“Are-are you sure this is a good idea, Scott?” Amber asked nervously as the necromancer completed the last circle on the floor. The curtains had been drawn, and black candles had been arranged around the ritual circle. She shivered at the sight of it.

“It’s not a good idea, it’s the best idea!” Scott replied, dusting his hands off. The candles made strange, sinister shadows dance on his skull, eyelights glowing ominously. “Trust me, this’ll work. They’ll die with everything else if Azathoth stops dreaming.”

“O-Okay.” Now that she had an actual understanding of magic, she could see just how vile the sigils he’d inscribed truly were. They spoke of madness, and darkness, and pain. Scott double-checked the Necronomicon, nodded, and began to chant.

“Alzahmed, den, athlathakin. C’etous, in’a bakagauan et spirtous almehd houn. Alzahmed, den, athlathakin. C’etous, in’a bakagauan et spirtous almehd houn. Alzahmed, den, athlathakin.” The air vibrated, and the room began to shake and tremble. “C’etous, in’a bakagauan et spirtous almehd houn. Alzahmed, den, athlathakin. C’etous, in’a bakagauan et spirtous almehd houn! Come! I call you, by my power, come! Webxeneus!”

The candles flickered, snuffing out into a darkness greater than mere absence of light. A foul, charnel smell emanated from the circle as it began to glow a bloody crimson red. A dark yellow shape rose form the center of the diagram, barely repressed demonic giggling coming from below its’ sharp blazing red eyes. Amber trembled. It was terrifying summoning a daemon again, even with her new strength.

“Who calls the great daemon Webxeneus, Render of Flesh and Spiller of Blood? Who has called forth wisdom beyond the sages, evil beyond the blackest of hearts? Who has-” Suddenly, the daemon stopped, blinking his glowing eyes, then narrowed them as he saw his summoner. “You.”

Abruptly, the glow faded, the darkness receded, and the daemon zipped back through the circle.

“Huh?” Scott said, cocking his head. He shared a confused glance with Amber.

“Is-is that supposed to happen?” she asked.

“No. I didn’t even know they could refuse a summons like that.” he said. He relit the candles, checked that the circle and spell were right, and tried again.

“Alzahmed, den, athlathakin. C’etous, in’a bakagauan et spirtous almehd houn. Alzahmed, den, athlathakin. C’etous, in’a bakagauan et spirtous almehd houn. Alzahmed, den, athlathakin. C’etous, in’a bakagauan et spirtous almehd houn. Alzahmed, den, athlathakin. C’etous, in’a bakagauan et spirtous almehd houn! Come! I call you, by my power, come! Webxeneus!”

This time, not even a flicker. It felt like he was making a call straight to voicemail.

He tried again, with the name of a different daemon. Nothing. A different one. Nothing. Again, and again, and again, nothing at all.

“This’s ridiculous. Why won’t they come? A daemon always answers a summons, no matter what! It’s part of their whole deal!”

“Maybe you’re doing it wrong?” Amber offered. Scott didn’t even dignify that with a remark.

“Hold on, I’m gonna see if something else’ll work.” he said and stomped off, annoyed.

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“Alzahmed, den, athlathakin. C’etous, in’a bakagauan et spirtous almehd houn. Alzahmed, den, athlathakin. C’etous, in’a bakagauan et spirtous almehd houn. Alzahmed, den, athlathakin. C’etous, in’a bakagauan et spirtous almehd houn. Alzahmed, den, athlathakin. C’etous, in’a bakagauan et spirtous almehd houn! Come! I call you, by my power, come! Webzanus!”

“Webxeneus, not Webzanus.” Scott corrected, and the nine year old nodded.

“Come forth!” Riley clapped her hands, and the circle glowed, the lights faded, and the bald, horned, dark yellow daemon rose again, starting into his shtick.

“Who has-”

“Hi there.” Scott said. Webxeneus’s eyes widened, and he dove back into the dimensional rift. “Oh no you don’t!”

Tarantulas dropped down from the ceiling, covering the daemon’s face, gripping with its’ claws and chittering with all its’ heads.

“Ah! Get off, get off!” The daemon flailed around in the circle, bumping off the edges as he tried to remove the undead abomination.

“Are we sure they can help?” Amber deadpanned. Eventually he tore Tarantulas off his face and flung him away, seething.

“You…dare…” he growled.

