’s pink beam did, but it was close.

“Last I heard, Forsaken was going in for surgery.” Toil continued. “He was lucky, the spike didn’t pierce any of his vitals, but it did scratch his lung and intestine. If what the doctors told me holds true and there are no complications, he’ll be out of surgery by hour ten.”

“That doesn’t mean he’ll be able to fix me.” I said. He’d be unconscious for who knows how long after that.

“No.” Toil agreed. “It doesn’t.”

I took that in. Then I had to ask, “Is that why Fairy isn’t allowed to touch people?”

Toil hesitated. Then, “Just a foreword, this is a guess. Forsaken’s power works by breaking down whatever it is that keeps ourselves in ourselves. I don’t know if that’s proof of us having a soul, and I hope it isn’t because his power doesn’t work on people without powers, but once that barrier is broken, it doesn’t go back up. Not all the way. The Regulation thinks that yes, Fairy has that same quality, but we haven’t tested it to find out.”

I nodded. I was more on my feet now. My grip on the bunk wasn’t necessary.

“I suppose if we get a more childlike Forsaken, we’ll be able to tell for sure.” Toil thought aloud. He looked back to me. “Lock, you have my sincerest apologies. We should have told you long before it got this far.”

“It’s not fine, but I understand.” I said shortly. “You can’t exactly advertise this stuff.”

“No.” Toil agreed. “And that doesn’t excuse the fact that Forsaken and I put you in serious psychological danger. And it doesn’t change the fact that what I’m about to suggest is unforgivable...”

He was quiet for too long.

“Well?” I prompted.

“Keep using the spear.” Toil said. “You’ll have more range with it in your hands, which I know is something you struggle with. And if you can figure Sedimentary out, you can pull of some impressive maneuvers. I knew the man while he was still alive and in his prime, and he was a force to be reckoned with. Control was never able to get over the fact that he’d rather be a detective than a monster slayer, but he did participate in a few of these things. Two of the seventeen deathless incidents were because of him.”

I thought on it. “More of me is going to get overwritten.” I said simply.

“So limit the time you hold onto him. Don’t pick him up until you have to. In the meantime, I think I should tell Common Sense about you and the spear. He’ll probably recognise the power, and we shouldn’t blindside him with it.”

“Yeah.” I nodded. “Go do that.”

Toil moved to leave. He glanced back at the door when I didn’t move. “Are you coming?”

“I think I’m going to get some rest.” I lied. “Got some things to think about.”

Toil gave me a long look, then nodded and made to leave. The door opened before Toil could get a hand on the handle. Instinct was on the other side.

“Leave him alone.” Toil growled at Instinct.

Instinct’s response rumbled more than Instinct’s warning, and she wasn’t even trying. “If he asks me to, I will.”

Toil looked at me. I waved a hand, a horizontal movement with my palm facing down in an attempt to say it was fine, and he left. He didn’t look all that happy with it. Instinct stepped up into the truck with a grace I hadn’t recognised until now. She approached, and I mentally made sure that the colours on my face were what I intended them to be.

Instinct stopped in front of me and very obviously sized me up. “You just had emotional release.”

“Catharsis, you mean?” I almost scoffed. “Yeah, no.”

“I did not say it was positive.” Instinct rattled, then put a clenched hand to her chest with a light clang. “I am Instinct, the figurehead of the Gray Apostles. It is a pleasure to make your acquaintance.”

“Lock.” I supplied my own name. “But you already knew that, probably.”

“I did.”

I couldn’t tell if she was a worse or better conversationalist than Orcus. With the quirks that each of them had, it was hard to measure them against each other. “How did your impression of me turn out?”

“Less than flattering. I was not intending to mention it.”

“Uh huh.”

“What is it you intend to do?” Instinct asked, changing tact as if I hadn’t spoken.

I frowned, not that she could see it. “As in right now, or when the monster gets here?”

“In general. I want to know how you measure against my impression.”

That wasn’t very helpful for narrowing it down, and I didn’t want to broadcast my every action. Not when I had a conspiracy against me to worry about, and not to someone being this actively creepy.

I ended up saying, “What you heard earlier, I’m not going to act on that.”

Instinct nodded slowly. She clearly didn’t believe me.

“Is that all? Can you go now?”

“I can, but I do not think I should.”

