The cool chill of water was what brought me to my senses. There are better ways to wake up than drowning. I admit that it’s not as bad as falling off a cliff or finding yourself in the middle of an abandoned island. However, drowning is more deplorable than most other ways of waking up by far.

My body didn’t obey my commands, the cold water dug into my skin like thousands of tiny icy needles. It makes me wonder how I managed to wake up in that type of situation… My first reaction was to try and swim up above the water’s surface, but to my surprise I found my arms restrained. They had been tied loosely by a thick rope, absorbing the water and weighing me down.

I looked up above, toward the sky. I was about a meter under the water. The sun was partially blocked by the large shadow of a bridge.

I struggled to get free but the fabric of my clothes clung to the ropes. My lungs were burning and my eyes were growing dim. The rope that held me down suddenly shifted in force and I felt myself being brought to the surface.

If only for a moment, I had a chance to catch my breath. The water slid off me and dripped into the river once more. I hung below the bridge by a single thread of rope.

Before I could figure out what was happening, I was dropped into the water below. This time, the cold chill of the water stung a little less. My skin had either grown accustomed to the chill or gone numb. I was too tired to care. I sighed in resignation out of habit.

The air that had freed itself from my lungs floated gently to the sky.

I renewed my struggle to free myself from the ropes, but only managed to turn myself to face downstream.

I promptly passed out once more.

•••

“What the hell?” I was in the middle of drying myself off with the towel Cur had handed me. “Why did you use me as bait for your fishing rod?”

Cur shrugged, “Because that’s what friends do.”

“Try to drown each other?”

“Yes, all friends try to drown each other… are you stupid? I was getting that off you. I couldn’t exactly remove your clothes. If I tried, I would gain some infamy, and for the wrong reasons at that. I don’t want everyone to say I went and stripped an unconscious guy at a bar.”

“So you tried to drown me instead.”

“So I tried to clean you with an appropriate method. It’s not like you can swim when you are unconscious. It’s not like I want to see a guy dripping wet and tied up with ropes.”

…Doesn’t that mean you want to see a girl like that?

I handed the towel back to Cur. My clothes were still a little bit damp but the blood had mostly come off. That cloud of red I had just seen in the water stung the back of my eyes. Every blink showed me that pure and deep red expanding outward like a cloud of death.

“…Thank you…” I said.

Cur wrinkled his brow, “Wow, I never thought someone would thank me for trying to drown them.”

“…” I went silent.

He started to laugh, “I’m kidding, it was just a joke.” He coughed as he looked away, “Well, with that attempted murder out of the way, you want to eat some fish? I caught it while you were dozing off.”

He cooked the fish over the fire he made before I had woken up. I had thought it was a kind gesture on his part to help me dry off. Although now I suspected it was just to cook the fish.

“So when is our red sweatshirt hero going to come back to the real world?”

I glared at him, “That thing hasn’t fit me in years.”

“You used to wear it everywhere.” Cur’s gaze was almost hollow, “It’s funny how people change as they get older. The three of us used to be inseparable. Now I barely see you in reality, and in the game you go out of your way to avoid me.”

“...”

“Fine…” Cur sighed, laying his back on the ground. He held the cooked fish on the stick above him. “I’ll drop that type of conversation for now.”

I forced myself to smile, “Thank you.”

“But I will return to it after you finish your silly mission. What was it? Saving some damsel in distress?”

“It was saving some kids from the Marquess. “

I knew he hadn’t really forgotten. He was just changing the subject for my sake. He was always afraid to say the wrong things to me. I knew what he always wanted to say, but I forced myself to ignore it.

“Oh right. How long do you have?” He asked.

I thought back on it, but drew a blank. “Really soon, I guess? She was going to go tonight if I hadn’t stopped her.”

“Hmm…” He took a bite of his snack. After swallowing, he sat back up and looked in my direction. “Did you bother checking the quest window? You can usually find out how much time you have from the hints it gives you.”

I grimaced, I hadn’t thought of that. I opened the quest window.

The mother ghoul has escaped from the city guards.

Due to some unknown interference the mother ghoul has avoided being righteously removed from the city. Help slay her before she, in a weeks time, tries to kill the marquess.

Quest Difficulty: D

Requirements:

Spot the Mother Ghoul escaping from the guards.

