Part 2/2

“Oh, wonderful, glorious, beloved water!”

With a content sigh, I slipped beneath the surface and closed my eyes. So much had happened in the last few days that I really just needed some time alone to wrap my head around it all.

First things first, Mother. She was starting to become a seriously annoying problem. The way she took control of my mind like it was nothing left me quite frankly terrified. If it had just been my mind that she messed with I might not have even noticed, but the way the other two had acted had been a dead giveaway. There were too many discrepancies in the things that they had done and the feelings I got when thinking about them. Clarissa for one was the oddest; there was no reason for me to care about her. We hadn’t been friends in years, in fact, she had been actively trying to get on my nerves so why would I just go and not only be intimate with her but actually act as if we had a deep emotional connection?

Adrienne was the other part, sure I had been in a relationship with him, well her now, but it had been a purely physical thing, at least from my side. I had never actually loved her, I had barely even cared about her personally aside from how good she was in bed. But now the fact that she had abandoned me felt like a wound in my guts. I was yearning for both of them even though I still very much knew that I didn’t care for them.

The only problem was that because of me they were now transformed into dangerous monsters. Monsters, which were apparently mind-controlled by an even more dangerous entity; one that was also fighting for complete control over my own mind.

“Ugh…” I groaned into the water and watched the bubbles rise to the surface. “This sucks balls.”

None of this had been included in my plan. All I had wanted was to get stronger, I just wanted an easy why do get all of my magic under control but instead, I now had lost all my magic and was stuck in a body I had never asked for. A body that had so many tentacles I couldn’t even count them on my fingers! That was in fact another thing I had pushed off till now.

It wasn’t like I hadn’t looked at my body recently, I definitely had. I just never had thought about it without the influence of that nasty God-Like on my mind. It still took me a minute of contemplating before I actually looked down.

Well, when they didn’t move my lower extremities almost resembled a harmless flowing skirt. Eight tentacles connected by a fleshy membrane, it definitely seemed to be more octopus than squid. But what actually interested me right now was not the tentacles themselves – I could deal with those – but what was hiding beneath. Now that the haze over my mind was gone I could very clearly recall the two times that the thing hiding in my crotch had come into action.

Both times it should have been incredibly traumatizing experiences but going over those memories I failed to find any repulsion in me. Two times now I had – for the lack of a better term – devoured human flesh. And while the situations had both been rather traumatizing in their own right, the actual act of eating human flesh hadn’t been all that horrible. The fact that the beak didn’t really feel like part of myself had helped in disassociating with what was happening at the time. The real problem – I had come to conclude – was that the act of eating raw unprepared flesh and organs was far more disturbing to me than where the flesh had come from.

‘So I guess that means I am a cannibal now… though is it really still cannibalism when I am clearly not human? Hmmm… now while this is troubling it certainly isn’t as troubling as the whole reason why I even have to think about any of that…’

As much as my own desires might have played into the last few days, it was undoubtedly Mother who had enabled, encouraged or straight up even enforced all of those situations. When I had gone to the university that night I had been looking for a way to gain more power, and I had found… something only that my mind was drawing blanks as to what it had actually been. I still knew that I had written down something in my Grimoire, the only problem was that I had literally no idea what had happened to it. It was bound in salamander leather so it might not have been destroyed when my father's goons burned down the house. Even if the chances were slim, it was still the best shot I had at actually understanding what was happening and perhaps how I could stop it.

‘Now I just have to actually get it back somehow… something to think about later. First of all, I should find my ‘Sisters’, and after that I…’

All of a sudden my thoughts were interrupted by a tired but surprisingly familiar sounding voice.

“Who or better what the Hells are you? And why are you in my bathtub?”

“Don’t worry I was just…” My eyes widened as I took in the woman before me.

Tall and thin she looked almost like one of the elusive Faey, only that her perceived fragile build seemed to stem more from sickness than birth; her clothes hanging loosely from a frame that must have been well rounded not so long ago. Sickly pale skin stretched across her bones, bruises and scars covered much of what was exposed. What little hair there was on her head was thin and brittle, the white fuzz was almost invisible even in the light. Everything about this woman told of exhaustion and starvation, but what actually shocked me was her face. Gaunt and emotionless she looked more like a specter than a living person. One of her eyes was entirely bloodshot and the other white and hazed, and yet despite that her features were still recognizable to me. My expression hardened when I realized just who fate had put before me once again.

“YOU!” My hands balled into fists, nails digging into my palm from the sheer anger. “It is all your fault! Tell me one good reason why I shouldn’t rip you to shreds right now, Miranda!?”

“My ears….” She seemed to barely be pained by my voice, a little twitch of her eyelid was all the reaction she showed. “You know my name, so I guess you met me before? Sorry… Lady, no idea who you are.”

