《Parasitic Sword Monarch.》Chapter 184: The two smiles.
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"Visrama... Yes, if it's a prayer then I think I can understand it."
Yin Long gave a small nod as he took in the woman's explanation. A prayer wasn't always just that, a plea that a greater force would help you. Sometimes it was just something people used to give themselves the courage and the will to live another day, and sometimes it was the only way they could convey their well-wishes to others.
Perhaps those aspects were strengthened all the more here, in these people. Those who had nothing would clutch onto even the smallest thing they could get their hands on, even if it was an empty prayer that could do nothing more than soothe them.
"You don' need to think about it too hard, youngin. It'll come to you o'er time, this pit tends to do that to the unfortunate souls that end up 'ere. But when you do start prayin, I hope that your prayer's one o' courage an' not one o' despair, we got enough souls cryin for a quick end."
The woman gave a light shake of her head, evidently not fully believing Yin Long's understanding. He was just a kid, and he looked so fresh that he had probably just arrived here, it wouldn't be strange if he couldn't understand why they prayed. Hell, even she hadn't understood it at first. But this place had a way of beating you down, grinding you down until nothing remained. In the end, that prayer became all you had, perhaps only then would you be able to understand it.
But for now, she didn't think that there was a need for a kid to think about that, he should still have many years before his desires were ground down. As such, she stretched out her arm and pointed down one of the roads, he should at least get some rest as he prepared for the inevitable end.
"If your lookin' for a place to rest then you can 'ead down 'ere, if you walk for bout twenty or so mins then you'll find a house that'll give you some rooms. It ain't far from the Resting Station so you oughta check it if you get tha time, but you best make sure your heart's prepared for what you'll see. The end ain't ever easy."
She didn't explain what the Resting Station was, but she spoke of it as if it was a graveyard, or perhaps a hospital that housed those who were approaching death. But he felt like there was more to it than just that, it didn't seem like a place you'd recommend someone else visit if it was really something that simple. But still, whatever the case was, he lowered his head slightly to show his gratitude, turning his gaze onto Lan Yun after he thanked the woman.
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"Alright, I'll make sure to keep that in mind. Thank you for the information, and the food. Shall we go?"
He held the plate of food in one hand but held out his other arm, or rather, his elbow. His life had been hectic, especially after he left the clan. He was always running around, training and studying wherever he went. When was the last time he ever just took some time to relax with Lan Yun, when was the last time he ever did right by her? She seemed to have understood his intentions, smiling brightly as she wrapped her arm around his elbow and held him close.
"Yup, let's go, Young Master."
His right hand was warm thanks to the food and his left arm as well as his side was warm thanks to the body pressed against it. His lips twisted slightly, seemingly unsure whether or not they should curve upwards in joy or down in sorrow. He gave the woman a final nod and then started to walk away, the woman tilting her head with slight curiosity as she watched him walk away.
Yin Long and Lan Yun walked through the streets, which were a bit narrower than what they were used to seeing, wagons and carriages probably weren't used too often here. He didn't rush. He wanted to find the others again, he wanted to reclaim that which was lost. But he couldn't rush, haste made waste, and he was no longer someone who could afford to waste.
"It's a nice place, Young Master. The people feel a bit more hollow, but it definitely feels like a nice village. I hope the Celestial World is like this as well."
Lan Yun commented as they walked, her gaze constantly shifting about to take in both the scenery as well as the people that moved about. They looked like normal people, but you could tell that there was something missing, they were like a puzzle that was slowly unravelling.
"The Celestial World..."
Yin Long chewed on the word a little, unsure of what face he was making. Quite frankly, he didn't have any good emotions towards the Celestial World, nor the Netherworld for that matter. The Celestial World was the one that created Lan Yun as nothing more than a weapon and the Netherworld was the one that detonated it to rob him of what he held dear. So he couldn't feel good about them, no matter how much he tried, they felt like thorns in his lungs.
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"You shouldn't make a face like that, Young Master."
He felt Lan Yun's hands land on his face as her voice reached him, her fingers smoothening out his brows and twisting his lips upwards. She smiled at him when he raised his gaze, that gentle and calming smile she always showed him.
"Celestial World, Netherworld, Human World, it's all just people in the end. And wherever there are people, there will always be suffering, just one unfortunate man after another. So smile, Young Master. Smile for those who suffer, smile to end it all."
Her fingers supported his lips, but there was nothing to support her own so even though they curved up they ended up looking fragile, like a flower that could wilt at any moment. Yin Long put down the plate he was still holding, the food that once filled it was already eaten anyway. His now free hand then landed on Lan Yun's hand, holding it close to his cheek.
"I see that my Lan Yun has become more poetic after death. Your heart has also grown bigger while I wasn't looking, I guess that's what I get for leaving you on your own."
Those who went to the Netherworld, those who went to the Celestial World, it was all just people in the end. And wherever there were people, there would be life, and suffering and life went hand in hand. But Yin Long knew that he was selfish, that's why he couldn't say things like Lan Yun, he couldn't tell someone to smile to end someone's suffering. At least, that was what he believed.
"No, my heart has never been bigger than yours, Young Master. Everything I know, I learned from you, always. After all, wasn't it Young Master who first smiled at me when all I had was a body to sell? You smiled, Young Master, and then you bore my suffering for me. So I know, even if the whole world tries to reject it, I know that my lovely Young Master can smile for all those who suffer. You have a smile that won't falter even if it bears all the suffering, all the pain and evil in the world, that is why you were blessed with the law of Yin, I'm sure of it."
She thought back to that day, as did Yin Long. A prostitute and a young master determined to become an assassin, she was perhaps the first one he should have taken full advantage of if he wanted to really become the dark blade of the Lang clan. But he didn't. They had no relation, but he helped her, he gave her a choice, and he allowed her to escape the fate that chained her down.
She suffered, so he smiled for her. He made his job harder to bear her suffering, but he didn't falter. And above all, he kept smiling. It was easy to know others, but it was hard to know yourself. So Lan Yun knew, his heart was bigger than he thought, she was just a reflection of it, minor in comparison.
"Lan Yun..."
Yin Long held the hand tight as his voice unconsciously slipped out, reaffirming the warmth it transmitted to his cheek. She looked at him softly and gently, just as he remembered, the same look he always needed when things got rough. Looking at that expression, that fragile smile, he couldn't force out his voice, he couldn't get out the words he should say. So he just leaned forward instead, resting his forehead against hers as he closed his eyes.
"No... Never mind, it's nothing so just forget it. Thank you for being here to speak sense into me."
Lan Yun closed her eyes as Yin Long's forehead met hers, yet their gazes still seemed to intersect. Yin Long felt the warmth from the forehead, the gentle and familiar scent that tickled his memories, and that voice that always soothed his heart.
"Of course, Young Master. As long as you need me, I'll be here, that's how it's always been."
His eyelids trembled as she spoke, the grasp he had on the hand pressed against his cheek growing stronger. A few looks were cast in their direction, but neither of them budged for a while. They just stood there, one with a fragile and sorrowful smile and one with a forced smile born from two fingers.
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