“Well, you keep trying to run away! What was I supposed to do?” Scott said unapologetic.

“You will never have a contract with-” Webxeneus began, but Scott cut him off.

“Ah-ah ah, I wasn’t the one who summoned you.” he said, wagging a finger. “She was.” He pointed at Riley, who smiled and waved cheerfully.

“Hi!”

Webxeneus’s glaring eyes narrowed, the left twitching dangerously, but she truly was his summoner.

“I…I see.” he said, trying to regain control of the situation. He cleared his raspy throat and folded his wings back like a cape. “S-So. Despite your age, you have summoned me. What is your bidding, mistress?” the daemon said, bowing low in a show of humility.

“Hey, got a quick question. Why’d you run away when I called you?” Scott asked. Webxeneus wheeled on him furiously.

“You! After what you’ve done, there will never be another contract with you again! You are responsible for the death of Hastazemous!” Scott stared blankly at him, his jaw dropping.

“Holy crap-I’m blacklisted!?”

“Yes!” They all stared at Scott, who put a hand on his chin, removed it to speak, then replaced it as he fell silent again.

“I mean…I mean-wow. I never thought, I didn’t even know…wow. I’m, huh. I’m a little proud of myself for that.” he said.

“Exactly why no daemon will ever deal with you again!” Webxeneus thundered, then turned back to Riley. “What is your bidding, my mistress? You have called me to serve, and serve I shall.”

“Oh, you can deal with him. I’m out.” Riley said, walking to the door. “Bye Mr. Daemon!” He stared after her. Not in all his thousands upon thousands of years had Webxeneus experienced someone calling him then just…walking away. He turned, slackjawed to Scott, unused to this feeling of dismissal.

“Welp, you heard the lady. Let’s talk.” Scott said, his demeanor turning serious. Webxeneus snorted.

“As if, wretch. She and I never entered into a bargain, and if she does not negotiate I cannot either.” He turned and prepared to sink into the middle of the circle.

“Even if it involves waking Azathoth?” Scott said calmly. Amber watched as the daemon flinched, turning to him slowly, like a robot.

“What-What did you say?”

“I said that’s what’s going on right now. Now ordinarily, I’d have nothing to do with your kind ever again. But I believe the complete destruction of everything warrants daemonic intervention.” Webxeneus stared into the skeleton’s eyelights. He knew there was no joking about this.

“This…is true, then.” he said. Scott nodded. “Very well. Why have you turned to us in this matter? There are others more…suitable, in a situation of this nature.”

“You think I haven’t? I’m getting everyone I can to help stop this. If Delacroix’s plan goes off you get offed too, and he’s using daemonic help to do it.” Scott said. Webxeneus’s eyes narrowed.

“I SEE.” He was quiet for a moment. “Unfortunately, I am only a middle-ranked daemon. I cannot alleviate a problem of this magnitude on my own, but I can alert those higher up. Will you allow me to do so?” Amber wondered to herself if he had higher-ups, or lower-downs.

“Go ahead. Just don’t take too long.” Scott said.

“Rest assured, there will be great haste.” Webxeneus vanished, and the normal lighting returned. Scott crossed his arms, waiting.

“Do we really want to get them involved in this?” Amber asked.

“Want? No. Need? Oh yes. One of their own’s trying to end them, you can bet they’ll be salty about that.” Scott said. Amber nodded.

“Yeah, I guess. Will they get back to us today or-”

A small pillar of flame shot from the center of the circle. Out stepped an aged blonde gentleman in an exquisite suit, carrying an elegant, silver-tipped cane. Immaculately tailored and precise, with no wasted motion he looked them both over and bowed at the waist.

“Good evening, Miss Harris, Mr. Havenbrook. I have been informed that there is a matter that requires urgent attention. I am the Prince of Hell, the archdaemon Mephistopheles. May I please kindly be allowed out of the circle?” he asked politely.

“Sure.” Scott said, smudging the chalk with a boot.

“Scott!” Amber cried in alarm. The skeleton and daemon both stared at her.

“Don’t worry, Amber. He needs to work here, I gotta give him free reign. He’s not stupid enough to do anything with so much at stake. Join me at the desk.” Scott said, taking his seat.