“No idea…” My frown fell only to be replaced by fury. How dare she be so dismissive of my plight? It was all her fault, if she hadn’t defeated me in that mock battle I would have never even considered seeking more power! It was all her fault. I felt that! Those weren’t my thoughts! I needed to set things right, I was a prodigy I should have never failed in the first place. Though perhaps it was time to MaKE hER mINe!!! NO!

My body acted before my mind had even processed the thought. One of my tentacles swung forward, the chitinous tip darting towards Miranda. She didn’t have time to react, too suddenly had the situation changed. Both our eyes widened in shock when with a wet squelch the spear-like protrusion buried itself in my former classmate's belly. For a second we stared at one another before Miranda casually pulled the spike out of her flesh.

“Cool trick, now… let’s dance!”

The tentacle ripped itself free from Mira’s hand, just in time before several red claws cut through the air where it had just been. I barely had time to jump back when her other hand came right for my jugular. I had no idea what was going on, the entire exchange was too quick for me to follow, but it seemed as if my body saw this quite differently. It no longer mattered if I wanted to attack her or not my appendages simply did. All I could do was watch helplessly as tentacle after tentacle lashed out, retreated, and lashed out again. Miranda was an incredible fighter, especially for a mage but even I could see her wearing down. She was frail and weak and feeling her wounds far more than my body did mine. If this went on I would kill her, not even Mother could want that. I had to stop this!

“Stop!” I screamed at both her and Mother. “This is insane! I don’t want this fight!”

Neither of them would listen Miranda barely bothered to acknowledge it and Mother simply kept using my body like a puppet. Even though I was the one most troubled by this, I had absolutely no agency in it. Equally furious and desperate I tried to wrestle control from the jealous God-like but she didn’t budge, it was like running against a metaphysical brick wall.

“Fuck you, fuck you, fuck you!!!”

It didn’t matter what I said the two crazed idiots wouldn’t listen and I was the one to suffer from it. Back and forth Mirand a and my body danced across the I hated this, I hated being useless, I hated being powerless and I especially hated being controlled!

With a desperate, hate-filled scream I abandoned my attempts at controlling this distorted body of mine, I would not bow to anyone, be they human or godlike. There was one part of me that would always be for myself only, and never again would I let anyone try and take it from me.

I dug, not into my body but my very soul, deep to where the core of my potential rested. Still, it was locked away. Like a shackled beast my power had been brought to heel first by my father and now by a fucking abomination. This would end now!

Using my soul like a metaphorical hammer I crashed into the prison. Again and again and again. I could no longer tell what was going on in the physical world, so focused was I on my task. Then after what felt like ages, my soul and mental strength were utterly exhausted, a tiny crack; nothing more. It was barely noticeable on the vast prison, but it was still enough. I reached out for it and it felt like a tidal wave was crashing onshore. Lighting and storm and the promise of death. It was too much for me to handle the last thing I noticed was a resounding boom, then finally blessed silence…

“… at the! Mira!?”

Voices; they were faint but I could swear they were actually there.

“I’m… alive. Not so sure about your tentacle girlfriend.”

“I’m- we’re- No! What happened here!? I went to get breakfast and come back to our bathroom blown to bits!”

I knew that voice, didn’t I? Something about an elf?

“Your… friend attacked me, screaming something about my fault.”

That voice was also familiar, yes, right… Miranda. We… fought? Did I have a concussion? Was that why my thoughts were blurry?

“And you blew her up? There is pieces of her all around the room! Oh gods… what if you killed her?!”

Slowly the haze from my mind receded – I could feel my limbs, my hands, and the burning pain engulfing everything. My skin felt as if on fire! How could this be so painful? This was worse than when I had actually been burned! Sharp and acute, my body seemed to be laying on shards of glass. Yet despite the pain lacing through me being pure agony it also brought back my focus.

One eye cracked open I looked around the room. What before had been a small but decently furnished bathroom was now shredded to pieces. The tub was broken in two and only chunks remained of the toilet; Water and debris had mixed to create unfathomable chaos, all in all, it looked like a bomb could have gone of in here and nobody would notice any difference. Had I done this?

I reached out towards my magic, to see the state of it, but as soon as I tried the pain intensified by multitudes. The fact that my body felt and looked so alien that I no longer considered it my own was perhaps the only reason I wasn’t screaming at the top of my lungs. Instead only a long pained wheeze escaped my lips as I slowly tried to lift myself up. Almost immediately I saw a blurry shape rush towards me.

“Valerie! You’re alive! Thank the gods!”

“Yes…” My voice was little more than a thin whisper but it was undeniably my own; Mother must have been hurt more than I had hoped for. “Small victories, huh.”

“Sorry did you say something? I’ll help you up immediately!”

