《Re:Direction The Peak (Cultivation Tale)》CH. 339
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Ame saw that Jin was listening and continued: "I picked Fire. Pure fire. Not some kind of subsection, just 'fire'. Let me tell you, it was painful. I truly felt what fire was. How it burns, it melts and ultimately destroys in its own way..."
She shivered as she added: "I don't even want to recall those horrifying moments..."
Jin could understand her. He would rather forget all that he experienced too. It had been...yeah, there were no words that could describe what he had to endure.
Ame sighed and continued: "Anyways, there is one big difference between those elements and the unclassified. Do you know what it is?"
Jin knew. He learnt about it long ago and read more on the topic as the years went by. He could swear he did read a lot about it within the previous lives too but he still could not recall any of it. Even though he could recall himself reading...
Ame stated: "Tangibility"
The five origins could be seen with one's eyes. The two glorious impacted one's sight. As for the four beyond, one would witness them and their impact through his life.
As for the unclassified? They would not be seen but felt instead.
Ame added: "It's quite simple if you think about it. The ones you see will affect your physicality while the others...well...You probably already know it and better than me"
He chuckled sadly. She was right. He felt it indeed.
FEAR.
It was impossible to describe it to someone else. Only experiencing it could truly open one's eyes to what it really is. Jin had no plans to even try to explain it to her. She would never be able to understand it...Because he would never be able to express it. Not with words.
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If he use of the element within his core though... But he did not want to. He never used it against her and never would. It was too horrific.
He used it many times throughout his many lives.
It was not something you would wish to happen to anyone.
Ame was unperturbed by Jin's momentary loss of focus and continued: "There is a common ending to all those trying to fuse with an unclassified element. They kill themselves. At the very least, I have never heard of anyone with such a core element being alive"
Jin chuckled.
Of course, there would not be anyone. If they were truly deprived of their sense of self and reality... Not many people would be able to endure that. And even the greatest would probably fail after some time. He failed as well. Many times. The number fo times he killed himself was...Too high.
Honestly, if not for the appearance of that weird handsome youth, he might have killed himself right at the reset in this life. Or lived in a mad way until he died. It did wake the last bit of sanity he had left in him. That bit that he thought he no longer had.
Ame was gazing straight at Jin. She was truly fearing for his life right now. Attempting to fuse with an unclassified was not a joke. She did not want to see him die or go mad and die. She...She had opened herself to this guy and treasured their friendship. He was the only one she could depend on in this world at the moment.
She was concerned.
She told him explicitly: "If you need anything, tell me. I will do my best to help you"
Jin laughed at the seriousness of her tone and joked: "How about some Frone first to celebrate my breakthrough?"
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She chuckled and nodded as she went to help him up.
They both left the library and went towards Jin's closest restaurant. The luxurious one. As they walked, Jin said seriously: "I do need your help though"
Ame stopped her steps for a second before continuing. She asked: "What do you need?"
Jin breathed in and stated: "Knowledge. I need everything related to the Unclassified you can find"
Ame nodded. She said: "I will go to the Palace and search the library there then. You should ask your managers to help as well"
Jin planned to do exactly that on his side of things. As for the Palace library...He had been there many times and knew all of the books within. Or so it was supposed to be. Considering what happened when he entered his, it was possible that he actually did not know any of the books within the Palace as well.
It did not hurt to have Ame try and search there.
If she brought even one book he did not know, he would go there himself too. For now, he planned to take it slow and check his own place. Also, he planned to start a book of his own in which he would write down all the discrepancies between his memories and this life.
The key to saving his sanity was likely somewhere there.
Or a way to prove that it was still not reality yet.
Still, there had to be something that could be done.
...
After they ate and drank, Ame left for the Palace. She was a bit reluctant to leave Jin alone, fearing that he might end himself or something...But he managed to reassure her.
He went back to his own library and, instead of searching specifically for Fear, he searched for anything related to the Unclassified.
He found a few books and immersed himself within his lecture for hours.
Until he stumbled upon a single sentence within one of the books: "The illusion will always seem real to the one who made it however what is needed is to make it seem real to the targets"
That book was titled as [The right way to use illusions] and gave advices on to use Illusions and incorporate them into one's fighting style. While the majority of the book was useful but unrelated to his existential crisis, this sentence was the answer he had been looking for.
At least, it was a clue and a lead.
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