Gentle light quivered through the soft, sun-bronzed room along with the ticking hands of the all-glass clock. Billows of tepid, equable air fluttered the chiffon overlay of the drawn, thin, charmeuse curtains. The drifting fabric cast blurred, undulating shadows that reached languidly toward the sleeping girl on the nearby bed. Her thick, sable hair was scrawled across the duvet which nestled up to her chin. A single arm was tucked neatly at her left side, on top of the puffy covers. Palm up, the girl's hand curled limply around the outstretched hand of a sedentary boy who had fallen asleep in vigil.

The weak flick of a few fingers faintly grazed the boy's rough knuckles, prompting the tips of his eyebrows to crinkle ever so slightly. Two pairs of lashes flickered in unison, and sore limbs creaked into listless motion.

"Darren?" The girl croaked quietly as her dim, lavender eyes latched onto his russet-brown ones. Her hand had slipped from his as she wearily sat up.

Darren's mouth was slightly ajar, vaguely shifting as he struggled to overcome his speechlessness. She had finally awoken, and he could only blink blankly at her stupor. She had been asleep for several days now, and he had only just woken up three days ago himself. Essairyn was stronger than Darren, so he was hopeful that she would wake up soon after him. But as the first day dragged into the second, and then slouched to the third and fourth today, a burning guilt began gnawing at his core should his friends never wake up.

"...Sairyn." He managed to whisper gutturally before swiftly leaning forward to embrace her gently.

Startled, but sluggish, Essairyn let Darren hold her for a second before reaching up to pat his back softly. "Hm, it's okay." She had read his micro-expressions when they contorted from dazed to distressed. If she weren't so enervated, her own face might've mirrored his in reaction.

Darren pulled back, holding her at arms length. His concerned eyes carefully inspected Essairyn to double check she was fine. This once over induced the corner of her lip to curl up in languid amusement.

"Just a little knock out and you're staring at me like a mother would a child."

Darren froze, and then glared at Essairyn. "Hey! It wasn't just a 'little' knock out! You were asleep for almost a week!"

Her eyes shot open in shock. "You're kidding me!!" She nearly shrieked. "I was asleep for that long?!" Her mind spun in all sorts of directions, trying to grease the gears for calculation of how she could possibly be knocked out for so long and how injured she must be then. In haste, she patted herself down to check for the function of her limbs and any lacerations. But finding none, she halted her hands in confusion and looked briskly around the room in full realization of her circumstances.

"Where... are we...? And—!!" She jolted, spinning around to face Darren with rising panic. "—where's Aispin?! Is he awake?" Her last question was softer in worried anticipation as she remembered him saying he wanted to take most of the hit. "And, Leœss? Akari?"

"Akari is fine—she was the one who brought us here." Darren peered grimly into her eyes before continuing slowly. "As for Aispin... he's just like you were—asleep. But...he's in worse shape than you. Whatever spell or trick he set up, he..." His eyes flashed about nervously. "..he definitely took the brunt of the reflected damage." Darren stared at the bed covers with narrowed, dark eyes.

"It was due to his actions that I guess you came out mostly unscathed, b-but, I'm not sure... it just... doesn't feel right. It doesn't make sense to me after brooding over it for several days now. Dr. Cyanmay said that the injuries don't line up based on the magic cast and reflected. But he's not certain either since he's not magically adept with only a weak mana flow..."

"Dr. Cyanmay? Is he someone who helped us? Is that where we are?" Essairyn asked while glancing up at the cozy ceiling and scrutinizing the homely furniture. It sure didn't look like a hospital or anything, so perhaps this was his abode.

"No wait, before you answer that, what about Leœss? Is he oh..." Her words trailed off as she witnessed Darren's expression plummet while tearing his gaze away. A dead silence ensued.

"....What happened." It was no longer a question.

Darren's face darkened even further before easing into a look of helplessness. He closed his eyes and let out a breath with his jaw squared. "He..." The words dripped at the grueling speed and bare silence of a leaky faucet. "...he.." Darren's involuntarily voice choked as he stumbled upon his words and gripped his white knuckled fists. "He's no longer—he's dead." The last two rushed out like a torrent, smacking Essairyn so bluntly in the face that her mind stopped functioning for a second.

