A giant flaming ant was barreling towards Sam, and given that this boss room was its home, I had very little hope that it would care about the lava behind her.

Almost before I realized what I was doing, I threw myself in between them and braced behind my shield.

The impact was like a freight train… carrying a semi… which was itself carrying several smaller trucks.

I grunted with exertion, and my feet slid backward perilously toward the lava.

I’m… not… going down like this! With a primal yell, I shoved my shield to the left and managed to somewhat parry the tackle by pushing the ant’s face that way.

I made a follow-up slash with my sword and was about to chase the boss to press the attack when it fell into the channel and splashed lava everywhere.

I instead grabbed Sam’s arm and ran away from the lava.

“Okay, just stay behind me, and I’ll try to get it low for you,” I said.

“Got it,” she said.

I spun to face the ant as it began its next charge.

I once again grunted in a mixture of pain and exertion as it hit me. That also confirmed that I was taking damage from the attack.

However, as I managed to shove it off to the side and follow up with two quick swings, I was confident I would win the war of attrition.

Until it turned around and paused 20 feet from me and took a deep breath.

What is it- My eyes went wide as I curled up behind my shield.

“Get down!” Sam shouted as she bowled me over and then covered me.

Thanks to Sam’s timely intervention, the incoming flamethrower passed over me with no effect.

She rolled off as soon as it was over, and I popped up to my feet.

Bosses usually have an opening right after they attack, so… I charged forward and landed two blows, but I wasn’t fast enough to dodge the ensuing pincer grab. The ant tossed me like a plaything, and I went tumbling with my shield and sword lost.

I had a choice, left for shield, right for sword.

I sprinted left and pulled up my shield just in time for the ant’s next charge. Apparently, this boss decided to make sense, and Sam had lost aggro since I did all the damage.

“Catch!” Sam shouted as she tossed my weapon right as I finished blocking.

I caught my sword and made another quick strike on its flank.

Alright. I’ve got you dialed in now. I thought. You’re mine.

So, we repeated our song and dance. The only difference was that I didn’t try to press my luck after it decided to shoot its flamethrower.

The issue was when I finally got it down to where just a sliver of its health bar was showing. Meanwhile, I still had about a third of mine and a quarter of my stamina.

She should have it from here. I thought.

“Up to you now, Sam!” I called out.

“On it!” she replied.

I either overestimated her damage or underestimated the difficulty of trying to punch the giant beast. She could only land a strike here or there after I managed to block its charge. She also tried to cheese out some extra damage when it was doing its flamethrower by charging it, but it tossed her bodily and took a decent chunk out of her health bar.

We need this to work. I thought with a grimace. I’m getting weaker and weaker as attempts go on, and I might actually get caught in a loop of starving to death.

I didn’t have the HP or, more importantly, the SP, to keep blocking at Sam’s rate of damage.

Then I realized a solution. An absolutely idiotic solution.

I put my sword and shield away.

“What are you doing!?” Sam asked.

“I’m going to hold it in place as long as possible. I need you to DPS as fast as you can,” I replied.

“But you’ll die!”

“And then I’ll respawn,” I said casually as the boss started another charge. “All that matters is getting you out of here. So, get ready.”

“Okay,” she said firmly.

I acted nonchalant, but in reality, I was freaking out.

I don’t think I can do this. I thought as the ant was just 30 feet away. But I have to. 20 feet. Please. I begged whoever would listen. Just let me hold it down long enough! 10 feet.

Let me be strong enough to stop it! I screamed mentally. Then, in answer to my unspoken prayer, time slowed down.

System: Heroic Mentality detected. “Stand strong in the face of evil”

System: Heroic skill unlocked. Fortitude

“[FORTITUDE]!” I shouted as I caught a flaming pincer in my left and right hand.

There was no sliding this time. The ant’s attack was stopped dead in its tracks, and I was left holding onto its flaming appendages.

“Go!” I grunted to Sam.

She gave a warcry, charged the boss’s side, and began punching it as fast as possible.

However, the boss was apparently smart enough to realize that Sam was the real problem at the moment.

“I’m… not… letting… go!” I screamed in exertion and pain as the ant tried to wrestle its pincers free and attack Sam.

We’ve got it. She’s going to get the kill. I thought. Then the ant took in a deep breath.

“Titus!” Sam called out in concern.

“Continue DPS!” I shouted.

I took the flamethrower directly to my face and remained standing for five more seconds before my HP finally bottomed out, and I collapsed to the floor.

However, it was enough. Sam landed a final punch as the ant turned to her, and it evaporated before my eyes.

A split second later, Sam also disappeared.

Good luck in the outside world, partner. I thought. I’ll try to meet up with you soon. Take good care of my body.

Meanwhile, I still had to finish dying, so I had a few minutes of nothing but introspection mixed with a bit of pain.

Well, [Fortitude] is crazy. I thought as I replayed the events of the fight in my mind. I felt… Solid. I wonder if I’m completely immune to knockback with that active. I figured I would have to test that out, but there was one thing I was sure of. It definitely gave me damage reduction. There’s no way I would’ve been able to just hold on to flaming pincers like that.