“Why?”

Instinct lowered her head, bringing the cracked featureless smile down and closer to my own. “You intend to do far more than fail to act on something.”

She sounded too sure. I crossed my arms. “Is a power whispering that in your ear?”

Instinct didn’t move, but she made this… sound. “No, not in my ears.”

I realised what was going on. “You know, I’m getting tired of Smart powers nosing in where they aren’t welcome. Tell me whatever it is you know that others wouldn’t, so I can address it and get on with this situation.” I gestured towards ground zero.

“You do not intend to assist in this situation at this time.” Instinct said correctly. I started to leave, but she placed an open palm against my solar plexus in a single fluid motion. From the contact with my shirt, I could tell she was exerting more force than she should have from that position. She was an Enforcer as well as a Psychic?

“That is simply what my power informs me of.” Instinct continued once she had me stopped.

I considered that. “What are you going to do about it?”

“Inquire.” Instinct rattled out. That was all she said to answer.

“I’m going to rearm.” I told her, then walked forwards again, using my power to equally oppose any force she put on my shirt. Instinct’s boots screeched on the floor as the motion made her rotate in the space.

It was the first thing that I’d seen perplex the Gray Apostle, and I used that to escape the Bunk Truck. I speed walked away from the whole mess that the A-13 was causing and pulled out my Vphone. Orcus wasn’t there, and I wasn’t about to contact Zephyr, so I sent Voidling a message saying I was going to the SRT to pick up my proper costume and weapon. I didn’t wait for a reply, I just set the phone on silent and put it in my pocket, then focused on walking faster than most sprinters could run.

“Hey.” Slingshot said from off to my right.

“Fuck!” My concentration lapsed and I tripped on nothing. All it was was a foot coming down with not quite the right amount of force behind it, but it put me off balance. I had to use my power on my clothes to slow down before I hit the ground, which I only accomplished through reflex. All the seams strained against my body, and I heard stitches breaking.

It was a fast decceleration, but it was better than skinning myself at the speed I’d been going at. Even still I got skuffed as I put one shoulder forward and rolled on that before springing up off the ground again thanks to the sheer amount of speed I had behind me. I landed the second time far less gracefully, but it wasn’t as bad as it could have been.

I lay face up for a few seconds, regretting the wedgie my power gave me whenever I did that. A concerned Slingshot drifted into view.

“Um, sorry.” She apologised.

The false infatuation I’d worked so hard to quench was running rampant. I didn’t trust myself to speak.

“Are you okay?” She asked, leaning forward in that way she always did when she was concerned.

I looked away with my eyes and started picking myself up, wincing at all the new aches. “I’m fine, I think.” My power supplied me with a mental image of myself, and nothing seemed to be out of place. My voice, on the other hand… I wasn’t sure if it was me imagining things, but I sounded more strangled than I normally did. That in itself was an enigma. Was it because of the fall, or because Slingshot was right there? I couldn’t tell.

Fuck Fail. I didn’t need this right now.

“Maybe be more careful in the future.” I said, facing but not looking at Slingshot. “Bad things would have happened if I’d been going faster.”

“Yip, yip.” Slingshot agreed, almost sounding like a dog. Damn it, that wasn’t an image I wanted.

I carefully placed my eyeline to be looking past Slingshot. “So why are you following me?”

“Well, you moving around a lot, and everyone had the grimmest expressions on. Then you started going away. I checked with Zephyr, and I got permission to make sure you were okay.” Slingshot paused, and I used that time to process. I needed that time, my brain was running hot. Wait, Zephyr let Slingshot check on me? “Are you okay?”

Uuh… Could be worse. I thought. This was going to be rough. I was dealing with two different trains of thought at once. But that’s not saying much because right now I’m panicking as much as I was in Salt Lake City. “Dealing.” I lied.

“Are you sure?” Slingshot pressed, and my defences crumbled.

I didn’t say anything. I just sighed and started walking again. Slingshot was able to easily keep pace, even as I started sliding at the speed I’d been going before. I let myself glance over. She was flying sideways, completely unconcerned about the speed we were moving, and was mostly looking at me.

I turned my eyes ahead and focused on navigating the streets. It was balls o’clock in the morning now, and there were only a few cars on the road. But that was enough that I had to watch out, now that we were out of Control’s cordon. I noted distant music playing a tune I recognised, but I couldn’t place it.