Know of the the Marquess’ plight.

I shut the quest window, swallowing down the bile that had started to climb my throat. “Cur,” I asked, “Quests normally don’t care if they are good or bad in nature right?”

He nodded.

“Then why is this one saying the opposite of what I agreed to do?”

“Let me see?”

I reopened my quest window, setting it so he could view it as well. He read over it carefully, paying close attention to the minor details. Either that or he was just naturally a very slow reader…

“So what do you think?”

“A bug?” He shrugged his shoulders, “I don’t think I’ve ever heard about something like this happening before. It really is odd, almost as if something else is influencing the quest. It does make me curious about this mother ghoul though… What can you tell me about her?”

As I recounted my meeting with the woman, his expression remained dark. He only opened his mouth after I finished speaking. I told him everything that I knew, from the story, to what I knew from meeting her.

“Not my type.” He lightly fisted my shoulder, “Sounds like she would be the possessive type to me. Not someone I want to try flirting around with.”

I wasn’t even sure how he reached that conclusion, ”Is that why you asked?”

Cur shrugged, “Would I ask for any other reason?”

I raised my hand. I was not against violence. Hemophobia may have limited my actions in that regard, but as long as no blood was spilled I was fine with punching someone.

Even if I wasn’t I would make an exception for Cur.

“So about that skill,” He said monotone, obviously trying to avoid getting punched.

“What do I have to do to learn it?”

“It’s the type that needs to be taught. You normally need to find an instructor like my old ero sensei to teach it. And even then, you only have one shot to learn it.”

“Normally?”

“If you have a advanced level or higher in the skill you can teach it to others. However…” He paused, and for a moment I thought I saw an evil glint in his eye, “You need to be able to dredge up those old flirting skills of yours.”

“I what?” I could feel a grimace forming on my lips.

You heard the man, playboy.

•••

I walked into the plaza next to the fountain wearing chef’s attire. I carried a tray full of pie in one hand, and violin in the other. To be honest, I felt like I was playing the fool. No one else was wearing such a strange outfit over here. The only people wearing this would be in the restaurant district across town.

I twitched. Cur had said he would be watching from the other end of the plaza, but currently, his back was facing towards me. It seems he found another girl to flirt with.

I sighed.

Approach the center of the plaza to begin the test

A buzzer sound rang out as I stepped next to the fountain. My test had started. I had twelve minutes to find and successfully get a date with a girl. Why twelve minutes? I have absolutely no idea.

[00:11:58]

I swept my gaze around in order to find a good person to speak too. It’s been awhile since I did something like this. I kept myself from letting out my usual sigh, it would only lower my market value if any girls spotted me.

Out of all the girls in the area, only a few were viable. There were only three flirtable girls in the plaza. My current criteria was simple: the girl must be alone, she must be above a certain age, and she must not look like she wanted to kill someone. Granted the last requirement is something I learned the hard way. Some people just aren’t good at directing their anger.

I rubbed the phantom pain on the side of my face. Some memories died hard.

The first was a red headed girl next to the fountain. She was suited up in archer’s gear and was glancing towards the clock above the fountain. I quickly crossed her off my list. Her gaze still occasionally swept through the mounds of people around me. She was obviously waiting for someone. The redhead still looked a bit calm so the partner must not have been that late. Maybe in 5 minutes, if that person doesn’t show, she would be a good target. But not right now.

[00:11:51]

The second girl was eating alone at a nearby cafe. She had only one chair pulled up to her lone table so she was definitely not expecting anyone. However she was eating in a hurry, and was quickly switching between her coffee and her meal

.

It was slightly cute when she burned her tongue in her fluster, however that didn’t change the fact that she was in a rush. Flirting with her would also end up in failure.

[00:11:43]

The third girl was a priestess. Her hair was long and silver, reaching towards her lower back. She had a Freyan crest partially obscured by some large oaf’s head. I shifted my feet and started to walk towards her.

She was standing near the alley. Her face looked a bit grim, but that was probably because a group of guys had surrounded her. According to Cur, these type of people seek a coward’s romance. They surround a pretty girl, and coerce her with sheer numbers to hang out with them.

I felt my grip tighten.

[00:11:35]

There were four men surrounding her, all of them looked to be at a decently high level. Well, its not like it would even matter if they were low level noobs, its not like I would be able to fight four of them off... Especially if I tried to avoid spilling blood.