That replay done, I had a concerning thought.

Wait. If I respawn, is it going to reset the boss fight again? That would mean…

“Noooooooo!” I screamed as I reappeared, not at the boss room entrance but the obelisk.

Right nearby, two women, whose shouting match I had interrupted, looked at me for a moment. Then, they went back to arguing.

“Now listen here, missy!” the human [Rogue] shouted while waving a knife. “That’s my body you got there, and I ain’t gonna accept no mamby-pamby pacifist wearing it! So, toughen up or give it back right now!”

“I’m telling you! I would give you your body back if I could!” the red-haired [Berserker] replied. “And we’ve fought as many of those stupid ants as we could, but we’re still stuck here! We need to find some other source of food now that the cafeteria’s gone, or we’re going to starve you old coot!”

My stomach growled in response, and that finally jogged my memory.

Right! The cafeteria! I just need to… I looked over at the blank wall. Oh. Maybe if I… “Activate hospitality protocol,” I said as I touched the obelisk again.

I was once again treated to the display of arcing electricity before getting zapped a tiny bit.

And then given the always concerning message.

System : Mana fingerprint verified. Welcome, Titus Demon Lord!

How exactly do mana fingerprints work? I asked myself as I walked towards the cafeteria. I mean, I’m not even in my body. Also, “Titus Demon Lord?” Shouldn’t that be [Demon Lord] Titus?

“Hey, you!” the [Berserker] said as she ran up to me. “You’re the [Hero], right? Would you please let me join your party? This old fossil is driving me batship crazy!”

She was soon joined by the [Rogue]. “Old fossil? You better have some respect for your elders, ya whippersnapper! Or I’ll tan your hide!”

“Food first, arguments later,” I said as I ignored them both and entered the cafeteria.

I sprinted over to the first section and nearly stuffed a whole hamburger in my mouth before hearing the voices again.

I pivoted around to see the two women entering as I hastily swallowed.

I thought the rooms were instanced by party? Why are they here?

-----

After sitting down for a meal with those two, I learned their names, Megan and Gertrude, and that they also had swapped bodies. They were both partyless and had only managed to meet up because they were the only ones waiting inside the “hospitality” areas when it expired. That meant they were both shoved back into the obelisk room simultaneously.

Either way, they were stuck because they hadn’t figured out how to kill the elite ants, and no one was around to help them.

After filling my belly, and my inventory (I wasn’t about to leave that much free food behind when I’d nearly starved to death), I took them out to the entrance of the boss room and helped them get their own kills on the elite ants.

It turns out that knowing that you just have to stick a torch into their face and then punch them makes the fight a whole lot easier.

So, I sat back and watched them vanish.

I could’ve joined Megan’s party and got a cut of the XP, but I figured it would be safer if I didn’t just in case something crazy happened.

And then, I was finally alone in the tutorial. I made doubly sure of that. I took a nap because I felt exhausted, and then I found out that the obelisk responds to the command “deactivate hospitality protocol” just as well as it does for enabling it.

Then, with an inventory full of food, a shield named Wilson, and far more skills than I should have been able to have, I killed the enemies I needed to hit level 5.

As I did, I got a weird achievement for being the last one to leave the tutorial.

I wanted to save my points and find out more before making any permanent choices, but I decided to pick up the [Map Interface] perk. I figured with no idea where I would be dumped off, having a map would be ideal if I were stuck in the wilderness somewhere.

After accepting that, I was transported out of the tutorial for good.

-------

System: Zone entered, Faroff Village. Faction - Vir

Well, that’s an odd name for a town. I thought as I appeared in a quaint village on a bright and sunny day.

I also was standing right next to an obelisk.

Well, darn. I guess I didn’t need to buy [Map Interface] just yet. I should try to get some more info before making my next purchase.

Then I noticed the little boy standing near me with his mouth open wide.

He dropped the stick he had been holding like a sword and then ran off yelling, “Dad! Dad! He’s here! Jake’s here!”

Jake? I thought as my eyebrows furrowed. How would he know my name? Or, I guess, my body’s name?

I decided to follow him, and I met the [Village Elder].

The good news? I had somehow managed to end up in the same location as everyone in my original party. Oh, and Gertrude. Though that part was some of the bad news. Apparently, the [Rogue] had almost tried to fight everyone in town right when she got there, and only news that there were stronger people off in the forest (AKA the rest of the party) was enough to calm her down and get her headed in that direction.

The strange news? There was an oddly specific and oddly wrong prophecy about all of us showing up. I wondered if that was related to the weird “System” messages I had gotten earlier where it sounded like someone had messed things up.

The bad news? They insisted on calling me Jake and said something about “Isekai body dysphoria” with a knowing smile every time I said I was actually Titus.

Either way, I headed out into the forest since, apparently, the rest of the party was pulling guard duty.

As soon as I got there, I saw the party milling around with several lime-green blobs scattered about.