“Your beau speaks the truth, fair mademoiselle. I shall not harm even a hair on any of you. Indeed, that is why it is often I who am sent to negotiate affairs such as these. Please, a token of peace.” He held out a bouquet of gorgeous red roses to her, fragrant and elegant, perfectly cultivated.

“Um, t-thank you.” she said, but as he turned she quickly set them down and moved away.

“So.” Mephistopheles said, draping himself over a chair with careless ease and somehow complete professionalism. “I have heard from my subordinates that someone is attempting to stop the Daemon Sultan from dreaming. I require more information before I feel comfortable acting, however. This is a matter of grave import.”

“You’re telling me. I’ve already died to these guys before. The man who’s instigating this is Desmond Delacroix, head of Metatech Pharmaceuticals. However, I suspect he’s just a puppet for the true mastermind, the Calamitous Ruination.” Scott explained. Mephistopheles raised an eyebrow.

“The Last Alarm? He has resurfaced? I thought him banished, for good.” he said.

“You know about him?” Amber asked.

“Indeed, my dear. He’s rather infamous. In ages long since passed, the Serpent attempted to cause dimensional collapse in order to reach the center of the universe, which is locked to nearly all, save from the Outer Gods. His desire was to wake the Blind Idiot before. Fortunately, other powers managed to stop him before anything truly dreadful happened. It resulted on the downfall of Atlantis. We daemons were involved only tangentially, being summoned to battle his minions, but even we do not wish to cease existing, no matter how awful our innate conditions are.” he said, sniffing disdainfully at the thought of his compatriots.

“You seem presentable enough, not like the other daemons.” Amber said.

“Hastazemus was powerful, yes. But far too uncouth and coarse to be considered one of the true archdaemon elite. I am much more refined, as befitting one of my position.” he said primly.

“And exactly what type of position is that?” Amber asked. Mephistopheles smiled devilishly.

“Commanding from high up, naturally. As befits someone of taste and power.”

“Yeah yeah, daemons are great and you’re the best of the best. So what can you bring to the table here?” Scott said, losing patience.

“Hmm. In this matter, I can bring much. Though I rule over only an eighth of our dimension, once I confer with the other daemon lords it should be simple to ensure their cooperation. Now then, you said one of our own was working with Mr. Delacroix? Hmm.” He snapped his fingers, and an imp flew out of the circle, holding a file. As he took it, the imp bowed and disappeared in a flash of fire.

“Let’s see, Delacroix, Delacroix…ah, here he is. Yes, he made a deal with Mephitomonagnarious some years ago. Hmm. Unrestricted servitude, in return for the barrier between this dimension and ours erased. Not the first time we’ve been promised that, but his credentials were excellent, so the deal was accepted. Mephitomonagnarious seems to be working diligently, and has no prior record of rebellion, nor any inclination to either it or nihilism, if I may say so.” the daemons said.

“How do you know? He’s pretty strong and seemed pretty crafty, he could be hiding it.” Scott said. Mephistopheles smiled thinly and chuckled.

“Because I’ve know the lad all his life. He’s actually my great-nephew, my sister is a succubus. I can say with authority he is most likely unaware of Delacroix’s true goal, if that’s the case.” He closed the folder and it burned away. “It shouldn’t take but a moment to contact him.” He traced an evil-looking glowing circle in the air with his fingertip, forming a pentagram with obscene sigils that made both Scott and Amber shiver with unease. “Hmm? Hello? Mephitomonagnarious, are you-?”

There was a mighty crack and Mephistopheles was blown out of his chair, sending him slamming into the wall upside down with incredible force, landing on the floor in an undignified sprawl. All three of them gaped at the glowing neon pink eye sealing the circle off, then it vanished.

“I don’t think he’s taking calls right now.” Amber deadpanned.

“This-insolence! The absurdity of it!” Mephistopheles thundered, standing up and fixing his suit. “The Poisonous Thoughts has cut off all forms of magical communication! We’re blind in there!”

“Crap. That’s not good.” Scott muttered, thinking. Mephistopheles returned to the table, a great deal more agitated.

“Mr. Havenbrook, I find myself forced into an allegiance with you, despite your…history with our kind. To be frank, I was impressed with your performance. I can respect skill and ingenuity, even in a foe. We will require both, and sadly lack such intelligence in great numbers on our side.” he said. Scott shrugged.

“What can you do? Genius is hard to come by.”