So you are going to let them treat a girl like that? I see how it is.

Instead I held the pie in front of me, pushing my way through the four. In their initial shock they backed away. “Madam,” I said gently, “The marquess is waiting for you at the restaurant, he doesn’t take kindly to those that make him wait.” I shifted my gaze quickly over the four males.

The players visibly flinched. No one was stupid enough to go against nobility. Even more so for this Marquess. Rumors said that he killed everyone that went against him, commoner and nobles alike. No one in this city had a good impression of him.

For players that simply meant that they would lose quests and store owners wouldn’t sell anything to them if they angered the marquess. It was bad enough when you had to use a coward’s manner to flirt, even worse when you couldn’t even have a meal with the girls after picking them up.

It was quite hilarious actually, they instantly started to bicker amongst themselves.

If I was dressed as I usually was, this type of trick wouldn’t have worked. The only thing that separated a player and a NPC was their fashion sense. And currently I looked the part of a NPC chef, I even made the pie myself. They couldn’t tell if I was lying or not, and you could tell they weren’t ready to test it.

“Madam?” I asked again.

Madam? I mentally smacked myself in the head. I used to be so much better at this. What kind of person calls a girl madam, in this situation?

The silver haired beauty smiled, “Thank you, Chef.” she bowed and offered me her hand. Her silver hair cascaded slightly forward, curving gently over an exposed ear.

In order to show her that neither of my hands were free, I shrugged. She grabbed my sleeve instead. Taking the cue like a proper Chef should, I lead her away from the other men. If I wasn’t dressed like a chef and holding a violin and a pie, this scene could be misconstrued as something romantic. They didn’t bother to follow us. A mob of guys chasing after a fleeing girl would only wreck their fame.

I tried to meet her eyes, “I’m sorry, even after stealing you away from those men I have to go back to my work.”

“No, actually thank you from getting me away from them. They wouldn’t go away no matter what I said…”

“I see.” I paused for a moment, “My name is Alair, I am a chef working under the marquess. I hope those guys didn’t cause you any harm?” I gave her my best sympathetic look, tinged with a light but sorrowful smile.

She shook her head.

[00:09:21]

Something odd changed at the edge of my sight. A grimaced surfaced on my lips, but I hid it from the priestess by turning my head. The emotion that surfaced was weak, it was no where near as strong as it used to be.

But you can feel it once more? Are you finally returning to what you once were?

I let out a light bubbling laughter, not unlike what you would expect a chef to have. Giving the lady a quick bow, I apologized, “I’m sorry, but I have some urgent business to attend to. A chef’s life is a busy one.”

“Thank you,” she repeated.

“No problem.” I saluted with pie still in hand, and immediately regretted it. What type of fool parts like that? You save a girl from four guys and then part ways by saluting with pie? Am I an idiot?

The silver beauty smiled, I couldn’t be sure if that was a yes or not. But the affection points for me, the chef, at least would be higher than that of those four men.

What a troublesome guy you are. You could have used this opportunity to pick up that beautiful girl, and yet you decide to be the hero again?”

My eyes glinted with devilish delight, and almost as if I was speaking to myself I said, “Not at all, it’s just I have a pie to deliver.”

[00:08:58]

I sighed, putting the violin in my inventory. I spun the pie in my free hand as I sifted through the crowds, leaving the silver beauty behind.

The four men had formed a circle once again. This time they had shifted to the fountain. I couldn’t see the person in the middle of them, the only thing visible was a black laced umbrella barely visible past the men’s shoulders. Whoever they were surrounding, she must have been quite short. Reaching them in but a moment, I tapped the taller one on the shoulder with my free hand.

“Hey idiots.” I greeted them.

Four synchronized glares settled on me. I was a low level player armed with a pie… what the hell was I doing picking a fight right now? I couldn’t even blame it on the hemophobia stat this time.

“Oh look, it’s the little chef, who ran away with our girl.”

Little? I wasn’t much shorter than they were. Maybe I didn’t feel the need to wear stilts in a game, and change my height. But I wouldn’t call myself little either. I couldn’t understand why someone would try to fix their insecurities in a game. Wouldn’t that just make it worse when they had to return to reality?

