Gamer Guild’s Dungeon (Final Shop And Exit)

--- Maya ---

Stepping into the dungeon break room, she found the second one to be almost identical to the first from the Merchant to the ladder and even the opposite stairwell.

“Huh, you got an elevator or something to beat me here?” She asked the merchant, figuring that if the little lizard following her could talk then this guy probably could too. (Beyond pre-recorded lines anyway.)

“Nah, the dungeon has this looping warp thing.” Said lizard answered instead of the merchant. “Technically, there’s only one breakroom and you’re only coming back between missions. He just changes the menu based on your previous floor.”

The merchant seemed to glare at the huntslizard for a moment before eventually sighing. “Since we’re apparently breaking character…”

“Actually this is my default personality past level three now.” The dungeon monster informed the dungeon merchant earning another sigh.

“What are ya’ buyin’?” The merchant asked in a resigned tone.

A little screen popped up in the air in front of her.

(Ooh, store menu!)

She paused from buying anything and instead glanced down at the lizard that was apparently being more helpful than his fellows liked. “Is it actually worth going through the store since I’m leaving?”

The huntslizard seemed to consider that for a moment. “The actual gold is worth more when you trade the excess in for points at the exit store, but the floor treasures -for us those were the kobold teeth- are worth more if you spend them on a floor trinket. Though those will cost points to take out of the dungeon with you.”

“Any idea how many points?” She asked.

“I think it’s like a hundred points per week.” The lizard (kobold) told her.

“And how many points do I have right now.”

The huntslizard shrugged before giving the merchant a look.

“Just because you’re bending the rules and giving her a walkthrough doesn’t mean I have to help you.” The merchant scoffed.

The little kobold rolled his eyes. “Right, so the D-bag isn’t going to help but given the standard rules… you’ve got at least seventy-five points for clearing our floor, plus another thirty or so just from coins and loot. You’ve probably got more than that, but that’ll be your minimum amount.”

“So I can take one dungeon item out with me for a week?” She noted with a considering frown.

“Unless it’s a potion, those are a bit cheaper since you can’t really hurt someone with healing.” The huntslizard added.

“Okay, and the trinkets for this floor are a necklace that boosts stealth, a talisman that boosts stealth and stealth damage, and a totem that-” She froze as she read the item description before her eyes darted to her treasure count. “Motherfucker!”

(We could’ve summoned a dragon if we had one more fucking tooth!)

She paused before slowly turning towards the kobold next to her.

“I don’t like the way you’re looking at me.” The huntslizard admitted.

(Don’t. We couldn’t beat him in a fight one on one, so I doubt we could fight him and the merchant.) Her inner reason told her.

(I don’t know, given the merchant guy’s attitude he might just let us steal the kobold’s tooth…)

Eventually she shook her head. (No, that wouldn’t be heroic.)

(Damn, alignment obligations.) Her inner madness cursed. (I told you we should’ve gone for chaotic neutral.)

Spending three of her teeth she bought the talisman, figuring that even if she didn’t trust the power ups she should at the very least try to investigate them and make sure they really didn’t have a Slaver effect going for them.

Confirming her purchase, the screen blinked out of existence before the Merchant’s hand shot forward with a blinding speed. Quickly retracting said hand, the Merchant stuffed it into his coat before pulling out what looked like a dream catcher with teeth hanging off of it instead of feathers. “One kobold’s talisman stranger.”

“Uh, thanks…” She nodded, accepting the trinket while also wondering (what was that about?)

(He most likely took his payment off of us.)

She blinked once before checking her pockets and finding that not only were all of the kobold teeth gone but that there was also an extra handful of coins than before.

“You’ve got to have maxed out pickpocketing or something with those hands.” She told the merchant with just a touch of awe.

“Min-maxed all of my thief skills.” The merchant admitted. “Makes it easier to do my job in the long run.”

“Doesn’t hurt that your level doesn’t reset with the dungeon.” The huntslizard noted dryly.

“I’m a Boss.” The merchant pointed out with a half-chuckle.

“Like a hidden boss?” She felt the need to ask.

“Like one of the merchant bosses that one-shots you if you try to steal their merchandise.” The merchant boss nodded.

“Uh, got it.” She nodded back with just a touch of nervousness. “Um, uh, I think that’ll be everything.”

“Then feel free to come again, stranger.” The merchant dismissed her as he took a step back.

Shaking her head she turned towards the ladder, “I just take this to get back?”

“Yep, it’ll take you to a door connected to the exit room where you can cash your points in for prizes and such.” The huntslizard nodded.

“Right, well, uh, thanks for everything I guess.” She told the little kobold as she grabbed a rung of the ladder.

“And thank you for not giving those goblin scumbags an easy win.” The kobold responded as she started up the ladder.

“Uh, yeah, no problem.” She half-grinned half-grimaced before starting up the ladder.

After a moment she found herself in a dark tunnel climbing upwards, higher and higher.

(You know this would be a really shitty time for us to fall.)

She stopped climbing before sighing at that intrusive thought.

“You’re tapping out already, gamer girl?” Decker’s voice asked from the air around her. “Was kind of hoping you’d be willing to check something out on the next floor.”

She shook her head before continuing up the ladder. “Yeah, I don’t have enough battery to finish another floor and that last one was a lot tougher than I was expecting even with your warning.”

“Fair enough, I wasn’t expecting that Huntslizard thing either.” Decker admitted, making her pause once more.

“Was that something you found in the dungeon files or whatever you’re going through?” She asked cautiously as she began to suspect something.

“Yeah, something like that. Uh, hold on… It looks like you’re about to hit the dungeon exit, I’ll find you outside once you wrap up with the gift shop.” Decker told her, before explaining that. “If the Merchant sees me he’ll know something is up and tell the GM.”

