"Hey...hey, little fellow...HEY!"

"Huh? What is it?"

Suddenly waking up from his day dream by his ghostly companion, our hero looked around, apparently still in a daze.

"You alright? You just looked at some dry shit under a tree for almost an hour now."

"Uh...yeah, yeah I'm alright. Just...what am I doing here again?"

Said our hero, as always completely aware of his surroundings.

"Didn't you want to choose an evolution?"

"Oh yeah. Stupid me, well let's hurry up, before something happens."

...

...

…

"So?"

"Nothing, just thought that something would happen that contradicts myself."

"That is quite the pessimistic approach to life."

Claimed the ghost, obviously placing more faith in favor of the rulings of fate than our hero does. Yet even our pessimistic hero will see that even he can’t always get the short end of the stick. He just has to believe in the almighty narrator and only good things shall happen to-

Time limit on selection ended. Choosing random evolution.

...

"...You know what? I’m not even angry."

"You sure?"

"Yes. I’m fine. Absolutely fine. Completely utterly FINE!"

"I have a feeling you aren’t being entirely honest here. Calm down."

"OH I AM CALM. I AM CALM AS A FUCKING DEATH CHILD."

"I don’t think that is a healthy comparison to make."

"WELL FUCK YOU! FUCK THEM, FUCK YOUR MOTH-"

Bitching (E) is evolving!

Bitching is evolving to~

*Que Pokemon music*

"FUCK YOU PRESS B!"

Evolution stopped.

"YEAH. THAT SHOWS YOU WHO IS IN CONTROL BITCH."

...

Bitching (E) evolved regardless

"NOO, HOW COULD I SEE THAT SHIT COMING PLEASE?"

"You really should have seen that coming."

He really should have seen that coming.

Bitching, due the intervention of chaos , evolved to screech of discord (D-)

A sound so shrill and loud, it physically attacks its targets. Often used by Banshees

and mad house wife's. Additionally any living being hearing

the screech gets affected by minor madness and disorientation.

"YOU WANT ME TO HAVE THAT? THAN YOU GET WHAT YOU WANT!"

"...What are you about to do?"

"MAKING SURE THAT ANYONE IN THIS FOREST GETS AS MAD AS I AM!"

He said, not knowing that this was impos-

"REEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE-

Evolution Giant Sloth (Chaos variant) (C) selected

Beginning evolution.

…

"I really should stop trying to talk with him."

…

Did you really have to give him the notification as I spoke.

Yes.

So the time-limit really ran out?

Of course. Would I lie to you?

Funny, because I am pretty sure that once it does, he immediately gets evolved.

…About that-

You know, like what happened at the end of the chapter?

…Well-

Ima tell dave you where the one who stole his lunch yesterday.

…

Shit.