《Duality》3. I/Me 9
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I turned to Elsbeth. “It’s rude to point.” I told her.
“But. But he…” Elsbeth protested.
I pinched the bridge of my nose. “I’ll put it this way, El. I’ve had a lot on my mind recently and I’m not thinking straight. I just want some food. I haven’t eaten since Pete’s yesterday.” I was still tired too, can’t forget that. The phantom weight behind my eyes wouldn’t let me.
“I’m going to ask him his name.” Elsbeth decided, then turned to me. “And don’t call me El.” She hopped off her seat and walked right up to my brown haired doppelganger.
I leaned on the table with my head down and focused on the table. It was a table, which wasn’t news to me. But I was very intimate with this table now. It let me distract myself.
“Aah!” Elsbeth yelled. I looked up to see her rapidly looking between me and the doppelganger.
She pointed at him. “Michael.” Then she pointed at me. “Michael.” Then she pointed back and forth again. There was a sense of wonderment on her scarred face, which I was still getting used to. The wonderment was matched by confusion, which I also happened to be feeling. The chances of someone looking like you and having the same name as well was pretty low.
“Uh…” The other Michael turned to the cashier. “I’ll take pancakes.”
No way. I thought. Elsbeth was similarly bewildered.
She turned to me. “I don’t know what to do!”
“Come back here and sit down.” I said, if only to give direction. I was distracted, anyway, giving Michael my full attention and barely noticed Elsbeth taking my advice.
The other Michael finished paying and approached us. “So you’re a Michael, eh?” He asked.
Canadian. I immediately thought.
Elsbeth spluttered. “You’re kidding!”
“That’s me.” I answered, ignoring her. “I take it you’re a Michael as well.”
“Hehe.” He gave an easy laugh. “That’s right. I wasn’t expecting to run into a…clone of mine… today.” He winced and I felt the same. “But if you have the same name as me, then that just makes this all the more rare. May I sit here?”
“He has to.” Elsbeth told me.
I waved a hand as I sat back in my chair. “Go ahead.”
Michael looked around. “I’ll be right back.” He left to pick up a chair from a nearby table.
Elsbeth was suddenly in my face, leaning across the table. “He even walks like you.” She whispered loudly.
“What?” I pushed her back by the shoulder. Her appearing in my face like that reminded me of the previous night. I decided I didn’t want her to explain why she paid attention to how people walked and changed the subject. “Do we sound different?”
“A little.” Elsbeth said after a moment’s thought. “You’re more… uh… here.”
Because I spent so much time in the states, while this Michael had likely just come from Canada. That put another point in the similarity column. Michael quickly returned with a chair and sat. The table was quiet for a few moments.
“What are your last names?” Elsbeth asked, breaking the silence before things could get awkward. “I’m sorry, I just can’t keep thinking of both of you as Michael.”
“Michael Barker.” I informed her.
The other Michael snapped his attention to me. I met it curiously as a smile spread across his face. Was that what it looked like when I smiled? It was off putting. He had a very similar face to mine, and the upturned nose put a strange spin on his grin. His hair was longer, and brown to boot, but it stuck up in the same way mine did. The smile was non-threatening, but there was a delicate intent hidden in there.
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“Michael Oliver Barker.” He said.
I paled. Literally feeling the blood drain from my face.
“No way!” Lucidity exclaimed. She turned to me. “Michael, Michael- not you- Michael, what’s your middle name.”
“Oliver.” I replied on autopilot, not taking my eyes off of Michael Oliver Barker.
“Now that’s uncanny.” He laughed.
I agreed, but felt drastically different about it.
Who was this guy? Why did we have so many similarities? The name and appearance could be chalked down to chance. But the same first, middle, and last names? Statistical improbability. I refused to believe that he had simply walked into the same cafe as me and ordered the same goddamn thing as me. There was something else at play and I needed more information.
“Do you mind if we do a speed round?” I asked, feigning enthusiasm. Elsbeth was going through a very long ‘woah’ moment.
“I sure don’t mind.” He responded, sounding incredibly canadian. “I was thinking the same thing.”
“Uh… You first.” I had proposed the idea, but didn’t actually have any questions raring to go. I was off balance again. Maybe the mind games from yesterday had burnt me out.
