《How Do You QA Test a Tsundere Android!?》Test 20: Toys
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By the time I return home, it’s already 18:30. I briefly greet mother and Amy in the living room, then change clothes and fix myself a dinner lunchbox from the refrigerator.
I walk into the living room and sit on my sofa chair. Mother and Amy are setting on the nearby sofa, watching some unfamiliar soap opera.
“So? How was your first day?”
Mother turns toward me with prying eyes.
“It was... well, a little messy. Turns out they don’t even have a QA team right now, so I’m a one-man army.”
“Really? That sounds like bad management.”
“My thoughts exactly, there’s nobody to properly teach me the basics.”
Eric doesn’t count, because he isn’t a QA and does an overall lazy job.
“But it can be good. When they gather a team, you might become a team leader!”
Mother grins, probably imagining the salary boost I’d receive in such a scenario.
Me? A leader? Yeah... no.
That sort of tedious job should be left to people who excel in socializing and commanding; I possess neither of these mandatory qualities.
But I keep the objection to myself, since I don’t want to annoy mother. No doubt she’d say something like: “A team leader gets more money! You should aim for the top! Financial problems! Blablabla!”.
“So? Did you see some robots and stuff?”
Amy asks absentmindedly while staying immersed in the soap opera.
“Oh, sure. The androids are totally human and I even have a cute android daughter now.”
... I can’t say that, can I?
It’d be hilarious to look at their dumbstruck expressions, but it doesn’t worth the headache that would surely follow.
“Haven’t seen much. As I said, the management is a mess; I hardly even learned anything about my own role yet.”
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“Hmm, is that so.”
She makes a small nod and continues to stare at the TV. As always, she loses interest in the subject as soon as she finishes shooting the question. Whatever, it’s better for me that way.
I finish my dinner and head to my room.
“Let’s see...”
Ignoring my PC, I turn toward the ancient artifacts which I used as a kid. Even though I haven’t used most of these things for over a millennia, it’s a good that I’m a hoarder and still own these relics.
Among these forsaken toys, there should be something that I can use to play with Lily. For QA testing purposes, obviously!
There’s a stiff limit to the amount of social games which can be played by two bare-handed people. Quite frankly, I don’t even find most of them that engrossing.
Therefore, I shall find some treasure from within my dusty collection.
First, there are countless toy weapons.
They are mostly swords of various lengths and shapes. I can see Lily enjoying swinging a sword and trying to hit me, but Eric already warned me about physical contact and activities.
If something goes south and she’s damaged - I’m going to get a bill with some fine zeroes in it.
Next, I find some collectible cards... fake ones.
Since card packs were too “expensive” for mother to buy, that pushed me to google up real card images and to... print them!
If word chain was difficult for Lily to learn, I doubt she could pull off playing with these cards. There are lots of rules, lots of cards, lots of special effects and so forth.
Finally, I come across a huge bucket. It’s filled with lego. Lots of lego.
All the lego sets I have ever built were deconstructed and thrown into this bucket of doom. This explains why one of the figures I spot is a cowboy in ninja clothes... holding a lightsaber.
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“Hmm...”
Could Lily play lego?
Perhaps she could follow instructions from some dusty manual I have, but what about constructing something original? Was she installed with “creativity”?
I remember trying to force lego on Amy many years ago, but she didn’t like it.
... and neither did she like my printed cards. Or my video games. Or pretty much any game which I tried to play together with her.
Amy never had the right type of brain for lego anyway, she couldn’t even figure out the manuals. She spent most of the time tossing lego bricks into my eyes, that little devil.
A daughter of mine who worths her salt gotta know her lego, no two ways about it. Lily is no exception.
It’s decided then, I’ll go with lego.
After fetching a plastic bag from the kitchen, I sneakily return to my room and close the door.
I’d rather not be seen messing with lego at my age, even if it’s just pouring parts into a plastic bag. I get enough criticism of “Haven’t you outgrown this yet?” for playing video games and watching anime.
Finding all the parts for a specific lego set would be absolute hell. Instead, I stuff the bag hazardly, mostly with 2x1 bricks which I consider to be the most basic and essential.
“What are you doing?”
“A-ah...”
Shivers run across my skin as I hear the door opening.
Mother walks into the room and looks around.
“Playing lego?”
“A-ah, um... I-it’s a little hard to explain...”
“Hmm?”
She gives me a strange look, which makes me twitch even more.
“I need some lego... for work.”
“Huh? What for?”
She shows me a dumb face. Yeah, why would a hi-tech worker need lego for work? It makes no sense, right?
“I... er, they told me that I’ll need to test robots.”
“Oh?”
“So... um, basically I want to try testing them with lego. You know, to see if they are smart enough to build stuff by instructions, or imaginative enough to craft their own creations. Things like that”
It sounds bizarre, but it’s not even a lie. Not entirely, anyway.
“Pft, only you would come up with such ideas.”
She chuckles as she looks at the lego bucket and the plastic bag.
“Good thing we kept all these toys, huh. Who knew they’d come in handy for your job. We really bought you lots of it.”
She makes a sad smile while looking at the lego. Most of it was purchased a long long time ago, when the structure of this family was still remarkably different. Back then, money wasn’t a problem.
“Are you fine with this bag? Won’t it be torn apart if you put too much into it?”
“It should be fine, probably.”
It’s just a generic plastic bag from the supermarket, that’s the only type I know how to find in the kitchen. Supposedly, there are also “legendary” plastic bags, hiding somewhere out there.
“Wait, I’ll bring you a better one.”
She disappears before even hearing my reply. She’s too nosy to my taste, but sometimes that’s not a bad thing.
She shortly returns with a big, red plastic bag. It looks a lot sturdier than the one I have.
《Nick obtained Legendary Plastic Bag》
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