《Abomination》Chapter 17 Apologies? (Unedited)
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“So pup, what will it be?” Lucifer chuckled as he stood above a bound and helpless Luna. He was truly not that interested in the answers she would most likely give. Only sadistic urges to torment and traumatize the wolf remained at the front of his mind. The initial reason for the fight lost almost entirely.
Luna herself could scarcely remember why or how things had gotten this far. She knew subconsciously that she loves and cares for her brother. But something inside her could not stand Lucifer's arrogance and the fact that he could not see her greatness. This made even worse when he fantasized about his ideal mate without thinking of her. The Shadow Queen. A Queen without equal. Countless desired her yet Lucifer did not even know his own luck or the envy males around the world would feel for him. In a sense Luna had the same Sin as Lucifer, Pride. While Beasts did not commune with the Spirit World, they still are the closest beings alive to the spirits and the Sins they represent. A lion is the king of the jungle and represents Pride. A sloth sleeps all day and shows Sloth in the highest degree, besides being named after the Sin. The Beasts are really the true reflections of Spirits. So Luna’s pride not only comes from her exalted bloodline but also herself. Her entire being as a Shadow Queen Wolf embodies Pride.
“Why even ask? You only want to hurt me. Don't forget I am connected to your mind Lucifer.” Luna answered solemnly. Her mind though was working overtime to find a way to diffuse the situation. She truly did not wish to die or part with Lucifer. She wished to apologize but it meant nothing now, Lucifer had already given into his Wrath. Now, Wrath needed to be dealt out and there was no way around it.
“Here I'll give you a chance then.” Lucifer said as he crouched down so that his face was level with Luna's. “You submit to me. Or find another way for me to trust you. Wrath is my Sin but so is Pride. I will not injure yours. I just want to trust you.”
Finally the world stopped. Luna lay there stricken with self loathing and a broken body. Everything was for trust. The Wrath Lucifer felt may be towards the entire world; herself included, but Lucifer truly wanted to be able to trust Luna. He did not wish her dead, far from it. He wanted her to stay by his side, forever. His first and only friend; that he currently couldn't trust, her death would destroy him. So Lucifer wanted to make her submit. Pledge her undying loyalty. A severe and sacred thing for Beasts.
Submission. An example of submission would be Fenrir and Cerberus. The two Kings of the Lupin familia. These two kings only bow for the Queen, the Shadow Queen Wolf. Their everything was for the Queen, life and death was decided by the Queen. Two God Beasts at the whims of another. That is what submission is. If Luna submitted to Lucifer, that was effective to giving him control of the entire Lupin familia. She could not do such an outrageous thing no matter if Lucifer had pure intentions or not.
Thus the two entered into a back and forth of for and against. Unknowingly Luna and Lucifer sat face to face bickering like children as if the entire process of life or death fighting never happened. A testament to their true emotions. Lucifer being only 10 could not understand something like psychological trauma, his only wish was to prove himself and his right. Luna being of similar age did not know that Lucifer's actions were a little heavy handed. She only knew that having Lucifer was everything to her. And while she couldn't control the bloodline within her, she could at least explain to her dear brother what was happening.
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Evening soon came upon the two. Luna unbound lay before Lucifer as he sat next to the fire lit for night. The two were finally able to move forward, a bit. Although Luna had not submit to Lucifer the two still were able to sit relatively at ease.
“You as a primarch are unique. Your blood is purer than any other like you. Your dragon lineage is so pure that you'd be welcomed by all dragons. Even the King of Beasts would find it hard to tell which generation draconian you are. This gives you the chance to cultivate like a true draconian, like a dragon! This is why I stopped the knife ear-bitch from ruining your Mana Core with two-leg ways. Even your ancestor Nephilims chose similar methods of growing their Cores.” Luna said seriously as she stared into the flickering light of the open flame.
“For Beasts, we form our Mana Core at the end of our infantile stage. For you that is hard to say when is. Dragons have a 10 year infantile stage. Nephilims from record, 6 year. So while you could use Mana since age 6, your Core will not be truly formed. Do you see now your real issue? It was not that you simply couldn't project Mana but that your Core was not finished forming.”
“Now it should be complete, this is why I spoke nothing of itt. Plus your strength is leaps and bounds beyond what you should have at your age. You are strong enough for now.” Luna calmly consoled Lucifer. Being told you simply can't do something is a lot more severe then not yet able to.
“Why?”
“Why what Lucifer?”
“Why not fucking tell me this before Luna?” Lucifer snapped in anger. Though he never laid eyes on Luna she could still remember feeling of his dragon eye when it locked on her during their fight. It sent shivers through her body, just remembering the sensation of being before that eye. “You had years to tell me. Yes being able to use Mana like the Beasts is great and I want the ability, but how come you never fucking told me?” Lucifer's question hung in the air as Luna did not know how to answer. How did she say, you're a child and should listen to me, when she is a child herself? This brought the duo to their next major topic.
