(Zack)

"I think the blackout rages are caused by the scars on my Sacred Crystal," I tell Nik, Gold, and Theodore my new suspicion.

"It's easy to blame other things-" Nik begins.

"No, Nik," I say. "I'm serious. Before the scars, I never had a blackout rage. Twice since then, I have. It's possible that beginning to awaken my Divine Heritage, combined with those scars, is causing them. First with Bryce's death, then last night, with the harm nearly brought to Gold. Think about it – every other time I got angry, I was in control. Except for those two incidents, every single time."

"Both of those times," Nik says. "Someone you cared about was in danger. Someone you cared about deeply. A person had threatened them."

"Maybe," I say. "But what about with the Nian? Gold could've died then, too. I didn't go into a blackout rage."

"Probably because it was a monster," Nik says. "Rather than a person."

"No," I shake my head. "I mean, it could be because of that, but when you think about it, I've been furious a lot. I've removed hands, for the Crystals' sake. I also blacked out when I was in serious danger, back with when I turned into a Dragon – I don't remember that at all."

"Wait," Theodore looks at Nik in shock. "He actually turned into one? You weren't screwing with us?"

"No," Nik says. "We weren't. Zack, I know you want to blame it on something else, but the fact of the matter is that you have a temper that-"

"I have a temper," I say. "I've always had a temper. But I never blacked out because of it before, not even in reality."

"How would you-" Nik begins, then his eyes widen. "The oath you made us swear – you remember?"

"Everything," I state. "And there's someone in reality that I cared about a whole lot more than Gold, and I saw him get beaten quite a lot. Trust me, this is a new thing."

Gold seems really upset, ready to cry.

"Gold," I turn to him. "I care about you a lot. This other person, I've known them pretty much their entire life, and they're like a little brother to me. I mean, you are, too, and I care about you a lot, but I care about him even more. Please don't be upset, it's just… the way it is, okay? I can't help it. But I do care about you a lot."

He still looks ready to cry, so I pull him into a hug, and he mentally freaks out.

"It's okay, Gold," I reassure him. "I care about you. Think of it like how you care about me and your brother. It's a different kind of care, and different level. You care and like your brother a lot more than me, right?"

He calms down when I mention that, reluctantly agreeing that he cares about his brother more than me. I release him, then wipe the tears that had formed in his eyes, before patting him on the head.

"Who all knows?" Nik asks me.

"About it possibly being the scars?" I ask. "Just you three? I just had the thought while waiting for you to arrive."

"I mean about you remembering."

"Oh, that," I say. "Big Flame and Big S know for sure, and I think Big C and Big Breeze do. Not sure about the rest."

"And the non-Crystals?"

"You three and Bryce."

"Bryce knew?" Nik asks.

"He figured it out," I shrug. "And considering we're half-brothers, I sometimes wonder if he remembered, too."

It would be one way of explaining how he figured out I remembered, after all, even if he didn't know we were brothers. I never saw any indication that he remembered, though, and nor do my memories show any.

So it's a mystery until I die, I suppose. Once I do, though, I'm going to ask him straight-up if he remembered. Then knock him over the head if he did, just for not telling me or letting me know.

First, though, I have to become a lot more powerful, train up my team, win a massive battle, kill a Dragon or more, avenge his death, and eventually, kill the Shadow of Life.

Only then will I be allowed to die, because there's no way I'm leaving this life without having done so.

Before I can do all of that, though, I have to figure out if it really is my Crystal's scarring that's causing these blackouts. Nik, Theodore, and I discuss the possibility, especially now that they're aware – even if a little disbelieving – that it could be from that.

"I'm going to do something," I tell them after a bit, thinking of a possibility while discussing my own Sacred Crystal. "That's going to cause me to vanish from here. Presumably, I'm going to return to the same spot, so please don't come here. I'll probably be in a different spot if you do, though, so don't worry about that too much. I don't know how long I'll be gone."

"Why?" Nik asks. "You can't use Teleport, so-"

"It's not a Skill," I state. "It's… something else."

Inhaling, I focus on my Sacred Crystal, then slowly exhale as I pull on one of the connections it possesses, closing my eyes as I do so. The shift in the air and the difference in what I'm hearing confirms I've arrived, though I keep my eyes shut.

"It's safe," Big Breeze tells me after a few minutes, and I open my eyes to find him standing in front of me in his avatar, giving me a curious look. The tilt of his head reminds me of Gold, and I nearly laugh. "What brings you here, Zack?"