Okay, those slimes must not be hostile. I thought. But we don’t have a tamer or anything, right? Where did those come from?

I was shaken out of my thoughts as Jake called to me, “Yo! Jake.” He emphasized his own name and made me terribly confused for a few seconds. “Titus was just catching us up on how you helped him get out of the tutorial.”

Titus- I mean, Sam- looked over at me.

“Thank you so much!” she shouted as she rushed over to me with a slimeball in hand. “I would never have made it out of there without you, and best of all, I got a ton of perk points!” She handed the slime over to Jake and said, “Watch this! [Summon Beautiful Lime Orb of Blobbiness]!”

As soon as she finished speaking, yet another slime appeared.

“Beautiful lime orb of blobbiness?” I asked with an eyebrow raised.

“B.L.O.B.!” she stated proudly.

“And that’s the chant for summoning a slime?”

She chuckled nervously. “Well, you see…”

“They are literally called that now,” Jake interjected. “Go ahead. [Identify] it.”

I shrugged. “[Identify].” Sure enough, it was a level 5 Beautiful Lime Orb of Blobbiness.

“Slime,” Jake continued. “It’s a perfectly good name for that creature. Why, oh, why did you pick something so ridiculous?”

“Because that’s my style!” Sam replied. “I mean, I also didn’t know it would name the entire species, but in my defense, the prompt was super confusing!”

Jake just sighed.

“Also, can I just say it’s really weird having Lindsey talk down to me like that?” Sam complained. “… I mean, except for martial arts. That’s kinda expected. She’s a real stickler about that.”

After that, we were joined by the rest of the party, and we swapped stories.

I found out that “Isekai body dysphoria” was something Garrett made up after Jake insisted that he was “Jake.” The villagers didn’t take kindly to anyone insinuating that a prophecy could be wrong, so the party reached an unspoken consensus to play along for now.

Other than that, it had just been a few days of guard duty. The villagers were afraid of leaving the town alone for good reason since there were way more monsters than there used to be.

They weren’t a big deal for me or anyone in the party. We all had our ways to basically one-shot the wolves, even Sam.

Speaking of Sam, she had gotten several powerups. She could use [Martial Arts] and [Elemental Strike], could summon slimes… err… BLOBs, was counted as a real member of the party, and was almost a normal adventurer now in every other way.

Well, except the whole “getting hurt by healing” thing.

Either way, the party was assembled, and it was time to head out and deactivate the first elemental dungeon… Tomorrow.

I was still a bit beat from my tutorial escapades, and we weren’t exactly in a rush because we knew exactly where the [Demon Lord] was, and there was no chance that she would cause a demon invasion.

That also gave us time to get ready for the trip.

We picked up tents, sleeping bags, and food. Well, I didn’t pick up any food. If anything, I had to share a bit of my stockpile to make room for other necessities.

Yes, everyone was jealous.

I also asked everyone’s thoughts about my perk options and picked up [Enhanced Map] and [Enhanced Party]. The latter of the two was amazing, and I was shocked it was only two perk points. We had some mock battles with it, and everyone was blown away at the coordination it allowed.

After that, it was time to hit the hay. There wasn’t enough extra room for us, so most of the party ended up pitching our tents and sleeping outside while still in the safety of the zone.

Well, most of us ended up sleeping. I woke up near the middle of the moonlit night and realized Sam was off by herself. I got up, picked up my shield because she was awfully close to the boundary of the zone, and ended up catching Sam staring off into the distance while stroking a BLOB.

“You really don’t need sleep, do you?” I asked.

She turned to me with a frown.

“Nope,” she replied. “Which is great and all because I haven’t felt a single bit tired since coming here. It’s just…” She clutched the BLOB tighter. “Lonely.”

“Wow, never thought about that,” I replied.

I sat next to her in awkward silence for a few moments.

“I guess I can stay up with you a bit,” I finally replied. “Not too long, though, because Jake’s body needs its beauty sleep.”

She chuckled. “Yeah, I bet it does.” She paused. “Are you sure you’ll be fine staying up like this? I ran you pretty ragged in the tutorial.”

“Yeah, I feel completely awake!” I replied. “Rarin’..” My thoughts started turning sluggish. “To… go…”

I didn’t even know I had collapsed until I woke up to Sam shaking me.

“Titus! Titus!” she shouted.

I looked up at her in confusion.

“Monsters are coming!” she shouted.

That was enough to finally wake me up. I took in the System messages and the encroaching horde of wolves in one go.

System: You have been put into magical sleep

System: You are no longer in magical sleep

“Go get the others!” I shouted as I pulled out my sword and put my shield into place.

“On it!” she said as she popped up. She hesitated for half a second before dropping her slimeball and shouting. “All BLOBs, attack those monsters!”

All told, the monster wave, which we would later learn that Sam caused, wasn’t as big of a deal as we expected.

Everyone in the party participated. Even Tim, despite his awkwardness with Emilia’s body.