“Fay,” Miranda’s voice resounded from behind the elf. “Get away from her.”

The grip on me slacked for a moment only to become even tighter in the next second.

“Why should I? She is injured and needs my help!”

“Fay!” My former classmate raised her voice. “Listen to yourself, this isn’t you. You never bring home people. So either you had a sudden change of heart or the tentacled creep is messing with your mind.”

Several of my eyes opened in shock and suddenly I was dropped to the floor like a wet sack. Both Miranda and Fay were staring at me and all I could do was stare back. There was no way that I could do something like that, right? How would I even go about that? I was still contemplating the how and why of what Miranda had said when she stepped forward and placed a foot right on top of my head.

“By the look on your face you either thought we wouldn’t find out or – and this I find far less likely, didn’t even know you were doing it in the first place. So which is it, a spike through your skull or shackles and talking?”

With how many eyes I had, I didn’t actually have to move to look at her but I still turned my neck out of a semblance of respect.

“Considering how I feel – and probably look, I doubt stabbing me through the skull would actually end my suffering.”

“Really?” The grin Miranda gave me was downright evil. “We could still find out, you know?”

“Nope. Gonna take that talk now if you’re still offering.”

“Almost a shame… Fay, drag her to the kitchen will you?”

“Uhm, sure…” He looked a bit troubled but still did what Miranda had ordered. “I’ll protect you, Valerie, ah wait, that’s just you messing with my head!

I had never admitted to using any mind powers but of course, people were instantly assuming so, because I couldn’t just be liked by someone else like a normal person. A ragged sigh escaped my busted lips. Nothing about me was normal anymore; not my body, not my mind, not even my magic was normal. My body was distorted and strange, bound to an element I barely cared for and half the time it was literally doing whatever it wanted without my input. My mind was clearer than ever before off of my medication but still, it was as much slave to Mother as my body. And my magic and soul were still as unreachable as ever. At least I had somehow managed to not die from trying to force the issue. And now I was going to be interrogated, what an amazing day.

Not even a full minute later I was cuffed and bound to a chair. At least my body was aching so much that even this plastic chair felt like the softest pillow. Looking down at the state of my… fleshy vessel was certainly a sight. The magical conflagration – for I was quite sure that was what had caused the explosion – had burned all the way from my chest to the very tips of my limbs. Most of the skin was scorched and several of the lower tentacles had curled up like fried calamari. As freakish as this body was, it was also incredibly useless. Squishy and soft it was not at all something I would call powerful, and now it turned out Mother had erased my mana channels. If my soul was truly concentrated in the gem in my chest then the reason for my failure to do magic was right there. The bitch had actually trapped me inside a fucking bauble!

“Ha!” A loud demented giggle escaped my lips. “How come this all feels so… familiar?”

“So” Miranda placed a chair in front of me and sat down. “What’s so funny?”

I looked her over, her gums and fingers were darker than before as if blood was pooling in them. Ripping my gaze away from her failing body I met her gaze.

“Nothing in particular, it’s just… I could have sworn to have lived through a situation just like this before.”

“You’re an awoken?” She leaned in closer to study me. “Hadn’t even thought you to have a soul. You look more like some sort of strange Faey than a meta-human.”

“Nope, I am… well, was human just… last Friday?”

“Strange…” Apparently, she hadn’t slept through all of the university classes because she looked actually concerned. “But never mind that, let’s get to what I actually want to know. Who are you?”

“Why Miranda, I am actually a bit upset that you don’t remember me, for all of these wonderful tentacles are your fault. After all, was it not you who wiped the floor with me? And here I thought you would remember me, but perhaps a name is better. Good to meet you again Mira, I am Valerie Sherman.”

“You have to be fucking kidding me!? You are The Valerie, corporate princess of the Mage classes and all-time mythic Bitch!?”

“Well, I guess you could say it like that.”

Barely a moment passed before Miranda broke out into the dirtiest and most self-gratifying laughter I had ever heard.

“Haaa…. Oh boy, that was a good one! I mean damn, I fucked up my life and body but you? What you did is a whole new level of incompetent bullshit. Haha… the great Valerie Sherman is reduced to a creepy tentacle babe with volleyball tits. Honestly though what’s up with the boob job? You look more like a fetish doll than a powerful mage, especially with those two flopping about like this. Seriously now, I could keep making fun of this till I keel over… which with my constitution is probably in about a minute or so…”

The glare I shot her should have been enough to churn milk but instead, she only wiped the tears from her eyes and barely composed herself enough to only giggle every so often.

“Hehe…. Anygay, wanna tell me how the heck you managed to fuck up this badly?”

“For what it is worth you might actually be able to help me out…”

Trying to find a comfortable position I leaned back and regaled her with my epic tale.