“When were you born?” He started.
“January twenty-second, two thousand and three.” I answered.
From his expression I knew the answer before he said it. “Well, wouldn’t you know. Twenty-second of January in the year two thousand and three.”
“Place of birth?” I asked.
“Vancouver general hospital? You?”
“Vancouver, but I don’t know which hospital.”
“What!?” Elsbeth exclaimed.
Michael gave Lucidity a playful look then returned to the game. “Interests?”
“Film.” I answered, causing his eyebrows to go up in surprise.
“Really?” He asked, then repeated. “Really.” He sounded quite sure despite the fact that I hadn’t said anything. He must have read it from my expression. His face had been an open book so far, and since we were apparently so similar, mine was as well. From his reaction I gathered that this was the first divergence.
“And yours.” I prompted.
“The internet.” He responded. “I moderate sometimes.”
I tucked that information away, then decided to ask another question that was going to be another point of divergence. “Best friend?”
“Jackson.” He said.
I fell backwards in my chair. If it caught attention, that attention was stolen by three servings of pancakes and my hot cocoa being delivered to the table. I focused on my jewelry while I stared at nothing and tried to build up a facade to use again.
His best friend is Jackson. The thought came unbidden and my progress was destroyed.
“I knew a Jackson.” I murmured.
“What was that?” Elsbeth asked.
Suddenly I had a facade again. “Elsbeth.” I said, gesturing at her. “Best friend.”
“Oh.” Michael glanced at her. She gave a thumbs up while holding a fork and grinned messily with pancake in her mouth. “You’re sure about that.” He said. I shrugged. “Parents?”
“Sofie, Neville, Emma, Mark, and Kathrine.” I recited, then paused for effect and took a moment to take a sip of the cocoa. “I’ve made the rounds.”
“Gabriel, Andrea, and Laura.” Elsbeth crowed. “You’re not the only one!”
“What are we, comparing dead parents?” I asked.
“I’ve got one hundred percent” Elsbeth claimed macabrely. “Bet you can’t match that.”
“Uh. Definitely not.” I conceded, then glanced to my side at Michael, who was looking at me with a strange expression. I’d seen it in the mirror after leaving the sunlit city. “Stop. I’ve heard it before. Move on.”
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“Uh... Sorry, okay.” He seemed to have trouble finding the words. “I just wasn’t expecting… You… Um. Neville and Sofie.”
That was it.
I grabbed his collar and yanked him towards me. My body was shorter than average, and much lighter than average. This Michael had a similar body to mine, and appeared to have the same issue with putting on mass, be it muscle or fat. But I had been spending the past two weeks going to the gym daily, and been getting my ass handed to me for the majority of that time. It wasn’t showing in how I looked, but definitely in what I could do. If only a little.
Michael wasn’t expecting me to move so aggressively and was weaker than me. I pulled him into my face before he could even try to resist and when he struggled, I didn’t let him move. I was stronger than him and had my power if I needed it.
I stood, dragging Michael up with me. “We’re having a talk.” I declared for Elsbeth’s benefit. “Alone.”
Elsbeth had been taken off guard by my sudden aggression and dropped a forkload of pancake. There was a sudden quiet in the cafe as all the other customers turned to look at us. I released Michael.
“After you.” I told him.
“Sorry. Guys talk.” He told the room to assuage them as he started walking. His confident smile was back in an attempt to diffuse the tension in the room. “There’s a girl involved.”
I turned to Elsbeth before leaving. I leaned close and whispered, “You can listen, but please do it from here.” Then I turned and left without looking to see how Elsbeth responded.
This Michael was setting off alarm bells that I was getting tired of hearing. He had a certainty about the truth that was uncanny, and the fact that we had the same parents wasn’t something I could ignore. The fact that they were my birth parents simply made that something I had to act on now.
Michael found a park bench and sat on it. I didn’t.
He sized me up. “You’re an enigma.” He said. A lot of the friendliness had been stripped away from his speech. If it had been like looking in a mirror before, this was like talking to a clone of me.
“Uh huh.” I responded, sounding unimpressed despite the fact that I felt the same.
