《Meet The Freak》Chapter Forty
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Valentine
"Ten acres and you can use the tunnel upon request," Foreman Sanders countered.
Wally shook his head, "Minus the hotel's foundations, the hill is just shy of twenty-eight acres, you're asking for over a third of my farmable land just to cut some time off my supply runs. The pass isn't too much further north. We can go around if we need to. How about this? You can have either one acre on top of the foundation, or four down on the hill. In exchange, I get to use the tunnel whenever I want."
"One acre on the foundation and two on the hill, we need to be able to tunnel, and I don't much like the idea of trying to dig through solid stone that's run through with a mesh of iron."
"And we get to use the tunnel whenever we want."
"And you get to use the tunnel whenever you want," the foreman relented.
Wally's hand covered most of the gnome's forearm as the two shook on it.
"I'd invite you in for drinks," Foreman Sanders offered, removing his sun goggles to place them on his forehead, "But we've not even the headroom for elves."
"It's the thought that counts," Wally replied with a shrug.
"When can we send our surveyors out to choose our ground?"
"Val and I are headed to Pelignos after this, but I'll let my people back at the hotel know about our agreement. So you can send them whenever you like."
"That'd be a clever trick, with you being here in Caniforma. How do you expect to manage that?"
Wally shrugged his pack off one shoulder and pulled it around to his front, retrieving one of the books he'd made.
"Here," he offered, holding it out, "There are more detailed instructions inside, but the short version is that anything written on the relevant page will appear on the page's twin in my book. So if you need to send messages, this is how to do it."
Sanders took the tome and turned it over in his hands. "Huh, clever," he muttered, "Got any other tricks?"
"Yes."
"I bet you do," he mused, "Maybe I'll go with the survey team, I wonder what we'll find."
And with that, the foreman took his leave, descending the steps into the tunnel. I followed Wally out from underneath the sunshade, and gingerly touched his arm. When he didn't shy away, I stepped in closer and took his hand.
He'd begun to loosen up over the past few weeks. He'd become more adventurous, shall we say, though until recently it had only been in private that he'd let me see that side of him.
Bringing the others to the hotel had helped, as had the previous night at The Maiden, and though it made me feel special to be the only one allowed to see his soft side, it was nice to see him finally relax. He seemed more comfortable in his own skin and looked more like a person than a living statue.
Well, okay. He still looks like a statue. But at least he's a more relaxed statue.
I peered up at him, "What now? Shall we go back to The Maiden? You can do unforgivable things to me," I offered.
Wally pulled his arm away gently and put his hands in his pockets, "Actually I was thinking that I need some armour, so I don't get so messed up next time someone sneaks up on me with a knife."
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I felt a little pang of regret as he pulled away. I knew he took guilty pleasure in my lewd comments, but I'd evidently pushed too far. He may have opened up a little, and though I doubted anyone on the street had overheard me, the setting was far from private.
"But that's going to be tricky if I can't fit in the tunnels," he continued, "unless one of the goblin families specializes in smithing."
"The lower levels of The Maiden connect to the tunnels, there is a second front entrance down there. We could call for a smith, have them meet us there," I offered.
"Alright," he replied doubtfully.
"I'm sorry Wally, I didn't mean- I don't want you to be uncomfortable at The Maiden."
"It's not that," he assured me, "I'm just thinking about the numbers here. I need armour of some kind. I just don't know how practical it's going to be for someone my size."
"Well let's talk some smiths and find out. There's no harm in doing some research."
Wally nodded slowly, "Alright, we'll talk to some people and see what they have to say."
Irony made the necessary arrangements, and after promising to foot the bill whatever it cost, I left Wallace to converse with the half-dozen or so gnomes that had shown up.
I padded up the steps back to the common room. I could hear a dull murmur on the other side of the thick oak door. I set my hand on the brass knob and turned, pushing open the door. The conversation within immediately fell silent, and every eye turned to me.
"What?" I demanded, glowering at the women lounging by the fireplace.
Irony grinned, "We were just discussing how you're so obviously head over heels for this human."
I kicked the door shut with my heel, "You're acting as if I'm a little girl with my first crush and gossiping like a knitting circle."
Irony leapt up from the couch and put an arm around my shoulders, guiding me back to sit with her, "He must be very special."