In terms of MVPs, there was me, the BLOBs, Jake, and then a surprise one… Gertrude.

It didn’t seem like she would be a very good [Rogue] but in her words.

“Just cuz I don’t like knife fightin’ don’t mean I ain’t good at it.”

The real problem came in the aftermath. We were milling around, looting the bodies, when Sam’s voice broke us out of our thoughts.

“No! I don’t want to! Please don’t make me!” she shouted. She turned pale. “D-delete me? What do you mean?”

I rushed over to her. “Sam, what’s going on?” I asked.

“I’m getting messages from the System!” she said on the verge of tears. “I have to go open the gate, or it will erase me from existence!”

That doesn’t sound right. “Look carefully, Sam,” I replied as I put my hands on her shoulders. “Is there anything off about the messages? Like extra spacing or something?”

She wiped away the tears. “Umm… One sec.” Then her eyes went wide. “It’s lowercase! It isn’t the real System!”

I nodded. “Thought so. In that case, no need to worry about a fake System, right?”

system: I may not be the System, but my power is real, boy

I could practically feel the vitriol in the last word.

“Well, you must not be that powerful if you need someone like Sam to do your dirty work,” I replied. “And even if you could erase her, I wouldn’t if I were you.”

system: Why should I listen to you?

“Because she’s the only [Demon Lord] you’ve got, numbskull.”

system: No matter, I can just assign another

Frick. If that’s not a bluff, Sam’s in trouble.

“Assign whoever you want,” I blustered. “I’ll take down whoever you send.” Meanwhile, my mind was racing. “Or…” I finally stated. “I have an offer. You don’t erase Sam, and I let her open the gate.”

Sam’s eyes widened. “Titus? I don’t think that’s a good idea.”

“system’s” message interrupted her in the middle.

system: Hahaha. Now that’s an interesting proposal. You would let me conquer this puny world for the sake of your friend?

It’s also my own body, so I’m not quite sure of the ramifications of that. I thought, but I obviously wouldn’t let either Sam or “system” know about that.

“Who said anything about letting you conquer the world?” I challenged. “I’m going to let her open the gate. Then we’re gonna fight. If you win, we bow out. The world’s yours. If we win, you have to leave and never return after putting us back into our correct bodies.”

system: It seems like those terms favor you quite heavily there, boy.

Frick, what else could I offer him? I didn’t have a clue, but, fortunately, I didn’t need to.

system: No matter. You could ask for anything you want if you win because you will never be a match for me.

system: Take all the time you want. Take decades if you have to! I’ll be there, waiting to grind you and your stupid little band of misfits INTO THE DIRT!

From there, I was offered two quests. One for reopening the gate, which only said Sam would be deleted if I failed, and a second for defeating “system’s” invasion force which promised to restore us to our original bodies if we succeeded.

He left off any consequences if we failed, but it was obvious what they would be.

Then I had to explain everything to the rest of the party. They weren’t exactly thrilled that I had chosen all of that without them, but Jake supported my decision based on the options I had, and we managed to win everyone over.

Well, we didn’t have to win Gertrude over. We basically just told her that we would probably get to fight a bunch of really tough enemies, and she instantly agreed while muttering something that sounded like, “like those dang Japs.”

However, we all agreed that my decision would be one that we wouldn’t be broadcasting to the world at large. We didn’t think that the Placeholderians would be that thrilled if they learned I had made a bet with their world on the line.

Speaking of Placeholderians, we met with the [Village Elder] after that, and he explained what he had learned about the waves and how the [Demon Lord] had to have been near. The [King] was mobilizing troops to defend the village, but it was defenseless to another wave in the meantime.

So, by order of the [King], we had to either stay there or take care of the nearby dungeon. We elected to deal with the dungeon.

The dungeon was incredibly easy.

Don’t get me wrong, there were venomous spiders, and we had to fight past some arachnophobia. There was also a very suspicious chest that I was glad I called for a [Mage Bolt] to check it from range. Other than that, Sam’s BLOBs helped us make it through without much difficulty.

Even the boss was a relative cakewalk. Garrett and Lindsey had coordinated spell purchases, so we had every element covered. That’s before you add both Sam and me to the mix since both of us had [Elemental Strike]. However, it took us embarrassingly long to figure out the boss’s gimmick.

The only difficulty we had was when it turned tangible, and we had a bit of trouble dealing enough damage to go to the next phase.

Fortunately, I could take its hits no problem and keep it in place while our ranged attackers and BLOBs did most of the damage. Then, we abused the fact that Sam was immune to the fire wolves to cheese out some rest time to get everyone’s resources back.

With the boss defeated, I hit level 11, and the rest of the party (excluding Sam) hit level 10. We even got some perk points out of it, so I picked up [Survivalist Party]. That perk meant that no one in my party would bleed as long as one of us was up.

After that, things weren’t nearly as eventful.

We traveled south and made it into the swamp. It took us ages of wading around and near-drowning before we finally located the dungeon in the center of a lake. If it hadn’t been for Sam’s BLOBs and the fact that she alone didn’t need to breathe, we might have had casualties or been stuck searching there for years.