“Fascinating. Who are you?” He was acting differently now. Like a scientist in a movie that had just uncovered a new MacGuffin element. Actually, make that an AI simulating a ‘what if?’ scenario based on myself.
“Michael Barker, didn’t you know?” I asked sarcastically. “Oh wait, you’re me.”
He cocked his head in confusion. It wasn’t just confusion though, it was like he had accepted what I said as true and was trying to figure out the ramifications.
“But that’s not possible.” He said, then winced. “That’s also true. Damnit.”
“Are you a transhuman?” I asked him straight.
He nodded. “Same as you.” Then frowned. “Now why is that…” He trailed off.
“You’re Smart.” I said, earning a snap of his fingers and a finger gun pointed at me. I crossed my arms, unamused.
“That’s me, a Smart Psychic. Tremble before me!”
“I’m usually a fan of the dramatic, but you’ve caught me at the tail end of a long series of busy and bullshit days. You’re a Smart Psychic, you have the same face as me, and a similar history. Why are you here?”
“The same reason you’re asking all these questions. Now that we have privacy, or, at least, the illusion of privacy...” He trailed off again and glanced back to the cafe.
“Elsbeth is listening in, just in case you try strongarming me.” I told him.
“You can say that.” He shook his head. “She was going to anyway? She was going to anyway. Heh. That’s Lucidity for you. Hello Lucidity.” He waved towards the cafe.
“Keep listening, Elsbeth.” I spoke to the air. “I need someone to tell Sofiya what happened to me if I end up not being able to go home.”
“Ah, whatever.” Michael shrugged. “I’ve tilted my hand even showing up here. Call me Fail. I know many, many things.”
“Such as?” I tested.
“Lock.” Fail said simply. It was getting confusing referring to him by my name, even if it was technically correct. His use of my name made me tense briefly. “My power lets me expand my knowledge pool in ways that you are free to guess at. I will concede the fact that the things I know are based on other things that I already know, and that I can quickly make connections between things. Thing is, I have to know it.”
“You know what you already know?” I asked, eliciting a nod. “That seems like a dumb power.”
“Actually, it’s quite useful. But you’re wrong about one thing, I don’t have internal omniscience, no matter how much I wish I did. I just recall the things I know as they become relevant.” He clapped his hands together. “So, say I’m having a gay old time with my mom when the news comes on and reports on the new Graceland heroes Madeleine Soyer and Michael Barker.” He leaned towards me. “I didn’t know that information.”
That was interesting, and I had several questions. But he hadn’t finished telling his side of the story. “Why did you contact me then?” I asked.
“Curiosity.” He answered simply. “I started testing information in Graceland and found that I seemed to have a lot of local knowledge without ever actually having been there. I could say random words and get the hero names of everyone in the city, even the villains. Even Greenflame.”
“But you couldn’t get any answers about me, or how I have the exact same name and history as you, up to a point.” I guessed.
“Ding ding.” He snapped and pointed a finger gun at me again. “You win one question. But seriously, what even the fuck? My power considers us the same person, except it doesn’t, which is pinging at me that the information itself is a falsehood.” He threw up his arms. “It’s a cyclical rabbit hole, and I want answers.”
“We’re not the same person.” I said. “The fact that we’re here, talking, should be proof of that.”
“See, now you’re about to see a magician at work. That statement ‘we’re not the same person’ is false. Because we are both Michael Oliver Barker. Friendly MOBs, if you will.” I snorted, unamused. “The fact that we’re here and talking is proof that we’re different people, but we are not different people. That’s what my power is telling me. Maybe we’re different versions of the same person? Except that’s a half truth as well. Something happened to make us split. I just don’t know what.”
I started digesting that. “Do you have blind spots?”
“Everything I don’t know.” He shrugged. “Think of it like a dagger ability. I’m sure you can make the connection.”
I could. “You can only access information you’ve touched. Which is just a drop in the bathtub when you look at the grand scheme of things.”
He nodded. “Yes, but you’ve seen your bathtub, haven’t you?”
“I wouldn’t call it seeing.”
Realisation flashed across Fail’s face. “So that’s why… Anyway, do you want to continue the speed round?”
“No.” I said forcefully. “I know where the point of divergence likely is. It’s when I was six. Is that what you came here for?”
