《They said I could become anything so I became a _____!!!》Chapter 50: FIRE!!!

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Both me and Gret turned around at the same time when we smelled the smoke. What met us was the camp fire, two meter high and a meter wide, and beside it sat Philomena laughing. At what? Well at Leo of course. I don’t know how or why, but somehow she had put him on fire. Leo himself were throwing of his burning clothes. When he throws them on the ground I fire a water beam too take out the fire.

For a second Leo just stands there, panting, while staring at his clothes before he turns around and face Philomena.

“What in the heavenly mothers name are you doing!?!?”he shouted. No, more like roaring. I’ve never seen him without his usual pokerface, so this is new for me. I wish I had some popcorn.

“It’s just a prank! Hahaha!” Philomena exclaimed while holding her tummy, laughing like crazy. “The old “surprise fire” never fails to ‘lighten’ up the mood! Ahahaha!”

“A prank!? You almost put my whole body on fire!!!”. Philomena continues to laugh which causes Leo to unsheat his swords but before he have the chance to attack Gret steps in between them.

“Leo, she didn’t mean to hurt you or anything. She just wanted to make us laugh” he say in a calm voice, as if he is a father calming down his child.

“She is dangerous and insane!! She will get us killed! I should-!!”

“Enough!!!” Gret shouts, his eyes turning red for a second, causing even Philomena to stop laughing. Leo stares at Gret with eyes full of anger before putting his swords back.

“I knew this was an bad idea…” he mutters before turning around and picking up the prevously burning, now wet, piece of cloth and walks away to the opposite side of the camp, leaving behind an awkward atmosphere. After a few seconds Gret sighs and lumps down on the ground.

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“Sorry you had to see that side of me, I know it’s unsightly. And I also wanna apologize on Leos behalf. But Phi, please, refrain from pulling pranks like that on him. He still hates fire”.

……………….…………………………………

It’s time for dinner and everyone, except for Leo, are sitting around the camp fire.

“Let’s eat!” Bastion exclaims, smiling.

He starts pouring some stew into his bowl but when he notices that none other than him seems hungry he puts it down. “Phi, what did you do now?”

“Nothing!” Philomena exclaims. “Ok maybe I did something but why did you immediately blame me!?”

“Phi, it’s always you” Bastion says in a calm voice. This causes Philomenas face to become red like a tomato.

“Why you-!?”. Philomena starts firing fireballs towards Bastion but he avoids them with ease. I try to stand up but Gret stops me.

“It’s ok, just let them go at it” he says.

“A-are you sure?”

“Yeah, they used to fight a lot but they always solve it at the end”

“Oh, ok then” I say and sit down. Together we watch the splendid spectacle that unfolds before us. Philomenas fire seems almost alive the way it twists and turns. It reminds me of a snake. Meanwhile Bastion moves as if he is dancing. It’s beautiful.

“Hey Ruth, can I ask you for a favor?” Gret suddenly says.

“Uhm, sure” I answer with slight suspicion in my voice.

“Leo seems to still be pretty mad at me so could you please bring him some food?”

BZZT! WRONG! I don’t know if you noticed, but I am preeetty sure Leo dislikes me. So the answer is n- don’t look at me like that Gret. It’s not my fault he disliles me. Stop it! Sigh, ok then, I guess I can give it a try. Who knew a grown man could use puppy eyes with such efficiency?

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I fill a bowl with stew and heads towards the direction I last saw Leo go to.

“Mistress really is kind! Bringing food to the youngster that have treated you with such coldness!” Rowan exclaims. Please stop it, I’m not doing this for him. “Such kindness, I wouldn’t expect anything less from mistress!”. Please, you make me feel bad.

“What are you doing here?” a cold voice suddenly calls out. It startels me, cajsing me to nearly drop the bowl. I direct my gaze towards the location the voice came from.

On top of a tall stone pillar sits Leo. He’s staring at me and his eyes seems to be glowing.

For a second I am dumbfounded and forget why I am here but then I remember.

“Gret asked me to bring you food” I say and show him the bowl.

“I’m not hungry” he simply says and looks away.

“Such impudence! Mistress brings you food and you deny it!? Pay with your life!”

“Calm down blockhead!” Morgana hisses. “You’re annoying!”

“But when mistress is kind enough to bring him food and he simply ignores it, it’s unforgivable! Right mistress!? Mistress?”

… Not hungry? NOT HUNGRY??? Do you know how expensive food is!? And you just wanna waste it because ‘you’re not hungry’? WASTE FOOD!?!? Oh, you are gonna eat this bowl with stew, even if I have to force it down your throat!

I swiftly jump up on the stone pillar which causes Leo to flinch.

“I said I’m not hu-!!!”

“EAT IT” I say with my darkest voice and hold the bowl centimeters from his face. Leo stare at me with a confused look on his face the it goes red. He takes the bowl from my hands. He stares at it for a while, stares at me, then the bowl, then at me then the bowl and at me again.

“What?” I ask in a slightly irritated tone.

“Do you have a spoon or something?”

… Crap. I forgot.

“I-It’s ok, I don’t need it anyways” Leo says and lifts up a piece of meat. But just as he is about to put it in his mouth I hit it out of his hand.

“What are you doing!?” he shouts.

“Your hands”.

“Huh?”

“Did you clean them?”

“No?”

“Filthy! Unsanitary! Disgusting!” I shout.

“What are you talking about?”

“If you touch your food with dirty hands you can get sick! Dirt will get into it and make it’s way into your stomach!”

“Then what should I do?”

“Wash your hands!” I exclaim and fire a water beam at him,

“Wait a sec- Bluargahrha(sound of drowning)!!!” Please don’t hate me for this Leo-kun. Some may call this extreme but I am very conscious about stuff like this. Blame my dad, he scared me into it. “If you don’t wash your hands you will get diarrhea!” he always used to say. I wonder if he ever experienced it first hand?

Hmm? Am I forgetting something?

“Blarguarhg!!!”

Oh that’s right! Silly me! Ohohoho! I turn of the water beam and stare at Leo. No, he looks more like a very displeased, soaked kitten. His whole body is dripping with water and his hair and sugoi cat ears lays flat against his head. Seems like I missed~~~ From the Storage I can hear Morgana laughing like crazy.

“Refreshing, isn’t it?” I say.

“...”

If stares could kill I would be undead by now. But hey, at least the dirt is gone! Right? Now you can continue eati-Oh. I forgot about that. Guess I should have taken the bowl before I started shooting water at him because now the stew is gone. Washed away with the water I guess. Crap. I hate waisting perfectly fine food.

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