However, the best part about the swamp had to be the dungeon. We learned that in Placeholder, the [Demon Lord] is responsible for setting up the dungeons. We also learned that it is possible to stuff an absolutely absurd number of treasure chests into a single dungeon while also having room for the other requirements.

Yes, we did have to fight a boss of Sam’s design. She activated the dungeon, and we wanted to make sure it was deactivated and that we got the extra XP from beating the boss.

As for what we fought? A Giant BLOB. Yeah, it was my idea, but Sam was drawing a huge blank, and we didn’t want to stick around in the swamp any longer than we needed to.

So our party cleared the first dungeon, and we began our travels north.

The next place we came to was a place called Deepmine Town. They were facing some tough times because a dungeon had been created inside their mine, and the criminal underworld was starting to slowly take over.

We didn’t know how to root out any of the criminal activity, but we figured we could at least take care of the mine.

The mine was pretty easy, but the boss fight was a lot harder than I expected. It was filled with spiders that were made of iron and a giant iron spider boss that constantly summoned more. We were in serious danger of dying then if my panic and desire to take down the boss as quickly as possible hadn’t resulted in yet another [Hero] skill… [Sunder].

[Sunder] made things way easier for us. It one-shot that boss, got me even more perk points and, in general, trivialized most fights against a single tough enemy.

It was the perfect sword and [Fortitude] was the perfect shield.

When we got to Vir, we linked up with Doom Fury. We spread the information about dungeons, had some members learn [Message], and got Doom Fury’s word that they would organize people to head to the west for the final confrontation.

Not that everything went that smoothly on our travels. Sam’s [Monster Magnet] perk got us into trouble a few times, but we weren’t in a hurry, so we simply backtracked out of the zone, located the dungeon without Sam, and then cleared it so that there were no more hostile monsters.

It was good for XP but not nearly as good as the dragon.

We had made it nearly out of Vir when we heard of the first attacks. However, once we heard that it had been [Identified] as level 25, we weren’t about to let such juicy XP a terrifying menace go unchecked.

We backtracked, managed to locate the cave that it had been coming through (along with the portal to the dragonlands), and then we set an ambush.

Yeah, I had a lot of confidence in [Sunder] and [Fortitude], but [Fortitude] would do nothing to protect the other squishy members of my party if a dragon decided they looked like tasty snacks.

“Is it really okay?” Jake asked as we heard the dragon roar in pain as it was swarmed by literal tons of BLOBs.

I glared at him. “We can fight the next one toe-to-toe if you want, but I’d rather play it safe when something’s more than double my level.”

“Breathe,” he commanded calmly.

I might have snapped at him again if we hadn’t gotten another achievement for slaying a dragon and a veritable shower of levels.

So, instead of snapping, I took his advice and fell into a natural rhythm that his body was used to.

That’s the other significant change that I had started to notice.

Our personalities were starting to take on some of the traits of our host bodies. Jake spoke a lot less than he used to. I was now dealing with his anger issues. Sam was… depressed? I think that was more a consequence of becoming the “[Demon Lord] of Despair,” but I didn’t really see any other major changes to her.

The others were all manageable, except for Gertrude.

She started stealing things.

We were stuck with a [Rogue] who would [Steal] something from your inventory and then physically fight you if you called her out on it.

Fortunately, we had enough loot that it didn’t really matter, but it drove home that we needed to get everyone changed back ASAP.

So, we charted a boat and set sail for the cold north and the home of a strange group of people living in the snow and ice.

Where we also found yet another surprise.

“Please take me with you!” the red-haired [Berserker] begged. “I can’t stay here living like this!”

She had been transported to that frozen landscape and, of course, immediately tried to steal something.

She was then captured, sentenced to work as a [Laborer], and then caught stealing again to add even more time to her sentence.

However, I was a bit of a sucker for a damsel in distress… or was that Jake’s personality leaking through? I was honestly starting to lose track a bit, but aside from the anger, I had a feeling that maybe Jake was better suited to this whole [Hero] thing than I was anyway.

So, despite her being under-leveled, not that helpful in a fight, and yet another thief to deal with, I took her into the party.

She did end up being useful. A [Berserker’s] [Cold Resistance] is nothing to sneeze at. After getting some levels by the party defeating some Dark Polar Bears, she was able to go out and scout alone.

We eventually found the next dungeon, and it was a loot-fest just like the last one. Our entire party was decked out in enchanted gear from head to toe, and Jake and I even cobbled together entire suits of plate mail.

As for the boss, Sam made a huge Ice Knight that we had to fight because she was trying to bump up the level as high as she could. Unfortunately, it seemed like Megan was the only one who got much XP from it.

With ice cleared, we traveled back south before heading east to the fire dungeon.

We went through a grueling desert before reaching a volcanic region, and then it was the same story as the last dungeon.

The only difference was that this time Sam made a lava monster… which she soloed. She was immune to all of its attacks, so it seemed like the safest way to do it.