Fail thought for a bit. “That’s not wrong. Do continue.”
I started to say something but it died in my throat. “Not now, and not here.”
“Aw, why not?”
“Because it’s heavy shit that I ignore and lock in a box.” I told him, earning a single laugh from him. “And we have different powers. The chances of someone with powers knowing another person manifesting powers is astronomically low, yet here we are. So I want to know about that too.”
“Trade origin stories?” Fail offered. “You’ll have a tough time beating mine… Motherfucker, that’s rough.”
I blinked. “That’s a tall order.”
Fail sighed. “Lock, I’m going to find out one way or another. All I’m doing here is offering to get dirty with you, so you feel a bit safer, and maybe don’t come tracking me down with vengeance. This is the best option for the both of us.”
I thought on that wordlessly. As much as I hated to admit it, he was right. He had a power that told him things that I was having a hard time finding the pattern behind, beyond the whole sharing information part. The fact that the information flowed towards him wasn’t something I liked, either. Taking his deal was the only way I would know as much as him. “Fine. But not here.”
“Then where?”
I blanked. After a moment I turned to the cafe. “Elsbeth, do you want to listen to this?”
There wasn’t an immediate response. There were sudden vibrations coming from ground to my side. I turned to see Elsbeth standing there with a concerned expression covering her eyes, the one milky eye standing out amongst her features. She had an ear pod in and a device that looked like a Vphone, but it wasn’t a model I’d seen before.
“Lock, I-” She started. “Are you going to… You know.”
“Before I answer that, can you do me a favour and make a villain detector?” I asked quietly, pulling Elsbeth slightly so we were talking away from Fail.
She crouched and reached through the ground. I crouched with her and soon she retracted her hand with a familiar device in hand.
“It’s powered by friendship.” Elsbeth proudly whispered to me as she handed it over.
I smiled thanks as I hit the not so surreptitiously named “ON” button. It blinked on with one red dot nearby, but it wasn’t in the direction of the other Michael.
“There’s a villain!” Elsbeth hissed at me. “I have to take get reinforcements.”
“Hold on.” I latched on to Elsbeth’s arm before she could get diving. “Thank’s, El. I just wanted to make sure that he didn’t trigger the villain detector. I think that villain is how he got here. Just a mercenary.”
Elsbeth gave me a questioning look.
“Think about it, he said he hadn’t visited Graceland before and he’s still sixteen. If I’m right, he still lives in Vancouver with his mom and dad. This is a day trip for him, it makes sense that he’d bring along a Displacer to help him move around.”
“I suppose...” She didn’t sound entirely sure.
“Besides, what wants me to talk about…” I shoved the sunlit city away from the forefront of my mind. “I’m going to need… help.”
“I can do that.” Elsbeth told me without hesitation, which threw me.
She was the reason I joined the heroes in the first place. Here she was again reminding me of qualities I wished I had. There was no way I would offer anyone that kind of assistance without at least thinking about it.
I stood and turned to Fail. “Elsbeth’s a local, she should know somewhere a little more private.”
He rose to his feet. “While that’s fair, that wasn’t the deal. I’m trading origin stories with you, not the foundling hero. It is bold of you to assume I’m going to cooperate with her present.”
“It’s very likely I won’t be able to tell my story if it’s just you.” I stated flatly. “You can consider this a package deal.”
Fail looked at us, sizing me up. I had a stronger stance on the issue than he did, and I made that plain to see. He sighed. “I stood because I was feeling a little sorry for you, doing all the standing and all that. Where are we going?”
I looked at Elsbeth. “Do you know a good spot?”
“I do.” Elsbeth told us brightly, then she grabbed my hand and led the way.
~~~
We ended up near the lakeside. I could hear the lapping of water against the shore from where we were, and there was only the occasional sound of an interrupting motor. If this had been the weekend, it would have been packed by people doing shopping, if the line of shops within eyesight were any indication. But right now it was nearly deserted.
The three of us were sitting at a table that was a permanent fixture of the lakeside. Fail was sitting by himself on one side, and was looking over our shoulders at the scenery behind where Elsbeth and I were sitting.
“Who first?” I asked.