Luna. Luna changed over the years. After completing the bonding with Lucifer, she became reclusive. Hiding in his shadow, speaking only when interested, only coming out for food and cuddles with Lucifer at night. She became completely antisocial and a shut in, in a sense. Like a teenaged brat, was the most apt way to describe her behavior. While the ages might coincide, the reasoning was completely off. Luna, as an Apex Beast possessed a powerful bloodline. Her bloodline is what told her of the bonding, it was bloodline that made her love darkness more than being at Lucifer's side like she used to.
A Shadow Queen, is not so different from an Ice Queen. Both are cold, calculative, decisive and like solitude. But a Shadow Queen needs her light as an Ice Queen needs her warmth. The most stalwart women always have a weakness,their hearts. But a true Queen needs nothing, or so society would have us believe. Lucifer and Luna follow this to the letter. Society deemed Lucifer, taboo so he was forced to live without the warmth of a loving family. Luna's bloodline made her believe she was the epitome of perfection and all her thoughts and actions were absolutely impossible to be without error. A result of society conditioning the Shadow Queen into hating all light, Luna hated the light. Conditioned to be royal and above others, Luna too was above explaining herself to anyone. It was all one big circle of bullshit when you broke it down.
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A snake is born knowing how to shed it's skin. The snake just knows that the skin is dead and must come off, even the most effective way to remove the skin seems to be programmed into their brain since birth. Luna's bloodline did the same to her, it ‘programmed’ her to have a superiority complex and become reclusive.
“Well, it's hard to explain Lucifer. You know how your lineage makes you love battle and bloodshed? This is kind of the same. I am a Shadow Queen Wolf. The Matriarch and pinnacle of the Lupine familia. I am naturally superior to all Lupine Beasts. Neither Cerberus or Fenrir can tame a Shadow Queen Wolf, this is also why I cannot submit to you.” Luna said sullenly as her wolfen head sunk at the confirmation. She knew that her actions; while attributed to her bloodline, could not be easily forgiven. Lucifer even gave her a seemingly fair deal to wipe the past errors away, but she could not accept his goodwill. Her submission was too precious for any being, regardless of the situation. Even the King of Beasts did not try and take a Shadow Queen as concubine, the Shadow Queen position in the Lupine familia was too sensitive.
“Then there is nothing left for us.” Desolately Lucifer responded. Her felt that there was no need to continue being near each other if there was no trust. He could not trust someone who would withhold important information from him for silly reasons such as pride. Relationships for Lucifer were sacred things. Only Eric and Luna had his true trust. Luna recently broke that trust and she could not fix it in the way Lucifer wanted.
“Please Lucifer! Anything but submission!” Luna bawled as she crawled forward into Lucifer's open lap. Heart broken she cried tears that have never been shed before.
“Then just accept me!”
“How can I, you will die if I submit! Do you think that the submission of a Shadow Queen will go unheard of? Do you really think that my familia is anywhere as easy to evade as yours? Do you think that we can just pretend it never happened if I submit? Lucifer don't tell me you are that naive!”
“Well how the fuck else am I supposed to get over the fact you treat me like a servant subconsciously, the fact that you truly think so little of me that you refuse to even tell me simple things, how Luna!”
“I don't know! Just love and treat me like you always do. I don't want to leave you!”
“Neither do I you stupid pup! But if you want my love then give me yours! Even a social outcast like me knows of give and take.” Lucifer screamed out as he let his wish known.
Silence befell the two as their emotions danced along with the flames of the fire. Lucifer put Luna in a very delicate situation. His words, emotions and actions proved his affection for his lupin companion. But did her’s reflect the same?
“Go to sleep for the night Lucifer. In the morning I'll explain the Beast method of Mana Core growth. I need to sort out my emotions right now.” Luna stated as she entered into the sea of darkness surrounding the firelight. She could not think straight and refused to allow Lucifer to openly cut off their ties to each other. Lucifer didn't respond and only continued to stare blankly into the fire's depths. And like that he sat. For the entire night with only his breathing making his life visibly. As the night wore on some of Talk Forest’s nocturnal birds and wildlife even perched on and around him yet his body showed no response. It seemed as if Luna's departure took his soul away, while it was not definite it still hurt Lucifer deeply. This was after all his first night without her in his arms, it was doomed to be lonely for Lucifer.
“Why did I do this?” Luna sighed bitterly as she stood in the dark shadows looking at Lucifer from a distance.
“It's not like I needed to do anything hard to stop this from happening. So why is my body telling me different things to my heart?”