“I would settle for even subpar brainpower.” Mephistopheles growled. “Regardless, I offer you these terms. I can guarantee you the full might of all of our resources, should you allow us into this realm. All we ask in return are a mere few trifles, and we shall ally and quash this threat.”

“No dice.” Scott said immediately. Mephistopheles blinked.

“What?”

“I said no way. A few trifles? Hah. We don’t have time for games, man. Either you’re in, or you’re out, no weaseling. Help us and you go back to the pit where you came from, or be erased. I will accept no other offers. Do we have a deal?” Scott put his chin on his fist, glaring at the daemon with toxic emerald light. Mephistopheles turned his lips up in a thin, cruel smile.

“And if you’ll remember, Mr. Havenbrook, it was you that released me from the circle. Do you know how much freedom that grants me?” he said sinisterly. Scott shrugged.

“I honestly don’t care. Go ahead, slaughter every single one of us. Crack open the barrier of reality. How long do you think you’ll rule? Sixteen hours? Doesn’t seem that great to me. And I hoped for someone who so vaunted intelligence, you’d be a little smarter than that yourself.”

They stared at each other, gold versus green. Mephistopheles chuckled.

“You drive a hard bargain, Mr. Havenbrook. Alas, I am a daemon, and must give at least a token effort. What do you require?”

“Can you teleport my ship and three million zombies to Delacroix’s location in Australia? I don’t know where it is.” he said, and Mephistopheles paused.

“You do ask for the sky, Mr. Havenbrook.” Scott grinned. “It is…possible, but will be…difficult. Even for one of my power, I’m not sure that I can-”

“I’m not done. I also need as many warriors, warbeasts, and archlords as well as any allies you can wrangle. You didn’t think I wouldn’t be opening the barrier between our dimensions, did you?” Mephistopheles paused again, narrowing his yellow eyes but giving him a thin smile.

“I see. Perchance were you a daemon in your previous life? You make a very juicy offer, but it will not profit us in the end.” he said. Scott shrugged.

“Well, you get to keep living. Sounds good to me.”

“Indeed. If you’d be interested, would you consider an offer of conversion from lowly mortalhood to daemonhood? I feel you’d make a good one, and you’d easily come back to life.” Mephistopheles offered, smiling.

“Sorry, I got other plans. I’d never make a deal with you scumsuckers if I didn’t have to again!” Scott said, eyelights bright. They both laughed uproariously while Amber wiped off her brow. The tension was loosening.

“Very well, Mr. Havenbrook. I find we must strike an accord. But, we have to make it official.” He stuck out his hand.

“One job, everyone clears out after, no one does anything else?” Scott asked, clarifying.

“Mr. Havenbrook, I never break a bargain.”

“I know. But I know how you can twist and weasel that bargain. You’ll leave this dimension alone.”

“Wouldn’t dream otherwise. We have a large stake in this too.” Mephistopheles said. Scott nodded.

Bones met daemonic flesh and shook. A flash of fire tossed out the contract, which Scott snatched out of the air.

“I’ll hold onto this.” he said, pocketing it.

“Very well. Just call my name, and I shall appear. We will be ready by sundown.” With a bow, he vanished and Amber finally relaxed.

“Whew. He was creepy.” she said, sitting on the desk.

“Yeah, but he’s one of the best. He’ll do what he says.” Scott leaned back, hand on his head. “I guess we just get ready ‘til then. Can you help me prepare to crack open a hole in reality?”

“Sure. Happy to help.” she said dully. How ironic that she had to help the daemons now. Scott sighed, commiserating. He also looked her over, slouched on his desk.

“By the way, you get that suit from Cross? Looks the same.”

“Yeah?” she said. Scott nodded approvingly.

“You keeping it? It’s kinda doing it for me.” he said, grinning. She sighed and smacked his bulbous skull.

“Don’t be a perv. We’ve got work to do.” She stood up and went to the closet to retrieve supplies, but glanced back at him. “Just so you know, the suit was a write-off. Just a spare, they told me to keep it.” She smiled as his eyelights grew brighter.

“Gotcha. Oh, watch out-!”

“Yaaaaaah!” She screamed as Tarantulas, Arnold Palmer, and Bones stood there holding out supplies, the rat-headed monstrosity sitting comfortably and extending its’ necks to offer bags form Bones’ ribcage. She slammed the door and shot Scott a dirty look.

“Sorry.”