"Twice since arriving here in the Boundary," I say. "I've had a blackout rage, which… isn't normal. I'm kind of scared of what'll happen if it keeps happening."

"Shit happens," he shrugs, and I raise an eyebrow. "What? Sacred beings can't swear? Trust me, you should hear Big S when he gets grumpy. Boy does he have a potty-mouth."

I giggle at the thought of Big S swearing up a storm because someone interrupted his pervy dreams.

"No," I calm down. "I mean… I'm worried that it's a sign of something more serious, and if it had to do with the injuries to my Sacred Crystal – the scars on my inner Crystal."

"Ah," he says, thinking for a few moments, then nodding as he comes to a conclusion. "Bare your torso."

"What?" I ask.

"Bare your-" he starts. "Oh. You're already shirtless."

I roll my eyes.

"Why did you want me shirtless?"

"I need you to be so I can actually see your Sacred Crystal," he tells me. "Stay standing in that spot."

He begins slowly walking around me, poking me every now and then. While most of the pokes are probably him assessing my inner Crystal, I'm pretty sure some of the pokes at my ribs and sides are to see if I'm ticklish.

I'm not.

For several minutes, he continues to walk around me, and I can sense something happening to my Sacred Crystal as he does. Closing my eyes, I focus inward, and stumble away from him the moment I do.

Hooooly fuck!

"What's wrong?" Big Breeze asks.

"Um," I say. "I looked inward, and wasn't exactly expecting that."

"You can sense your inner Crystal?" He asks, and I raise an eyebrow. "Right, that's how you knew about the scars in the first place. Um… yeah. Sorry, that was probably weird for you, wasn't it?"

"Very weird," I say. "I… don't even know what that was."

"That was me," he answers. "I was scanning your Crystal. Mind if I resume?"

That was pretty disturbing, and the more I sensed it, the worse the feeling got. But if it can help with the situation… then it needs to happen.

"Yeah," I nod. "Go ahead and continue."

I resume a natural stance, and Big Breeze returns to walking around me. Closing my eyes, I look inward once more, watching as a sort of purple light moves around my crystal, brushing against the scars and other parts every time Big Breeze pokes me.

That's what I'm sensing, and it's weird. It's even worse when he touches a scar, and part of me wants to recoil, to push him away and stop him from doing that. I trust him, though, and let him continue, now that I'm prepared.

I'm not sure how long passes before he finishes, but when he does, I drop to the ground, exhausted. Whatever he did, it exhausted me, and even he looks weary from it. He looks at me for a few moments, then takes a seat. Is it me, or is he pale?

Not from the light, but actually pale?

"Are you okay?" I ask.

"Yeah," he nods. "That's just exhausting. Even as powerful as I am now, it's generally not a good idea to do such a thing. My body's not mortal anymore, either, which leaves me vulnerable while I'm doing that. Zack – if anyone other than one of us Crystals does that, immediately shut them out and get away."

His body isn't mortal anymore? There's a difference, for a giant, floating chunk of magical crystal? What was it like for that to be mortal?

"Scan me?"

"I wasn't just scanning you," he says. "I was interacting with your inner Crystal. Had I any malice, I could have ended you or killed you. That's part of why the Blood Scar is so dangerous – because your Sacred Crystal is a part of you. The Blood Scar is one way of directly attacking it."

He sighs.

"The art of Crystal Magic is long lost," he says. "And it's not exactly something the nine of us can teach you, not since the creation of the Boundaries."

The Sacred Crystals predate the Boundaries? I thought they came from its creation?

"What, exactly, are you?" I ask.

"We're not allowed to tell," he says, and I fold my arms over my chest. "I'm sorry, Zack, but we aren't. The knowledge of what we are, how the Boundaries came to be, and how they bind the Shadow of Life and his team-"

He cuts off as he realizes what he said, and I just raise an eyebrow, keeping my gaze fixed on him until he sighs.

"Please, don't push me," he says. "The only one of those four we have to worry about is Alexander himself. There are four prisons, and we use the Boundaries to keep them sealed. Alexander's the only one able to actually influence outside of them."

"But the nine of you," I say. "You come from before the Boundaries?"

"Yes," he answers. "You know the story that Chaos told you about Alex and the children?"

"Yes," I respond, then realize what he's saying. "You mean that the Boundaries are the seals that were forged?"

"Yes," he answers.

"And the kid used the nine of you to power them," I say. "That's why you're connected to them."