I chuckled, fixing the chef’s hat on top of my head. “I have a gift for you. It’s a blueberry pie, don’t worry, I made sure only use the smallest blueberries I could find. Lest they end up being larger than yours…”

I don’t think any of them could grasp the comparison, if they did, they didn’t let it show on their face. I sighed. Don’t any of these fellows have a sense of humor?

“Why does it take four of you to flirt with a girl? I mean seriously, I’ve heard of wingmen, but what type of monster needs four wings? A Cockatrice? Are you trying to freeze the girls in fear?”

The one to answer was not any of the guys, but the little umbrella behind them. The voice was a little too young, almost as if it was a child speaking, “They don’t scare me.”

“Huh?”

“They approached me after I told them that they wouldn’t get any girls like that. For some reason they got really mad at me when I said, ‘No girl would be stupid enough to fall for a guy that has to have their friends hold their **** for them.’ and then surrounded me.”

The air around me froze. I clenched my jaw, in order to hold myself back. I wasn’t mad, not in the slightest. The sensation of laughter was fighting its way into escaping from me. True, the fact that the four men’s veins were bulging in their face was a bad sign. But the sound of a little girl insulting guys twice her size was funny.

The tallest of the quartet turned his back and yelled at the girl, “What did you say, you little twerp.”

“Eep!” The umbrella swung down between them like a shield. The girl must have had her back to the fountain, because she didn’t move any further away.

The black umbrella and the quartet blocked my view of her. The pie felt awfully light in my hand. It took me a second to realize I had already planted it into the back of the tallest mans head. Sticky blue gunk slid down his back.

“I apologize?” I asked.

“Why the heck are you saying like it was a question?” The man spun around, his hand on his his sword’s hilt. The other three did the same action, but took to their support roles and said, “Yeah, why are you saying it like a question huh?”

I took off the Chef hat, blocking my face as if I was embarrassed, “Well, I’m not really sure.”

The quartet growled at me.

I clarified a bit more, “I’m not really sure I should be apologizing. I mean, although I did throw a pie at the back of your head, it’s not like it was an accident. Apologizing when I don’t mean it seems a bit rude, don’t you think? In fact, I should be demanding you apologize to me for making me waste a perfectly good pie.”

“Boy, you do know what’s going to happen now?” The taller one asked, unsheathing his sword.

“Of course, that should be obvious.” I smiled, “You fools are going to forget about the girl you were about to attack while I’m talking. And when that happens, she’ll escape.”

Silence, it seemed they finally caught on. Each of them spun around to face where the girl should have been, but she had already vanished.

I took a step back slipping into the crowd, murmuring to myself, “And while you are distracted by her disappearance, I might as well leave.”

I took off running as fast as my agility stat would allow. I couldn’t be sure they would chase after me at this point. Well, I guess I did make a fool out of them.

Twice

Huh?

You made a fool of that quartet twice.

...I turned around, peeking behind me. The four of them had split up and started to sift through the crowd. None of them looked too happy.

[00:03:12]

I sighed, why does this always happen to me? Whenever I try to help someone out, I always make it worse for them or myself. Now I had no way of making it on time, I should have just stuck with the priestess and ignored the other girl…

I felt a hand pull on the back of my shirt. My heart stopped beating for a moment, I was suddenly very conscious of the fact that I was no longer able to fight.

Instead of a gruesome macho man of the quartet, I saw a black umbrella swinging shyly above a girl’s head. “...This way”, she whispered, dragging me.

I looked back at the four men that were still searching the crowds, making the split second decision to follow the girl with the umbrella. I mean, It’s not like it could end any worse for me right?

“..thank you…” The girl whispered. It was so quiet I almost doubted my ears. But I didn’t feel the need to make her repeat herself.

She led me into a restaurant that did not have a good view of the plaza. It looked like a cheap joint suitable for new players. “I guess I should thank you too, for helping me get away.”

“Sit.”

“Huh?”

She pointed to a free chair with her umbrella, “Sit.”

[00:02:01]

The quest timer was nearly gone. Even in my prime I doubt I could have found a girl, flirted, and acquired a date in two minutes. I really needed to go find someone else.. This girl was a bit too young to meet the requirements for the quest.

The little black haired girl was wearing a gothic lolita outfit. It was a dark outfit with an abundance of white frills everywhere. Way too many frills… I was surprised she could find a tailor patient enough to add so many of them.