Confusion, self loathing, despair, anxiety, all coursed throughout Luna as she spent the night in self reflection.
Minutes turned to hours and hours turned the sky red with morning's light. Luna desperately tried to find a way for Lucifer to understand her emotions and her heartfelt apology. But her bloodline and pride held her back from making her true feelings known to Lucifer. The constant pull push between her two emotions put Luna into a state of constant flux she could barely understand what was going on in her mind and heart. So finally as the new day and the sun began to take its place in the sky, Luna finally made her decision. As she left her shadowy hideaway she moved towards Lucifer that still sat staring at the embers of last night's fire. Taking every step with resolution and decisiveness she walked towards Lucifer's still form.
“Lucifer I want to apologize. I'm sorry for the way I was acting and the way I treated you. I know the apology is late but I truly wish to let you know how sorry I am for my actions. Please. Lucifer you are the only one I can talk to. The only one I can be with. You didn't hate hate me or judge me for the way I looked you didn't betray me in any way for as long as we were together. You are the only one I can call brother and family in this world and I know that I did not treat you as such. But please forgive me dear brother.” Luna exclaimed soon as she saw Lucifer lift his head to look at her. The floodgates that held her tears the night before or finally let loose in all their roaring Fury. The lupin eyes released torrents of water as she leapt towards Lucifer and tried to enter his embrace to feel the warmth she always felt.
“What is an apology?” Lucifer asked calm and matter of factly. He had never been taught of apologies by Eric or Yue. He racked his brain to try and remember if any of his lessons ever included 'apology’ but he found nothing.
“Wait what do you mean? You don't know what an apology is?”
“Why else would I ask? Plus you were next to me during most of my lessons so you should know I've never been taught it.”
“Well this is fucking great! I spent the whole bullshit of a fucking night coming up with an apology and you; Mr Draconic Nephilim, don't even know what it means!” Luna raged and screamed full of hysteria. She was absolutely livid yet uncontrollably laughing at the unreasonable boy in front of her.
Lucifer not knowing why Luna was laughing, smiled. He truly loved her and seeing her roll on the ground cussing while laughing made him incomparably pleased and content. It was as if they were back to the days of yesterday, where they could talk, play, and enjoy each other's company.
“Come Luna. Tell me how to form my Beast Mana Core. After that I have a plan.” Lucifer spoke with a cheshire smile.
“Fine you idiot, I'll tell you how. First forget everything you think you know about Mana and the Elements you have.” Luna instructed with a roll of her eyes, but still spoke with mock anger towards the smiling hybrid. “Ok, what are your Elements?”
“They are Light and Dark?” Lucifer answered confused. Luna knew his Elements, why did she have to ask him?
“True but also wrong. They are your connection to Gaies. Light is what allows every being to wake from the rest of Dark and see the world around them through the darkness. Dark is what allows all beings to rest and bring an end to Light’s light. Your so called Element, is just the ability to connect with Gaies’ Light and Dark.” Luna spoke cryptically, as if she was speaking of the most secret of things. “So what are your Elements Lucifer?”
“No fucking clue now Miss Mysterious Teacher.” Lucifer chortled as he threw a sly glance towards his lupin sister. He truly did not understand what the whole speech she just spoke meant, but he was keen to learn.
“Idiot lizard giant.” Luna huffed with annoyance. “Your Elements are the Light and Dark of Gaies! How you two-legs possibly survive with your weird conceptions of the Elements and Mana is beyond me.”
“Well we are not all blessed with inherited memories.” Retorted the peeved Lucifer at Luna's snarky comment.
“Ok fine let me continue. You can use the power of Gaies. That is Mana, all Mana comes from Gaies and we can only take it and use it ourselves for a time. Death is our due date to return the Mana. When we take Mana from Gaies, it regresses. It becomes diluted by our bodies and this is why two-legs have to slowly increase their Mana’s Purity. Beasts are made by Gaies and not Gods so we do not have to increase our Mana Purity. That is why Beasts are categorized into Orders. And the Size of our Core is equivalent to our Rank.”
“That's great and all but how does that mean anything to me? I am technically made by Gods so how can I create a Beast Mana Core? You even said that Beasts don't increase their Mana Purity so will I end up as a Mid Order Beast forever?” Lucifer inquired with apprehension at the sudden influx of information. If what he surmised from Luna's lecture as true then it was a very likely scenario, if he cultivated a Beast Core.
“This is where you are special. You are not made by Gods. Your ancestors are made by Gods and Gaies. Dragons and draconians have a thin line separating them, so you can use both Beast and two-leg methods. You can connect directly with Gaies and use its power like we Beasts do and you can grow in power like two-legs do!”
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