《The Oath of Oblivion》Chapter 60 : Bond Reformed
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“I can’t do this,” Rane shook his head and wiped the tears from his eyes. “I simply can’t.”
“You’re the only one she has now, Rane!” Seoltrin held him by both shoulders. “At least be there for her!”
Rane bit his lip and calmed his trembling heart. Smallie was tied to the bed, gazing up at him in fear. The dark markings of disease had found her, wrapping around her left arm and reaching up to her elbow. Could she have gotten sick because of him somehow?
“You don’t have to participate in the operation,” Seoltrin said. “Just hold her hand.”
Rane nodded and closed his eyes. He’d have never thought the strict old doctor had such a caring side. In the end, Seoltrin was right. Every second they wasted was another second the disease was allowed to spread through Smallie’s body. He walked next to the bed and held the anesthetic for her to drink. It was potent, but nowhere near enough to numb the pain entirely. Smallie turned her head away.
“Please,” Rane brought it closer to her lips. “You have to drink.”
Smallie trembled and shook her head. She knew what was coming, Rane could tell. Her fear had spiked ever since the black markings appeared on her body and no matter what he did, she wouldn’t calm.
“We can’t delay any more.” Seoltrin grabbed the cup from his hand and pinched Smallie’s nose. She opened her mouth out of instinct and Seoltrin poured the infusion inside. “Here,” he pointed to a spot near Smallie’s shoulder as she coughed. That’s where they’d cut.
Rane held her head in both hands and turned it towards him. She wouldn’t be able to feel his touch with the medicine coursing through her, but at least she could see him. “Be brave,” he said and stroked her little head. She probably couldn’t understand him, but it didn’t matter.
The surgeon brought the scalpel down and Rane focused hard on Smallie’s face while blood spurted near the edge of his vision. Smallie’s eyes went wide and she exhaled in soft gasps. With each tremble of her little body and each spasm of pain, he cursed Leylin in his head. Dangerous thoughts of horrible vengeance and murder he didn’t want to have. Why hadn’t he killed the bastard? He hadn’t been afraid to die, so why? There was a brief blast of heat. Smallie’s arched back fell back and her eyelids fluttered.
“Bandage her.” Seoltrin wiped the blood from his hands and sighed. “We can only hope that it didn’t spread further.”
“You’re going to be okay.” Rane kept stroking Smallie’s head while the surgeon bandaged her wound. Even through so much pain and shock, she hadn’t cried, and she hadn’t made a single sound. He could only imagine what she must have seen to be scarred so deeply. He took her toy horse out of his pocket and gave it to her. The little wooden animal always seemed to calm her. “What if she gets infected?” Rane asked Seoltrin. It wasn’t rare for patients to suffer from other diseases after being operated on.
“The odds are better if they’re children. Little ones are stronger, both physically and mentally.” Seoltrin rubbed the back of his head. “If it does happen, I’ll take care of her personally. My origin magic might be useless against Leylin’s disease, but it can stop most others. No matter the case, I’ll stay by her side.”
“Thank you.” Rane furrowed his brows. He braced himself and looked at Smallie’s other arm. The bandages had already turned red, but the wound seemed so small.
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“You’re punishing yourself,” Seoltrin said. “Why?”
“I could have prevented this,” Rane replied. “I could have.”
“Alright, that’s it.” Seoltrin grabbed him by the collar and tugged him up. “You’re gonna take a break for a few days, understand?”
Rane shook his head in disbelief. “Weren’t you the one that told me to be here for her?”
“You were when she needed you. Now she has to rest.” Seoltrin dragged him all the way outside“Besides, if you’re in distress she’s gonna know. For her sake, clear your damned head.”
“How am I supposed to do that?” Rane protested but didn’t resist. The old man was too feeble for it.
“That’s for you to figure out. Didn’t you want to find your family? Focus on that.” Seoltrin turned around and went back inside the infirmary.
“Easier said than done,” Rane mumbled under his breath. He snuck a last glance inside the makeshift infirmary, to see Seoltrin sitting next to Smallie before leaving. At least she was in good hands.