"..excuse me..?" Her voice was barely a whisper, more like a withheld breath. She couldn't possibly comprehend the weight of Darren's words.

Without warning, she whipped aside the covers, startling Darren who reactively jerked back into his chair and almost fell backwards with it. He hardly rebalanced himself and the chair before Essairyn had swept past him toward the closed door and flung it open, nearly banging the knob onto the adjacent wall.

"Where is he?!!" Essairyn's desperately strangled tone diminished the weight of her vehement demand.

"I—" Darren halted, paused, and then stood up straight, plodding stoically toward her side. "Let's go see him." His mahogany eyes glimpsed her quivering fist. He grasped it gingerly with his own and marched staunchly forward.

It was as if Essairyn was walking through a vacuum of senses where the only tangible sensation was the crawling drip of dry perspiration that clawed at her back. She remembered nothing of the house and garden on the way to the simple gravesite marked by a few fresh flowers squeezed between hand-sized stones.

Upon reaching the seemingly insignificant mound of partly dried dirt, Essairyn's legs buckled beneath her. She flopped to her knees, encasing her shins in what felt like stained soil.

"You can't possibly—this can't possibly be—" Her jaw trembled to force back the ensuing wave of reality. "You can't—just—!" Essairyn's vision fogged with thick drops that tumbled pitifully onto ground that could never again be beautiful. Her fingers seized clumps of earth, applying enough pressure to crush the moisture out of them. The very soil cried with the lost girl.

"Y-you said—I promised—we were supposed to go meet your older sister and her family! To eat her terrible cooking, show that you became a real knight, and that—!" She covered her eyes with her forearm, plugging the loathsome tears while also supporting her falling torso with it. "What about Ami? What about Kyla? What am I supposed to tell your little sisters? What are they supposed to tell your little brother? Why—?!!"

Essairyn spluttered, gagging on her emotions from a tightening chest and throat. It wasn't like they had known each other that long or that well, but why, why did it feel like something vital was collapsing around her, leaving her in pitch darkness?

Oh. A clear voice echoed starkly in her head. It's because I miss them. The voice of her shadow quickened, blurring with the voice of her inner ego. She was not grieving for Leo. But for herself. His siblings had lost their older brother, but she had lost her entire family and world. His family had reminded her of all that had been snatched from her and which thought she had accepted.

But she had never truly given up her past life and loved ones. They were all always on the edge of her mind, prodding at the unfeeling walls that were erected to safeguard her heart and sanity from crumbling. She had been chasing death, prodding death, and now death had caught up with her, played a game with her, teased her with the lovely, tempting bliss of forgetfulness to only snatch away her walls through the death of another.

Ah. Was this my fault? She wondered. If she hadn't been so reckless. If she hadn't been so short-sighted. If she hadn't dragged people and just stayed alone, if she had just—!

"Essairyn."

A warm hand laid comfortingly on her shoulder. She gave one last heave while intaking a shaky, prolonged gulp of air before slowly inclining her head toward Darren.

"..yeah?"

"....." Darren swallowed his words, not wanting to say anything that could potentially tip Essairyn's tremulous balancing scales to one side, resulting in another bout of unwanted tears. While he believed that she needed to let the emotion out, he could also discern her desperate desire to cocoon herself in the security of her apathy. She hated not being in control of herself and her destiny, and she wasn't feeling steady enough to sift through the ambivalent quagmire of her twisted, inner shadows in relation to her somber reality.

So, Darren tugged gently at Essairyn, helping to lift herself up from the ground. Then, he grasped her dirtied hand and heedfully led her away from the gravesite resting on the outskirts of the outdoor garden. They walked through the flowers and foliage in serpentine directions. Essairyn hardly knew or cared where they were going. Yet, the golden glimmer on the brilliant greens and rainbows of the garden pierced through the haze of her dull, lavender orbs. She couldn't help noticing how truly beautiful this location, this world was as it continued without a care for the fallen.

That impression triggered a wry smile to plaster itself humorlessly over her mien. It was a beautiful world, one that she had always wished for in her perpetual daydreams. But it was also a beautiful nightmare. It had taken everything precious away from her. And now it was aiming to take what little attachments she had unknowingly built away from her again.