《My Pick Up Artist System》58: Snake D*ckskin escapes from New York
Advertisement
‘So this is what a Marvel vs DC crossover is like…’ Ben’s thoughts teemed with hypothetical matchups.
Meanwhile, milf Black Widow wiped off her breasts with some tissues she pulled out from a hidden pocket.
Seeing those massive tits, Ben shook his head. ‘Almost got lost in the celestial tier...I need to stay on Earth to monitor these twin villains...’
Staring at her rub herself, Ben wondered when Black Widow attained such powers of hypnosis...
Once the milf finished cleaning herself off, she zipped up her leather outfit, sending her breasts back into hiding like supervillains on the run...
Then, Without saying goodbye or even looking at Ben, she turned, preparing to leave.
Realizing the real hero was about to get away, Ben yelled, “Wait! Give me your number!” He stepped forward and shoved his cell phone into her hand in a hurry.
Only giving him a sideways glance, she chuckled, then dialed a number into the phone and handed it back to him.
Ben saved the number, but when he looked back up, she was gone. ‘That’s my move…’
Still, he let out a sigh of relief because he could at least contact her later. ‘Can’t let that one get away. That’s my future wife...’ Then he looked at his phone. “F*CK! This is the number for Domino’s pizza!”
Despite his pants still being down, with an urgency like he saw the bat signal in the sky, Ben waddled out at max penguin-pace.
He searched in every direction for any hint of his savior, but she was nowhere to be found. True heroes didn’t seek appreciation…
Ben stuck out his arm into the darkness, as if grasping for something, something too good to exist on this Earth, something priceless. “Titjob Tina…”
…
That was the name he saved her as in his phone, since she didn’t reveal her true identity… This way, he wouldn’t feel as bad losing to a named boss...
Advertisement
Alas, Ben needed to accept that they were gone—the tits that got away...
He sighed. ‘Happiness cums and goos…’
***
Batman's eyes were determined. 'Our greatest glory is not in never falling, but in rising every time we nut...'
After cleaning himself up, Ben was tip-toeing through the dim corridors. He'd cleaned himself up and was heading back to the exit near the bar. He knew he was getting closer because the volume of the electronic music was decreasing. Still, he had to be careful.
The path wasn't complicated but he didn't want to misstep into another hallway from hell. Half the doorways in this warehouse hid the gaping jaws of giant demons, lying in wait for wandering fools to deliver themselves as food.
Ben walked with a careful pace. ‘Should I look at my points?’ Throughout the night, he received various system alerts but never opened them because he was always occupied or in cornhole danger…
‘No…I can’t risk seeing something there that’ll motivate me into staying here any longer. This is the devil’s anus…I can’t allow his whispers to entice me. In this place, it’s easy to lose control and become a cumtroll… I’ll look at them when I get home.’ Despite his last encounter going well, Ben didn’t forget the terrible things he’d seen, nor ever could he… Suddenly, he stopped. There were people yelling, approaching from behind.
“You call yourself a butt-spelunker?!?”
“What about you? Rectum ranger?!? Hah! You ain’t no Chuck Norris!”
…
‘Accelerate!’ Ben sped up his pace. He was a little worried though. Although he remembered the path back, he wasn’t sure of the surroundings. On the way here, he was too busy staring at the milf’s ass. He only hoped there wouldn’t be too many dangers.
“Batman! It’s you!” someone yelled from Ben’s left.
Advertisement
Ben glanced in the direction of the voice. There stood a grungy room with concrete floors that housed many shirtless men. There was a sign on the wall: “Fist Club.”
...
Several more lines underneath read:
“The first rule of Fist Club is: please talk about Fist Club.”
“The second rule of Fist Club is—” Ben didn’t need to read anymore!
He looked at the man who yelled at him. It was the four-legged demon!
Ben grimaced. ‘Damn, it’s Fart Fist Ace...’
The demon waved him over. “Batman! Come!”
Ben’s face turned green. ‘Batman your granny!’ He skulked away into the shadows.
***
Ben felt like he was in a Cube movie today, with one room worse than the next and no way out. That’s why he hesitated to feel relief when he viewed the new space he entered. This one was clean, at least compared to the other rooms. It had to be, because it was a giant shared shower.
‘It must’ve been off when I passed through before.’ Now, the sound of running water from various faucet-heads permeated the area. The shower area was like one you might see in a sports locker room, with light blue tiles covering the floor and walls, and many people showering. Although Ben couldn’t call it normal civilization, he had to admit it wasn’t as bad as most parts of the house of horrors he experienced so far.
He walked around the edges, trying to pass to the exit on the other side. ‘At least they clean themselves up after.’ Then he got closer. ’That’s not clean at all!’
They were pissing on each other!
These showers were a disguise! The true showers were golden!
Ben almost slipped several times as he sprinted out of there into the next room.
***
"Would you like sumthin' from the gift shop?" A male clerk with many facial piercings and a black leather apron asked Ben.
This was the next area, the last before the exit. One could argue it was the ideal place for a gift shop.
However, Ben squinted. He didn't expect such a shop to be here. "There's a gift shop? Do you have postcards?"