Just distractions. Slingshot flying alongside me was supposed to be my focus right now.

“Three- four things are bothering me.” I said. “Take your pick and I’ll tell you about it.”

“Um, all of them?” Slingshot asked.

I huffed, then ticked off the things on my fingers as I mentioned them. “A murderer, my sanity, the Theta class situation I just walked away from, and…” You. I thought, but I couldn’t say that. “Me.” It was close enough.

“You said yourself twice.” Slingshot pointed out.

I had. It took me a moment to recognise that fact.

“Is that why you corrected from three to four?”

I shrugged a shoulder and nodded.

“So what’s that about?”

“Pointless drama.” I answered.

“Ah.” Slingshot shrank away a little. It hurt to see, and was worse to notice.

“You got hit by Collage’s beam right?” I blurted suddenly. “I remember you saying that at some point.”

“Um…” Slingshot came back down a little. “Yeah…”

“Which one? Was it pink?” I had no idea why I had started down this thread of conversation, but I wasn’t about to abort now. The rails of my mind had been worn down by days of sleeplessness and now all this.

Better to do a callosal fuck up now than when I was in the state of mind to cringe at every word.

“Yeah…” Slingshot said.

“Did you meet anyone new when it was still affecting you?”

“No. Why?”

“Because that’s a first impression, and first impressions stick. Maybe more than they should in this case.” Just like that, the cat was out of the bag. I didn’t watch Slingshot’s face for a reaction, but I could see her body in my peripheral, and that was enough with how expressively she floated around.

I saw her taking the information in. I saw the moment of realisation. I saw a second moment of realisation. I saw her gear up to say something and think better of it.

“It’s been eating at me for a while, and right now I’m worn down enough not to care.” I spoke before she could. With the cat now out of the bag, I might as well get its litter out too. “For the record, I’ve been trying to act as though there wasn’t anything supernatural between us. Trying to figure you out as I would have without that effect.”

“I-” Slingshot halted verbally. “Should we be talking about this at this speed?”

“I think I’d shut up if I slowed down.” It wasn’t a lie. That part of me was focusing on managing the friction in my boots was distracting from the part of me that was repeating ‘oh fuck oh fuck oh fuck.’

“Well, I… Is that why you’ve been sticking close to me?”

I wasn’t sure how to answer that, but I tried. “You weren’t the only one I got a false first impression on.”

“Who else?” Slingshot asked. I saw another moment of realisation. “Lucidity!”

“No.” I cut in quickly. “I met Lucidity before the beam. I’m not- no.” I shook my head. “Just no.”

“Then who, Michael?”

I looked around quickly before turning back to the hysterical Slingshot. “Name!” I hissed. Slingshot recoiled as she realised what she’d done. “It was Unshaken.”

Slingshot tensed, rotated sideways a bit, then looked at me in alarm. All while travelling alongside me at a rapid speed. “What’s- What is it like?”

“It’s like being in love, I expect.” Then I shrugged. “But I don’t really know because I haven’t been in love, like- that. Being around one of, uh, them is a rush that’s difficult to put words to.” I glanced at Slingshot, trying to get a read on how she was taking this, but she was impassive for the first time a while. “Whenever I get attention, it’s like I’m on top of the world. Whenever I get scolded, it cuts deep. Like I’m a fucking dog or something.”

“Do you hate it?”

I took a deep breath and navigated around a pothole. “The idea of this? Yeah. Fuck Collage for hazing me like that. You’re lucky you didn’t meet anyone new when he did it to you.”

“Thats…”

“As for the love itself, I can’t like it because it’s not me.” I floundered, trying to find good words to say next. “But... I think I’m past hating it.”

“What does that mean?” Slingshot wasn’t drifting sideways quizzically, I noticed. She was curling up on herself little by little instead. Had Fail told the truth? Why was he turning a power that could be used to unravel the secrets of reality towards the purposes of teen drama?

“Time heals all wounds, or something like that.” I decided. “Actually, you know where I’m from. I can be candid. It’s more that I have deeper wounds than being forced to like a girl I spend a lot of time around.”