“I vote Michael.” Fail said, raising his hand.
“Cool.” I said. “Which one?”
He shrugged. “Flip on it? Dibs heads, by the way. It only makes sense.”
I rolled my eyes and started fishing out my wallet only to find Elsbeth shoving a coin in my face.
“Thanks.” I took the coin and flipped it, and immediately regretted touching something Elsbeth gave me. It did the weird thing where it bastardised Newton’s laws again. Just flipping the coin gave me vertigo, so I let it fall on the table and naturally come to a rest. It landed on ‘dumb heads’.
“I take offence to that.” Fail told Elsbeth, who just giggled innocently. Or unrepentantly. “So, where to begin?”
I picked up the coin and looked at the bottom side, seeing another ‘dumb heads’ on the other side. It evaporated from my fingers as I took that in. I looked at Elsbeth, who was still giggling.
Then I looked back to Fail. “Manifesting?” I suggested.
“Nah, that’s jumping straight to dessert.” He frowned. “Guess the beginning’s the only place to start. Ha ha, I know that’s not right. Oh, fuck you.”
“Michael.” I said to pull his attention away from his power.
“Sorry.” He smiled sheepishly. “I’m not normally around crowds of gifted. Hush. It never does. Anyway, the start. We’ve kind of covered it already. Two two Jan, two zero zero three, Vancouver General Hospital. Mom is called Sofie, Dad was Neville. Was. He got killed by Floorhog in twenty-ten.”
That was the second deviation.
“Other than losing Dad at the ripe old age of seven, I had a pretty good childhood, I guess. I know, actually. Mom buckled down and other than feeling sad for a few months around the funeral I came out okay. She’s still buckling down, but I’ve noticed the seams ever since…” He tapped his head.
“I’ve got a good friend called Jackson. We met in elementary school. You know, just kind of got seated next to each other, started talking and didn’t stop until the teacher yelled at us. We became frenamies and would alternate between beating each other up and playing tag. Boys do that.” He told Elsbeth when he saw a confused look on her face. “And then we eventually just became friends.”
I already knew that part.
“I suppose the big turning point was middle school, near the end of it.” Fail arched his fingers in thought. “Jackson got himself a girlfriend, see? Nothing serious, ‘cept it was. Call her V. The big thing about V os that she drove a bit of a wedge between us. They were all over each other sometimes, which I’m not entirely sure was legal. Fuck. Thanks, I didn’t want to know that. Either way, I would only occasionally get to hang out with my best bud and I would relish every opportunity.
“I looked forward to hanging out because Mom got a boyfriend around that time and I hated being around him, but he loved being around me. Like, it was real unhealthy and frankly creepy. So I was torn between spending time somewhere really uncomfortable, and a place I really wanted to be at, but couldn’t spend much time there. Then I noticed how tired Jackson was getting.”
Fail paused, his eyes dancing as he thought about what to say next. “I noticed at movie nights first. He’d conk out way before anyone else and stay out. It was fine, but that usually left V and me in the same place with nothing but each other, which neither of us were happy about. Then he conked out shortly into high school and he became an overnight celebrity. Stage 2 cancer in the brain.”
He dropped the twist quickly and kept going. “So. My best friend was in hospital. I didn’t know what to do and staying at home was harder and harder because the boyfriend was getting all geared up to move in. I snuck out a few times, and one time, one time, I bought Jackson some chocolates because fuck it. The dude had cancer and deserved something nice in the two hours he spent awake every day. I found myself hiding in Jackson’s room a few nights. The problem with that was that V found them and found it soo romantic.”
One of Fail’s hands was gripping the other tightly. Both the hand grabbing and the hand being grabbed were strained white by his grip. Then he suddenly relaxed.
“I had a habit of sleeping under his bed outside of visiting hours. The ones they had at the time were the perfect size for me to fit under and no one glancing in would realise I was there. I listened in to a few family visits that way. Anyway, V, we started talking because I was spending so much time with Jackson and she was obligated to visit him since he was her boyfriend. We’d always talk about me and my problems. I didn’t realise how strange it was for her to take such a deep interest in my issues.”