"Yeah," he nods. "The nine of us are linked into the Boundaries in order to ensure they remain stable and the seals they represent remain active. The only way Alexander can possibly get free is if someone opened a hole in the Boundaries into reality."

"But not his prison?" I ask.

"His prison is woven into the Boundaries themselves," Big Breeze shakes his head. "That's why he's able to influence things within. If both Temples of the Elements of one of them were to be turned off, then he'd be able to simply slip out of his prison and into reality. I really shouldn't tell you more, especially with how easy it can be for you to make connections."

They believe that revealing too much to me can cause me to know something that even I shouldn't know. Is that because they think I might give in to the darkness? Or because they don't want anyone to know it?

What is it?

"You know you're only making me curious, right?" I ask.

"Yeah," he admits. "Anyway, Zack, on to the results of… that. Unfortunately, since the art of Crystal Magic is no longer possible due to the existence of the Boundaries, even for a Child of Existence-"

"Why not?"

"Can't tell," he says. "The only way to heal those scars would be through Ascensions."

"Ascensions?"

"Yes," he stands, brushing imaginary dust off of his tunic and butt. I stand as well, giving him an inquisitive look so that he'll continue. "When you Ascend, your soul and your inner Crystal strengthen. Theoretically, that will help you start to mend it. There aren't any Skills that will heal it, but considering who you are, it's possible that you'll forge one."

"Wouldn't that be Crystal Magic?" I ask.

"Blood Scar isn't Crystal Magic," he tells me. "Yet it's able to affect the Crystals. No, it's different. It's more like Sacred Magic."

"And what you were doing," I say. "That was Sacred Magic?"

"That was Crystal Magic," he shakes his head.

"But you said-"

"I'm a giant Crystal," he gives me the 'you're-an-idiot' tone. "Even though it's not possible anymore, that's only for most. As a giant Crystal, I can use it. It's only natural. The reason it can't be used is because we suck it up. It's an innate part of us. Even Alexander can't use it anymore."

Thought you weren't going to tell me?

"Okay," I say. "And these blackout rages – are they caused by the scarring?"

"Yes," he answers. "And, uh, I hate to be the bearer of bad news, but… I'd probably try to Ascend in the next two or three weeks."

"Why?"

"No reason."

"You can't say 'bad news', then not give me a reason."

"You, uh… yeah, just go for Ascension," he tells me. "You really need to get that thing healed. ASAP."

"Big Breeze?"

"Yeah?" He asks.

"One," I say. "What's wrong? Two, if you can use Crystal Magic, can't you heal it?"

"No," he shakes his head. "Because there's a difference between healing an inner Crystal and breaking it. To do the latter, all I'd have to do is hit it like a battering ram. To heal it, I'd have to change its properties – only the one it's of can do that."

Damn.

"Now," I say. "For the first one: what's wrong."

"Oh, just that you could potentially keep blacking out, lose control over yourself, turn into a giant Dragon who's forgotten who he is, and destroy everything in the Boundary if you don't get that thing healed up."

"And I have three weeks before that might happen?" I start to panic. "Fuck!"

"No, no," he hastily waves his hands. "You have about three months. Just… the more frequent blackouts, which will start happening more than just when your emotions enter an extremely heightened state – that's what's triggering them, by the way, not your rage itself – in about three weeks. About two months after that is when your inner Crystal will potentially cause your magics to go haywire, turn you into a Dragon, and cause you to kill everyone in the Boundary and destroy the Boundary itself."

"What… are the odds of that happening?" I ask, and he doesn't respond. "Big Breeze, what are the odds of that?"

"Eighty-seven-point-two-nine percent."

"Of it happening, or it not?"

"Of it happening," He says. "The other twelve-point-six-one percent is simply that your inner Crystal shatters and you die, which will still happen either way."

"So it's either die, or kill everyone, then die?"

"Or die while killing everyone."

"And if I Ascend, that can fix this?" I ask.

"Yes," he hesitates for a moment. "Well, sort of. It can help restore your Sacred Crystal a little bit – help strengthen it. This is only a theoretical situation, since, you know, no one's ever done it before. But it's the only thing Big S and I could agree on regarding it. If it does strengthen the Crystal, you'll probably have a year or more before you need to Ascend again. I'd have to examine you again after you Ascend, though."

Taking a deep breath, I nod.

"Looks like I'll probably end up using some of my Bonus Experience, then," I say. "I'd rather see if that works than not."

"Good luck," he tells me. "And may the gods be with you."