Slingshot wasn’t curling up any more, but she wasn’t reversing it. Had I said the right thing? What even was the right thing? What did I want out of this? Rationally, all I wanted was a relationship where we could be heroes together and that was kind of it. Irrationally, I wanted so much more.

Which goal was I heading towards? Was the bleed from Sedimentary influencing that decision? This was the absolute worst time for this to come out. Slingshot was still curled up and we were about to go around a corner.

“Next right.” I said, bringing her out of it.

She looked around and realised what I meant. “Oh, right. Yes.” She pulled away so I would have the space to turn. While she could turn on a dime, I was stuck slowly redirecting the force with which I was moving. Soon enough we were back to me walking awkwardly beside her as she floated.

“The longer this goes, the more awkward it’s going to get.” I realised. “Um. I love you. Not much can change that. All I really want after this talk is to keep being able to be- no, work with you. Have things not be awkward.”

“I’d like that too.” Slingshot agreed, but it sounded like her mind was somewhere else.

So much for things not being awkward.

“For what it’s worth I have trouble dealing with Unshaken as well, and from my warped perspective my judgement of her character is much less flattering than my judgment of yours. I can’t- nope.”

Slingshot waited a second, but I was not about to keep talking under the influence. “What were you going to say?“

And just like that my defences crumbled again. “I was going to talk about whether or not I might have ended up liking you anyway, but I realised it was pointless. This isn’t schrodinger's cat, we know for certain that I… I don’t like saying it out loud. You know what I mean.”

“That…” Slingshot paused and made sure her midair posture was proper. “It’s a lot to take in, that you have those feelings.”

“Should I give you some space?” I asked, possibly too abruptly. I slowed down as I said that, we were right outside the SRT. “We’re here, and I planned to shower and change costume, then go back to the Theta site. You probably don’t want to follow me into the shower, considering everything we just talked about. Changing rooms, I can’t say. Or you could just head on back without me. Between your flight and how fast I can move on the clear roads, it’s safe, and you could take the time to sort that out.”

Slingshot seemed overwhelmed, she was leaning back a little in space. That had definitely been too much. Everything that had happened had taken my filter off, or it was Sedimentary butting in again?

“Know what? I’m just going to go inside before I say anything more embarrassing.” True to my word I started moving inside.

“M- Lock.” Slingshot said. I turned around and looked past her. “Um, are you looking at me?”

I flicked my eyes to look at her aviators. “Yes.”

“I- It- This is what my dad was worried about, with showing my face.” She was wringing her hands and subconsciously rotating so her head was closer to the ground. “It’s almost like a… a really bad…” She floundered for the right word.

“Movie?” I offered.

“Sure.” More wringing of the hands. “Because…” She floundered again.

I had an inkling of what was going on there, thanks to Fail’s unwanted assistance. Still, I wasn’t about to put those words in her mouth, partly because she could be working up to letting me down instead. Eventually I pointed my thumb over my shoulder.

“Should I let you sort that out and find the words?” I asked. Slingshot nodded earnestly. My lips pulled tight and I turned to go inside. This time Slingshot didn’t stop me.

I needed a distraction to wind down from all that, so I went straight to the shower and got inside with my clothes still on. After spending several seconds enjoying the feeling of warm water hitting my head with my eyes closed, I noticed there wasn’t any sound. Muffle was in the shower room as well, I just hadn’t noticed.

It wasn’t like that changed anything, seeing as we had stalls. Still, I would’ve liked the audio stimulation. As it stood, the silence just let my mind replay the words of Slingshot over and over. I tried to think about something else and ended up thinking about the scene I walked in on with Forsaken, how weak Nancy and Joe had been. I hadn’t received any word on how they were doing, and I probably wouldn’t.

The distraction didn’t last. The memory connected me to think about my interactions with Forsaken. Then I thought about Fairy and how her personality was probably bleeding into others with her every touch. Then I thought about how Sedimentary had bled into me. Then I thought about how he might be altering my behaviour, which lead to me thinking about the conversation that I just had with Slingshot, and the cycle started over again.

It was easier to manage under the shower, so I put off getting out of it, or even changing clothes. The water was like a masseuse massaging away a headache that I hadn’t even known was there. I found myself leaning against the wall and ever so slowly sliding down into a sitting position. I hung my head forward to catch the falling water when I realised I didn’t want to move.

I realised too late that I was falling asleep again.