He moved his finger in a circle. “All that culminated one night when I was sleeping under the bed, having fled my home because of the boyfriend. V kissed me in my sleep, woke me up to my first- fourteenth kiss. She kissed me awake and was snuggled under the bed with me. There was nowhere I could move, I was trapped, I couldn’t push her away, nothing. That was the start of it.” I nodded, knowing what he was talking about.
Manifesting.
“It was like a dream sequence, you know?”
“More than you think.” Elsbeth told him.
I snorted, earning a harsh look from the girl.
“True.” He said, more to himself than Elsbeth, then resumed at his previous volume. “Everything went all fruity, then suddenly went negative. I told V something was wrong and she said that she needed it. I told V we weren’t talking about the same thing and she insisted that she needed this, someone to hold her since Jackson was asleep so much.
“I was so insanely calm about the whole thing that every time I tried to tell her how much I was panicking, V would just tell me how much I had grown on her. The only solace to that damnable calm was that it let me extract myself from under the bed where Jackson was sleeping. She tried to kiss me again once we were out, and that’s when the hospital shook.”
He grimaced. “It was Lance Light, a techo knock off of Archangel gone villain. He took the hospital hostage to make some insane point.”
“I remember him.” Elsbeth said. “What he did took me out of class and we all went to Vancouver.” She gave a wicked smile. “We ended up making the day into a field trip because it ended so quickly.”
I frowned and looked back to Fail. He gave a half hearted laugh.
“Yeah, well…” He took a moment to decide how to continue. “I took the opportunity to run from the crazy girlfriend. Made it out the door, closed it, told her to look after Jackson, then tried to get the rest of the way out. I ran into someone on the stairs. A pale woman with white hair and golden eyes. Not at the time because of the colour negative thing, but that’s what she normally looks like.”
“Deus Ex Machina.” I guessed.
Fail snapped his fingers and pointed at me. “She called me by my name even though I hadn’t said anything. She told me I would be safer closer to her and led me up. I couldn’t find it in myself to argue, and I was, uh… starstruck. Confused, but watching. So I followed Machina up and hid where she told me to. I heard some explosions. Saw some splatters spread across walls. Then I heard her put Lance Light down, and I heard the speech she gave him as well.”
He met my eyes. “She tailors it for everyone she kills, you know. After the bit that gets said every time she added ‘You have been sent to oblivion, but rejoice, for your memories remain, Pale Jeweler.’ And then she left. I’ve thought about those words a lot. It’s my most common dream.”
“What happened after that?” I asked to get him back on track. Also because I wasn’t interested in that kind of philosophical discussion right now.
“I lost time.” He answered. Elsbeth and I both nodded, expecting it. “Next thing I know, I’m standing in the apartment with Mom and she’s crying. A whole day has passed. Every trace of her boyfriend is gone and I don’t know what happened. Mom refused to tell me and nearly broke down when I pushed because it’s my fault. I had this power letting me know things that I shouldn’t, making me really good at guessing, and all the guesswork I tried didn’t put the picture together. Still hasn’t, and it keeps me up at night.”
“How did Fail start?” I asked.
He laughed mirthlessly. “I hacked into the hospital records because fuck it, why not, eh? I looked at the treatments Jackson was getting and they were all wrong. I corrected them, realised I could sell that kind of shit. Set up Fail M.D., advertised it online. Got a few hits. Gained popularity. Started charging the big bucks for the boys down south and made bank.”
He shrugged. “Took it down after a while. It was attracting too much attention.”
I noticed him wincing ever so slightly. He had been doing that with every joke and lie he said. “What was the real reason?”
He sighed. “Sorry. There wasn’t anything I could use. It was just boring bullshit. I’ll be honest, it’s a selfish craving. I only really care about the truths around me. I took some medical tests on a whim and aced them for the same reason. It means people are trying to get me to go to their universities now, ‘cause I’m a certified genius. That selfishness is what brought me here as well.”
“And that’s it?” I checked.
“Basically, yeah.” He shrugged. “That’s how I went from a troubled child to an oversharing Psychic. Your turn.”
The two words hit hard. I gripped the table and let my focus vanish into it. When I came out I was both calmer and much more intimate with the table. That was starting to become a habit.
“Alright.” I swallowed. It was time to open up the box.
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