Even though I hadn't sat down, she continued to speak as if I had.

“What are your names?”

“Huh?” Did she mean my real name, and my game name? Wasn’t it considered a bit rude to ask that in game?

She looked me in the eyes, and asked, “Why are you two people?”

I went silent at that. For some reason, this girl scared me. She terrified me more than anything else in this game. More than my fear of blood, more than my fear of being late.

“What do you mean?”

“You are a crying boy cradled over a dying girl.”

I clenched my teeth. My fist slammed into the side of the restaurant. The loud thump made everyone turn their heads toward me. Their stares didn’t reach me; they couldn’t reach me.

“Quiet!” I snapped. My voice was coarse and the words barely made their way out my throat.

“Why are you covered in blood?”

I clutched my head, only to tear my hands away with tufts of hair. I glanced at the girl for but a mere moment, and then my vision went red. This was no status effect in the game, I knew that at least.

That should be obvious, right?

•••

I was sitting at the fountain, scrubbing my hands. Just scrubbing, but no matter how long I spent on them, the blood just wouldn’t come off. Her blood just wouldn’t come off.

“Please come off,” I started to cry, my already raw hands starting to peel as I scrubbed even harder, “Please come off.” It wasn’t my fault. It wasn’t my fault… I didn’t kill her… It wasn’t my fault.

The fountain water was dyed a pinkish red as the blood in my delusion slowly covered it. But no matter how much blood I tore off my hands, they wouldn’t come clean. The water got darker and darker. My sense of self slowly eroded away…

A hand gripped my shoulder, and gave a nice secure squeeze. “It’s fine.”

“NO, IT’S NOT!” I screamed.

“Your hands are already clean.”

“I KILLED HER.”

Cur’s fist hit me square in the face, sending me flying into the fountain filled with my delusional blood. The cold water sunk into my clothes, and my heart slowly returned to its normal pace.

“Aren? You finally wake up?”

I nodded, letting the clear fountain water cool my head even further. The water was cold. It froze and bit into my skin. But right now, that was bliss.

Cur reached his left hand out. The knuckles on his right were bleeding slightly. He was hiding that hand behind his back, but it didn’t escape my attention. I accepted his left hand and was pulled out of the fountain. “Aren, this time you don’t have a chance to waste time with that. You learned the skill, so now you just need to go save the kids, right? The loathing and self-hate can happen after.”

I glanced down at the windows. I hadn’t noticed but a single window had been blinking quite frantically.

Quest Complete

You have completed the Gentleman’s Test

Although some would wonder about your taste in woman, it cannot be denied that you managed to get a date with a girl.

You have learned the Playboy’s passive technique: False Impression

One’s attire can easily change how the world reacts toward you. Dependent on your style when you meet someone, their opinion of you will change.

Warning: Does not work on players, or someone that has seen you under a different impression. At higher levels you can fool people into thinking you are high ranking nobility.

Cur sat down on the ledge of the fountain, looking up towards me, “You know, for a commoner, you are a real piece of work you know that? Can’t you leave it to the rich noble wannabees to act like this?”

“...”

He played with the clear water, trailing his finger just below the surface, “What’s the plan?”

I glared at him, “You know if this was a moderately good story, no one would outline the plan they are going to use this early. Isn’t that just dooming the plan in advance?.”

“Or so you say, but it’s me who is going to have to buy the disguise.”

I pouted, “I have money. I bought this didn’t I?!”

“You got that from working in a restaurant didn’t you? And even if you had some pocket change from that absurd amount of low level quests you took, it’s not enough to afford a decent tailor. If you plan to sneak into a nobles mansion, I can’t let you wear such cheap attire.”

•••

“You said you would get me the attire? So why are we just sitting here drinking coffee? I’m in a rush you know?” I complained the entire time while drinking coffee. It was far more expensive than what someone my level should be able to afford.

“Even if I gave you the outfit right now. It’s not like you would be able to sneak in to the manor at this point.”

“Why not? I learned the skill didn’t I?” I wanted nothing more than to march right into the manor and take those kids back. I wasn’t sure entirely on their situation. I couldn’t be sure if it would be too late if I waited. I didn’t want to be late again.