As the waves of ashfen that lost their homes gradually lessened –in both frequency and intensity– Rane had found the time to roam Danira. Today, he thought he’d try exploring the side of the city that faced the Silyran borders to the east. Most of the refugees arrived there and the tension was heightened as a result, so he’d left it for last. Even if the sights, the smells and the people of Danira hadn’t jumpstarted his memory like he had hoped, the experience itself was interesting. The capital felt poor compared to his only point of reference, the capital, but the people seemed much warmer. Perhaps it was the more direct threat of war that drew people together, making them more open to conversation and interaction.
As if on cue, a soldier carrying a long spear that crossed him stumbled to an awkward stop. “Can I help you?”
“I’m looking for two people,” Rane replied. “They’re siblings... around my age. A blond man and a dark haired woman.”
The soldier rubbed his chin. “Can’t say I know someone like that. I’m fairly new here.”
“Thank you anyway.” Rane gave the man a smile and continued on his way. He had made it a habit to ask around, but with how little information he had it was no wonder no one could help.
It took him nearly two hours on foot to reach the city’s eastern gate. He nodded to the guards as he exited towards the forest. The remnants of the refugees still littered both sides of the dirt road that led to Danira, but the ashfens themselves were no longer there. Everyone that had made it here was either in the city or in the ground by this point. From what Rane had heard, he had apparently caught the tail end of the disaster. Compared to only a few days ago, the woods seemed much more peaceful. It wasn’t hard to spot Loric knelt by a stump, skinning a hare. The Lanar straightened his back and wiped his sweat with his sleeve.
“How is she?” Loric asked without turning.
Rane came to rest beside him and pondered over his words. Loric cared much more for Smallie than he had anticipated. “Shocked and hurt,” Rane said. “But she will live. The operation went as well as it could have.”
Loric sighed and let his head hang. “How did you know where to find me?”
“Just a guess,” Rane replied. “No soldiers train this early in the morning, and you mentioned that you wanted to hunt near the border, where the forest meets the desert.”
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“I see.” Loric strapped the hare back to his belt and wiped his hands of the blood.
“What? No groan?” Rane chuckled and gave him a playful shove, to lighten the mood. Maybe to get his head away from the poor girl. “No brass words about how I don’t know you?”
Loric just sat there, looking down at the cut stump. He pushed against the dried bark with his thumb. “My son succumbed to sickness when he was eight. I fought the disease by his side as he grew weaker for many months... In the end, no doctor, surgeon or mage could save him.”
“I’m sorry.” Rane had purposefully avoided asking about Loric’s son, to not dig up old wounds or memories. He touched his sword’s scabbard. The royal heirloom meant to be passed down from father to son suddenly felt wrong to carry. “What was his name?”
“Methra.” Loric’s voice broke in a muffled sob. “Methra Eswald.” Deep blue grief lingered around him, the color of the sea.
“You were there for him.” Rane placed his hand on the man’s back. “Ellin told me what you did. Even after his passing, you went against Silyra, the Lawforge and your friend to bring him back. You did all you could.”
“But it wasn’t enough. It never is.” Loric palmed his eyes. “In the end I accomplished nothing.”
“That’s not true,” Rane said firmly. “This ordeal made you stronger, able to help others. Just like you helped me.” He paused, then sighed. “Sometimes I stop and wonder. If my family’s all gone, if I never see them again… What would they want me to do? Keep pursuing a hopeless search and live in misery, or help others when I can? I don’t remember much about them, but I’m hoping it’s the latter.”
“Even then, what can I do?” Loric asked. “In what sort of world do innocent children get sick and die? In what world are thousands of people forced to abandon their homes to avoid being hunted down and slaughtered? How can you fight for such a world when all that it brings is torment and suffering?"
“It’s because a certain someone taught me to never give up. To wield the world and bend it to my will.”
Loric wore half a smile. “You’re either stupid, or misinterpreting my words on purpose.” He rubbed Rane’s head with his palm. “And I don’t have the heart to crush your dreams. I just hope you don’t strain yourself trying to achieve the impossible.”
“Shouldn’t you know not to worry about me by now?” Rane asked. “I can fend for myself.”
“I’d take credit for that as well, but you’ve surpassed my wildest expectations on many occasions. And I’d set them pretty high.” Loric sighed, pushing against his knees to stand. “If anyone can make a difference, it’ll be you.”