We were a bit jealous when she got some achievements for soloing a boss, and the rest of the party wanted to get that achievement too, but we didn’t think of a good way to go about that since none of the bosses we had met were soloable for the rest of us… Well, I figured I could probably take on the Deepmine boss by myself, but that seemed incredibly out of the way, and I wasn’t exactly hurting for perk points.

Then, it was on to air.

The air dungeon was an annoying climb. Honestly, we were in the most danger there out of just about any time during our adventure, and it was just because if we fell from that distance, we would be 100% instakilled.

Fortunately, our climbing gear stood up to the test, and we found ourselves on top of the world… and once again bombarded with treasure.

Oh, and I guess we fought a boss there… what was it again?

I vaguely remember one-shotting it, but I guess I didn’t even get its name.

Oh well.

Anyway, then we finally had a countdown. 6 months before the demon invasion started in the west.

We prepared as best as we could.

We sent out an all-call to the adventurers and said that this was everyone’s chance to get their bodies back. We gave out as many details as we could about ways to get stronger, and we strongly advised people not to bring fire or ice magic based on what we knew of demons from Sam’s resistances.

Speaking of Sam, she was a lynchpin in forming our defense.

She didn’t bother picking up [Hell Blaze] and instead opted to make as many demon-slaying monsters as possible.

The first monster was heavenhounds (my suggestion). She gave them a healing breath attack, and we figured they would function as a rapid-response unit for either dealing damage or healing.

The second monster was animated armors. Sam wasn’t so happy once she realized she would be sending such good dogs to die, so she went with more non-sentient appearing monsters. Since we also wanted to have a tanky monster, she came up with that because there was nothing more defensive than literal suits of armor, right?

The third monster was cupids. They looked like little baby angel statues that flew around with bows and arrows. They weren’t that strong, but if I’m being honest, it was something of a stroke of genius to have flying ranged attackers in that third slot. After all, we were rapidly running out of floor space for our combatants.

The fourth monster… Oh, the fourth monster…

We didn’t really need anything else, so it was up to Sam to make whatever the heck she wanted.

That’s how we ended up with “Angel BLOBs.” They were the same as the other BLOBs, but they could fly… and they healed people with their acid instead of hurting them.

I begged her not to make too many of those, but she still snuck several in.

In addition to summoning a veritable army, Sam also fortified the fortress as best as she could. She placed the portal in the throne room because it was the most spacious, and the room gave her a buff. And also because the System wouldn’t let her do anything silly like spawn it 20 miles up so that any demons that came out would just fall to their deaths (yes, that was one of the first things she tried. Sometimes Sam was even better at cheesing things than I was).

Other than that, the only thing to do was help the other parties coming in by giving them the best gear and advice we could for the upcoming fight… Oh, and level up to the cap of 25 by going hunting in the dragonlands. And by that, I mean that we saw a level 35 dragon, ran for our lives, and somehow managed to get it stuck in the castle’s basement.

We had a max-level party that was decked out in the best gear. We had an army of decently leveled adventurers. We even had a horde of friendly monsters to serve as our cannon fodder.

As the timer ticked down to 0 for the demon invasion, I was confident.

Oh, how naïve I was.

----

An aura unlike any I had felt blanketed the room. It was all I could do to shield my party from its effects.

Then, a giant figure who had to be nearly 8 feet tall strode through the portal.

He crushed the spikes that we created right in front of the portal with his black armored boots and then cast his gaze across the room as his health bar appeared.

Admin, Demon King of Wrath.

“L-level 50,” Garrett said after he finished casting an [Identify].

The room was mostly stunned into inaction, so I had to be the one to break it.

“He’s the leader! Just take him down, and we got this!” I called. “Sam, send in the monsters!”

I shocked her out of her stupor, and then she called out. “Right! All monsters, attack!”

Cupid arrows plinked harmlessly off Admin’s spiky black armor. The animated armors charged and encircled him, but he pulled out a great club and scattered them with a single swing. The angel BLOBs fell on him from the ceiling, but he cleared them all with a single mocking cast of [Hell Blaze].

“Now, you all understand,” Admin bellowed to the room. “This is my world. Feel despair for defying me as I CRUSH YOU ALL!”

With that pronouncement, Admin vanished. We didn’t have a clue where he went until we saw the first [Cleric] sent flying by one of Admin’s powerful swings.

Then he vanished before repeating his attacks in quick succession.

“Jake! [Guard] Andrew!” I shouted even as I gave him the same order through the party link. I also sprinted in that direction.

Jake was just in time. His [Guard] put his shield directly in the path of Admin’s swing… Which meant that Jake was sent flying instead of Andrew. I rushed over and put my shield up to prepare for the next attack… but there wasn’t one. He simply went after the next healer.

We can’t pin him down. He’ll murder all of the healers before we can even put a scratch on him.

Then, to make matters worse, Admin reappeared in the center of the room.

“Well!? What are you waiting for?” he bellowed at the portal. “GET IN HERE!”