"He's fine," I replied flatly.
"Nonsense," Chastity said with a grin. She was in her usual place on the cushions by the fire, wrapped up in her white robe, "I'm not the only one who remembers your fantasies. By day you'd be the dashing surveyor, exploring strange lands and making off with exotic treasures, and by night you'd be here-"
"Likely tied up or shackled," Irony added.
"Definitely naked," Obedience put in.
"Making all sorts of noises," Virtue nodded.
"You were very clear," Purity agreed, "Said we'd belong to you every minute of the day."
"Mmm, or she'd be ours," Irony smouldered.
Chastity threw up her arms, and her robe fell about her waist, "And the next time we see you, you're with your enormous friend and don't seem to have any interest in sharing him."
"Or yourself," Obedience added.
"Of course I have an interest!" I retorted, "But Wally doesn't, and I don't want to make him uncomfortable or do anything to upset him."
Irony nodded in agreement, "Because you're head over heels for him."
"I-"
"Come on Val, don't pretend otherwise," Chastity mocked, "You always said the only way you'd settle down with someone is if they were either hung like a horse, or very special to you."
Purity sat dangling her legs over the side of the couch, swinging them absently, "So which is it?" she asked innocently.
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I rolled my eyes, "And you lot were going on and on about how well you know me. Please, I'm not one for second best. Wally's obviously both."
Irony tapped a finger against her lower lip, "I thought you were walking funny this morning."
"Jealous," I accused.
Each one of them nodded, grins and smirks all around.
Irony hugged me tighter, "I'm glad you're happy, Val. As much as I like the idea of having you as our only client, it's good to see you've finally found a life you don't feel the need to escape from."
"Girls, I'm sorry," I sighed, "I wasn't even thinking of the promise I'd made."
"Well if Wallace ever changes his mind I'm certainly up for it," Chastity grinned, "But don't bother yourself about it. None of us are looking to get out in any case."
"I've had enough money saved for ages now," Obedience agreed, "I'm not planning on going anywhere."
"Besides," Irony chimed in, "I know few places where I'll be paid to discipline uppity nobles and wealthy merchants."
"Well if any of you ever change your mind, send word to my sister. We're visiting Pelignos next, and we'll be delivering an enchanted book that Wally made to communicate. Let my sister know of any troubles, and she can send word along to Wally and myself."
Wally returned to the common room not much later with a sheaf of paper in one massive hand. He nodded absently at myself and the others, oblivious to Chastity's nudity, and went straight to the room we'd taken for ourselves.
I took my leave of the girls and joined Wallace in our chambers. He was already seated on the couch with his papers spread out on the table before him. Notes, diagrams, sketches of armour, measurements, and several graphs that appeared utterly incomprehensible. It seemed his meeting had been educational.
"I'm not bothering you, am I?"
Wallace looked up startled as if he hadn't heard me come in.
The cycle had become familiar. Wally was deciphering a problem, one where I didn't have anything to add. He generally liked to be alone at times like this. I knew that inevitably he'd think things through, and it would all come flowing out of him as he explained the circumstances and how he thought to resolve the issues. By the end, I'd usually have more information on the subject than I knew what to do with, but I wasn't much use until Wally decided to share.
He hesitated, and for a moment I thought he might indeed say I was a bother, though perhaps in gentler terms.
"I promise not to ask you to tear off my clothes or tie me up."
"It's okay," Wally said with a smile and a nod.
He shuffled over a bit, giving me room to sit beside him on the couch, and I joined him.
"Um, Wally," I began, "I know that I often say such things as, you can do whatever you want to me, but it occurs to me that usually ends in the sorts of things I want. So what do you want Wally? Anything, absolutely anything."
Wally leaned back against the couch and took me lightly about the waist. He lifted me gently and laid me against his chest with my head against his shoulder.
"This right here, this is plenty."
"I'll be quiet, if you like, until you've finished thinking over what you learned," I murmured, "But I would like to hear about it once you're ready to share."
I shivered as Wally began to rub my back, and I let myself relax against him.
"No, it's alright," he assured me, "Here, this is probably the least bad option I've come up with," he explained, holding the sketch so I could see it.
"Brigandine? Seems sensible enough, it's what I favoured before I found this," I told him, lifting an arm, protected by the advanced human fabric, "Speaking of which," I muttered.