“I’m gonna do my best to subvert your expectations once again!” Rane smiled. The misty manifestation of sorrow around Loric had turned faint.
“How can you make me feel better so quickly you brat?” Loric chuckled. “It’s almost uncanny.”
“Sometimes a different perspective is all you need.“ Rane smiled, then paused, relishing the forest’s cold breeze. “No luck on this side either, I’m assuming.”
Loric shook his head. “If the tree species in your memory existed here, I’d have already found them.”
“Don’t worry. It was a long shot to begin with.” Rane pursed his lips. A long shot, maybe, but all he had to go on. He didn’t want to admit it, but he was starting to lose hope of ever finding his family again. Perhaps Leylin had already gotten to them first. He shuddered at the thought.
“I did learn something that might be of use,” Loric continued and Rane perked up. “Some of the troops were talking about Danira when I overheard them. The old Danira. They say the city has been rebuilt dozens of times, following after the shrinking borders, but that it’s taboo to talk about. I almost had to beat it out of them.”
“Then perhaps… Perhaps I could find traces of my family members there? In the old city?”
Loric shook his head. “It’s deep in Andren territory now, and razed to the ground. Nothing but ashes, they said.” He paused, placing a hand on Rane’s shoulder. “I’m sorry.”
“It’s fine,” Rane gave half a smile. “You did all you could.”
“I should be on my way. Don’t want to be late for morning instruction.” Loric shielded his eyes from the sun. He and Rane started walking back to the gate. “What are you going to do now?”
“Seoltrin forced me to take a break, so I don’t know.” Rane shrugged his shoulders. “I might actually rest for a change.”
“You? Rest?” Loric raised his brows. “Now that’d be a sight.”
“I’m serious.” Rane rubbed the back of his head. “For once, I think I need it.” It had been less than a week since he and Seoltrin began treating the ill, but it felt like months. His entire body ached from the tiredness, and headaches came and went by the hour. A few days of rest were truly in order.
“Good.” Loric waved to one of the guards at the gate. After the Lanar’s many excursions, it seems they’d gotten to know him. “I’ll come by your room in the afternoon then.”
“See you there.” Rane nodded his farewell, walking back towards the western side of the city and the infirmary. Part of him wondered about Liera’s condition. She had fainted right after the procedure yesterday, so it was hard to assess the damage Rane had caused throughout. Hopefully it was minimal, but he knew not to have high hopes of that. Tearing one’s soul open was no simple matter.
The streets had gotten much more lively as the morning ripened, with humans and ashfen alike roaming the city. Large beasts of burden had arrived from the capital and neighbouring cities today, carrying food and medical supplies. Ashfen circled around them –always orderly and keeping distance because of the disease– and waited for their share of bread, cheese and fruit. They weren’t allowed to leave the city for now, lest they spread the infection to the ashfens that lived in the kingdom. It put a huge strain on Danira and its people, but it was necessary.
Rane kept out of sight. The mage’s robes had attracted weird gazes from the ashfen several times, and he didn’t want to stir unease. He made it to the infirmary and started climbing the many stairs, humming a low tune to himself all the while. It was weird. He couldn’t quite remember where he had heard it before, but it was firmly stuck in his head. The infirmary’s ceiling filtered the rays of the sun through tinted glass, keeping the area pleasantly warm.
Asah stuck her head outside and peered in his direction, her expression relaxing. “You gave me a scare! I wasn’t expecting anyone.”
“Sorry.” Rane waved at her, then gazed at Liera. It could have just been the daylight at work, but it seemed like some color had returned to her. “How is she?”
“Hazy still, drifting in and out of consciousness. Even when she’s awake her mind… It’s not always there.” Asah returned to her side, gently peeling back the bandages off Liera’s chest, still fresh with blood. “But she should survive thanks to you.”
“I hope so.” Rane sat on the other side of the bed and held Liera’s hand. She stirred a little, eyelids fluttering. Small gasps of air came from her each time Asah pulled part of the bandages back. The salve, though potent, couldn’t heal that deep a wound and she had bled plenty. “Hang in there,” Rane squeezed her hand a bit harder before turning to Asah. “I’ve been meaning to ask... I know that being soulburned and unable to regain the nora your body requires in time can be dangerous, but this is the first time I hear of someone’s nora being unable to return entirely.”