“Fine, it’s whatever.” She sighed, as she noticed a growing light above her before slowly climbing out into a small chamber with a single door.

Moving to open the door she just realized (did he say gift shop?)

In front of her was a large open tent full of dungeon souvenirs ranging from t-shirts and hoodies to mugs and little action figures of the various dungeon monsters. And sitting behind a counter on the other side of the tent was a bored looking merchant.

(I have lost so much respect for these people.)

She ran a hand down her face before sighing and making her way to the counter.

“So, uh, how does this prize thing work?” She asked the dungeon merchant.

“Well since the lizard spoiled it, I at the very least don’t have to give you the asinine exit speech.” The Merchant told her.

(Boo, I like asinine!) Her inner idiot yelled. (Especially when it’s annoying the people who have to put up with it.)

The merchant clicked a button and a nearby machine lit up with the number two hundred and twenty six. “You’ve got that many points, kid, so make use of them.”

A little screen appeared in front of her similar to the merchant’s previous screen, if with a number of options that were different. Notably the one letting her make any of her existing gear permanent for a short time in exchange for her points.

Clicking the option she was reminded that not only did she have the kobold talisman she’d just picked up but also the lightning ring the Huntslizard had given her. (Hmm, I guess if we want to test everything properly then we should probably get more than one point of reference, and a week each should be enough to study both of them.)

With that settled she clicked the purchase button and watched her counter fall to the double digits as the merchant reached under the counter before dropping a box on the counter.

“Uh, what’s this?” She blinked.

“Your prizes.” The merchant answered bluntly.

Curious, she opened the box to find both the talisman and the ring from before. “Wait, didn’t I already have these on me?” She frowned patting down her pockets to find all of her loot missing.

She blinked before giving the merchant a look. “Min-maxed thief.”

“That I am.” The merchant nodded, before putting five dollars and twenty cents on the counter.

“Um, why’re you giving me money?” She asked, after taking the money. (I’m not stupid.)

“Eh, it’s this whole legal thing, and most people end up blowing it on the gift shop merch which costs more than what most people earn from the dungeon.” The merchant explained with a shrug.

“Huh… should you be telling me that?” (Because that’s not the kind of thing scammers usually admit to.)

“You’re apparently a friend of Decker so it’s-” The merchant just shrugged.

“Oh, uh, how did you…?”

“I heard him while stealing your stuff in the tunnel.” The merchant admitted.

“Ah.” She should probably give Decker a heads up on that. “I guess I’ll be going then.”

“Mm-hmm.” The merchant nodded.

Taking her winnings from the dungeon she made her way out of the tent and found herself on the other side of the park from where she’d begun.

“Yo, gamer girl, over here!” Decker called from his position hiding behind a nearby tree.

(He is not nearly as inconspicuous as he thinks.)

(Maybe he min-ed on the stealth skills.)

“Alright, so did you find what you were after or not?” She asked, cutting straight to business.

“Sort of, I figured out there were at least two weird power interactions, but I can’t tell how bad they were since bits of the corruption run a lot deeper than I could get to.” Decker sighed, rubbing at the back of his neck. “At the very least this means there’s another Madness user in the city beyond the GM but I don’t know what kind of Madness user they are or how much damage they did.”

“Yeah, I can’t really help you with any of that.” She admitted, given how she was still figuring out this whole Deviant thing beyond her M.A.D. stuff.

“I’m not really expecting you to.” Decker shrugged, before pulling out a pair of cards. “That said, since you probably tossed my card here’s another one.”

“There are two cards he… you have a Deviant’s Masquerade card?” She blinked upon seeing the non-business card in her hand.

“Yep, pretty much all of the guild lieutenants do at this point.” Decker nodded with a grin. “Figured you’d appreciate having a signed copy, being a clear gamer and all.”

“I only play M.A.D.s.” She told him bluntly as she read his card over. “Also your card kind of sucks.”

“Wha- no it doesn’t!” Decker frowned. “I’m a puppeteer, my whole thing is summoning minions and buffing them up!”

“Uh-huh, and according to this you have a glass-jaw and will die the moment you hit the front line.” She pointed out. “What’s more you’ve got a faction passive, meaning your card is half as useful in any deck without another Gamer Guild Mask.”

“Ah-ah, but I’m twice as effective on a team made of nothing but my guildmates.” Decker argued. “And given how their own passives would buff me like I’m buffing them, that makes it even more valuable.”

“Maybe but the fact that your buff only triggers when you play an Arcane spell makes it luck at best to use, especially since you’re apparently a Corrupted Arcane, half of your deck is going to be Madness cards instead of Magic cards.” She figured. “Probably more given how I’m guessing the rest of your guildmates all use the Madness resource too.”

Decker gave her a look before smiling with his teeth. “I am going to absolutely crush any M.A.D. deck you play against me and my guild deck.”

“As if.” She dismissed without worry.

Decker gave her a laugh before shaking his head. “You’re something else Gamer Girl, still I owe you one, so just give me a call when you want to call it in.”

“Right, I might need that in the next couple of weeks.” She admitted, looking at his actual business card before remembering something. “Oh, and I just remembered the Merchant mentioned something about overhearing you talking to me.”

“Damn.” Decker grimaced before sighing. “Well not much I can do there without making myself actually look guilty.”

After a moment Decker seemed to nod to himself before looking at her. “I need to go talk to the other lieutenants about what I saw here so I’m going to have to be off.”

“Fair enough.” She shrugged, figuring it was getting late for her too.

“Well, in that case I’ll be off.” Decker told her as he turned to leave before throwing a wave over his shoulder. “And if you don’t call me for it, good luck with whatever you’re doing for the Halloween Haunt!”

She blinked before frowning. “What’s the Halloween Haunt?”