Demons and monsters started pouring through the entrance, but I had eyes only for the monster who was single-handedly destroying us all.

Please! I begged the System. I need something. Anything that will let me lock him down for a fight!

He scattered an entire party of archers as the System answered my request.

“Admin!” I shouted as I ran to the middle of the room. “I issue you a [Hero’s Challenge]!” I proclaimed as I raised my sword at him.

Suddenly, the room was dead quiet.

We were the only two there.

“Ah, another pitiable [Hero] skill,” Admin sneered as he walked toward me. “Fortunately, I have my own skills.”

He raised his fingers and was about to snap when I interrupted him.

“What’s the matter? Are ya chicken?” I called out.

He glared at me, and lifted his fingers again.

“BAWK, BAWK. B-BAWK!” I shouted as I awkwardly waved my arms like chicken wings.

His only response was to instantly reappear in front of me with his great club swinging down at me.

“[FORTITUDE]!” I managed to shout in complete panic as the club met my shield.

It rattled my entire body, but I somehow came out of it unharmed. The same was true of the second and third strikes.

Then, I had my opening.

“[Sunder]!” I shouted as I slashed at him with a normal attack.

Just as hoped, I managed to bait out his [Reflect Attack], and I was hit by the damage of my own sword strike… then I hit him with the real [Sunder].

He yelled in pain, and I was pumped at my victory.

Then I looked at the health bar.

5%. I thought. 20 [Sunders] to take him down.

I was suddenly a lot less confident about my odds.

“Well, [Hero],” Admin sneered. “How does it feel to see the gap between us? And this is just a weak avatar. If I had come in person, you wouldn’t have lasted a mere second.”

“If that’s the case, why didn’t you come yourself? You scared?” I blustered.

He laughed. “No, this body is more than enough TO SEE YOU SUFFER!”

He blinked forward, and I prepared for another round of defending until I had an opening.

He had other plans.

“[Disrupt]!” he snapped with his left hand as his right smashed down with the club. “[Power Strike]!”

The skill he’d [Disrupted]? [Fortitude].

I was slammed mercilessly to the floor as I felt the bones in my left arm snap.

My HP was down to maybe 30, and [Enhanced Interface] helpfully informed me of my conditions as I coughed up blood. Broken arm, Major. Internal Bleeding, minor. Concussion.

If I knew anything about Placeholder’s mechanics, I should have been dead from that single attack.

“And one strike was all it took,” Admin taunted as he reached down, knocked my helmet off, and then picked me up by the throat.

“Thanks for opening the gate, [Hero],” he continued. “I couldn’t have done it without you.”

I was beaten. I had unleashed a veritable monster upon the world. One that couldn’t be slain by any [Hero] the world could ever produce.

However, [Sunder] was off cooldown, and I would use it anyway.

Please. I begged the System. This is my fault. No matter the cost, I have to put him down right here.

My HP was dropping from internal bleeding, and my vision started swimming as I began to suffocate.

“Let me take him down, even if it costs me everything!” I shouted with air that I shouldn’t have had. My sword lit up for [Sunder] again, and I saw something strange in Admin’s eyes.

Fear.

He dropped me and reappeared dozens of feet away.

Meanwhile, I landed on my feet and used what would surely be the last boon the System would ever grant me.

“[HEROIC SACRIFICE:” I yelled.

“NO!” Admin shouted back. “[Disrupt]!”

He used the skill, and I felt as if a chunk of my very essence was stripped away, but I stalked ever forward.

“SUNDER,” I continued as my sword blazed like a second sun.

“[[Refresh Cooldown]], [Disrupt]!”

He snapped again, and I felt another shockwave through my body, but I was deadset.

“MAXIMIZED]!” I shouted as I blinked forward with more power than I had ever felt in my life.

Admin tried to blink away, but the skill didn’t let something like that stop it. It simply followed him as my sword cleaved him in half.

It was strange. I didn’t feel the impact, and the skill was missing its normal thunderclap.

The boss HP bar was empty, though. I felt like that was… important?

Then, I saw people… No, the party… standing above me. The [Knight]… Jake?... was calling for a healer, but he wasn’t audible.

I’m fine, see? I said as I waved my hand to get his attention.

My hand that was breaking apart into pieces that themselves turned into vanishing motes of light.

I stared at it in fascination for a few moments.

“Sorry… Jake,” I somehow managed to find my vocal cords. “It doesn’t look like you’ll get your body back after all.”

I took one more breath, and then… my eyes just felt so heavy…

.

.

.

.

System : Well, I’ll be da-… He actually did it.

system: THIS ISN’T OVER! YOU DROVE BACK THE INVASION, BUT IT LOOKS LIKE I’M GOING DOWN IN PERSON AFTER ALL!

System : Wow. Sore loser. Don’t worry, kid. I’ve got this handled.

System : Just run a quick update here… Yeah, Admin can count as a load-bearing boss[1]. Why not? Convince a few of the isekai-ees to think that should be the case, and… boom. Portal is down.

system: The portal is down?... YOU! I’VE FINALLY FOUND YOU, TRAITOR! I’LL MAKE YOU PAY!