“That makes two of us,” Asah replied. She frowned as she tried to wrap the new bandages over Liera’s chest, lifting her as gently as she could. “What’s the question?”
Rane narrowed his eyes. Her worry was faint, but he could feel it. Was she lying? “Just what sort of training caused this?”
“I’m afraid I can’t answer that.” Asah didn’t raise her head. “I am entitled to some secrets, same as you.”
“I understand.” Rane didn’t want to pressure her for more, but he had an idea he couldn’t get out of his head. If he could reach into a person’s soul and plant some nora inside… Couldn’t he take some out as well? His first thought was Leylin, but that didn’t fit this case. Leylin had admitted to merely copying Rane’s powers. He ripped the souls from their bodies entirely, not just the magic inside. Rane felt a sudden chill. “There’s another Empath,” he mumbled.
“What was that?” Asah looked up.
Rane focused on her eyes. Pale –almost glowing– emerald, but only a single color. It couldn’t be her. “It’s nothing.” He chose to hide it regardless. It was only a guess to begin with.
“It’s never nothing.” Asah chuckled. She fell back on her stool and threw the dirty bandages away. “But I did just lecture you on secrets I suppose.”
Rane simply smiled and went back to observing Liera. There was something familiar about her, but he couldn’t quite tell what it was. He ran a hand over her collarbone, marvelling at how thin she was. Rane knew what malnutrition could do to a body first hand. Liera’s eyelids fluttered again. She slowly rolled her head on the pillow to face him.
“Hey there,” Rane said softly. “How are you feeling?”
Liera’s gaze held his own. Her lips trembled, as if she was struggling to speak.
“Don’t stress yourself. You need to rest.” Rane leaned forward and gently lifted her head to turn the pillow around.
“So mindful of you,” Asah giggled.
“I’ve spent enough time being cared for to know what’s comforting.”
“I’m sure being archmage Atinas’ disciple must be quite traumatising,” Asah replied, “even for a young, robust man such as yourself.”
Rane pursed his lips and nodded his head. “You have no idea.”
“Oh, I don’t?” Asah stood and pulled up her robes. There was only metal underneath, intricately crafted legs that shone with nora. “I’ve had my fair share of troubles, as you can see.”
“Amazing,” Rane leaned forward to observe. He’d have never thought the technology used for constructs could be applied in this manner. Perhaps there was hope for all the poor ashfens being treated after all.
“You’re a weird one, child,” Asah said softly, letting her robes back down. “Most people are intimidated.”
Rane’s mind flashed back to his mother. Something about the gentle, caring warmth Asah radiated had taken him back to his mother’s embrace for a brief moment. She seemed unlike the archmages he had seen, casual and calm most of the time. “Well, I’m not,” he replied.
Asah tilted her head and smiled. “Weird or intimidated?”
“Neither!” Rane frowned a little. “You really like pulling my leg, don’t you?”
“What can I say, it’s easy,” Asah said as she rummaged through the selves by the bedside. There were dozens of vials and herbs on the wood. “Just don’t pull mine. It’ll probably come right off.”
“I– Ugh.” Rane cringed. “You’re horrible.”
“A privilege enjoyed by those I like,” Asah replied. “And I’ve definitely taken a liking to you.”
“Why?” Rane asked, suspicious. “Because I’m useful?”
“Because you’re kind.” Asah let the words rest for a moment. She knelt down to check the lower shelves. “I asked around. Ever since you got here, you’ve devoted all your efforts into treating ashfen. I hold no allegiance to Andre or special feelings for my kin, but it did warm my heart.”
“I... Did not expect that.” He’d miss this feeling, being appreciated. Vaguely, he understood why Asah reminded him of his mother now. “Thank you,” he said. “I try my best.”
There was a lull in the conversation. Asah said she had asked around, but how much did she really know about him? An archmage’s reach was great, Rane had found. “Shit,” Asah mumbled under her breath after a while. She reached into her pocket and took out a glyph shining with nora. “I have to go.” She looked around over her shoulder. “Could you watch after her?”
“Sure thing.” Rane raised an eyebrow.
“Thank you!” Asah left in a hurry, the metal of her lower half clanking against the floor.