Cur added some sugar into his coffee, “Your timing is off. No new guy shows up midway through the work shift. If you are going to trick someone, you need to play the part the entire way.”

“So, that’s why we are sitting here wasting time drinking coffee.”

Cur nodded, “What good coffee it is.”

I tried to scoot out of the chair and make my escape, but Cur silenced my movements with a single word, “Bill?”

“...I’ll pay you back?”

“That’s not the bill I’m talking about.”

I obediently pushed my chair back, “So what should we talk about?”

We both went silent, neither of us wanted to speak. We could act fine when we still had the formalities to go through, but beyond that, neither of us knew what to say. Neither of us knew how to act alongside the other anymore.

I knew he had a question he wanted to ask. It amazes me even now that he can his patience when talking to me. But I didn’t want to answer that question, at least not yet.

“What skills do you have anyway?” I asked the first thing that came to mind. Maybe I was a coward for trying to escape, but I can’t be denied that I was curious. The fact that Royal Road had playboy skills just seemed odd to me.

“Oh… about that….” Cur looked away avoiding my gaze, “It’s a secret.”

“You mentioned four skills… what are they?” I leaned forward.

“Not telling.”

The silence returned between us. I no longer knew how far I could push him for random questions. I didn’t want to risk losing my only friend.

The window seat next to ours was strangely loud, it set the BGM noise of most of the cafe. I didn’t mind. It covered up the lack of conversation between Cur and I. We always became reliant on others at times like these.

“Hey did you hear about the Red Reaper?” Someone asked his friend.

Cur and I shifted our gazes toward them. We may have been eavesdropping, but we couldn’t really be yelled at within a game. Not like we would care about being yelled at outside of it, anyway…

“You mean the little girl in black clothing?”

“Why would the Red Reaper wear black?”

The friend went quiet..

“But you do know the red reaper I’m talking about right? They say when he shows up in the game, whoever he kills stays dead.”

“So their character get’s deleted? Sounds like the little girl.”

“What’s with you and little girls?”

The friend coughed as they answered, “Well, I heard the same rumor, but it involved a little girl dressed in black. She would always ask the people some weird questions and then follow them around for the next few days before they died.”

“Sounds like another one of your delusions…”

I took another sip of my coffee, “Hey Curv, what’s this about the Red Reaper?”

He leaned back in his chair, he seemed quite happy since he finally had a topic. “Nothing that you didn’t just hear. It’s this guy dressed in red. He appears randomly around Royal Road and kills players. Some say they don’t even bleed.”

“So he stabs them with a scythe?” I asked. I wasn’t sure if the last bit Cur said was true. I couldn’t be sure if he added that tidbit for my sake.

Cur shook his head, “The manner of death is always a bit different. The Red Reaper shows up and the players die. It has nothing to do with the act of mur-” Cur was about to say murder but stopped midway through.

I gave him my best smile, but it still came out as somewhat of a grimace. “And have you heard about the little girl as well?”

“Don’t tell me you were a lolicon all along? She would be crying if she knew this.”

I took a silent breath, ignoring the images that came to mind, “No, I just came across that girl they talked about during that test of yours. Which, you would know, if you weren’t flirting around.”

He raised his hands up in surrender, “Hey, a guy must do what a guy must do, especially when he spots a good looking girl.”

I swigged the rest of the coffee. It was already lukewarm.

“I guess this means that if you die, you will be forced to face that world once again.”

I glared at my friend.

He shrugged and continued to sip his coffee, “You will have to face it eventually, Aren. You can’t live the rest of your life as Alair the Coward. You’ll have to face the real world eventually.”

“Give me time.”

“I’ll give you all the time you need. I’m content as long as the beer is good and there are girls. There are plenty in this world, or that one.”

------------------------------------------------------------------------------

Spoiler : Hello everyone,

I hope you enjoyed this chapter. It’s a bit longer than my other ones, and I hope it will continue to remain that way. For some odd reason I feel like it’s my loss if Cur or Snow’s chapters are bigger than mine… (I’ve yet to exceed either of their word counts)

The story is finally starting to build up. I hope you guys can pick up on some of the things hinted at in this chapter. I do have a overall plot in mind, but plans are made to be broken.

Thank you all for spending your time to read this pointless rant. -_-’

Salutations,

Tui

End Chapter 4

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