System : Actually, pretty sure it’s you that has to pay. Fixing all their bodies ain’t gonna be cheap.

system: The invasion is not over UNTIL I SAY IT’S OVER!

System : Once again, batting 0. The invasion is over when I a neutral third party… *snort*… sorry. Can’t believe the System bought that I’m a neutral party for this quest.

System : Anyway, I declare your invasion over as they have beaten all of the forces that made it outside the gate, and the gate is closed, never to open again because there is no way the Demon Lord would be stupid enough to open it again. So, get to fixing.

There was a delay. I couldn’t tell for how long because it was difficult to understand much of anything at the moment.

However, I did eventually feel something change.

system: ... You will pay dearly for this.

System : Oh noooo, however will I survive after the Great Admin with his…. HAHAHA, your avatar, your trip down to the world, and that fix put you into a negative balance!? What have you been spending your manipulation points on!? How are you so bad at this!?

system: Enjoy being trapped in this backwater, traitor.

System : Aaand he broke the connection to Placeholder. Wow, if this was my own timeline, I would be seriously miffed.

There was another delay.

System : You’ve been awful quiet. What’s going on with you? Every Titus I’ve known would have had some kind of comeback or complaint by now.

System : No Memory Protection, so I guess I’ll just check you out real quick-like.

System : Wow… WOW. Good gravy, you burned everything with that skill. I knew the Heroic Sacrifice line was something, but… just, wow

System : I really shouldn’t use my manipulation points on this, being in another timeline and all… but… there are so very few timelines where Admin gets so thoroughly rekt… especially so quickly, Mr. Speedrun McGee. So, I’ll do you a solid.

System : It will take a lot of stuff from you and Jake, too. Mostly skill and perk-wise, but that’s not a problem, right?

I gave the nonverbal equivalent of a groan.

System : Alright, sounds like consent to me. Hang tight!

.

.

.

.

I gasped for air as I suddenly bolted upright.

I was back in the throne room, but my body felt awfully heavy… and nauseous.

I puked my guts out before standing back up and surveying the scene.

“It’s… TITUS!” Lindsey, the cat-eared [Sorceress] shouted as she sprinted in my direction and nearly knocked me off my feet.

“Woah, Lindsey,” I said. “That’s not like you.”

“That’s because I’m Sam!” she replied as she hugged me tighter. “You did it! We all got our bodies back!”

She disengaged and then smiled. “And it looks like that even goes for you,” she said as she pointed at the top of her head.

I ran my hands through my hair… and encountered a distinct lack of horns.

“I’m… human?” I asked in disbelief.

“Looks like it to me!” Sam replied cheerfully. “We’re all back to normal! Though, Jake’s a bit salty about losing his [Hero] class.”

Speak of the Jake, he finally noticed me too and sprinted over.

He popped me in the shoulder. “That’s for losing my class and all my levels!” he said. Before I could apologize, he wrapped me in a bear hug. “And that’s for coming back safe!” he said when he disengaged.

“What are you whippersnappers doing?” Gertrude snarled.

She stalked over to us, and I didn’t know what to say.

Then she gave a big grin. “The man’s a hero!” she said. Then, despite my protests, she hefted me up onto her shoulder. “Let’s hear it for the HERO OF PLACEHOLDER!” she shouted to the entire room.

The entire room began shouting “TI-TUS” in unison, and I nearly died of embarrassment.

However, looking at all my friends cheering along, I couldn’t help but grin.

Maybe this world isn’t so bad after all.

------

To do this day, I’m still not quite sure what the secret ingredient was for the success of that timeline.

Maybe the mixture of my personality with Jake’s just made for a more potent [Hero].

Maybe it was the fact that a certain admin was uncharacteristically helpful.

Or maybe it was unironically the power of friendship. A [Demon Lord] and a [Hero] who join together are certainly a force to be reckoned with.

I suppose at the end of the day… it doesn’t truly matter. I just know that among an omniverse of infinite possibilities, this was a timeline that defied what I knew could be done.

However, despite the great victory in that timeline, it wasn’t without cost.

Jake and I were both reset to level 1. All our perks and skills were gone, along with our unique classes. We were both bog-standard [Warriors] after that.

However, that was a blessing in its own way. I was free to live out my life as an average adventurer. Living, loving, and dying in the same timeframe as my loved ones.

There were no more [Heroes], no more [Demon Lords], and no more admins to interfere.

It wasn’t idyllic. Wars and strife still happened. It doesn’t require a [Demon Lord] for men to commit acts of cruelty to each other.

However, I can’t help but remember that timeline fondly.

After all, where else can I find a place where I am remembered as Titus… the First and Last [Hero] of Placeholder?

[1] Load-bearing boss – A video game trope where defeating the boss inexplicably causes their entire base to self-destruct.

In this case, a slightly more tame version as he was considered “load-bearing” for the portal connection.