Rane circled around the bed and took her place on the stool next to Liera. His eyes glanced at the vast collection of items on the shelves, before turning to Liera again. To get such preferential treatment and have an archmage looking after her, she had to be important. Was that why he felt like he’d seen her before?
Liera blinked slowly, her eyes fixated on the glass ceiling and the wispy clouds above. Rane leaned closer and pulled the bedsheets away to expose her chest. On the left side, the burns he had caused covered the layers of scars and cuts born of Asah’s torture. Guilt surfaced in him. Even now, he had to focus on not feeling her pain. If he had been quicker and more precise, perhaps she’d be able to answer his questions on her own.
“Just who are you?” Rane asked himself. He couldn’t shake the feeling that he knew her. Hesitantly, he leaned closer to her and held her eyelid open. Bright red iris, with a tiny smidgen of blue. Eln’s nora had firmly taken root within her soul. His hand touched hers, looking for the pulse that ran beneath her fingertips. Proof that she was still there. That he hadn’t failed her.
Liera took a sudden, yet soft gasp of air. Her hand squeezed his once, then twice. It was so weak that he barely felt it. She pressed down on his palm with a trembling finger and moved it around.
For some reason Rane trembled whole. Something screamed at him in the back of his mind. Whatever it was she was trying to convey, he should know it. He should understand it. “Liera?” A thought sprung to his mind. Could she be– There was a tinge of excitement in the air, like a vibration running down his back and electrifying his limbs.
“Asah!” Rane heard the man’s screams before seeing him. “He’s dead!” The blonde man nearly collapsed as he stumbled to a stop, panting. “Sasha’s oath is gone. She–” His eyes fell on Liera and Rane felt a small jolt of his panic. “What are you doing to her?”
“I just– She was–”
“Get your hands off her!” The man screamed and Rane complied. He rushed to her side to check her pulse, visibly relaxing.
“You don’t have to worry,” Rane said. “I helped stabilise her.”
Blake turned around and their gazes locked as they took in each other’s form. Rane’s heart skipped a beat and he just sat there, slack jawed. The blonde hair, the scarred face and high cheekbones, he could recall them. It felt as if the man had taken flesh from a vague, half-lost dream born during an uneasy night. That day, on the beast, it had been him.
“Brother?” Blake completed Rane’s thought, voice draped in disbelief. “Rane?” he repeated more firmly.
“Yes.” Rane nodded and the wild beat of his heart thumped in his ears. Could it be this easy? Could he have truly found his brother? He glanced at Liera to the side. She felt familiar because she was the one he’d seen. The bruises and cuts hid it well, but it made sense now. “How can you recognize me?” he asked Blake with a trembling voice. “How can–”
Blake fell on him and wrapped him in a firm hug. The man’s joy reflected off of Rane, a white light more brilliant than the sun’s. “Do you know we’ve been searching for you?” Blake’s voice broke between sobs. “How hard we fought?” Blake pushed him away to look at his face, as if admiring him, only to pull him back into his arms.
“I didn’t know how to find you.” Rane felt the tears streaking down his face. “I’m sorry. I’m sorry I put you in danger. I’m sorry you had to suffer because of me.”
“But you found us.” Blake nodded almost frantically, as if trying to convince himself. “You’re back.” He laughed. “You’ve come back to us. This isn’t a trick, is it? Some weird magic.”
“I hope it’s not,” Rane chuckled in turn. He looked at the man up and down, and his build brought another wave of vague recollection. There were so many things he wanted to ask. So many things he craved to know about his past. “So Liera,” he said and pointed, “she is my sister?”
“What do you mean?” Blake tilted his head. “Of course she is.”
“I–” How could he tell Blake that he had lost his memories? That he was little more than a stranger now. It wasn’t fair. Not after they had fought to find him. “I can’t remember much from my childhood,” he decided. There was no point in hiding the truth from Blake. Not when Leylin knew what they looked like and had sworn to come after them. “They say my mind was wiped clean, save for a few memories. I didn’t even know her name...”
Blake pinched his temples and closed his eyes. He flopped onto an empty bed and took a few deep breaths.
“I’m sorry,” Rane said.
“No, I get it.” Blake looked up at him solemnly. “So all this time... All those years… Where were you?”
“Well,” Rane rubbed the back of his head and gave him a bitter smile. “This is gonna take a while.”
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