I drew away from Wallace and undid the zip of my suit. Wally eyed me warily, but I made a placating gesture.
"I've still got my shift on, and I'm not trying to get handsy. I just want to relax a little, and the suit is not the most comfortable garment," after a moment's thought, I also took off my amulet. I discarded both on the floor and leaned back against Wally. I shook out my hair, and let it cascade down my back and across Wally's chest, "Now what's the matter with Brigandine? Least bad, you said? I doubt you'll find much that's more comfortable. My jumpsuit aside, one must compromise comfort for protection, and even my jumpsuit does little beyond stopping blades and teeth."
"Well that's the thing, I don't need much more protection than that. Humans are already pretty durable when it comes to blunt trauma. As long as you don't get hit in the head and nothing breaks, you'll probably be fine. Sore, but fine. The trouble comes when you're dealing with sharp things that pierce internal organs or cut veins and arteries."
"And you need not concern yourself with breaking bones," I realized.
"Yeah, and while I still don't want to get hit on the head, the sheer mass of my skull does give me some protection. It's hard to shake around or jostle something that weighs about eighty pounds."
"Please," I laughed, "You're exaggerating, you're thickheaded, that much is obvious. But it can't weigh that much."
Wally shook his head, "Human head accounts for about eight percent of a human's total body mass. I weigh about a thousand pounds, so my head is about eighty."
"And you're carrying all that weight on your neck? Gods, now I know why the girls found so many knots in your muscles. You must be so sore."
Wally shrugged, unwilling to burden me with the whole of it, "Thankfully I've got some well-developed neck muscles. So a helmet is still a good idea, but as you saw back in the dungeon theme park, blades are a problem. Brigandine is nice, but it's a lot more than I need. My ribcage will keep most things away from my heart, lungs, all the important stuff. But my abdomen and lower back aren't as well protected. It also doesn't cover my thighs and all the blood vessels inside. All I need is something to keep myself from getting cut. Mail also works, but it's loud, it's heavy, and I need to know to wear it. It's not like your suit where you can just wear it twenty-four-seven."
"I know you're a lot bigger than me, but my suit is made for a human much larger than myself. We could cut it up," I offered, "Craft a garment that would keep you safe."
"Val, we are not cutting up your flight suit."
"It's okay, really," I assured him.
"Val, as far as I can tell, it's the only possession in the world you treasure. We're not cutting up the trophy you earned surveying. I'll find another way."
"Okay, you big sentimental oaf, what other ways have you got?"
"You're right about the flight suit, and two ways come to mind if I want to replicate it. Either I transmute cloth to steel, and hope it stays flexible, or modify cloth so that its strength is comparable."
"I suppose I could see metal forming a workable cloth if the fibres- if they can still be called such -are fine enough. But if the metal is fine enough to fold, won't it be easy for a blade to slip through? Not on a cut perhaps, but an arrow or sword point may make it through."
"On Earth, we've got these things called 'shark suits'. They're for divers that want to swim near sharks. It's a skintight steel mesh that covers the whole body. That's where I got the idea from. But I bet that it's not as simple as weaving some steel wire into fabric. The structure is probably different. I just don't know how it's different."
"Then we need gold and emeralds. Strengthen Animal will work to enhance the durability of silk, gold for strengthening mana, emerald for animal mana."
"That's not going to be cheap."
"We have the money, and I don't want anyone putting more marks on your beautiful body. Irony knows how to take professional measurements, used to arranging for the special garments her clients require, I suppose. We can get her to take your measurements, and have the clothes ready by the time we're back from Pelignos."
Wally nodded, "Alright, but I'd like them to look like normal clothes. Like this, basically. Shirt, pants, nothing crazy."
"Okay," I yawned. Wally's scent and the heat coming off his body was beginning to make me sleepy, "We could get Irony to measure me as well. If there's something specific you have in mind, I'm sure we could get it made."
"You want me to dress you up in cosplay?" Wally frowned.
I shrugged, and put on my best innocent face, "If you like."
"Val, I don't think-" he began.
Then he paused, tilting his head and looking off into the distance. A slow smile spread across his face, but he shook his head.
"Nah," he said finally, "Well... Nah."
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