"All we have is dildos."
…
The clerk pointed to the wall behind him. "We got all the new models:
Armadildo…
The Donald Pump…
That’s the one with Mr. President’s head as the mushroom tip…
Of course, there’s the Shrek Dildo…the dildo with the heart of gold…”
…
After rambling a while, the clerk turned back around. That’s when he realized he’d been talking to thin air.
Ben had long escaped…
The clerk frowned and gazed at the floor. “Shoot…Billy, you screwed it up again…This is why daddy always says you’re no good…no dang good…Didn’t tell him about the hole-sale dickscount...’
Advertisement
- In Serial263 Chapters
Rise Of The White Dragon
June 15 of the year 2010, the third awakening happened. Several smaller worlds had returned to connect with the main world as living beings of different races started to appear and some people managed to connect with the origin and gain control of various powers: control of fire, of water, of wind, of air, and of earth… In the midst of all these confusions, towers that gave unimaginable powers began to appear in all corners of the world, where those who already had powers could upgrade and become more powerful or even those who did not have powers could receive powers through tests of the tower. And because of these towers, conflicts started to happen in all corners of the world by those wanting to monopolize these towers.
8 1830 - In Serial11 Chapters
Tales of Tarasandia: Sir Eyan of Benold
On a quest of love, Sir Eyan of Benold is set on rescuing the lost Princess Theadasia from her dragon-guarded tower. But when he arrives, things are not as he expected.
8 248 - In Serial71 Chapters
Circumventing Fate
When Lei Xing booked a luxurious cruise as a graduation present to herself, she expected to have plenty of well-deserved rest and relaxation with an ocean view before jumpstarting her career. What she did not expect was to be the unlucky person who would fall overboard to a miserable watery death… or so she thought. To her astonishment, she opened her eyes to find herself in an ancient setting, a different body, and a new life as the eldest daughter of a high court official. {...Okay, at least I'm rich...I can still live happily and freely, it's still a golden opportunity at a second life. I can live it well~...maybe go travelling, start a business, or something…It definitely could be worse...} To Lei Xing’s horror, her new host was scheduled to enter the palace to compete in the concubine selection for the new Emperor. {...What?! I am definitely not interested! Of all places, it’s that viper pit! I’m not built for any Royal BS or harem fights. Please keep your scheming lives to yourselves and leave me the hell out of it, NOT INTERESTED!!!... Can I not go, please? T_T)...No? Nevermind then, failure is always an option... Failure is the only possible outcome. Bring it on! Hahahaha…} While Lei Xing was making plans on how to skip out of town, fate was also very busy working out its own plans for her, mapping out its own course for her life behind the scenes... Poking holes in her plans to her confusion and outrage. "...Little chicken, as long as I'm alive you won't die." "Nonsense, if anyone is going to cause my death, it would be you!!" *** "Do you really feel nothing after all this time?" He asked as he looked at her with searching eyes, trying to see into her soul... "...Who...would..." she mumbled under her breath... *** "That stupid old man, I'm going to end him when I find him...You better hide well!!" |||~~~~~~~~~~~||| Author's Note~~ Thank you for stopping by and I hope you enjoy the read as you go along! Please VOTE and COMMENT as you read along and I will be sure to respond~~ Thank you again and HAPPY READING! ~~And if you have the wonderful urge to ever buy me a coffee. Here are the gateways and some love~ Kofi: https://ko-fi.com/miraisaesang Patreon: https://www.patreon.com/MiraiSaesang
8 171 - In Serial9 Chapters
Gaslgiht
There is a common line of questioning that falls upon students within their first moments at Kingsly. “Why?”. The student asks, “Why am I here?”. This is a futile line of questioning. There are those who remember, and those who do not. I’ll spare you the technical explanation — that’s what we have teachers for. The jist is as follows: those who remember are... how do I put this... more likely. They occupy more time. and the space that time has allowed them — the pertinent amount — is experienced no matter what. Allow me to offer you a bit of personal information: I am not one who remembers. There is no time relevant to me, no space that I occupy. I exist by carving myself here, and continue to exist in the same fashion. You would do well to follow suit. Why am I here? Because I force myself to be. Because the universe, the universes, for all its kicking and screaming, cannot escort me out.
8 241 - In Serial25 Chapters
A Horcrux's Fate
(COMPLETE) Harry Potter triumphed over the final battle against Lord Voldemort, but just as everything appears peaceful, he soon realized that it isn't over as it seemed. Something deep inside him feels wounded and is drastically withering away—a sign that his life is in grave danger. The truth of being a Horcrux will set off a chain of events that'll test his strength and will to survive. But the question is, how far will Harry have to go before he accepts his grim fate? Timeline: Post-Hogwarts Pairing: Harry/Ginny, Ron/Hermione Canon compliant Disclaimer: All of J.K.Rowling except the plot
8 178 - In Serial27 Chapters
hot stuff ☕︎ | richie tozier
'shut it, tozier. i'm just trying to enjoy my summer without you flirting with me''i'm not flirting with you, i'm just being extra friendly to someone who is extra attractive'
8 97

